Chapter 16

Chapter Sixteen

Nina

I wake to find Venn staring down at me. Standing, he’s got his hands pressed to his straight hips, and his head slightly bowed. I can only imagine how strong his neck must be to support his horns. Seeing his horns, I’m instantly reminded of last night, and our amazing kiss.

It had been unexpected but not forced or even hesitant. For a complete novice, who didn’t even know what kissing was before last night, Venn had caught on quickly.

“Hi.” I struggle to sit up, wiping my face with the back of my hand and wishing for some face wash and moisturizer. Already our spotlight is on, and the Hov have delivered our breakfast. “How long have you been standing there for?”

“Not long.”

The way Venn doesn’t quite meet my eyes makes me think he’s lying. Then he grasps me by my upper arms and lifts me effortlessly to my feet as if I weigh next to nothing. Which, compared to Venn, I suppose I do.

“Hi,” I whisper again, enjoying the closeness of our bodies and the new sense of intimacy that comes with having explored his lips with my tongue. With his head bowed, I would hardly need to rise onto my toes to kiss him.

His attention moves to my lips, and I guess he’s thinking the same thing. Then he glances toward the camera in the ceiling and takes a reluctant step back, putting a little space between us.

I shiver, suddenly cold, even though the room is temperature controlled.

To give myself something to do and to hide my disappointment, I pick up a cup of water, rinse out my mouth and spit into the toilet.

Venn rubs the back of his head, suddenly looking everywhere but at me.

“Umm … ” He clears his throat.

I grin. I’d never have suspected Venn of being a prude. He’s infinitely adorable when he’s bashful.

“I will … ” He turns a full circle on the spot and almost loses his balance. It’s the most uncoordinated I’ve ever seen him. Usually, the super smooth floor isn’t an issue for him. He clears his throat a second time and turns more carefully, managing to stop with his back to me this time.

“Thanks.” The word reverberates around the underground room. The rustle of my clothes as I pull down my jeans and panties, preparing to take a piss, sounds a hundred times louder than normal.

I start singing, and Venn glances back at me .

“Hey!”

“Sorry!” He grabs at the bars of the cell to keep himself upright as his feet slip and slide. The back of his neck darkens as he blushes. “What are you doing?”

“I’ll have you know I’m singing a classic. It’s called ‘Wake Up’ and was released in 1992 by the best band in the entire universe, Rage Against the Machine. They didn’t let anybody tell them what to do.”

“Ban-d?”

“Yep, musicians, you know? Anyway, it’s a super famous song. It was even in the first Matrix film.” I click the near-invisible button on the back wall, and the toilet retracts. “I’m decent. You can turn around again.”

There’s a moment’s hesitation, and then, slowly, he faces me. I think he’s trying not to fall onto his ass, Venn with his entire face flushed so dark that his blue skin looks nearly black, his hands fidgeting with the hem of his breeches, like he’s suddenly not sure what to do with himself.

“You’re a gentleman. Much more of a gentleman than this place deserves.”

Venn doesn’t answer. Maybe gentleman doesn’t translate, and I don’t try to think of an explanation. Venn doesn’t need me to tell him he doesn’t deserve to be here. Not after he’s already suffered for two years.

It’s honestly mind boggling how he’s survived so many fights, so many gladiators trying to kill him, so many parasites screaming for his blood. Of course, the scars that crisscross his body tell the story of how much he’s suffered in those years.

Without hesitation, I cross the cell, press both my hands to his muscular chest and kiss my way along the deepest hollow at his right collarbone.

“Nina.” His voice is a moan, and there’s a sharp tug at my scalp as he buries a hand in my knotted hair, cupping the back of my head. I think he’s going to pull me away. Instead, he keeps me close, and I feel as much as I hear another moan roll through his massive body.

His skin is warmer than mine; he’s my own personal heater. And my lips tingle as I kiss across one collar bone and follow another scar over one defined pec. He’s got no nipples, and his skin is like silk.

I only stop kissing his scars when I hear the cells moving and know the Hov are loading the other gladiators into place, preparing for another day of bloodshed. Watchers fill the dais, all gathering before mine and Venn’s cell, like we’re an episode of The Bachelorette .

Evidently, everything has returned to normal after the Ambassador’s visit yesterday.

I step back with a shuddering breath, clenching my hands into fists as frustration turns my body cold. Venn strides away from me, but not before I catch a peak at the impressive bulge in his breeches.

