Chapter 13

CHAPTER 13

LUNA

A ll weekend and into the beginning of the next week, we'd worked on the wood floors in Axel's house. In our spare time, we were naked. I enjoyed every minute of it, but I was neglecting my actual job. Tonight, I told Axel I needed time to catch up.

I got lost in my to-do list: checking emails, returning calls, and sending out estimates and schedules. When Dad called, there was a crick in my neck from leaning over the laptop.

I yawned before I answered, “Hey, Dad.”

“What are you doing?”

I stretched my neck from side to side, trying to work out the kinks. “Working. Catching up on emails and calls.”

Dad cleared his throat. “Mom said you've been behind.”

I sighed. “Yeah, I'm trying to enjoy my time here, see some sights.”

“As long as your work is getting done.” His tone was chiding.

“Don't worry. It is.” I should tell him about my plan for design services. “I know you said you weren't sure about combining construction with design?—”

“I told you we'd think about it.”

My stomach tightened. “Yeah, but it's been over a year since I initially mentioned it.”

“I don't think our customers need that service. They already know what they want.”

“Not all of them, and they find someone else to do it for them.” Frustration crept up my spine.

“You can't know that. I don't want to spread ourselves too thin.”

My heart was pounding. I rarely did something like this on my own. “I offered my services to a few clients, and they said yes.”

Dad was quiet for so long I checked to see if he'd hung up.

“I don't like that.”

My face flushed. “Why?”

“I don't want you bugging the clients, trying to sell them something. They come to us for construction. That's what we do.”

Dad was so set in his ways.

“I'm only talking about the clients who ask if we offer a design service. I said the company doesn't, but that I'm starting my own.”

“How do you think that looks? My daughter peddling a service to my clients on the side?”

My shoulders lowered. “I don't think they know I'm your daughter necessarily.”

“In this town?”

“Don't you think I should get the business over someone else?”

“I don't like mixing the two,” Dad grumbled.

I blew out a breath. “I'll continue working for you, but I'm going to start this business on the side. I won't say anything to the customers when I call them, but I'm going to market it.”

“Why are you insisting on this?” Dad asked.

“Because I need to do something else. You've never let me work in the business the way I want to.”

“We've talked about this. Your brothers do the construction.”

“Why can't I? Is it because I'm a girl?” I asked, irritation making me bold.

“We need someone in the office.”

“And it has to be me?” When he didn't answer, I continued, “I'll stay while I get my business off the ground, but I think you should look at other options for your administrative issues.”

“You can't be serious.”

It was outside of my dad's understanding why I'd ever want to work somewhere else. “I've saved some. Maybe it's time for me to buy a place and try my hand at some renovations.” Working with Axel had made me realize it was something I could do. And we were learning new skills sanding and staining the wood floors.

“I didn't realize you were so unhappy.”

“I have a different vision for working for the company than you do, and I'm realizing that they're not ever going to line up.”

Dad sighed. “I told you to give me time.”

“That's time I could use to build my own business. Once it's successful, maybe you'll see that I was right. Our customers want this service.” I was the one who handled the calls. By the time Dad or one of my brothers showed up to see the space, the clients had already secured someone to do the design for them.

We were missing out on a good opportunity to offer our customers more service.

“Is this why you left?” Dad asked, his voice gruff.

“That was Rex. He cheated on me, and I wanted to get out of town.” I didn't want to stick around and hear the rumors and jokes. That I couldn't get a man to stay interested in me. That there was something inherently wrong with me.

“You're coming home for the holidays?” Dad asked.

“That's the plan.” He hadn't really said anything about me leaving work. I wondered if he even believed me.

“We'll see you then.”

I sighed as I said goodbye. Did my family not take me seriously? I didn't want to leave him and the business in the lurch, but he didn't even seem concerned.

I worked through the rest of my emails and then turned my attention to what I needed to do for my business. A website, pictures of work completed. Should I start a social media page where I documented my work? Then I lost time researching similar businesses online.

Social media presence seemed mandatory. I could do it. This could be fun. Axel's cabin was the starting point for what would be an amazing career move, and I had him to thank. If he hadn't encouraged me, I might still be stuck as the receptionist at my dad's office, never believing I could do anything more.

