Chapter 7

After another two days and

nights of similar feelings and efforts having been made, Edward

felt like he had no choice but to assume that Alessandra had no

desire to marry him. He spoke to his mother privately about it.

"Edward, you must be patient,"

she responded to her son's words of sadness.

"Mother, can you not see

that she does not want to even be around me?" Edward replied,

feeling defeated. "You know as well as I do that I am not handsome,

and I do not believe I am the kind of man that she

wants."

His mother looked at him,

distressed at the declaration that his self-esteem was being

lowered by the discomfort of the young lady she had chosen for

him.

"Please give her one more

day. If she does not soften after another day, I will talk to her

and find out what she is thinking," she said, trying to put his

mind at rest.

"Yes, Mother," Edward replied

sadly. He didn't relish the thought of continuing his efforts for

another day or so, only to be rejected again and again.

~~~~~

After dinner that

evening, the family again gathered together in the drawing room.

Edward and Alessandra sat close to each other at one end of the

room, while their parents settled at the other. He looked again at

the blushing and flustered young woman in front of him. It seemed

pointless to put in any effort, but he did have determination

inside of him, knowing how much it would please his

parents.

"Alessandra," he said quietly

to her, wanting so much for her to look at him.

At the sound of him

saying her name so intimately, Alessandra dared to raise her eyes

and look at him.

"Yes?"

"If you do not wish for

this marriage, it is quite alright," Edward said. "My parents will

not force it."

As soon as he said the

words, he saw a brief look of alarm on Alessandra's face. He also

saw worry and a deep blush appear over her skin before she looked

down again, and she appeared lost to him once more. At that point,

he was ready to give up completely. If they couldn't even talk to

each other, how likely was it that they could go on to have a happy

life together?

The evening passed. That

night in bed, Alessandra felt ashamed at herself for having let her

nerves take over so much. Because of her embarrassment, Edward was

ready to cancel the arrangement that could otherwise have been

suitable for them both, if only she could have done better in her

efforts to be friendly. With that thought on her mind, she finally

went to sleep, determined to make a better effort the following

morning.

~~~~~

In his room,

Edward stood in front of his looking glass, understanding why

Alessandra did not want to know him. He'd never felt he was

handsome, but the level of her not wanting to talk to him, was

taking him to a new level of dislike for himself and what he looked

like. He felt caught in a horrible place, wanting to do the right

thing for his mother, but wondering at what point he should stop

doing that and consider what was right for him .