24

24

Edan and I took an Uber back to the hotel. A text popped up on my phone from Maddie as we waited for the elevator.

Going to the police station to give them a statement. The FBI is already here and wants to talk too. We’ll probably be a few hours.

Edan reached for my hand, sliding his phone back into his pocket. “You want to go outside?” He gestured toward the back of the hotel. “They have a nice patio out there.”

I laced my fingers through his. “I’d like that.”

We walked through the lobby and to the patio. It was nearly dark, and a chill had returned to the air. Edan steered us toward the fire pit, where some empty chairs sat near the flames.

“It’s barely cold enough for a fire,” he said with a laugh.

“Does this weather really make you cranky?” I asked.

He turned, still smiling. His cheeks were slightly pink. I’d never seen Edan blush so often, and I realized with a happy jolt that it was because of me.

“Sort of. I don’t appreciate nearly eighty-degree weather in January. But mostly I was just mad at myself for making things awkward between us.”

“I made things awkward between us by lying about not caring if you dated other girls.”

He wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me close and pressing his lips to mine. I took in a breath, my heart pounding so hard I was sure he could feel it. It hadn’t stopped doing that for the past hour.

He pulled away a tiny bit, so that our foreheads were almost touching. “I was trying to play it cool, but I was clearly being an idiot if you thought I was at all interested in dating anyone else.”

I smiled and he kissed me again, pulling away when my phone buzzed. I pulled it out to find a text from Maddie.

Julian is texting me and Noah, asking to talk to you. I just wanted to give you a heads-up.

I sighed, and Edan gave me a curious look. I considered saying nothing, to avoid ruining the mood or seeing that look he always got when Julian was mentioned. But I’d never gotten anything but confusion and sadness from lying to Edan.

“Julian is texting Maddie and Noah. He wants to talk to me.”

He raised his eyebrows. “Do you want to talk to him?”

“God no.”

He laughed, leaning forward to kiss me again before tugging me closer to the fire pit. He sat in one of the chairs and pulled me in with him. It was a tight squeeze, but we made it work.

“Can I be honest?” I asked quietly, playing with the collar of his shirt.

“Of course.”

“I don’t like bringing up Julian with you, but I’m going to have to occasionally.”

His eyebrows drew together. “You can talk to me about Julian anytime. Did you think you couldn’t?”

“I could tell it upset you to talk about him. And honestly, I don’t want to talk about him. I want to go back in time and tell myself to run the other way. To go give that thief who threatened to puke on me a second chance.” I smiled at him.

“What? I never threatened to puke on you.”

“Yes, you did. On the bus ride back from tryouts.”

He squinted, thinking. His lips curved up into a smile. “I remember politely warning you that I might need to puke out the window.”

“Well, it made an impression.”

He laughed and pressed his lips briefly to mine. “I really made a great first impression, huh? You thought of me as the thief who threatened to puke on you.”

“I imagine you thought of me as the scary girl who tackled you.”

“Well . . . yes, actually. But I deserved it, so mostly I was just impressed.”

We both laughed, and then we were kissing again, his arm slipping around my waist. I hooked my fingers into his collar, pulling him even closer.

We were breathless when we pulled away, and I took a moment before I spoke.

“Yesterday, when we were all talking about going to Germany, you seemed hesitant,” I said. “Was it because of the weirdness between us or . . . ?”

“No, it wasn’t that,” he said. “I was still planning to hang around you until you told me to go away, honestly.”

A smile spread across my face. “Really?”

“Of course. I thought I was being obvious.” He took my hand, lacing our fingers together.

“Are you OK with going to Germany?”

“If you’re there.”

I smiled, leaning forward to kiss him. “What do you want?” I asked softly, pulling away just enough to speak.

“You mean besides never leaving this chair?” We were so close that his lips almost brushed mine when he spoke.

“Besides that, yes,” I said with a smile. “What do you want to do next? Or in the future?”

He brushed my hair back, thinking for a moment. “I’d like to travel.”

“That’s right. Mexico and South America.”

“Yeah. I’d never been out of New York City before I went to Atlanta for tryouts. There are a lot of places I’d like to see. Like that city in Mexico you were telling me about. Where you have to walk because the streets are too narrow to drive.”

“Guanajuato.”

“Right. Actually, now that I think about it, I’d like to go lots of places that don’t require me to use my new driving talent.”

“I wouldn’t call it a talent,” I said with a grin.

