Chapter Twenty-Seven

Maybe he'd made a mistake by taking Lucas here, but Jordan didn't think so. The usual construction and tractor trailers hampered the drive into Brooklyn, but for once, he didn't let it bother him. They'd had a nice lunch at one of their favorite cafés in Chelsea, and after expecting to spend the day alone with only the dog, having Lucas home early was a bonus.

Lucas's warm hand covered his as he gripped the steering wheel. "You okay? You're so quiet."

Jordan's mouth quirked up in a smile. "Hey, I can be deep sometimes." His smile faded. "I was thinking of Johnny and all that he's going to face in the coming months."

Jerry had called during lunch and said the information Johnny had given them was going to help them to get a better handle on this Donovan person. It seems he'd originated outside of Philly and only came to New York around a year ago, but brought his people with him to expand his little operation. To look at the man, you'd never know he was a monster who used kids to do his dirty work. He was older and wore an aura of respectability around him as a businessman in the community. In fact, he owned a diner in downtown Brooklyn, and according to Johnny, that's where he ran his business. Jerry promised that Johnny would in no way be connected to anything that went down.

"I'm glad you're getting the kid some help. Working with Wanda and in Drew's clinic will help him. Maybe he'll even get his GED."

Traffic started moving again, and Jordan made the turn into Greenwood Cemetery. The cemetery itself had become somewhat of a tourist attraction since many famous people were buried here, and Jordan had a bit of trouble finding a parking spot. Finally, he parked the SUV and they walked down the grassy path together. Keith's was a simple monument—a gray granite headstone with his name, dates of birth and death, and the phrase, FOREVER IN OUR HEARTS.

Jordan knew Keith would never have wanted any mention of dying a hero or anything ostentatious or flowery. Lucas took the bouquet of lilies they'd brought and laid it on the bench nearby, then stepped back.

"Do you want some time alone? I can wait over by the path."

There was sorrow and not a little pain in Lucas's beautiful hazel eyes. Jordan held out his hand, and after a slight hesitation, Lucas took it.

"I've had enough moments alone to last me a lifetime. Over the past year, I wondered how it was possible for me to be surrounded by people yet be so impossibly lonely. Every day I died a little bit more, wanting what I could no longer have and pushing away everyone who loved me."

He took both of Lucas's hands in his. "I wanted you here with me because Keith should see I'm happy and recovered." Lucas tightened his grip on Jordan's hands. "I've learned to be a survivor, and it taught me that no matter how hard the fight, it's afterward that the real work begins."

"You're much stronger than I ever imagined when we first met. Whenever Keith spoke about you, I thought you were a pretty, rich snob, and I always wondered what he saw in you. He told me of your generous spirit and kind heart, but I guess I didn't believe him." Lucas rubbed his thumb over Jordan's fingers. "I prejudged you on your looks and background, and I was wrong. You surprised me."

"I surprised myself," admitted Jordan. He searched Lucas's face. "You became my strength. Even when I pushed you away, you came back at me, refusing to let me wallow and drown in self-pity. I owe my life to you." Jordan walked over to Keith's headstone and dropped to his knees. He ran his hand over the carved letters. "I loved you hard and with everything I had, babe, but it's not fair to Lucas. It's time I let you go. Let go of the past."

"No." Lucas knelt beside him. "You don't need to forget the past in order to live the future. Before I met and fell in love with you, I never believed I'd find love, or deserved it. I have no doubts about you or us and the commitment we have to each other. Even knowing how much you and Keith loved each other, I also know there are only two people in this relationship. You are who you are because of everyone who's touched your life. I wouldn't have you any other way."

How lucky could he have gotten in his life to be loved by two such very special men? "I do love you, Lucas. You're stubborn and too walled up sometimes, and you work way too damn hard, but you get me like nobody else. Never doubt for a moment you're the only man I'll ever want."

"I love you too. You're opinionated and impossible, with an ego as wide as the sky, but I wouldn't have you any other way." Lucas rose and placed his hand on the headstone. "Bye, Keith. I miss you, buddy."

Jordan kissed his fingers, then touched the engraved letters of Keith's name. "Forever in both of our hearts, babe. See you soon."

Drew once told him that in the Jewish tradition, when you visited someone's grave, you put a small rock on top of the headstone to signify you'd been there to pay your respects. He and Lucas each found a small stone and placed them next to each other on top of Keith's grave.

He brushed the curls off Lucas's forehead and kissed him. "Let's go home." Hand in hand, they walked back to the car and drove away.