Chapter Fifty-Seven

C HAPTER F IFTY-SEVEN

The smoke from the pyre that Enox has lit aflame outside the courtyard twists and writhes towards the sky, carrying the essence of my brother with it. I stand silently among everyone close to me, mourning him as my gaze stays fixed upon the flickering flames that consume Idris.

I’m no longer crying. There’s nothing left in me to cry.

The scent of burning cedarwood is heavy, and the cries of everyone around me burden me with even more sorrow. It’s then that I feel the presence of a dozen beings behind me.

Turning to look, I see the faces of different creatures staring at me. Deers, rabbits, dragons – all of them look to me for comfort and safety. Tibith walks past them with Fernah at his side. He looks so small beside her, and his eyes glisten with tears.

I smile at him to let him know I am okay. But that would be a lie. Everyone knows it would be.

Shifting my gaze towards the pyre, I squeeze Darius’s hand. I don’t look at him, but I know his eyes are already on me.

I could have done something. We could both have together. I know it. I want to at least believe it – that as Solaris and Crello’s vessels, there might have been a way.

Come back , my mind says. I need you, Idris.

Yet, as his body turns to ashes, I know he never will.

I stand inside my brother’s room, staring at the tools he used to craft weapons and straps. The bed is made, the pillows are fluffed and ready for him to lay down on.

There is a knock at the door and I peer over my shoulder to where Darius now stands against the jamb. He walks inside and I search the depths of his gold eyes, seeking to borrow his strength for myself as he comes to a stop.

‘He’s gone,’ I whisper, my voice breaking.

And yet everything that belonged to him remains intact.

Darius’s gaze holds mine, unflinching, before he wraps me in his arms. My body aches for the release of tears, but I can’t cry. I’m numb; I’m broken; I’m barely surviving.

‘Leira found this while cleaning our room,’ he says as we separate. I glance at the folded parchment piece in his hands. He sighs. ‘Illias, Iker and Freya all received similar letters to this.’

I stare at it. At my name scribbled across the opening.

A letter.

He wrote us each a letter.

I remember he had been practising how to write lately. The letters must have been the last things he wrote.

My chest feels heavy, and with shaky fingers, I take the letter out of Darius’s hand and unfold it to read.

My dearest sister,

By the time you read this, I might not be here.

I knew after I was bitten that there would be no cure, and no matter what you did, we just would not have had enough time.

I do not fear death like most would in these circumstances. I always knew I would be the first to go, although I often thought it would be due to you scaring me half to death whenever you rebelled.

I’m glad to know that wasn’t the case in the end.

You have made me the proudest bruther, Nara, and I hope you know that, but please, look after Iker and Illias. They need you.

And . . . tell Iker that I would be delited if he ended up with Freya, because I know that I will never have children nor a wyf to share my life with, but he still can.

For as long as I can remember, I have always beleeved my true purpose was to look out for my siblings and I think I did just that.

So, Nara, my little sister whom I’ll miss, keep chasing that adventure, there is always more to come.

With love, your brother,

Idris

I read it once. Then twice, then a third and a fourth time, memorising his messy writing, the misspellings of a few words and the way he writes his name at the end.

‘He always knew,’ I say quietly. Part of me wishes I could find the strength to be mad at him for it, but it’s impossible. I want him back. I want to prove to him he could have the life he thought he couldn’t.

I want to smile and feel happy, seeing him with his own children and wife.

I want to argue with him every day if it means he will return.

‘Goldie,’ Darius whispers, tracing his thumb across my cheek. ‘I hate seeing you like this.’ He drops his forehead against mine, our eyes closed. ‘Tell me. Tell me what to do, and I swear I’ll do it just to see you smile.’

I shake my head. ‘I want him back.’

‘I know,’ he says. ‘And trust me, I have thought of every solution to bring him back.’

And I believe that.

Darius would even trade his life for my brothers if he could.

I shift away and turn my back to him, my eyes scanning Idris’s room all over again. ‘There is one thing we can do.’ My voice sounds hollow as I think about every choice I have made in my life that has led me here. ‘I want to fight.’ I whirl around, my blood pumping with rage as I remember Aurum’s threats and the fact he did this. He bit my brother, knowing the outcome.

Darius stares at me, his expression giving away nothing. And then he starts to smile that smile that always brings me to my knees. ‘I believe it is time we called in that favour from Kirian.’

I don’t say a word. I just march up to him and kiss him ferociously. It is a clash of grief and resolve, fierce and gentle all at once, like a storm that not even someone as powerful as Aurum can stop.

I have strived tirelessly to avoid engaging in prophesied battles, believing that by doing so, we could preserve lives. I was wrong. Because, in the end, it isn’t just about fighting a war. It is about standing together, past enemies and all, for the one thing that matters most.

This world.