Chapter 21

CHAPTER 21

Sarah

B right light. Should I go to it? They always say to go to the bright light, but I don’t want to. I don’t want to leave Jac and Deacon and my new friends. Can I haunt Halla, or will I have to haunt Earth? Please let me stay—

With a gasp of breath, my eyes fluttered open, and I needed a minute for them to adjust to the brightness overhead. Nothing I saw made any sense— the afterlife has machinery?

“She’s awake!” Deacon shouted joyously.

“Are you alright? How are you feeling? Don’t sit up!” Jac said at the other side of the exam table when I tried to move.

Suddenly, I remembered everything all at once. The screams. Rage shooting through me. The sight of Jac and Tiger on their knees by Mother Portend. The scent of so much blood and sweat. My own warmth, gushing down my body from my throat…

I lifted a hand to touch my neck, but Deacon gently grabbed my wrist before I could make contact. “No, stop, it’s healing.”

“I’m healing?” I rasped, hearing the awe in my own voice when I thought I’d died. “I’m alive?”

The pair smiled at each other in relief. Then, Jac nodded at me. “Yes, Sarah. You’re alive.”

“Oh.”

Deacon laughed. “Oh? Is that all?”

“Tiger and Drift?” I asked, more recollections flooding me of the battle as I tried to account for everyone. “What—who—died?”

“They’re both injured, but they’ll heal. Actually, we didn’t take any losses, outside of Kapok,” Deacon said sadly. “We managed to win this battle.”

“How?”

Jac moved closer and picked up one of my hands in his, soothing me with his warmth. “During the fight, I managed to run to Allegiant and put a call out to Lanai to come back to the ship asap. Lanai—”

“The android that fucked Ryan?” I asked, remembering the name.

“Yes,” Deacon said. “Lanai Dea is the newest De model, and in addition to seduction techniques and other skills, she has incomparable combat capabilities.”

“Basically, he got the fancy android, and she saved all our asses,” Jac explained with a laugh. “She and Mock, anyway.”

“Who is Mock?” I asked, trying to connect those dots. “And the conduit who helped us? I don’t understand.”

“My father’s friends, Mock, Bell, and Fan, they were compatriots of his in the old days,” Deacon explained as he smoothed his hand along my cheek, seemingly needing to touch me as much as Jac did. “Jac had helped Bell and Fan escape from the royal prisons a few years ago. Mock had moved to Halla after—”

“There are Ladrians who live here with the ghosts?” I asked in surprise.

Deacon nodded. “It is usually for those who have lost their way. Mock fell apart after his consort died in the war. He lives a quiet life here on Halla.”

“We destroyed his quiet,” I mumbled.

“It is quiet once again,” Deacon assured me. “The remaining conduits have gone into hiding. Omen Ayext, the conduit who helped us, estimates there are likely fewer than thirty on Halla now.”

I took a breath and let it out slowly. “Some of the conduits escaped?”

“Yes, but we will hunt them down,” Jac said.

I rapidly shook my head. “No—”

“We have to,” he insisted. “Otherwise, they’ll come after you, Sarah.”

“No, they can’t—”

“They can and they will,” Deacon insisted.

I gestured with my hands to stop them from continuing—I just needed them to shut up a minute. Before I could take a moment to reset my brain, a hot white fog started pouring from their mouths and noses and into my hands.

Terror gripped me. “The fuck!”

Both of them tried to speak and couldn’t.

I shook my hands in a panic, and the eerie fog returned to them. So did their voices. They were shouting together at the same time, so I held my ears. “Stop, please!”

Jac shut his mouth, but Deacon yelled for the doctor. “Ode!”

The doctor ran in and smiled as soon as she saw me. “Look who’s awake—”

“I just did something,” I blurted out hysterically, not understanding what had just happened. “I don’t know what I did, but I didn’t mean to!”

She frowned and looked to the other two for answers. “What is she talking about?”

Deacon looked scared or worried or both. “Remember during the fight, when Silence left Father’s, and stole the voices of the chanting conduits when she lifted her hands?”

“Yes, but—”

“Sarah just stole our voices,” Deacon told her.

“I gave them back!” I yelled defensively.

Jac chuckled and kissed the top of my head. “We know you didn’t mean to do it. It’s okay.”

Ode took a beat, thinking things over before responding. “It’s probably because we took Silence’s blood for her.”

“You did what ?” Jac asked.

“It was the only way to save her, according to Deacon,” Ode said, shifting her gaze to Deacon and arching a brow. “I had no idea Sarah was royal-born.”