Instantly and thoroughly distracted, I stare at his impressive back, nibbling one of my too-short nails. That man’s got a cock to match the rest of his immense body. I felt it pressed against my stomach last night, and I’m desperately curious to see what he’s packing under those pants.

Not now though. Not while we’re being watched.

I sit down against the back wall, stretching my legs out before me and trying to roll the stiffness from my neck. Last night was the best night of sleep I’ve had since being abducted, but even pressed against Venn couldn’t entirely disguise how uncomfortable the hard floor is.

Reke isn’t in his usual cell. In his place is the alien with a double-edged sword and the exoskeleton that makes me think of a two-legged crocodile in Medieval knight’s armor. I’ve seen him a few times before. He’s also got six eyes, and it’s hard to work out where he’s looking because no two eyes are focused on the same direction.

I think is what Venn called him.

Venn approaches the bars between us and Vlet. Neither look particularly pleased to see the other, but they’re not screaming insults at each other either, like I’ve noticed some of the other gladiators doing.

The parasites watch the interaction with close attention, some raising their tablets to take notes or to start filming. Maybe they’re hoping Venn will pull a Reke and break Vlet’s neck just for looking at me. But I know Venn better than that. He won’t do anything to draw more attention to himself than the attention we’re already suffering.

A part of me hates that he’s been locked in my cell. He’s caught the attention of the watchers just because of his proximity to me, and guilt is a powerful emotion that threatens to turn my stomach.

You didn’t do this. I remind myself sternly. You didn’t abduct yourself or Vennkor. You didn’t lock him in this cell.

But I did speak to him, and I bullied him into speaking with me. And you kissed him.

“Am I on the list? ”

I jump at the sound of Venn speaking, so sure he wouldn’t start a conversation.

Vlet laughs, snapping his jaw.

Venn grips the bars, and I can practically hear him grinding his teeth. “Am. I. On. Today’s. List?” he asks again, the pause between his words the only real indicator he’s got emotions behind his expressionless eyes.

I nudge his foot with my toes, the only part of him I can reach from my seated position, wanting to remind him that we’re being watched. Not that I think he’s forgotten, but … well, I’ve not seen him like this before.

He inhales sharply, sparing me a quick glance.

His eyes are so incredibly blue, like two sapphires, and for an instant, I see so much anguish in them I’m speechless. Then he blinks and looks away, and it’s gone so fast I’m left wondering if it was all in my imagination.

But of course it wasn’t.

I press my knees to my chest and hug myself. I can guess why he’s feeling like that. With me in the same cell as him, we’ll both be sent into the Arena, and I’m not exactly the best fighting partner he could have been paired with.

“You don’t have to worry about me—” I begin, but that’s when Vlet shrugs one skeletal shoulder.

“No,” he says disgustedly. “Neither of you are.”

Venn nods. He doesn’t say thank you; I don’t think anyone expects him to, considering Vlet has already turned his back to us and is practicing swinging his sword, despite the limited space of his cell.

“Sit down.” I nudge Venn’s foot again, and he does as I tell him, sitting beside me close enough that his arm is pressed to my shoulder. I try not to smile. Even yesterday, he wouldn’t have sat so close. Now … Well, now I want to crawl onto his lap and bury myself under his skin.

Instead, I say: “When the time comes, and we’re sent up there … ” I point at the ceiling. “You don’t have to worry about me. I can look after myself.” The words are like peanut butter in my throat, thick and viscous.

He side-eyes me. I can hardly blame him. I can hear my disbelief in my voice. Six months of karate lessons are absolutely not going to save my ass from being murdered. I have to tuck my hands under my arms to hide their shaking.

I’ve seen death more times than I can count. Other people’s deaths. My parents’ deaths. Nearly my death when the car spun out of control. I’d been so scared that I’d pissed myself. Then I’d fainted from lack of blood.

When I’d come round, the firefighters had cut me free of the wreckage, and they’d moved my parents’ bodies out of my sight. But I’d seen them before I’d passed out. I’d seen them, and I’ll never forget what they looked like, bleeding, lifeless and so very dead.

I blink, trying to blink away the memories.

“We are not on the list.” Venn speaks so low his voice is more of a rumble than audible words, and I take a moment to decipher what he’s said.

“Is that usual?” But as soon as I’ve asked, I regret it. I can guess the answer for myself; I didn’t need to make Venn say it aloud.

“I have never been put in a holding cell and not been sent to the Arena.”

“Maybe … ” I try to think of something reassuring and come up short. I can’t imagine what the Hov have planned for us, but it can’t be anything good .

