Chapter 5

5

ASHTON

H oly crap, I'd just seen a man naked. My eyes had taken in a man's penis in person for the first time in my life.

I was twenty-three years old. You'd think I'd be more experienced than this, but that was why I was here. And I'd gotten lucky enough to have tracked down the most beautiful penis possible.

Yes, I'd seen penises. I'd looked them up online. I'd even watched some videos on an adult content site a friend had told me about. I was curious, and the videos had also shown me a little bit about what to expect when I finally did have sex. I considered it educational.

"Damn, this is cold," Mac said after dunking his head.

Most of his body was underwater by then, but I couldn't erase the image of him fully naked. Would I have the courage to touch him? Would it be easier if he made it clear he wanted me to? Judging by how hard he was, I assumed that he was turned on by me. Or maybe any naked woman jumping in the water in front of him would do that.

"You get used to it," I said, looking off to my left. "Are you sure we won't be arrested for this?"

When I turned my attention back to him, he was staring at me. I couldn't read his expression. There was an intensity in his stare that I'd noticed earlier in the day. When he looked at me, it seemed obvious he wanted me, but I had no experience with interpreting things like that.

"Do you do this often?" he asked as I considered doing something flirtatious like asking if he needed someone to warm him up.

"Never," I said. "I have the most modest swimsuit of all my friends. I'm not really someone who likes my body on display."

Until today, I'd been shy about showing even too much cleavage around a guy. Until today. Those were the two key words.

"So, I brought out this side of you," he said.

It was as though he'd read my mind. Bringing out this side of me was exactly what he'd done.

"Yes." I nodded. "You've unleashed my naughty side."

Now, that was flirtatious. I crossed my arms over my chest, but it was under the water so he couldn't see. Or maybe he could. The water was pretty clear. It also wasn't very deep. I was on my knees just to get most of my body under the surface. He probably was in a full squat.

"Why don't you come over here and show me?" he asked.

All the air seemed to leak right out of my lungs. I couldn't breathe. Couldn't move. Couldn't speak. All I could do was stare at him and try to process the words that had just come out of his mouth.

Why don't you come over here and show me?

This was what I'd come to town to do. Was I going to chicken out now that I finally had the chance?

"You should know something about me," I said as I pushed up off the ground and began breaststroking my way toward him. I was trying to look as graceful as I could, but I wasn't exactly a seasoned swimmer. "I have to tell you before?—"

"You don't owe me any explanations," he said, giving me the "come here" gesture with his right hand. "Just get over here so I can kiss you."

It felt like my heart was trying to break through my chest wall, it was pounding so hard. Could he hear it? Probably not. Even as I reached him, the sound of water sloshing seemed to drown out everything else, including my heavy breathing.

The heat in his eyes was almost overwhelming this close up. Yes, he definitely wanted me. I'd never imagined just how it would feel to have a man look at me like that.

"Come here," he practically growled.

I was here, but that wasn't what he meant. He meant to move even closer. Move into his arms.

I'd barely taken a step when his hands were on my back, pulling me against him. My feet automatically settled on either side of his thighs, which put me pretty darn close to straddling him. My eyelids slammed shut as his lips made contact with mine, his tongue sliding into my mouth in a take-charge way that sent heat straight to the area between my legs.

Virgin. I had to tell him that. But I wouldn't be able to speak right now even if his mouth weren't covering mine. My entire body trembled as I settled against him, my thumb skimming across the skin at his nape as I rested my hands there.

"Mac," I said when our kiss finally broke.

"Mmm." He opened his eyes and looked down at me. "I like it when you say my name."

My breath caught. This was all so much. Almost too much. I was on sensory overload. At the same time, I didn't want to do anything that might ruin this for me.

I guess I hadn't thought through what coming here to lose my virginity actually meant. I never thought about deceiving a guy into sleeping with a virgin. I wouldn't do that. It wouldn't be fair to him. But now that I'd met Mac, the thought of not being completely upfront was almost laughable.

No, I had to tell this guy the truth. About everything. For the rest of my life.

Yes, I was thinking about the rest of my life all of a sudden. Specifically, I was thinking about spending the rest of my life with this guy.

"I'm a virgin."

The word came out as basically word vomit. Just one big burst. I waited, holding my breath, staring directly at him as I tried to decipher his reaction. Slowly, his features hardened and a line formed between his eyebrows. That was definitely a frown.

"A…virgin?" he asked.

He said the word as though it was completely foreign to him. Maybe it was. Guys like Mac probably didn't run into too many virgins. He was probably used to experienced women throwing themselves at him, not women like me, who still had so much to learn.

"My friends and I saw that video that went viral of Jax," I said. "We decided this town was probably full of guys just like him. Single, hot, perfect for our first time."

He blinked several times in rapid succession. It was clear he was trying to process all of this.

"So, you came here to lose your virginity?" he asked. "You and your friends?"

I could feel it. A wall going up between us. I waited for it to bother me that I might have just jeopardized my chances of reaching my goal today.

But that wasn't what bothered me. Not at all. No, what bothered me was the thought that I might be losing this guy. That he'd put a wall between us. It was a wall I wanted to tear down.

"That was before I met you, though," I said. "Now that I've met you…it's different."

His features softened slightly, or maybe that was wishful thinking. All I knew was I felt my chance to keep him in my life slipping away. I had to lay it all out on the line, even if it meant I might scare him off for completely different reasons.

"I've never felt anything like this before," I said. "We have a connection. Is it my imagination?"

Now the frown completely disappeared. He looked almost relieved.

"I've been thinking the same thing," he said.

I didn't even try to suppress the smile that spread over my face at that news. "What are we waiting for then?"

But there was still uncertainty in his expression. "I don't think this should be your first time. I want to make it special."

I looked around. "Are you kidding? This is a story we can tell our grandchildren."

He threw his head back and laughed at that. I loved the sound of his laugh. I loved everything about him.

Did that mean I loved him? Maybe not yet, but I was getting there.

"I don't think this is a story we'll be telling our grandkids someday," he said. "Maybe our friends."

"I can totally see sharing this story with my friends. I guarantee my first time story will beat theirs."

"Oh, so it's a competition?" he asked.

I shook my head. "If it were a competition, I'd have already won."

His hands started moving up my back, proving just how true the statement was. I'd won big with this guy, and I wasn't going to do anything to mess it up.