“I learned only a few hours before the fight,” I piped in. “But Deacon knew.”

“And you didn’t think to tell me?” Jac snapped at Deacon.

He merely sighed, instead of barking back at him. “I was protecting you, Jac. I didn’t know who would use that information against you or anyone on your crew.”

I reached for each of their hands, not liking when they were at odds with one another. “Hey, the cat’s out of the bag now, so let’s not dwell on it, okay?”

Jac continued to glare at Deacon, who avoided his gaze.

Ode went on, ignoring the tension in the room. “It’s likely a side effect of taking Silence’s blood, so there’s a good chance it will wear off as your body replenishes your own blood supply. Try not to wave your hands around too much for the next few days, and you should be fine. You may want to speak to Silence about controlling it, though, just in case.”

I smiled at the doctor, appreciating her care. “Thank you, Ode.”

She gingerly touched what should have been a fatal wound at my throat. “How is your neck feeling?”

Shockingly, I felt no sharp or excruciating pain as she gently probed. “Tender, but in one piece.”

“Good.” Ode patted my shoulder. “The tenderness will fade in a day or two. I still can’t believe you did that, just to kill Mother Portend.”

I shrugged. “I knew I would nick myself—I just wasn’t sure how off my aim was, going backward at Portend like that. But I thought—well, I had hoped —you could save me, if I screwed up. Considering how hurt Jac was after he was stabbed, I figured you could do anything.”

Ode scowled at me. “Please don’t ever test my medical credentials like that again. It was touch and go for the past five days—”

I blinked at the doctor. “Five days?”

She nodded. “You’ve been in a minimally conscious state for the past five days, Sarah. You responded to some stimuli, but—”

“It’s been five days?”

“She does this sometimes, Ode,” Deacon advised, shaking his head in exasperation. “When she hears something she does not agree with or does not want to believe, she often repeats herself or parrots back what you said. I do not believe it to be a sign of neurological damage—”

Ode and Jac laughed in amusement, and Deacon frowned at them.

“I’m familiar with human speech patterns, not to worry,” Ode said. “I did not think poorly of her for it. I will let you three speak alone. I need to check on Tiger and Drift.”

“Thank you, Ode,” I said, grateful for everything she’d done to make sure I didn’t die. “They’ll be okay, too?”

“You saved them both,” she said, and smiled. “Portend would have killed them. Truth is, killing her very likely saved the rest of us, too. You’re a hero.”

It was my fault you were in danger in the first place . I had no clue what to say. “Oh.”

She finally left us, closing Allegiant’s infirmary door behind herself.

“We will hunt the other conduits down, Sarah.” Deacon took my hand and kissed the back of it. “I swear to you.”

“No, and don’t interrupt me this time, or I’ll use my magic hands on you again,” I said firmly. “I don’t want anyone hunted down for me. I don’t want any more death. I can’t have that on my conscience.”

Also, I knew I couldn’t have either of them be in mortal danger for me ever again. I cared about both of them too much. I hated myself for saying it, but I had to. I didn’t see any other option. For any of us.

“I want to go home,” I said.

“We will set up a residence for you here, and—”

I shook my head and Deacon stopped speaking. “I want to go back to Earth ,” I clarified. “I can’t…I can’t handle being here. This life is too terrifying for me.” But I knew it was so much more than that.

Very quietly, Jac asked, “Are you sure about this, Sarah? This is what you truly want?” His beautiful purple eyes looked pained, as did Deacon’s glowing amber ones.

Tears burned my eyes. “I am not equipped to deal with any of this, Jac. I wouldn’t even know where to begin. I have never been more scared, angrier, more…” in love . It tore me up inside to admit it, but I had to do this for them. I had to save them from trying to save me.

“I can’t do this,” I whispered, forcing out the words and trying to ignore the crestfallen look on both their faces. “I’m not a soldier. I barely have an education, much less the knack for handling any of this. I don’t know what I’m doing here. You both…”

I started to cry, and I couldn’t stop the tears from flowing. The thought of leaving them behind was like a dagger to my heart. “I almost died, and I’m frightened, and I just want to go home.”

Jac wrapped his arms around me and I buried my face against his chest. “I’m so sorry, Sarah. I didn’t mean to get ransomed—”

I laughed and snotted on his uniform. “I know that.”

“This is all my fault,” he grumbled.

“No, the fault lies with me,” Deacon said quietly. “I am the one who initiated all of this by having Jac abduct you. No one would have been in danger, were it not for me thinking Sarah was up to the task at hand.”

