15. Juliet

The next fewdays pass in a bit of a blur. We get up, we eat, we're allowed to walk around a little. Gardening duty is strictly regulated, with small teams under tight supervision going down one at a time. If the last attack changed the mood of the compound, then the riot totally obliterated it. The delicate trust that existed between us and the feeders, no matter how precarious it sometimes felt, it was at least there.

Now there are two fresh graves in the cemetery and a whole lot of dark looks in the feeders' direction. Everyone is on edge, constantly waiting for the other side to strike the first blow.

It's exhausting.

I almost forget about draining. But then it's Monday morning, and I'm called out of bed just after dawn and ushered into the shower. I stand under the hot water, my arms hugged around myself, wondering if Silas is watching me through the mirror.

I squeeze my eyes shut as I remember the look on his face as he held me during the riot. The relief when he saw I wasn't hurt. The fury in his eyes when Matt hurt me. Sure, it was an accident. But to a man like Silas, I doubt that matters.

Why do I like him?

I open my eyes, blinking away droplets of water as they cling to my lashes. It's the first time I've admitted to myself that I might actually like Silas. It's such a strange feeling. I've never felt close to a feeder before - why would I? But with him, it's different. He feels safe.

But Matt made it pretty clear he doesn't want Silas anywhere near me. I shudder to think what would have happened if I hadn't intervened. Matt was out for blood, but Silas is the one with the strength to take it.

We all go through the motions, drying off and getting dressed, heading to the cafeteria for a stale breakfast barely anyone chokes down. Like sheep, lost in a new field, we head for the clinic. No one talks. Hardly anyone even looks up.

This sucks.

But my heart damn near leaps out of my chest when, instead of the usual vamps who deal with us in the clinic, Silas pushes through the blue curtain.

"Hello there." He smiles at me, even though his eyes darken when he looks at my black eye, that's still a really unique shade of purple.

"Hi. You on medic duty now?"

"Only for our VIPs."

"And I'm one of those?" I laugh. "Well, you can tell them the turndown service sucks."

"I'll pass that on." He sits beside me, raising his eyes to gaze at me with a small smile as he fastens the tourniquet around my arm. "You OK?"

I nod, suppressing a gasp as he taps the vein in my arm. His hands are really warm.

"You know, I never apologized."

"For?" He asks, without looking up.

"That day outside the shower block, when I said you"re cold and bloodless."

Silas chuckles low in his throat. "Small scratch now." He inserts the needle, and I barely feel it. He looks up at me with an almost wicked grin. "Sorry I said I'd get hard enough to make you scream."

I laugh out loud, and it feels like weights are rolling off my shoulders. "You did say that."

"I did."

"Are you actually sorry you said it?" I purse my lips and look him up and down. "Something tells me that when a man like you says something like that to a woman, he means it."

He draws down his eyebrows, faux anger dancing across his face even though he can't stop grinning. "Are you asking if I can walk the walk, as well as talk the talk?"

My cheeks flush with heat, I'm sure I'm bright red. "I mean… I didn't mean…"

He leans closer. "Are you asking what I'm like in bed?"

"Oh god, no." I shake my head, hoping he doesn't see me clenching my thighs together. "No, sorry, I was, I was joking."

He laughs, and holy shit is he gorgeous when he does that. "I know, just like getting a rise out of you."

"Well, you certainly did that." I exhale heavily and relax into the seat. "But you also made me laugh, so thank you."

He gives me a nod, leaning back in the chair, his long legs stretch out in front of him. I marvel once again at just how tall he is, he seems to just go on forever.

"Are you tattooed all over?"

Instantly that grin is back, full of swagger and sass. He runs his tongue over his teeth, and I can just feel the innuendo coming.

"Trying to get me naked now?"

I roll my eyes, trying to mask just how much I'm enjoying myself. "Yeah, absolutely. You've seen mine, time for me to see yours, right?"

"Well, if you insist." He starts to unbutton his khaki shirt, laughing and flashing his fangs when I shriek and cover my eyes. "Since you're so curious, I'm nothing but ink from the waist up."

"Well, except for that pretty face." I gesture with my hand, and he raises his eyebrows, clearly pleased with what I just said.

"You think I'm pretty, do you?"

