Chapter 9

CHAPTER 9

brEKKER

A ileen is light as a feather and just as soft in my arms. While she's well-muscled, I worry that she hasn't received adequate nutrition on her station.

"You need to eat," I growl. Leaves and pine needles crunch under my boots, the forest birds and animals growing quiet at the apex predator in their midst.

Me.

"I'm okay," she says. Her eyes are as wide and luminous as the moon herself, and she glances around with an awestruck expression that fills me with pride. "I've never seen anything like this," she murmurs.

"What was it like on the station? You grew up there?" I want to know everything about her.

I don't like that I know nothing about Aileen.

She's mine. Mine.

I should know all there is about her, every last drop of who she is and what's made her that way.

She fidgets slightly, her eyes still wide in disbelief as she soaks up the forest and the lodge. Then her gaze lands on me.

"It was… small." A small laugh punctuates the remark. "It felt big when I was younger. Like I could get swallowed up by all the different species that lived there and no one would be any the wiser that I was gone. It smelled… like metal. All the time." Her nostrils flare as she inhales, her eyelids fluttering shut. Miniscule veins crisscross through the delicate skin there. I'm just as captivated by them as I am by everything else about her.

"Metal and sweat and the Oolasag mucin." Her nose wrinkles, and she opens her eyes again. "I'll never forget the Oolasag smell."

"They do smell strange," I admit with a laugh. "What does it smell like here?"

"Fresh. Earthy." She inhales again, like she can pick out every different strain if she tries hard enough. "You smell good. Really good."

Pride raises the hair on my head, and she blinks at me in surprise. "What's that?"

"It's just a reaction," I tell her with another laugh.

I don't remember the last time I laughed this much, the last time I felt free enough to. But here, with her, in the woods, that mantle of responsibility I've worn for so long slowly melts away.

Who am I without it?

"The station was always busy. The only light was artificial." She raises a hand, marveling at the way the shadows of the leaves overhead play across it. "The days never ended, you know?"

I nod. "I've been on a few stations."

"All the species kept different time. The nocturnal, diurnal, all keep to their normal schedules. Most places were open all the time. It felt… like one endless day rolling into the next." She bites her lip, and I want to chase her teeth away with my tongue.

"It will be night here soon," I offer as she falls silent. I want to hear her talk more. Her musical voice, so different from the harsh Wulfric tones I'm used to, soothes something deep in my soul, an ache I didn't even know I had. "The nights are long on Wulfric. The moon is worth worshipping."

She's watching me, her expression so open and sincere it's as if I've dipped my too-hot body into the most refreshing cold spring.

"The hottest period of the day here is called the Hallec. Most of us try to sleep through it." I approach the enormous door, carved in traditional Wulfric fashion, and balance her against my body to tug it open.

"The Hallec," she repeats, eyes tracking the carvings in fascination. "I noticed these in the other room, too. These door carvings. They're similar, aren't they?"

She is a good little mate already. Smart, observant.

I wonder at it, at how well-suited she seems for me. I make a mental note to thank Tessa again for choosing her.

"They are similar," I agree. I take the opportunity to pull her even closer as I point at the different tableaus carved on the door and the frame. "They tell the story of our people. It's traditional—to have the wood carvings."

"The past is important to the Wulfric," she says, her fingers skating over the wood. Her eyes narrow, and she glances up at me. "I don't have a past. Not like this. None of us humans do, not anymore. Our planet… everyone knows what happened to it." She squirms against me, and I set her down, though all I want to do is hold her tightly as she works through her distress.

Delicate fingertips rub the worn wood of the wolf's head that forms the knob of the door. "Why did you choose me?"

My throat tightens.

I want to pull her close to me again, replace her questions with her moans of pleasure.

"No Wulfric would have me."

She nods, eyes still narrowed. "Why?"

"For a creature as fragile as you are, you certainly do not back down from a challenge."

"Why did you have to marry a human?"

I shift uneasily. "Have I done something to offend you?" The stripe of hair that runs across my head and down the back of my neck prickles as it stands on end.

"Tell me the truth." Aileen doesn't blink, holding herself tall and still as she takes my measure, as she roots to the very heart of the problem.

Me.

"I carry… a genetic marker that means my offspring could be—" I swallow hard, squeezing my eyes shut.

Her small, warm hand fits over mine.

I force myself to open my eyes. "No other Wulfric would have me. Our young could be monsters of the worst sort."

Her smile turns sad, but she doesn't pull away, not even now that she knows the truth. I am a monster. I have the ability to make monsters, and I am unfit for any wife of my species.

"You were the last resort of a sister who loves me more than I deserve."

My eyes dart between hers, and to my surprise, she doesn't flinch away or sneer at me. There's nothing but empathy radiating from her.

Her arms wrap around me as best as they can.

All my muscles go tense at the unexpected contact, at the unexpected generosity of her embrace.

"If your sister loves you enough to risk your… clan's approval… for your happiness, then you must be deserving of it." Her mouth stumbles over the word clan, and I blink in surprise.

She means to comfort me, I belatedly realize.

Slowly, afraid of startling her, I bring my arms around her, too.

My eyes close, and I settle my cheek on the top of her head, breathing her in.

"My sister deserves a much better brother than I. But I can't deny how grateful I am that she brought you to me."

I feel her face twitch with her smile.

It echoes through my heart.