Jac uncurled himself from me and shot his friend a droll look. “I won’t say, ‘I told you so,’ but I’m going to think it very loudly.”

Deacon smirked at him. “You are well within your right to tell me. Go ahead. I can take it.”

But Jac shook his head and smiled. “Not my style.”

Their sweet playfulness made me smile, too, before it made my heart ache even more for how much I was going to miss them. “I don’t want to leave you both behind, but I don’t know what else to do. This is way above my pay grade.”

Deacon nodded solemnly. “We will return you to Earth. I am sorry for all the trouble I have caused you, Sarah. This was too much for any human to deal with, and I should have heeded Jac’s original advice on the matter.”

“What was the original advice?” I asked curiously.

Jac started, “Volatile Bateen—”

“My father?” I asked, interrupting him.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake. That’s who your father is?” He rolled his eyes in a sardonic manner, as if finally putting all the pieces together for himself. “Of course it is.”

“What?” I asked, not understanding.

“Your dear old daddy was a merchant before the war, and that guy travelled all over the universe to move product,” Jac said in a wry tone. “Let’s just say, he was not shy with any of the ladies. And some of the guys. And others.”

I frowned. “My dad is a manwhore?”

Jac laughed. “Yes. So, my original plan was for us to search for his offspring, who could be conduits—Deacon, how hard was it for you to keep Sarah’s parentage a secret?”

Deacon winced guiltily. “The knowledge burned in my brain like a thousand suns.”

The pair chuckled with each other before Jac slapped Deacon on the back and said, “Good. Glad it hurt. Maybe next time you’ll trust me.”

“I trust you!” Deacon defended himself. “I did not tell you because I wanted everyone to be as safe as possible.”

“How can I go back?” Part of me meant physically, but the rest of me meant emotionally. How can I leave these two men, who I have fallen for and want so badly? How can I leave them behind?

To protect them. Because that’s all that mattered to me. Their lives. And on this planet, here with them, I was a liability.

Even though there was a sadness in Deacon’s eyes, he smiled and pulled something from his pocket. “I understand diamonds are an important commodity on Earth, right?”

“Yes. Why?”

He held out his big hand and in his palm was the largest solitary diamond I had ever seen on a ring. Square-cut, the diamond looked to be the size of my thumbnail.

“This ring is like the one that Lanai Dea uses to travel between worlds,” he explained. “This one is smaller than hers, but I thought it was more appropriate to your size—”

“You knew I would want to go back?” I interrupted him.

His gaze met and held mine. “I had hoped you would not. But I feared you would. Though after everything that happened…” he sighed. “I would have been worried if you had wanted to stay. The ring will allow you to return, if you ever feel the desire to do so. It will return you here to Allegiant , if you turn the diamond one-quarter turn to the right.”

He slipped the ring onto my left ring finger. A perfect fit. It felt appropriate and odd to leave Earth with an engagement ring but return with this one. “Thank you, Deacon.”

He nodded somberly.

Jac huffed and looked away, grumbling, “I can’t believe you’re leaving.”

I swallowed the tight knot of emotion gathering in my throat. “Are you angry with me?”

“Never,” he said in a raspy tone, then shifted his gaze back to my face. “Only…I will miss you more than I know how to say.”

Deacon looked like he knew exactly how Jac felt. Completely devastated.

My own sorrow was just as acute, but so was the desire that stirred inside of me for these two alien men who’d come to mean so much to me. I wanted—no, I needed —them one last time.

Sitting up on the exam table, I reached out for Jac’s uniform and used it to pull him close, giving him a sultry smile. “I don’t have to leave this minute.”

Then, I kissed him. The tension in his body melted as his noduled tongue slipped past my parted lips. It was like pressing pause on my overwhelming anxiety. I didn’t have to think about the perils of Halla and that nightmare I had barely survived, as long as I was kissing him.

Deacon snuggled up behind me, lifting my hair out of his way. He licked up the back of my neck, sending shivers down to my toes. I reached back for him, sliding my hand around his neck—I needed to touch him, too.

Then, in a gruff tone he said, “ Allegiant , bed. And seal the infirmary doors.” The two of them stepped away.

“Infirmary doors, sealed,” Allegiant’s soothing feminine voice said.

The exam table I’d been sitting on stretched outward in all directions, until I was in the middle of what looked like four king sized mattresses morphed together.

I turned around to see them standing at the foot of the new bed. Their eyes were on me, hot and hungry, as they quickly took their clothes off until they were completely naked.