I roll my eyes. "Stop it, you own a mirror right?"

"Oh well, thanks a lot." He crosses his arms over his chest. "Glad you think I'm pretty."

"So you're ink from the waist up. What about from the waist down?" Jesus, what is wrong with me? Why am I flirting with him? I have a boyfriend. This is so wrong. I quickly shake my head, hoping that the question I just asked somehow melts into the ether and he forgets about it.

Instead, the universe sends me a distraction in the form of a loud boom that has everyone in the clinic screaming. We're tied down with tubes in our arms, it's not like we can run.

"Hey now, you're OK, I've got you," Silas says, standing over me, his hands gently squeezing my shoulders. "It's just a weapons test, really it's alright."

"A weapons test?" I realize sweat has broken out on my upper lip, and I've grabbed onto his arm with the hand that isn't strapped down. "What do you mean?"

"Just new charges on the perimeter, they sound scarier than they are, really."

I gasp for air, focusing on his eyes, on the color. They're more brown than red, a really pretty rust color. He smiles softly, one thumb stroking down the side of my neck. My whole body relaxes at the touch, and I sigh, trying to regulate my breathing.

"Like a flash-bang, right?"

Silas laughs. "Yes, just like that." His thumb runs up the side of my throat again, back down again, his eyes still fixed on mine. "It's alright. You're safe. I promise."

"My dad was a cop." The words bubble out of me. "He taught me how to shoot. I-I used to be really good. I was never scared of how loud it was."

Silas nods. "Well, I know never to cross you then. You and all this sass, and a gun? No thanks."

I burst out into nervous giggles, and the sound is a little wobbly, tinged with hysteria. "They'd probably just bounce straight off you."

Silas laughs out loud, his whole face lit up, and if I was standing up my knees would go wobbly. God, this is all starting to mess with my head. I'm going crazy, because looking at him right now I'm convinced Silas is the most beautiful man I've ever seen in my life. I lift my hand, my fingertips barely brushing his jawline, and he freezes.

"Why do you make me feel like this?"

His Adam"s apple races up and down his throat, the tattoos on his neck shifting. "Feel like what?"

I shrug. "Safe."

The curtain gets thrown back, and Silas quickly straightens up, increasing the distance between us in an instant. Another feeder steps into the cubicle, jerking his thumb over his shoulder as he looks down at Silas.

"The obs tower needs you, come on."

"Yeah, no worries, I'll just finish up here and then I'll be along."

The feeder nods and turns on his heel, walking away without closing the curtain. Silas looks down at my arm, hesitating for a moment before he starts removing the needle, pressing cotton wool to the vein.

"Here, keep pressure on it for me." He keeps his eyes down, his fingers lingering, even as I push mine underneath his to keep the gauze in place. His fingers brush over mine gently, and shivers run down my spine. "He…" He clears his throat. "He's nice to you, isn't he?"

"Who? Matt?"

He nods, his eyes still fixed downwards.

"Yeah, he is."

"Good." He removes his hand from mine, getting a roll of tape and securing the gauze over the puncture in my arm.

My hand feels cold now that his is gone, and I feel so stupid for wishing he'd touch me again. He rises to his feet, tucking his hands into his pockets.

"I'm glad I make you feel safe. You deserve that." Before I can answer him, he strides out of the cubicle, leaving me alone and wondering what the hell just happened.

* * *

"You OK, baby?"Matt asks me as we clear our plates after dinner.

I sigh heavily. "You've asked me that about fourteen times already."

"Sorry." He leans against the wall next to me, running a hand through his hair. "You just seem really distracted tonight."

"Can you blame me? It hasn"t exactly been fun around here." I sound way harsher than I intended to, and I meet his eyes with a shrug. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap. I'm just… worn out."

He reaches out and rubs my shoulder. "You're tense, that's all. I get it."

I don't want to discuss my tension anymore, I don't want to tell Matt about Silas being nice to me and making me feel safe. I don't need the argument again. Instead I just give him a weak smile and nod.

Matt looks over his shoulder, then leans down close to me, grinning. "I know just what you need," he mutters.

"And what's that?"

"Come on." He grabs my hand, leading me out of the cafeteria while everyone finishes cleaning up.