“I tried to tell you people that I was an avid pedestrian.”

I kissed him and then we were both quiet for a moment, my gaze on my hand on his chest.

“I’ve been thinking about calling my mom,” I said.

“Yeah?”

“Do you think that’s a bad idea?”

“It doesn’t matter what I think. If you want to call her, then you should.”

“But you didn’t call your mom. Even though she kept reaching out to you.”

“It’s not the same,” he said. “I know that letting my mom back in my life is going to be a shit show. She just wants money or someone to scream at and blame for all her problems. Even her messages to me aren’t about me. She hasn’t even asked what I did in the three years since I left home. If she actually cared, she would want to know.”

“I’m sorry,” I said softly, reaching for his hand and lacing our fingers together.

“I feel OK about it. I gave up on her a long time ago. But it sounds like you haven’t given up on your mom?”

“When I talked to Laurence about it, he said that Mom would always choose Dad, and I totally agree. I don’t expect to talk her into leaving him. And I don’t forgive her for letting him terrorize us. But I do wonder if I could have some kind of relationship with her now. Something that doesn’t involve Dad. Even if that’s just talking to her on the phone every once in a while. I . . . miss her, as dumb as that sounds.”

“That doesn’t sound dumb.” He rubbed his thumb gently across my hand.

“You wouldn’t think I was weak, if I reached out to her at some point?”

“Of course not.”

I smiled at him, and he leaned forward to kiss me. I dropped his hand, letting my fingers trail up his neck and into his hair.

When we pulled away, Edan’s eyes caught on something. He went very still. I followed his gaze, past the fire pit and to the man standing near the door.

Julian.

We both scrambled to our feet, and I grabbed Edan’s hand, holding it tighter than necessary. My heart pounded as Julian drew closer.

There were two doors back inside—the one he’d just come through and another down near the restaurant. We could turn and bolt for the second one. Of course, that wouldn’t help us much if he had a gun.

He was close enough now that I could see his face, the firelight flickering across his horrified features.

I couldn’t see a gun, but he was wearing a bulky jacket. There was no way to tell what he had underneath it.

“Seriously?” he whispered.

“Julian, we’re going to go back inside, OK?” Edan said. His voice was calm, but I heard the slight tremble of his words. “Let’s all go inside.”

Julian stared at me like Edan hadn’t spoken at all. “You said there was nothing going on. You swore there was nothing going on.”

I considered trying for logic. I could explain to him that there truly hadn’t been anything going on with Edan, not when Julian and I were together, and not even when we’d last spoken in London. I could point out that it had been seven months since we broke up, and that my relationship with Edan didn’t have anything to do with him.

But it wouldn’t matter. I could get on my knees and cry and insist I was telling the truth, and he would never believe it. And I didn’t care if he believed it. Part of me wished I had cheated on him with Edan. That would have shown excellent taste on my part.

Through the windows, I saw a hotel employee round the corner and walk down the hallway. I tugged on Edan’s hand and moved forward. We had to get close to Julian to use this entrance, but it seemed like the safest option. At least someone in the lobby would see if he lunged at us.

He stayed rooted in place as we edged closer to the door. Only his head moved, his eyes following us.

I grabbed the door handle and pulled it open.

“Did you never even care about me?” Julian asked quietly.

I didn’t stop. I walked through the door, Edan’s hand still clasped in mine. The lobby was just ahead, and we walked quickly toward it.

I heard the door open behind us.

“Were you just laughing at me?” Julian called, anger beginning to edge into his voice. Edan’s hand tightened around mine. “I don’t know why I even wasted my time.”

I could hear his footsteps gaining on us, but I didn’t turn. Two men sat in the chairs in the corner of the lobby, and a teenage girl in a bright pink sweater stood near them, scrolling through her phone.

“You showed me that you were a lying bitch months ago, but I thought you deserved a second chance.” His words were bitter now, and loud. The men and the girl looked up, alarmed.

We stepped into the lobby. There were two people behind the front desk, a man and a woman, and an older woman checking in.

“At least look at me!” Julian screamed.

The lobby went silent. I turned around to face him.

“Please don’t do anything,” I whispered to Edan. He nodded. His expression was tight, his shoulders stiff.

“You never gave me an answer,” Julian said, his voice slightly calmer. “I asked you why he deserved a second chance and I didn’t.”

Edan’s eyes flicked down to me, his fear giving way to a hint of curiosity.

