Chapter 10

Chapter Ten

Mara

"Are you sure you want that, Mara?" he asks.

"I'm not afraid of you. I'm not afraid of you human and I'm not afraid of you wolf." I know that isn't what he means at all. I know he's talking about being older than me. I'm hoping my intentionally misinterpreting him will make it clear that I think that's ludicrous."

"That's not what I'm saying. I mean."

"I know what you mean. Shut up. Stop asking me like I'm a child. If I'm old enough for you to stick your dick in one of my holes, I'm old enough to make decisions about my own life." Wow. Holy moly. I'm never this… um…

Bitchy.

Bitchy, I guess.

"I don't think you…"

"You're damned right you don't think. You don't think correctly, anyway. You spend all day every day in your fucking head and you decide how I must feel, what I must want, and what I do or don't understand. You treat every orgasm like something you ought to feel guilty about. You're a fucking idiot."

"I'm just trying to…"

"You're trying to be some noble, self-sacrificing hero. You're a fucking idiot." I turn away and he starts to go after me but right then, a police officer calls him. He can't follow me but before I walk away, I say, "And the shifter lifespan is very long. You're going to outlive me, which kind of makes your whole argument about the age gap stupid as fuck, too."

Then I walk away.

I feel like I'm in a dream and not in real life. I don't know how to explain it but I see a police car heading down the street and ask if he's going down off the mountain. He is. "My ride will be stuck here a while because he's…"

"I know who he is and what he did," the officer says. He's a little older than me and very respectful in tone. "And I know what you did, too, Ma'am."

I blush a little and say, "If you could drive me far enough to where I can call for a taxi or a rideshare, that would be great."

"I'll drive you all the way home," he says, "even if home is three states away. My girlfriend's little brother was on that bus." An hour and a half later, I wave goodbye to him as he pulls out of my driveway. I feel strong, you know. I feel like I stood my ground and called Jonah out on his damned obsession about our age gap.

I'm strong.

Powerful.

I'm a woman who knows what she wants and isn't afraid to make it clear.

Yeah, until I get through the door.

Once I'm through the door, I collapse onto the floor crying like a baby. All of my bluster and strength disappear out the window. I mean, it's all-out ugly crying. It's crazy to think that I saw him become a wolf and then helped him save all those kids but then had all of this happen.

I cry for about a half hour before I finally lift myself to my feet and make my way to my bedroom. I want to just collapse onto my bed but I force myself to take a shower first. It's a smart move. I go from desolate and devastated to numb.

Numb feels better.

Well, it doesn't feel at all, and that's the point. I'm about to crawl into the bed but I don't want to. I decide to go to the office instead. I can lose myself in work and get some things organized I've been putting off. My parents' filing system was very poorly designed, and I've been waiting for a chance to fix it.

Now's a good time.

Hell, now is a good time for anything that distracts me.

I get dressed slowly, trying to focus on the work ahead of me and not the dumb shifter firefighter idiot I left behind. Fuck, why doesn't he just grow up? Who the fuck is going to care about some stupid age difference if we don't care?

I get to the door still doing a miserable job of letting things go. "I mean, I certainly don't give a flying fuck how old anyone is!" I spit out as I open the door.

"Well, doesn't that just make things so easy for you?"

It's Jonah. He's standing there on the porch as I swing the door open and, well, justify myself to myself, out loud. Being caught out like that does not help my mood. His words don't help it much either. "You know, Jonah, I'm trying to just work this out, okay?"

"Oh no, you've already figured it all out for yourself," he says, "and you can't fucking handle anyone else still needing to figure it out." He throws up his hands. "Well, running away like a little child doesn't do much to support your theory that our age gap doesn't matter."

I'm just caught so off guard by his anger, I lash out at him. "I think, Jonah, that you use our age gap as a stupid excuse to set me aside. Everything about me you can just discount, my dreams, ambitions, emotions, desires, everything can be deposited in this little box you've made for me."

He's taken aback, I can tell. Naturally, that gives me fuel for my fire. "Like when I'm pissed you say I'm running away like a little child instead of an adult removing herself from a toxic moment."

He breathes in to say something so I hurry to keep going. "It's easier to see me as just some naive little girl who couldn't possibly know what she wants or really, what's good for her. That way, you can discount my thoughts and my ideas. You can act like a father to guide me instead of a boyfriend to love me. In charge, you get. In love terrifies you."

He starts to talk but he makes a kind of monosyllabic something or other before I've waved any response away from him. "But you know what, I'm tired of it. You want to think I'm mad right now because I'm young and don't know any better than to be mad about what I don't understand."

I say bitterly, "And you're such an asshole because you're sure there's so fucking much that I don't understand. I could somehow graduate magna cum laude at damned competitive business skill and be trusted to run a fourth-generation business instead of my brother but I'm just a child. I don't have real thoughts."