My exes certainly hadn't encouraged me. They thought I had it good. An easy job because of my last name.

But they didn't see what I did. My brothers would take over the business. There wouldn't be room for me. I had to create my own niche, and I didn't know any other designers who were on the island. Maybe I could draw people in by saying I only worked on the island.

I took notes and brainstormed ideas for what I could do for marketing. I'd promised myself I wouldn't go over to Axel's tonight. I could stay away for one night. I didn't need to feel him inside of me every day.

I totally wanted to, but I wouldn't. I had to prove that I could be away from him. Otherwise, how would I ever leave? Especially when I was building a business in another state.

I closed my laptop and went in search of food. I hadn't actually cooked in days because Axel usually took care of it. I threw together a sandwich and had just finished when there was a pounding on my door.

Worried that Axel was hurt or needed me, I raced to the front door and opened it without looking to see who it was.

Before I could register what was going on, Axel lifted me, shutting the door behind him. “I missed you.”

“It was only a few hours,” I said from my upside-down position over his shoulder. My voice was shaking from the bumping as he marched to my bedroom and threw me down on the bed.

“I can't go without you for a few hours.” Before I could respond, he was on top of me, kissing me and grabbing at my clothes. I helped him peel off my clothes, and he managed to shove his pants down far enough to free his cock and slide home.

I whimpered when he seated himself inside me to the hilt. “You feel so good.”

“Yeah, I do,” he said as he kissed me, his mouth insistent on mine.

He wanted me. He couldn't last a few hours without me. I hoped it wasn't just the physical that he liked spending time with me. But then again, we worked together, side-by-side, talking and laughing. It was more than just sex even if he'd acted like a caveman carrying me to my bedroom to fuck me.

He was easing in and out in a slow, methodical pace, but I wanted more. “Axel.”

“I'm right here with you.” He pulled out long enough to remove his pants. Then he was back inside me.

He angled one leg to the side so he could press himself deeper. I hoped I didn't forget what it felt like for him to possess me like this, the possessive way he held me, the caveman way he handled me. Like I was the only thing in this world that mattered to him.

I'd had a few doubts like he was distracting himself with me so he wouldn't have to deal with his family. But I hoped I meant more to him than that.

When we came together, his forehead rested against mine. “I meant to ask if you wanted to eat.”

I laughed. “You picked me up and took me to bed.”

He chuckled with me, then kissed me soundly on the mouth. “That was my intention, but when I saw you in the doorway, I couldn't help myself.

Tingles erupted over my skin. I loved that he couldn't control himself around me. It was intoxicating. He was good for my ego and food for my soul.

Oh, shit, I was falling for him. And there was nothing I could do to stop it. Not when he was living next door, and he couldn't resist spending every spare moment with me.

I didn't stand a chance against him. I couldn't resist him. He was all I wanted and more. It was too bad our life circumstances didn't match up outside of these few weeks.

He rolled us so that I was on top of him, and his hand was stroking the skin on my back. I never wanted to move.

“How far did you get on the floors?”

“The living room is done. Bedroom's up next.”

I kissed his chest, happiness filling mine. “I like working with you.”

Axel played absently with the strands of my hair. “It's fun. We should flip houses together.”

I laughed. “That would be crazy.” And impossible, right? There was no way that would work. “You live in Maryland, and I live in Florida. That's where our friends and family are.”

“Yeah, that's too bad. I could see myself doing this. We could fix up a home, then move onto the next one.”

It was a nice idea. “What about my design business?”

“You could do it on the side.”

I shifted so that I was lying to the side of him. “I think I need to do this on my own. I've always worked with my family. I need to prove that I can do this myself.”

Axel cleared his throat. “No. Yeah. That makes sense. It was just a thought.”

He'd said it was okay, but he was tense. I wondered if he wanted more from our relationship, something past these few weeks, and I'd just unwittingly turned him down.

But he couldn't be serious about going into business together. We'd only just met. He was just being nice. “Are you still hungry? You said you came over here for food.”