“I’d like you to leave,” I said to Julian, and moved toward the elevators. At the other end of the room, the girl in the pink sweater held her phone up, like she was filming. One of the men made a gesture like she should stop, but she waved him off and kept the phone pointed at us.

“I want an answer!” Julian yelled.

“I gave you an answer!” I said. “You just didn’t like it.”

“You just enjoy toying with me, don’t you?” Julian sneered. “You’re a selfish, lying bitch, you know that?”

The older woman gasped, putting a hand to her chest.

I turned to face the front desk. The man was already coming out from behind it, headed for Julian.

“Can you call the police?” I asked the woman. “He’s not a guest here.”

She nodded, picking up the phone.

“Sir, please calm down. Let’s go outside,” the man said. He gestured with one arm toward the door, like he thought Julian might just need to know where it was.

“Why am I always the bad guy?” Julian yelled. “I’m just trying to talk to her!”

“You’re insulting her,” Edan said quietly.

“Yes, we have an unruly man in our lobby,” the woman at the front desk said into the phone. “He’s screaming at a guest and—”

“I have done nothing but be kind to you!” Julian screamed, drowning out the rest of the woman’s words. “I helped you and I loved you and you spit it back in my face! You didn’t even care that my parents died! I needed you, and you didn’t even care, you fucking bitch!”

The older woman looked absolutely horrified. Like she’d never heard someone speak like this before. I felt sort of happy for her. I almost wanted to say, Congratulations, you must have had a nice family and chosen lovely partners throughout your life.

Julian’s expression twisted as he watched me. I knew exactly which expression I had on my face—nothing. I was good at nothing. I had a lot of practice.

My nothing used to make Dad so mad. Half the fun of this was watching me crumble, and if he couldn’t get that, then what was the point? He was just a hysterical man screaming in a hotel lobby, frightening an old woman and delighting a girl who was definitely still filming him.

I even sort of felt nothing, right now, in the moment. I’d feel it later. As soon as he left, I’d start to shake. Maybe I’d even cry.

The man edged a little closer to Julian. “Sir, I need you to—”

Julian lunged suddenly. He’d always been a nimble fighter, able to move faster than most people.

Mostpeople. But that didn’t include Edan, and it didn’t include me, not after the months we’d spent as sparring partners.

Edan shot in front of me, reaching back to grab both my wrists. Julian threw a punch and missed spectacularly, his fist finding only air as we both darted away just in time.

It would have made me laugh if I hadn’t been terrified. Julian’s punch was wild, and when he missed, he nearly fell, tripping over his own feet.

“Oh my god,” the girl with the phone whispered with a giggle.

Edan and I moved away from Julian as he righted himself. He made a move like he was going to lunge at us again, but the two men at the other end of the lobby had shot across the room as soon as Julian tried to punch us. They grabbed him by either arm and shoved him to the ground. The man working the front desk had to help hold him down.

“I’m going to kill you, bitch!” Julian screamed. “I’m going to fucking kill you!”

The police arrested him. Watching Julian being escorted to a police car in handcuffs might have been one of the nicest moments of my life.

The officers took our statements, and the girl who’d been filming—Tori—showed them the video. Edan and I sat on the couch, holding hands. Tori’s dads asked if there was someone they could call for us, and then stared at us worriedly when we said no. I’d texted Maddie about what happened, but they hadn’t made it back to the hotel yet.

I stood as the police walked out the door. Edan slipped an arm around my waist, kissing the top of my head.

Tori left her dads standing at the elevator and jogged over to me. “Hey, is your AirDrop on?”

“What?”

“Your AirDrop. Turn it on. I’ll send you the video.”

“Oh.” I grabbed my phone from my pocket. “Thank you.”

“I see you. There, I sent it.” She smiled at me. “I already put it on Twitter, by the way.”

“Tori!” one of her dads exclaimed.

“What?” She turned around and walked back to them. “Do you know who that guy was? There was no way I was not going to put that on Twitter.”

Edan laughed softly, and I waved at Tori and her dads as they disappeared into the elevator.

“You think Julian will even spend the night in jail?” I asked.

Edan glanced down at the time on his phone. “Maybe. It’s late. But he’ll post bail first thing tomorrow, for sure. Unless the police can prove he took the scrabs, of course. Then maybe he won’t get out for a very long time.” His expression brightened.

I rose up on my toes to plant a kiss on his cheek. “Let’s hope.”