Instead, I disentangle Reke’s broken claw from the hem of my sleeve, where I’d tied it in place using a few loose threads. I’m careful to keep it out of sight of the overhead cameras. I’ve got this stupid idea that’s been stuck in my head since I first stole the claw, and I start carving into the super smooth wall, right at the bottom where it meets the floor.

It’s like trying to cut into marble, nearly impossible without the right tools, and I’ve got to be super careful not to slip and accidentally cut myself on the claw. Venn is watching me, but when he realizes what I’m doing, he slides an arm around my shoulders, shuffling even closer and helping to block the artwork from view.

It takes a lot of concentration; I’m not exactly the best at drawing, and I’m a complete novice at carving. Not even when I was a college student did I graffiti so much as a classroom desk. Now, I’m grateful for the distraction. I just wish I could block out everything from my brain which reminds me that Venn and I are sitting on the floor of a cell, waiting to be sent to our deaths.

Part of me wants it to be over. But another part of me wants this waiting never to end because I don’t want to face what comes next. It’s like I’m being pulled in two directions. I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if I split in half.

I finish carving my first design and begin on the next one, my bottom lip trapped between my teeth.

Is this what being on death row feels like? A tightness in your chest because worry and panic and fear fill so much of your insides that there’s hardly any space left for air? At least the car accident happened so fast there was barely any time to realize what was happening. At least my parents probably never knew they were about to die.

“Nina. Is that … ” Venn narrows his eyes, pressing his lips together until they’re a thin line, and I get the impression he’s trying hard not to laugh.

Joy erupts inside of me, and I sit back a little to admire my handiwork. It’s not the best cock and balls anyone’s ever carved, but it’s probably the first cock and balls any Human has carved in outer space.

“Do you like it?”

He meets my gaze, gifting me with an unguarded glimpse of his feelings. My breath hitches because fuck-a-brick Venn is handsome when he’s happy.

“What is this part?” He traces the words I’ve carved. His translator clearly doesn’t extend to reading English.

“It says Nina Huntley & Vennkor were here. I had to guess at how to spell your name, and I thought double n looked nicer than just one.”

“ Hunt-ley,” he repeats my surname, emphasis on the Hunt. “So that is why the Hov abducted you.” He nods knowledgeably, like he’s finally found the answer he’s been looking for all this time.

“What do you mean?” I frown down at my work, trying to see what Venn sees. My handwriting is messier than I was aiming for. It’s hard to write neatly when you’re using a broken claw for a pen.

“You are Hunter, a warrior of your people.”

“No, I certainly am not.” I shake my head. “I’m not a hunter. I’m a nurse, like … ” I struggle to find another descriptor. “Like a healer. It’s my job to try to heal people, not hurt them. ”

He looks from me to my carving, tracing the individual letters of my name. “I think Healers are even more dangerous than Hunters.” The way he speaks makes it sound as though healers and hunters are more than just a job description. He makes them sound like honorable titles. “Healers give people hope. And I think we need hope here, in the Arena.”

Reke doesn’t make an appearance all that day, or all the next day. Venn is as restless as a trapped lion, stalking from one barred wall to the other for hours on end, and when he isn’t stalking, he tries to sleep, but the spotlight directly over us makes it impossible to rest during the day.

When the second night fell, and the spotlight was switched off, we’d kissed and kissed until my lips were swollen and all I’d wanted to do was wrap myself around Venn like a boa constrictor. I’d wanted to sink into his body. I’d wanted to lose myself. I’d wanted every thought and feeling obliterated from my head.

But it never went further than kissing. Rather, Venn had laid us both down, side by side, and told me to go to sleep. When I’d closed the distance between us to rest my head on his shoulder, he didn’t push me away, for all that his entire body tensed, like it was painful for him to be touching me.

It’s only when the second day ends, and the cheering in the Arena overhead quietens, does Reke finally return. A Hov guard leads him into the cell beside Venn and me after the last of the parasites have vacated the dais .

The Hov guard doesn’t say anything. Nor does he stay. He just laughs at us, like he knows something we don’t, and then leaves, switching off all the lights but our spotlight. It’s just Venn, Reke and I, and there’s a stillness to the air that’s so thick it’s almost palpable.

“Reke. Do you know what’s happening?” I reach an arm between two of the bars, trying to touch him. He remains just beyond my reach, even when I press my shoulder to the bars until it’s painful. “Reke?”

