Chapter Fourteen WILLOW
I envy Iris’s ease while talking to Rhett. Like he doesn’t affect her whatsoever, and maybe he doesn’t. Actually, I know he doesn’t. He’s just another guy to her while to me, he’s …
I don’t know what he is, exactly, but I’m overwhelmed with a wave of unfamiliar emotion stealing over me, standing so close to him. I don’t know what to say or do, and I’m nervous. My palms are sweating and so are my underarms, and oh my God, do I smell? Can he smell me? I’m mortified. Fully freaking out and ready to make my escape—
Calm. Down.
The rational voice in my head sounds suspiciously like my mother and I’m grateful for it. I need it to remind me that I’m panicking for no good reason.
Taking a deep breath, I exhale softly, shaking out my hands to hopefully get rid of the sweat coating my palms. Hoping no one paid any attention to the minor meltdown I just had.
But when my gaze goes to Rhett, I see he’s watching me carefully, his focus on me despite the occasional yeah, and oh damn, he sends Iris’s way as he pretends to listen to her. All the while his focus is seemingly on me.
You okay?
He mouths the words to me and I nod, offering him a faint smile while my heart flutters wildly in my chest at his thoughtful concern.
“Are you two just going to stare at each other all night or are you finally going to give in to all of this sexual tension that’s currently swirling around us and do something about it?” Iris asks, as tactful as ever.
My face goes hot while Rhett just chuckles, the sexy sound settling into a low throb between my thighs. And my entire body lights up when he sends me a mysterious look, like we’re sharing a secret. I part my lips, ready to say something, but nothing comes out.
It’s as if I can’t form words. I can barely think. What is happening?
“Yo, Brooks!” Rhett suddenly shouts, his hand shooting up in the air to gain Brooks Crosby’s attention.
I’ve seen them hang around together, and I know Brooks is on the football team so maybe that’s why they’ve grown close. It’s an unusual pairing if you ask me only because I never thought Brooks was the overly athletic type, but Rhett seems to fit right in with everyone else on this campus, so I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised.
“Oh God.” Iris groans, flipping her hair over her shoulder in obvious disdain. She’s always had a love/hate relationship with Brooks. As in, she loves hating him. And I think he feels the same way about her.
Their moms were close friends when they were babies, but then the Crosbys divorced and it turned into this tense custody battle that messed with Brooks’s head since it dragged on for years. His mom eventually gave up and moved to Los Angeles to become a big shot talent agent while Brooks stayed here and lives with his dad and the nanny—aka the new Mrs. Crosby—when he’s not in school.
Yeah, it’s twisted like that in Brooks’s family, and he’s turned out relatively well-adjusted, considering.
“You don’t like Brooks?” Rhett asks Iris.
“I adore him, but I also hate him, and I’m fairly certain he feels the same way about me. We’ve known each other since we were in diapers,” Iris explains.
“He mentioned that.” Rhett rubs his chin, his lips curled into a mischievous smile. “Said you kicked him in the balls when you guys were hanging out in a playpen together.”
“That story is so exaggerated,” Iris drawls. “And how bad could I have damaged his balls anyway? He was wearing a diaper.”
We’re all laughing by the time Brooks is standing among us, and I can tell he’s worried just by the look on his face. “If you’re laughing about me, I’m out.”
“Oh, we were,” Iris declares with relish.
She really enjoys antagonizing him, the poor guy.
“And I’m out.” Brooks starts to leave, but Rhett stops him, gripping his arm tightly and keeping him in place. “Or maybe not.”
“I’m just joking, Brooksie,” Iris says with that familiar blithe smile. The one that should induce worry in all of us because we have no idea what she’s going to do or say next. “I didn’t mean to destroy your manhood when we were babies. I hope you’ve recuperated enough and everything is okay.”
She mock pouts, fluttering her eyelashes at him. Knowing all along her statement will rile him up.
“Destroy my manhood?” Brooks repeats, his dark brows shooting up.
Oh, here they go.
“Well, that’s what I’ve heard over the years. I always thought the story was an embellishment of the truth, but now I’m starting to wonder. Like maybe your manhood could be a little …” Her voice drops to just above a whisper. “Fragile.”
“What are you trying to say, Iris? Do you want to see my so-called manhood so I can prove to you that there’s nothing wrong with it?” Brooks’s hand drops to his crotch, where he cradles his junk in his palm and gives it a squeeze.
All Iris can do is laugh, shaking her head and waving her hands in a sure sign of denial.
“Jesus, Brooks. Please don’t whip your dick out in front of Willow,” Rhett mutters, his gaze going to mine, his expression apologetic. All I can do is smile weakly in return.
“Are you afraid you’ll have some competition?” Brooks taunts.
Rhett scoffs. “As if.”
Oh my God. Are we really talking about dick sizes right now?
There’s a shift in the air and the voices around us drop to a low murmur. As if they’re whispering about something. Or someone.
When I glance to my right, I realize they’re whispering about a couple of someones.
Silas and Alana, who appear to be in a somewhat heated argument.
