13. DEAN

My anxiety had been building all day. It’s something I’ve not felt in a long time and I remember how much it fucking sucks.

I’m yours.

I’m yours.

I’m yours.

Those two words have been the only thing keeping me calm as they play on a constant loop in my head.

Willow finally gave herself to me and she didn’t break.

Even if she’s not fully on board with our relationship yet she soon will be. I just need to work harder at it, find out what makes her happy and give her what she needs.

Whilst we cook together, she's laughing and smiling. This is the first time I”ve seen her this relaxed.

We take our food to the couch where I suggested we watch something together whilst we eat. A candlelit dinner seems out of the question right now. I”ve always thought they looked awkward anyway.

As I sit on one end, Willow sits as far away as possible. I put my plate down so I can slide her closer to me. She lets out a little yell of protest as she tries not to drop her plate but she doesn’t stop me. In fact, I swear I feel the tension in her muscles fade after a few moments and she starts to lean into me just the tiniest bit.

Handing her the remote I tell her she can pick what we watch. “This is all horror,” she says, turning her nose up at my entire for you page being full of horror movies.

“You don’t like horror? Yet you were fine watching me kill someone and you didn’t seem to mind me fucking you covered in blood either?” I say into her neck making her shiver.

“I almost puked when you murdered that guy and well, no, I don’t watch horror because I don’t like being scared. I usually watch romcoms or anime. No, not hentai before you ask.”

I snort out a laugh. Fuck, this feels so good, her being comfortable enough to act like this around me.

I tongue my cheek, suppressing a laugh, as I watch the disgusted faces she makes as she keeps flicking through the horror titles. A particularly gory one that I know has a lot of jump scares comes up and I snatch the remote from her.

“Hey!”

“We can watch one of yours tomorrow, tonight we’re watching this.” I press play before she has any time to protest. As it starts she settles next to me and eats her food. When I take my first bite I realize it tastes pretty bad but I don’t want to say anything and end up making her feel bad.

Willow looks up at me and makes a face that makes us both laugh. “So we’re both terrible cooks then,” she laughs. “We have that in common, at least.”

“Yeah, sorry, I don’t cook for myself much and never had a reason to cook for anyone else before,” I say as I take the plate from her but she keeps a tight grip on it.

“No, we”re both eating it. It’s the first thing we’ve done together and I’m not just going to throw that away. Plus it’s the first meal I’ve ever cooked.”

“What? I assumed you loved cooking” I say, surprised.

As she tucks a loose hair behind her ear she shrugs. “I never had a chance to cook whilst living with my dad.”

I’m sure she was well looked after at home. From what I”ve found out so far, her mom was out of the picture, she died when Willow was less than a year old according to the death records. The photos I saw online of Willow and her father made them look like they were a happy suburban family. A far cry from the so-called family I had to endure. But then her words from earlier pop into my head. All I’ve known my whole life is being locked up by men that think they know what’s best for me.

Was she talking about her father? What the fuck did he do to her?

I gently take hold of her chin and make her look at me as I ask, “why did you leave home?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Willow, if someone hurt you I need to know.”

“So you can kill them?” She snaps her head to the side and I let her go.

“Just tell me,” I say more softly this time.

She sighs and purses her lips but then she finally says, “my dad kept me locked in my room most of my life. When I wasn’t at school or keeping up appearances for him I wasn’t allowed to leave.”

And I’m doing the same to her now. I should feel bad but I can’t, not when it means I get to have her. No matter how wrong it is, I”d do anything to keep her as mine.

What I do feel is pure bloodthirsty rage.

“Why? Did he hurt you?”

She shakes her head. “No, he just said awful things and…and sometimes he forgot about me. I’d go days without seeing him or anyoneelse, I’d be lucky if he remembered to give me food some days.”

My jaw clicks as my teeth grind together. I know what I have to do. This man needs to be taught a lesson. One he’ll be sure to take to the grave.

“I know that look, Dean. You can’t do anything. I made sure he wouldn’t be able to find me. Can we please just watch the movie?” Keeping her head down, Willow tucks into my side and I lift my arm over her shoulders.

I want to press her for more information but there's no way I’m interrupting her cuddling into me like this. Some of my rage subsides but the need to hurt someone still scratches at the surface.

I knew this movie was a good idea. Willow’s already screamed three times and is practically sitting on my lap. “You might want to cover your eyes for the next part,” I warn her and she presses her face into my shoulder just before someone loses their entrails on the screen.

Her hair smells so good, like lavender, just how I like it. I wasn’t sure if she’d like the new products I bought but she’s used them without complaint and her hair really has come back to life, just like the rest of her. She’s so vibrant, like my own personal sunshine.