Before they climbed aboard, they kissed each other, seemingly enjoying that human tradition, as did I. It was so damn erotic to watch them go at one another with such passion and masculine dominance. While they made out, I slipped out of my infirmary gown and crawled down the bed to their end. I stroked their stiff cocks, still struggling to get my hand around their girths. But then I had a thought.

I searched Jac’s discarded uniform for his mog belt and put it on. Then, I hit the button and morphed within seconds.

The transformation made my neck stop aching so much, but what made mogging truly valuable was seeing Jac’s lustful reaction to my sleek, feminine, Ladrian body. He lovingly stroked my blue hair from my head down to my tail, and the sensation made me quake with pleasure.

“ Fuck ,” he growled, before he took me in his arms and flung me onto the bed.

I let out a soft squeal of surprised laughter at his manhandling, which quickly died away as he climbed on top of me, licking my strange skin with that knobby tongue of his and eliciting more arousing sensations. Then, he started to bite at me.

In my Ladrian form, the sharp nip of his teeth along the inside of my thighs took on a whole different dimension. It was like each one shot pleasure through that part of me. The bites were rougher than humans usually do—almost like he was trying to mark my flesh and claim me barbarically…and I loved it. By the time he made it up my legs, I was panting for breath, wetter than ever, and playing with my full, firm breasts that were much larger than my own.

Until Deacon joined us.

He sat behind me and wrapping a strong arm around my waist, he hauled me onto his lap, my legs between his. My sensitive tail was pressed against his cock, making me writhe against him. Jac pulled my legs apart, so they were draped over Deacon’s, and Deacon spread his legs wide, forcing mine even wider, exposing me for Jac’s pleasure.

I groaned as Jac’s tongue swiped up my pussy and over my folds, while he got comfortable on his stomach. With his big hands splayed on my thighs, he pushed my legs even wider, and his tongue dove deep into me, those textured nodules reaching and rubbing against all sorts of erogenous zones.

I cried out, gripping Jac’s hair in my fingers, while Deacon grabbed my tits.

He plucked my nipples until they hurt and growled in my ear, “Does that feel good, consort?”

My entire body jolted. “Yes!”

He slapped my breasts then squeezed them harder, and my pussy quivered around Jac’s deep, marauding tongue. "You like it when we're rough with you like this?”

My pulse raced and liquid heat rushed through my veins. “Fuck, yes!”

He pinched and pulled my nipples, one after the other, and I couldn’t get enough of that pleasurable pain. Between his abrasive hands and Jac’s searing tongue, I was blissed out.

Deacon buried his face against the side of my neck and said, “Your tail is twitching against my cock, consort. Feels so good.”

“I want to make you feel good,” I panted, squirming against him.

He untangled his limbs from mine, and Jac got out of the way as Deacon repositioned me, pushing me backward onto the bed.

Then, he straddled my chest, fisted his hand in my hair to angle my head, and fed me his cock until the head was buried in my throat. “ This is how you make me feel good now.”

Deacon’s shaft stretched my lips wide as he fucked my mouth rhythmically, almost brutally—because he could—while Jac’s tongue resumed working my G-spot over. I raked my nails up Deacon’s thighs. He hissed and I moaned around his cock. I was so close to the moment of ecstasy I couldn’t remember what had me so upset before.

All thoughts were gone, except for everything these two men made me feel. My men. Even as they ravaged me, I still felt worshipped and adored. Cherished . I was theirs, and they were mine.

“Jac, move!” Deacon suddenly said, withdrawing his cock from my mouth.

I made a whimpering sound of protest, and much to my dismay, Jac obeyed the order, leaving me empty and bereft until Deacon moved lower, between my spread legs. His hands gripped my thighs apart, so forcefully I was sure there would be glorious bruises later, before he lined up the head of his cock at my core.

His jaw clenched and his amber eyes glowed as they held mine. “I’m going to wreck this pussy, consort, so you’ll remember who you belong to. Us. ”

Even transformed with an alien physique better suited to accept all of him, Deacon was still huge and thick and ruthless as he slammed all his inches inside of my Ladrian body, burying himself balls deep. We snarled at each other like animals, and my pussy lit up every time he thrust deeper, forcing me to take his merciless pounding.

I did. Willingly and enthusiastically.

I reached out for Jac—I needed him, too. He came to me, his thick, long cock dripping with lust. I grabbed his pulsing shaft and greedily took him into my mouth. With a low, deep growl, he palmed the back of my head and took over Deacon’s face-fucking duties, gagging me with his cock, but this time, my head was turned to the side.

Jac stroked my face as he marveled at me. He touched my cheek when his cock passed by there. It was like he was fascinated, and enamored by, my Ladrian body. And me.

