8. Colt

8

COLT

The moment a deputy dropped that Open Records request on my desk, dread had pooled in my gut. But fast on its heels had come anger—no, rage. People like Ridley didn’t have the first clue the kind of damage she could do with her bullshit questions and nosiness. They had never known what it was like to have a single moment rip your world apart.

It had done the most damage to Em, no question, but the rest of us hadn’t exactly made it out unscathed. Mom had held us so close after that, the fear creating fractures in her heart that had finally broken it altogether. My whole worldview had changed that day; everything seemed darker. I’d ditched my plan to open a bar with Trey and went to the academy instead. And that didn’t exactly help my perspective. Instead of seeing the best in humanity, I started to see the worst.

It didn’t matter how many people I helped, even the handful of lives I’d saved. Nothing could erase the guilt I felt. The knowledge that everything would’ve been different if I just would’ve been there when Emerson needed me, been there when I was supposed to be.

Twenty minutes past when I’d said I would be there to pick Em up from her obsessive tennis practice, I'd finally arrived. And when I got there, she’d simply been gone.

At first, I’d been pissed. Beyond annoyed she hadn’t texted to let me know that she’d gotten a ride with a friend and didn’t need me going out of my way to get her. And then I saw her duffel. The pink one with the sports company’s logo on the side and her name written in purple Sharpie on the strap. A panic unlike anything I’d ever known had set in.

My little sister, the one who’d come along from my mom’s second marriage, the surprise who’d taken to me instantly as if she believed I was the one who could keep her safe in this world, had vanished. No, vanished was the wrong word. She’d been taken. And it was my fucking fault.

“Your sister?” Ridley parroted as she gaped up at me as if I were some sort of alien who’d crash-landed on my sister’s front porch.

I was sure she was confused by the fact that we had different last names, but I didn’t give a damn. It only pissed me off more. As though the fact that we were half-siblings would make me care less somehow.

“My. Sister . Now get the hell off her property before I arrest you.”

“Colt,” Emerson said softly. “That’s not necessary.”

My gaze swung to her, and she snapped her mouth closed.

I turned back to Ridley, who still hadn’t moved. “What? You get some sort of sick charge out of harassing victims? Bringing up the worst moment in their lives and forcing them to relive it? You’re scum.”

Pain streaked across Ridley’s face. It was so vicious, I swore I could feel the fiery claws of it rake at my chest. But just as quickly as it appeared, it was gone, tucked away under a mask of nothingness.

I’d seen Emerson do something similar. Lock away the pain by tuning out the whole world around her. The masks were different, but a sudden twisted fear punched through me as I wondered if she’d been through something similar.

“Ridley—”

But then the fire was back, sparking through those blue eyes. “You don’t know a damn thing about me.” Her gaze jerked away as she tugged something from her pocket and handed it to my sister. “If you want to talk, you can reach me here. But no pressure. Only you know if you’re ready to go down that road. I’ll keep looking for the truth no matter what. Promise.”

That rage came flooding back, drowning out any worry for Ridley. I opened my mouth to tear into her yet again, but she was already jogging down the steps and toward that goddamned bike I couldn’t believe she’d ridden all the way out here. As furious as I was, I still couldn’t take my eyes off her as she climbed on and took off.

“Think you could’ve been any more of an ass?”

Emerson’s exasperated question tugged my gaze back to her. I could see a slight tremor in her hand as she gripped Bear’s collar. That kept the anger burning bright. “She doesn’t have any right to come up here, to shove all this back in your face.”

Em opened the door wider, finally releasing Bear, who ran to press up against me in search of pets. “Maybe, maybe not, but I can ask someone to leave if I want them to go. And if they don’t, I have pepper spray and the sheriff’s department on speed dial.”

I gaped at my sister. “You didn’t ask her to leave?”

Emerson nibbled on the corner of her lip. “I was going to, but there was something about her.”

“Yeah, probably that she’s a fucking con woman.” Ridley might not be stealing money out of grannies’ checking accounts, but that didn’t make her any less of a swindler. Instead, she made that money off others’ pain and suffering.

My sister was quiet for a moment, and the hairs on the back of my arms stood at attention.

“What?” I pressed.

Emerson swallowed as she looked down the road where Ridley had disappeared. “She said she thought I was the first in a string of twenty-three abductions. That I could help her find him.”

An invisible fist twisted in my stomach. Him. The bastard who had nearly torn my sister from me.

I knew from every law enforcement training I’d done that the chances of Emerson’s abduction being a one-off were slim to none. But in the months and years following, there hadn’t been a single abduction in the area that fit the profile. So I’d always figured that the unsub had changed his MO. But Emerson’s words had a niggle of doubt settling in.

“She was bluffing. Trying to get you to talk to her. I had a deputy look her up while I was on my way over here. She has one of those true-crime podcasts.” People obsessed with that sort of stuff only made law enforcement’s job harder. Sticking their noses in where they didn’t belong and mucking up cases.

“I don’t know. There was something about her. Something that said she cared. She was desperate almost.”

“Desperate for a big payday probably,” I muttered.

Emerson stared at me for a long moment, as if she was trying to recognize the person in front of her.

“Come on,” I said, ushering her inside. “I’ll make you some tea and check the security system, make sure the alerts on that camera out by the road ping my phone along with yours. I’ll know if she comes back. I don’t want you opening the door for her again.”

Emerson stopped in the entryway crowded with her various works of art, Bear weaving circles around us. “If you keep dealing with everything for me, I’ll never get stronger.”

A fresh wave of guilt swept through me, a more complex one. The kind that meant trip wires and land mines. Because I hadn’t realized until it was too late how Em’s world had gotten smaller and smaller, until she was terrified to leave the property at all. She wouldn’t even go outside unless Trey or I was here with her.

The therapist in town called it agoraphobia. Said it could be triggered by a traumatic event. Em had tried to keep up with seeing her, but it finally became too much, and she stopped going altogether. Em had finished all her high school credits online, even gotten a college degree in graphic design that way. Now she worked in the same field, one where all her work could be completed over the internet. I delivered her groceries and mail. Our local doctor even made house calls for her.

“I’m not dealing with everything,” I argued. “I’m dealing with people who could cause you harm.”

Emerson’s jaw hardened. “I’m not weak.”

I reared back. “I didn’t say you were.”

“Maybe not with your words. But your actions say it time and time again.”

Acid burned at her accusation. Just more pain I was dumping at my sister’s feet. More guilt making its home inside me. So deep I knew I’d never get it out. I hated that I’d hurt her. I'd never wanted to cause Emerson any more pain than she’d already endured. But I couldn’t seem to stop stepping in to protect her. Because her safety mattered more than anything. So I’d take that guilt and let it drown me just a little more. It was the least I could do to atone for not being there when she needed me most.