“Nina.” He’s crouching low to the ground and painted in shadows. I scan what I can see of his body in the darkness, searching for signs that he’s been injured, but he looks just the same as always, even if he is avoiding looking at me. He’s watching Venn with such concentration it’s like he can see through Venn’s flesh and bone, into his very thoughts. He looks like he’s thinking about breaking Venn’s neck, and I step between them, disrupting Reke’s line of sight.

“What?” I demand, using my best stern nurse voice.

“I can smell you,” Reke eventually answers, his voice dangerously low. “On him.” And he points to Venn over my shoulder.

Immediately, all my blood rushes to my face. “Oh.” There’s probably something better I could have said, but just for the moment, I can’t think of anything but how Venn smells like … me. Me.

I shift on the spot as the heat travels from my face and down my body, like water running down a waterfall, and pools obscenely between my legs. I’ve no idea why that’s so hot, considering all Venn and I did was kiss, but it is hot.

I glance around the room, at the empty cells, wondering if all those other aliens could smell me on Venn too. Or maybe heightened senses are just a Reke thing.

His gaze snaps to me and he inhales deeply, momentarily closing his eyes.

“You.” It’s an accusation. “You smell different now.”

“Nope.” I cross my arms over my chest, trying not to remember how long it was since my last shower. “No, I don’t.”

His gaze travels down my body, stopping at the apex of my thighs. “You smell like … ”

“Desire.” Venn finishes for him.

Reke nods, as if this is all new to him and he’s only just learning these words. “Desire.” He repeats, like he’s playing with it in his mouth. “Desire.”

“I … ” I can’t exactly deny it, so I shut my mouth before I embarrass myself.

I’ve had sex before, lots of sex. I’ve had adult conversations about desire and lust and boundaries. I’ve just never had this type of conversation with more than one person at any one time. The room is so full of testosterone it’s like wading through waist-high water, making my movements sluggish as my concentration is split equally between Reke and Vennkor.

What’s more, I’ve certainly never had this type of conversation with aliens. Human men I can deal with. So long as you don’t say anything so egregious that their ego won’t recover, you’re good to go. Alien men, though, are a whole other world, and it’s one I’m only just learning to traverse.

I feel as new to this as Reke .

You smell like my Mate, he’d said, and I’ve still got no idea what he meant by it.

And then there’s the fact that Venn and I have been kissing. What does that mean? Friends with benefits? Boyfriend, girlfriend? The love of my life?

I search my feelings and find no definitive answer. All I know is that I don’t want to be parted from Venn. And I know that if Reke were to close the gap between us now, I'd eagerly make out with him. Which probably makes me a bad person. It certainly makes me a greedy person.

Greed ! That’s what I’m feeling. I’m feeling greedy for attention and greedy for touch. I’m so greedy because I’m so fucking lonely and so fucking out of my depth.

It’s exhausting being terrified and angry all the time. I want so many hands on me that I don’t have space left in my head to spare the Arena or the Hov a second thought. I want both Reke and Vennkor. I want them both, and I want them at the same time.

I try reaching for Reke again, but he still won’t come any closer.

“Please.” I’m not surprised to hear the begging note in my voice. “Reke, are you too scared to come closer?” It’s a shitty thing for me to say, but I can’t seem able to help myself. I’d do almost anything right now to get him to touch me. To get either of them … No, to get both of them to touch me.

“Rub her.” Reke speaks his command softly but with the assurance of someone who knows his orders will be obeyed.

I still, my heart skipping a beat .

“Excuse me?” I think I must have misheard. But he isn’t looking at me anymore. He’s once again staring at Venn.

“Rub her,” he repeats, no louder this time, but with such force that Venn takes a stumbling step toward me before he even seems to know what he’s doing.

Rub is such a cat’s command that a laugh bursts out of me, but then Venn is at my back, pressed so close I can feel the heat of his body. And his erection. Yep, I can feel that too, sticking into my back.

My laughter dies. This is really going to happen. I’m frozen, a rabbit caught in the crosshairs. The crosshairs being a massive alien behind me and a deadly predator in front of me.

Reke stalks closer, keeping low to the ground. Outside the spotlight, his eyes glow softly and the rest of him is a little harder to see. He’s stalking his prey. He’s stalking me , and he’s using Venn to get what he wants.

An overwhelming rush of tingles and heat converge between my legs, and Venn moans low, as if he too can smell my desire.

Reke grasps the bars between us, standing to his full height so that he can stare straight into my eyes. “I told you to rub her.”