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see." He nods at the feeders at the door, who barely acknowledge us. We walk down the steps, but instead of heading back towards the dorm, Matt turns left and starts walking faster.

"Matt." I giggle nervously, glancing over my shoulder. "Where are you taking me?"

He doesn't answer, guiding me around the side of the cafeteria, heading for the shower block. We reach an alcove at the far end of the building, and he pulls me into it, pushing me back against the wall.

"What are you doing?" I laugh breathlessly as he kisses my neck. "Babe, they'll be looking for us."

"Shhh." He pushes my top up over my breasts, and lowers his mouth to my right nipple, sucking hard.

I gasp, and rake my hands through his hair. "Matt, someone will see us." But even as I protest, I push my shorts and panties off. Matt follows suit, kicking his sweatpants away, lifting me up around his waist.

The wall at my back is rough, digging into my skin, but as soon as Matt sinks into me I don't even care, the discomfort melting away into pleasure. This position is so much better than being flat on my back in a tiny bed. His thrusts nudge against my clit like this, and it feels so good I dig my fingers into his shoulders. I've been dying for this release, just wanting to forget the last few days and have that rush.

Matt grins at me, breathing heavy. "Does that feel good?"

"Yeah, you feel so good."

"I bet he does."

The voice makes us both jump, and Matt and I both look over to see the big feeder with the reddish hair standing a few feet away. He's leaning against the wall, his arms crossed over his chest. He looks us up and down, his fangs glinting as he grins.

"Oh please don't stop on my account," he says, "the lady seemed to be enjoying that."

I unfurl my legs from around Matt's waist, and we both move to pick up our clothes.

"We were just heading back to the dorm," I say quietly.

The feeder laughs. "Yeah, I can see that's exactly where you were headed." He takes a step closer to us, his hands clasped behind his back. "Hmm, now, what am I going to do with the two of you?"

I quickly pull my shorts back on, shoving my panties into my pocket, and I suppress a shriek as the feeder rushes at me. He leers down at me, his red eyes glowing bright crimson.

"I'll take those, if you don't mind," he says, retrieving my panties from my shorts, and raising them to his nose. His eyes flutter closed as he inhales deeply, and my stomach contorts into a knot of ice.

Matt's just standing there, almost… almost casually. Panic whirs inside me. Why isn't he doing anything?

"Goddamn, girl," the feeder says with a sigh, "that sweet pussy of yours smells incredible." He looks back down at me, and lifts a hand to my face. "I'd have a lot of fun with you, little one."

I slap his hand away. "Don't fucking touch me."

He moves so fast I don't even see it, but suddenly I'm against the wall, his huge hand wrapped around my throat. He bears down on me, his lips pulled back to reveal his fangs.

"Matt," I say weakly as the feeder's hand presses the air from my windpipe, "call for help."

Matt looks around and gives the vamp a nod. "I'll keep watch out here."

The air is knocked out of my lungs. Matt's gaze sweeps over me, so indifferent it's almost cold. I shake my head weakly. This isn't happening.

"Matt," I plead, tears stinging my eyes. "Matt, call for help."

He leans back against the wall, hands in his pockets, eyes scanning the yard.

The feeder turns back to me, and lowers his lips to my cheek. "Now, sweet thing, you and me are going to have some fun." He releases my throat and I try to scream, but his hand smashes into my temple, and my vision goes fuzzy.

The ground moves closer, and then my head is swaying back and forth against his back. He's got me over his shoulder. He's carrying me off somewhere.

"You keep watch," he says. He keeps walking, his hand moving into my shorts. He pushes a finger inside me roughly, and I don't even have the presence of mind to flinch. It's like I'm watching it happen to someone else, like I'm walking behind this enormous man with an inert figure slung over his shoulder, dragging her off.

He withdraws his finger, and there's a disgusting sucking sound. "Delicious," he drawls.

A door scrapes on concrete, and slams shut heavily behind us. Then I'm flat on the floor, and there's concrete against my ass. My shorts are gone. I can't coordinate my limbs. They're made of stone, they belong to someone else. I open my eyes, pain shooting through my temple.

Through the haze, I can see the feeder undoing his belt.

"Oh, you and I are going to have a great fucking time," he says.

I can't scream.

He lunges at me.

I black out.