I feel the tears forming and I don't want him to see me cry. "So, just leave Jonah."

He stands there. "Mara, I don't . . ."

I sigh. "That's right, Jonah, you don't. You don't look past a silly thing like our age difference because you only see how things reflect on you. So, if I'm sad or glad or mad, it's just being young. I'm never me. I'm never Mara in your eyes. You can't get past you, Jonah. You get to have real feelings. Not me. You're just too damn selfish to realize our relationship involves me, too."

I want to hit him, push him, hug him, cry with him. I can't do any of those things. I can't even scream at him. I can barely gather the energy to say what I know I need to say. "Jonah, just get off my porch until you can act like a fucking adult."

"Fine!"

My heart stops as I hear his response. I can't even look at him anymore.

But his hand darts into my view and I slowly understand what I'm staring at. It's an open box and it's holding the most beautiful ring I've ever seen. My eyes shoot up to his face.

"Satisfied?" He asks."How about before you tear me a new one you give me a chance to fucking talk?"

"Oh, do young people just force their thoughts out? Is that it? Is it just Mara being childish?"

"Damn it all to hell, Mara, are you going to fucking marry me or are you going to fucking scream at me?" He yells this, and then we both just stare at each other

I start laughing first but then we both can't stop. "Yes, yes," I answer, wheezing as tears fill my eyes. Am I crying? Am I laughing? Does it fucking matter?

"Fuck, Jonah." I'm in his arms now, and we're clinging to each other like the lightest breeze will rip us away from this moment. "This has got to be the worst proposal story ever. We can't tell anyone this story. We especially can't tell our kids. You need to promise you'll never tell them this is how it happened."

He stops laughing, "Kids?"

I step back, shaking my head. "Idiot, how do you manage to focus on just one word out of twenty? Yes! Kids, or, uh, pups? Cubs? I don't know what the hell you're going to call them. Get off the fucking porch, get your clothes off, and let's get started on making them."

"How many do you want?"

I take his face in my hands and kiss him. "It doesn't matter. Now, shut up and come to bed."

He smiles and nods. "Yes, ma'am."

"Whoa, I want you to think age is of no importance, but Ma'am? Really?"

He pulls me inside and shuts the door. "I am at your bidding my sweet princess. Is that better?"

"A little. Now take me to my chambers and ravish me."

He sweeps me up into his arms. "You know, I think I like being domesticated."

"What?"

He laughs and kisses me. "Oh, nothing. Let's go, wifey to be."

As we undress our way to the bedroom, he has trouble keeping himself from laughing. It's hilarious and wonderful because he's being the childish one.

And it's the best fucking thing in the world!

Did you enjoy reading Age Gap Wolf's Second Chance Mate ? I hope so. I really enjoy writing about the Company 417 firemen shifters. You already know that if you've read any of the other books I've written. I'm definitely a shifter-loving girl. I don't just have book boyfriends. I have a menagerie full of them! Bears, wolves, lions, tigers, and those giant majestic dragons!

I loved writing about Jonah. I think every girl can go for a sexy fireman, right? With Jonah, Mara gets a very sexy and very exciting older man. She's not going to lose him this time, either. This very sweet and very strong, confident, and sexy girl is in for an exciting and wonderful life, I think.

I just love how she confronted him about his age gap worries. How about you? What did you like about the characters?

Naturally, I fell in love with Jonah while I wrote this. That isn't going to surprise any of you out there who've read my other Company 417 books. I fall in love with every sexy shifter leading man I write! I can't help it and I always imagine I'm the girl, too. Let's face reality here: I'm absolutely hopeless. I guess that's just me. I really hope you enjoyed reading about Mara and her wolf. These two have a really sweet and sexy happily ever after in their future, don't they?

I'll tell you one thing right now. I could go for that kind of happily ever after!

If you enjoyed this story, then I think you'll love the next one.

Toni Vance is in trouble. A blind date with a guy didn't work out at all. Now, Maxwell is scaring her. The whole situation has turned into something terrifying. Vance Martin, her fireman neighbor can tell something's wrong. When she explains what's happening, he decides he's going to help. He discovers early on that Toni's in more trouble than she thinks. Maxwell is a wolf shifter from a pack that believes human women are to be taken, kept, and bred regardless of how they feel about it.

But Vance isn't going to let that happen. Vance isn't afraid of wolf shifters or any other shifter. He's not just a fireman. Toni's going to discover something pretty powerful. This curvy girl is going to learn that Vance is a tiger, and when he decides to be protective, nobody better get in his way!

Find out all about it in Protective Tiger's Curvy Girl Crush , the next exciting tale in the sexy, steamy age gap shifter firefighter romance series Company 417 Fireman Shifters !