17. Felix

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

felix

We should probably stop. I mean, I don’t want to. My cock definitely doesn’t want to, but I’m scared. More afraid than I’ve ever been in my life because there’s no doubt in my mind. I’ve fallen for this man.

And not just him, but his daughter too. I can’t imagine life without either one of them. But I know deep down, Henry is ready to run at any minute. He doesn’t trust that I want them both. That I need them.

Given his past, I can’t blame him. We haven’t known each other very long, and he knew Maggie for years. She hurt him deeply when she left. His parents caused so many scars on his soul long before he met her. I know the pain he’s been through will impact the rest of his life. He deserves someone loving him deeply and showing him with actions, not just words.

Jumping into physical stuff is probably selfish of me. I know he’s vulnerable, but I also feel like it’s more. So much more than just wanting to get off. I don’t just want his body. I want every part of him. I want to show him in every way that I care. Show him how good it can be when two people are together and really in it.

Both. In. It.

Not just for now. Not just when I want something. But in deep.

His hands on me, slowly moving over every ridge of my muscles, has me trembling. Has me wanting so much more. “I think I want to play,” he whispers against my mouth, and I’m totally done for.

I crash my lips against his and kiss the hell out of him until we’re both breathless. I’m trying to keep quiet, considering Hazel is asleep in her crib, but when he nibbles on my bottom lip, I’m a goner.

I moan into his mouth and pull back to look at him, at his smooth skin with tattoos scattered throughout. When my hand rests over his groin, I groan at the feeling of his hardened shaft. When I squeeze him through his sweats, his hips buck up, and he moans loudly, “Oh holy fuck.”

“I want you so bad, I can barely stand it,” I pant against his lips and kiss him, moving from his lips to his jaw and then down his neck. I want to do everything with him. I want to explore him, but I’m also dying, my balls aching to release already as he thrusts into my hand.

My hands go to the top of his sweats and after looking into his eyes for permission, he nods, and I push them and his briefs down, revealing his flushed cock. It’s standing long and proud, leaking from the tip and begging for my attention.

I look up at him. “I’m negative. I was tested after the last time I was with someone, and that was a few months ago.”

Understanding dawns on him, despite the lust in his eyes. “I was tested after the last time with Maggie. That was the last time I was with anyone. I’m negative too.”

I nod, licking my lips as I look at the bead of precum forming on the tip of his slit. “I have to taste you,” I say as I slide down to the floor between his spread legs, and he lets out a gasp when I drag my tongue over the moisture there.

“Oh God, Felix.” His head falls back against the couch as his fingers thread through my hair. “Yes.”

I take that as a good sign and let my tongue explore his hot shaft, teasing the ridge of the head and the slit, then sliding along the entire length. “God, you taste so damn good.”

He starts to say something, but it dies off when I take the head into my mouth, hollowing my cheeks and sucking hard. “Oh, holy fuck!”

I want to remind him to be quiet, and I probably should, but damn it, he’s so fucking beautiful like this. He’s relaxed, though his fingers grip my hair as his back bows. I take more of him into my mouth, fighting my gag reflex when he hits the back of my throat.

His cock twitches in my mouth at the sound, and when he starts to apologize and pull back, I grasp his firm ass with both hands and encourage him to go on. He fucks my mouth after that. I let my throat relax, taking each beautifully, brutal thrust, my own cock throbbing in my sweats so hard, I move one of my hands from the globes of his ass and reach into my sweats.

I stroke myself, moaning around his dick, and when his cock twitches in my mouth and he lets out a shout, we’re both totally gone. I furiously stroke my cock, using the precum leaking from the head as lubricant, until his cum floods my throat and my cum flows from my dick and over my hand.

I suck him dry and then lick upward until his cock is clean. I climb onto the couch, straddling him and bring my mouth to his and kiss him, sharing the taste of his release, which he doesn’t seem to mind.

He kisses me hard, his hands cupping my face until we both pull back to catch our breath.

“Well, that was fun,” I say with a smile, but I’m afraid to look him in the eyes. Terrified I’ll see regret in them.

“Felix, look at me.” He’s still holding my face in his hands, but he doesn’t force me.

I slowly turn to look at him, and when I look into his eyes, I don’t see regret or even fear. He looks more at peace and more satisfied than I’ve ever seen him. Relaxed and calm. “Thank you.”

He kisses my lips softly, and then I pull back. “For what?”

A slow smile forms on his lips. “That was amazing.”

I smile too. “It was. Really amazing.” My smile fades, and I quickly add, “It doesn’t have to mean anything though.”

His thumb strokes my cheek, and I’m surprised to see his smile hasn’t faded. “It meant everything to me.”

My chest swells, and I take a deep, shuttering breath and whisper, “Me too.”

He pulls me into him and wraps his arms around me, my face resting in the crook of his neck. I lie there, letting him hold me. I don’t know if this thing between us can ever actually be more.

I know I want it to be, but I know there’s a long road ahead. Henry has been through hell, and his one priority is Hazel, as it should be. I’d never hurt him or Hazel, but I know it’s going to take a lot to prove that to him.

To make damn sure he trusts me and knows I’m not going anywhere. Trust, though, takes a lot of time, especially when you’re dealing with someone who’s had their trust broken so many times. Who’s been so hurt over and over again.

Lucky for me and for him, I’ve got all the time in the world.