“How can you watch these things?” Willow says, muffled against my shoulder, then her little face pokes up to look at me. “Oh, never mind. This is probably boring for you, like watching someone else do your job.”

“Little kitten, I’m not a masked serial killer that terrorizes teenagers.” I turn my nose up at the thought. I’m brutal in my kills but I do it for money not because I’m crazy.

“How did you even get into it? Killing people. It’s hardly something you see advertised.”

“Someone I used to know gave me a job and it just sort of went from there.” I know I’m being vague but I don’t see how her knowing the gritty details of my upbringing and how I discovered I felt nothing but happiness after my first kill will do any good.

“And you enjoy it?” she asks, unable to look me in the eye as the words leave her lips.

I consider my answer before saying anything. Eventually, I settle on the truth. “Yes.” I’m worried if she asks anything else we’ll lose all the progress we’ve made tonight. I’ll have to either lie to her or she’ll look at me like I’m a monster.

“That’s enough questions for now. You’re missing the good bit.” I point to the screen.

“There are good bits in this movie?”

“Ouch,” I say, pretending to be offended. She laughs behind her hand then squeals as I drag her onto my lap so she’s facing the tv and I spread her legs with my own. This time when I grab her I’m careful to avoid her cuts.

Before she can say anything, I slip my hand down between her thighs.

Fuck me.

I didn’t actually expect her to be wet.

I’ve never been so glad to deny her underwear than I am at this moment. I wish I could see how she looks, stretched so far open on me like this.

She tenses as I swirl my fingers around in her wetness.

“Anything you want to say, little kitten?”

She shakes her head but her hands grip onto my outer thighs rather than trying to pull my hand away. I happily accept the invitation and push one finger inside her. She’s a quivering wet mess and only gets hotter and wetter the more I fuck her with my finger. I add a second, then a third until she’s stretched around me.

My cock’s twitching imagining it’s inside her in my fingers place but it’ll have to wait. I want this to be about her pleasure. It’s what she needs and I’m sure as fuck ready to give her that.

“Dean,” she moans.

God, I love it when she sounds like that.

”Yes, Willow?”

With my free hand, I gently play with her nipples under her shirt and she moans loudly. The loudest she ever has without the pain I usually inflict on her. I like the sound of it. It tells me she’s letting herself go and just enjoying the pleasure I give her.

Her tits, just like the rest of her, feel like they were made for me as they fit perfectly in my palms.

“You want to come, baby?” I breathe the words onto her neck making goosebumps form.

“Yes,” she moans softly.

“I didn’t hear you, baby.”

She whines but doesn’t repeat the word like I need her to so I withdraw my fingers.

“No, don’t stop,” she gasps as she grabs my arm trying to push me back in.

So fucking feisty, I laugh to myself.

“You going to be a good girl and tell me how much you need to come?”

She’s silent for a few seconds as her body practically vibrates on me. I expect she’s not going to play along but then she surprises me by quietly saying, “yes.”

I reward her with one finger and she sighs like I’ve just given her everything her heart desires.

“More?” I ask as I lick her neck.

“Yes,” she says louder this time, but not loud enough.

I push a second finger in and as I pump them viciously in and out of her I ask her the question again. “More, little kitten?”

“Yes,” she almost screams. Her pussy clenches tight and it’s a struggle to push my third finger in but I force it past her taut muscles and a feral scream rips out of her throat. “Yes!”

I can feel how close she is so I stop playing with her nipples and focus on her clit. It feels swollen, like it’s needed my touch this entire time. So of course I give her what she needs. I pinch and circle the little bud until she’s squeezing me hard, milking my fingers like they’re my cock. As her back arches, her ass lifts off my lap, pushing more of me inside her.

“Dean!” she cries out, her screams drowning out the movie completely. I keep fucking her with my fingers, not letting her orgasm end just yet.

Not until she’s soaked my lap.

I add a fourth finger and that’s enough to make her scream out my name over and over as she gives me what I want.

“I–oh, God. I’m sorry, I got you all wet again,” she pants as she comes down from her high.

“Never apologize for something so natural and beautiful, baby.”

I lay her down gently on the sofa. Her body’s so spent that she lies there, limp, as she lets me move her how I want. Hitching one leg over my shoulder I lean down to kiss her thighs then her pussy.

“What are you doing?” she mumbles drowsily.

“Cleaning you up.” I lick her come up, savoring each mouthful on my tongue. I’m so lost in the taste of her that I don’t even think of ruining the moment by taking any more from her. She’s close to passing out again. I could fuck her until she’s asleep and then some, but she’s looking at me so adoringly that I want to leave that image of her with me for a little while longer.