His stomach let out a big rumble, and we both laughed.

I cleaned up, then threw on a shirt and panties before wandering into the kitchen where Axel was already throwing a sandwich together. I tried to forget about what he'd said, but his offer lingered in my head. I couldn't figure out if he was serious about it, or it was just a spur-of-the-moment idea.

I'd wanted to prove that I could spend the night by myself, but he hadn't been able to spend the evening apart either. He was feeling exactly how I was. It was comforting, but it made me more anxious for when I'd need to leave.

“My dad called before I came over here,” Axel said when he set his sandwich on a plate and poured a glass of water.

“Oh? What did he want?” I asked, my nerves picking up a bit. Would he want him to come home now? I was unclear on Axel's family situation, but would he stay with his family for the holidays? I didn’t want this thing between us to be over, and I wasn't just talking about our planned renovations for his cabin.

“What everyone in my family wants to know. When I'm coming home.” Axel set his sandwich to the side as if he couldn't stomach eating during the relay of his conversation with his dad.

I sucked in a breath. “What did you say?”

“That I'm waiting on the paperwork to go through.”

The dinner I'd eaten felt like a rock in my stomach. “But that's not true.”

“I don't feel great about lying to them, but I'm not ready to say I'm back. They'll want to spend time with me. I know it sounds bad. I want to see my family, but I feel this pressure to be a certain way, and I'm not good at these things.”

I moved to his side but didn't touch him. “Good at what exactly?”

“Interacting with other people. I feel this pressure to react a certain way. Like I should be happy to be home or grateful or something. I see all these emotions on my sisters' faces, but I don't feel the same.”

I frowned. “Are you saying you don't miss your family?”

Axel braced his hands on the counter. “I'm not saying that. I miss seeing them. I have fun when I'm with them. For the most part. But there's this heavy weight of expectation, where I sense that I'm supposed to be feeling a certain way, and I don't.”

I wasn't exactly sure what he meant. “I don't think there's anything wrong with the way you feel. You shouldn't have to think a certain way because someone else does.” I was a bit worried he'd feel this way about me. That he'd sense how strong my feelings for him were, and he'd be pressured to reciprocate. I didn't want that to be the case.

Maybe he was incapable of feeling things for others. Or it was all in his head, and he just didn't feel things as intensely as his family.

How would I feel if he hadn't used his leave to see me and the rest of the family? That would hurt.

He nodded, then shifted so that he wasn't bracing his hands on the counter anymore. “I'm not sure they feel the same.”

“They're going to be hurt if they find out you've been home all this time but didn't tell them. But I think they'll understand if you said you needed time to decompress.”

“I hope so.” He took a large bite of his sandwich.

Was he someone who didn't feel things, or was he keeping them buried so deep he didn't even realize they were there? Either way, it didn't bode well for a relationship. It was probably a good thing that this was temporary.

Axel might not be capable of giving me what I needed. The entire time he'd kind of said that. We were just having fun. This was a fling. Neither one of us expressed desire for more, and if we did, it wouldn't be possible with his family here and mine in Florida.

I moved behind him and wrapped my arms around his body. He was tense at first, but then he softened, covering one of my hands with his. Then he turned so that he was facing me, cupping my cheek. “How are you so understanding?”

I shrugged. “I think anyone would be. You're going through a big thing. You identified as someone for the past ten years, and now you have to find out who you are now. Who you want to be. It's a tall order.”

Axel sighed, his fingers along my jaw. “Maybe you're right. But I can't avoid them forever.”

I had this sense that when he went to see his parents, that would be the end of us. He kept me separate from them, so it stood to reason that he'd drop me when he told his family he was home. He felt like he couldn't have both.

But that was just an assumption. I was probably worried about nothing. Not that it mattered, when I was leaving for the holidays too. I had to remember this thing had an end date, and no matter how good the sex was, or how much I felt for him, that didn't mean we had a future beyond December.

Axel dropped his hand to finish his sandwich. Then he cleaned up his plate and washed his hands. “Come on. Let's take a shower together,”

I took his offered hand, promising myself not to worry about the future. There was only the here and now.