He forced me to swallow him down until I choked, his voice burning when he spoke, “You are exquisite, Sarah.”

I was hypnotized by the two of them as they both continued to use me for their pleasure. Deacon’s thickness and veins rubbed me in all the ways I needed, and it wasn’t long before my orgasm crested. Jac, sensing I was close, let his dick slide out of my mouth while I grabbed onto Deacon’s shoulders for something to keep me grounded as I cried out and came all over his cock, triggering his release. He roared as he came inside me, his cock pulsing in time with his shimmering skin.

As soon as he finished and moved away, Jac took his place, granting me no reprieve as he pounded into me without respite—like he had been waiting that whole time just to get inside of me, to claim me, as well. Then, abruptly, he pulled out and flipped me over onto my stomach. He stroked me again like before—head to tail—and my body shook hard from those pleasurable caresses and a purring sound rolled out of my throat.

He petted my furry tail as he entered me again, while I was on my hands and knees, grinding into me with rough, deep gyrations that made me moan. His fingers gripped my hips, giving him the leverage to yank my body back onto his cock every time he slammed forward.

Deacon laid back and our eyes met as he watched us with a hooded gaze, his hand stroking his already half hard cock, a testament to their stamina. “You like when I watch you with Jac, consort?”

I bit my bottom lip, while Jac grunted and hammered into me, jarring me forward every time he drove his shaft deep inside my body. “Yes!”

Deacon reached out and tenderly smoothed my blue, silky Ladrian hair away from my face, a wicked smile on his lips. “Well, I like sharing you and watching him fuck you. I know how good his cock feels.”

My mind danced with the thought of the two of them in the same position we were in, making my heart pound. Jac’s hands were like vise grips on my hips, holding me tight as he continued drilling into me. “You two…fuck like this?”

Deacon smirked. “We used to. All the time.”

Then, he shimmied his way beneath me, so my tits bounced in his face. He licked and bit them until they were sensitive and sore, while Jac’s cock hollowed me out and I was a moaning, quivering mess of need.

It was all too much. My fists clenched the sheets. I couldn’t hold back any longer, and as I came, Jac petted me again down to my tail, and it was like triggering an erogenous zone. The biggest orgasm I ever had rained through me, making me toss back my head and howl like a beast in the forest. Every muscle locked tight, every feel-good chemical in my brain raced through my neurons. The fire between us became an inferno.

Jac felt it, too. He thrashed wildly against me, and the animalistic sounds erupting from his chest grew louder.

“Come in her, Jac!” Deacon demanded from beneath me.

Jac’s powerful, warrior’s body shot into me, his hips slamming against my ass with wicked speed and his cock pulsating, until he buried himself as deep as he could go and came with a ghost-shattering groan I felt all the way to my soul. He held onto me with a bruising grip, while his cock twitched and danced inside, his hot, slick fluids spurting and filling me.

When he finally pulled out, Deacon said, “Lay back, consort.”

But I couldn’t move, so Jac helped me to lay on my back once more, then settled on his side next to me. Deacon wedged himself between my legs and licked into me, and I gasped in shock. What he was doing after Jac just released inside of me was so damn filthy, I lost my mind.

“Fuck!” I couldn’t believe he wanted to do that, but it felt too good after such a masterful fucking. Like his tongue was there to soothe my battered and raw insides.

Jac chuckled against my ear, the sound a little more than depraved. “Don’t be so shocked, Sarah. Our classed Deacon is a very dirty boy. And it’s not like he hasn’t tasted my cum before.”

The image painted an erotic picture in my mind, elevating my desire. Each deep lick was another flame inside of me, and soon my body shamelessly rocked against his mouth. I was too lit up not to orgasm again, and it wasn’t long before I did.

“God, now!” I cried out.

Jac crushed his mouth to mine and kissed me, while Deacon made me come on the tip of his tongue. It was like an aftershock of an orgasm, and it brought friends. When the first one was over, another came into me. Jac pressed against the back of Deacon’s head to force his tongue even deeper into my pussy so that it fucked me. His tongue lit me up with every pass, and I could not stop coming until I was utterly spent and exhausted.

It wasn’t until Deacon’s tongue finally slowed that I could breathe again. His tongue slipped out of me, as he licked me clean everywhere. Each sensual stroke calmed me down until I nearly dozed off. Finally, he kissed my belly and laid next to me, pulling me close to his side. Jac did the same, slinging an arm around my waist and settling on the other side of me.

Sandwiched between my guys, I fell asleep once more.