Even the conversation among the four of us dies, our attention going to Lancaster Prep’s most popular couple, who seem to be engrossed in their own little world. Their mouths are moving constantly as they attempt to talk over each other, Silas’s expression grim while Alana’s is full-fledged anger.
I’ve known her long enough to recognize her emotions. She is definitely not pleased with whatever it is they’re talking about.
“Ooh, Alana looks pissed,” Iris says gleefully.
“You sound happy about it.” My tone is faintly chastising and I can’t help it. Maybe I should be glad Alana is arguing with Silas too, but she’s been my friend for years, and I can’t help but feel bad seeing her in distress.
“She deserves whatever grief Silas brings her,” Iris retorts.
“Maybe she’s giving him grief.”
“Ugh, stop defending him, Willow. It’s getting old.” Iris rolls her eyes.
Her words don’t even bother me because, deep down, she’s right. I should absolutely stop rushing to his defense.
“You want to be friends with her? Then go for it! But I refuse to just stand by and watch you two get close. You know how she feels about you,” Alana suddenly yells, loud enough for all of us to hear.
For me to hear, because that statement feels directed right at me.
“It’s not like that, Alana. Come on—”
Before Silas can say anything else, she’s stomping away from him, tears streaming down her cheeks. Silas watches her go, his hands cupped around the back of his head, arms akimbo.
“Fuck!” he yells, dropping his arms at his sides, glancing over at us.
At me.
I look away first, turning my attention to Iris to find she’s already staring at me.
“Sounds like they were fighting about you,” she murmurs.
“You really think so?” I’m hoping she’ll say no.
“Um, yes.” She grabs hold of my arm and steers me away from Rhett and Brooks, practically dragging me away from the crowd so we can have a chat. Everyone’s started talking again and music begins to play, a popular song blasting at top volume from an invisible speaker. “Tell me what you’re thinking right now.”
I’m frowning at my cousin, confused. “I think the question is, what are you thinking?”
“After hearing their argument, I’m guessing Silas did like you, and Alana swooped in and snagged him up. Buuuuttt …” She drawls the word out, tapping her index finger against her pursed lips. “If he really is sitting around thinking about you and talking about you to his freaking girlfriend, maybe he was just settling for Alana. Now that you’re back, he’s realized his mistake.”
I don’t feel a single spark of hope at her words. “I don’t want to be the cause of their fights or eventual breakup.”
“I don’t think you have much choice. Looks like you already are.” Iris shrugs. “Maybe you should go for it.”
“Iris!”
“Willow! I’m being serious.”
“I can’t.” I shake my head, dread filling me at the mere thought.
“Why not? What’s stopping you?”
“Alana is—was our friend.”
“That didn’t matter to her,” Iris points out.
True. “And I don’t think I like him like that anymore.”
“You’ve never been one to turn off your feelings so quickly, Willow. I know you. Besides, that’s usually my job.” Iris smiles, trying to make light of the moment, but I’m not feeling it.
Glancing over at where the boys still stand, I study Rhett for a moment, smiling faintly when he slaps Brooks’s chest with the back of his hand and they both start chuckling. I like that he doesn’t seem to take things too seriously, but does that mean he’s never serious? Like when it comes to girls?
Like would he really want to be with me if anything was ever to … start between us?
Maybe I’m just being hopeful. I’m basing my interest in Rhett on nothing but physical chemistry and that’s not how solid relationships start. We should know each other better first. Chemistry just fizzles out eventually if you’re not truly compatible.
And I know Silas and I were compatible at one point. We’ve been friendly for a while. Actual friends, though I always, always wished for more.
“I think it’s a terrible idea …” My voice drifts and I startle when I feel fingers graze my arm. I glance over my shoulder to find Silas standing there.
God, did he hear our conversation? I will die of mortification if he did.
“Hey, Willow.” He smiles, but it’s uneasy. I’m sure he’s not thrilled that we all just witnessed that argument between him and Alana.
“Hi,” I squeak, clearing my throat.
“Can you talk for a minute? I don’t mean to interrupt.” His gaze shifts to Iris.
“You two go ahead and chat all you want. I’m out of here.” Iris pats my shoulder before she takes off, heading back toward Brooks and Rhett.
My heart pangs when she leaves. As I watch her approach the boys. How they smile in greeting at her and how she practically throws herself at Brooks and then just as quickly shoves him away, laughing. She’s got her back to him and I note the way Brooks watches her with longing, his expression shifting into neutral when she turns to face him once more.
Hmmm.
“You sure you want to talk? Or would you rather hang out with them?”
I turn at the faint hostility in Silas’s voice, frowning at him. His expression evens out, just like Brooks’s did only moments ago, and I immediately find it off-putting.
And I never find Silas off-putting.
“I told you we could talk, so let’s do it.” I smile at him and he smiles in return, obviously pleased.
He reaches for me, his hand cupping my elbow as he steers me away from my cousin and the boys. I glance over my shoulder one last time, my gaze meeting Rhett’s, and my heart drops at the look on his face. Realization strikes the further Silas escorts me away from them.
This was a huge mistake.