4. Valerie

4

VALERIE

3 Months Later

“What do you mean you quit your job?” Megan’s shriek echoes through my car’s speakers, filling the cabin and making me wince.

I turn down the volume and then put both hands back on the steering wheel. While the traffic in Houston is worse, the unfamiliar roads on the outskirts of Dallis are filled with chaotic drivers, making me nervous.

“I mean that I quit my job,” I repeat what I told my best friend shortly after she answered my phone call.

“When?!”

“Yesterday.”

“What!” In my head, I picture her gaping in disbelief. “Why? What happened?”

The smartwatch on my wrist vibrates, drawing my attention to the dashboard where the GPS directions are displayed. I turn on my blinker and try to navigate to the right lane to exit. A car speeds up to block my first attempt, but I manage to move over and make the exit in just enough time.

“Hello? Valerie? Are you seriously going to leave me hanging?”

“Sorry.” I wait until I’m safely on the access road before I add, “I’m driving.”

“Where are you?”

“Dallas.”

She gasps. “You left Houston without even telling me?!”

I cringe. “Sorry.”

“Stop saying sorry and tell me what’s going on,” she demands. “You’re worrying me.”

I know I am. I’m worrying myself.

I take a deep breath and try to get my thoughts in order so I can try and explain what’s going on to my best friend. “Well, I quit my job yesterday.”

“Yes, you’ve said that. But why? ”

This is the hard part.

How do I tell Megan that misery has been suffocating me for years?

How do I explain it reached the point where I broke down yesterday when my boss asked me to cancel my scheduled PTO and have a new client proposal ready to present on Monday?

And how do I reveal it all escalated because of what a stranger said to me over three months ago?

I’ve done such a good job at hiding my problems for so long, it’s hard to admit them out loud. I sigh and murmur, “I needed a break.”

“Okay… I get that. You work a ton. But quitting is huge. How are you going to pay rent?”

“Well, actually, I’m not.” I lick my dry lips. “My lease ends in August.”

She lets that sink in for a few seconds. “So… you’re not renewing your lease?”

“No.”

“You’re moving away and didn’t even tell me?” The hurt in her voice pains me.

“Not forever. Just for the summer.” Honestly, I haven’t thought that far ahead. I just knew it felt like divine intervention when I realized my lease was ending so soon after I quit my high-paying job.

I’d packed a suitcase of clothes and personal items to last me a couple of weeks and hopped in my car this morning to go to the one person I knew would open the door for me without question: Dad. I have a month to figure out what to do with my furniture and other personal items.

“But where will you live?”

“With my dad.”

“In Dallas.” Megan connects the dots. “I see.”

“I just needed a break,” I repeat. I take the next right which leads me to the massive training facility where I’m meeting my dad to pick up a key to his condo. He hadn’t balked when I told him I’d be staying with him for a little while. If anything, he sounded excited.

“From work or your life?”

I scoff. “What life?” Megan knows better than anyone that work is my life.

Was.

Work was my life.

“Listen, Valerie,” my best friend’s voice loses its shocked quality and fills with concern. “If this is what you need to do, I support you one hundred percent. I just want to make sure you’re okay. It’s not like you to make rash decisions like this.”

Except this decision wasn’t rash.

Not really.

It’s been growing in my mind ever since a tall, handsome stranger planted it there three months ago. But Megan doesn’t know what happened between me and CJ, and I plan to keep it that way.

“Talk to me, Valerie,” my best friend pleads. “Just… tell me you’re going to be okay.”

I park my car and lean back in my seat, staring out the front window. “I know this all seems sudden,” I say softly, “but the truth is I’ve been thinking I need a change for a while. It all just came to a head yesterday, and I made the leap. I’m sorry I left town without telling you first. I just didn’t want to risk changing my mind.”

“I get it. I do. I’m just going to miss having you around.”

“I know. Me, too.” No matter how chaotic my work was, Megan and I always found time to catch up once a week. I’m going to miss seeing my best friend so often. “But like I said, this isn’t forever. I just needed a little break.”

“If you say so.” I can hear the disbelief in her words. “Just promise you’ll text me every day. I’ll need to get my Valerie fix somehow.”

“I promise.” I look across the parking lot and see a group of muscular men exiting the training facility. Their sweaty shirts and duffle bags hiked over their tired shoulders tell me they just finished practice. “I’ve got to go,” I tell Megan. “I’ll text you later.”

“You better.”

The call ends. and I’m out of my car and walking towards the building, smiling politely when I make eye contact with one of the men as he veers off from the group and approaches his car.

I’m steps away from the front door when the phone in my hand buzzes. I look down and frown before declining the incoming call. That’s the fourth time my boss has called this morning. If I had to guess, he didn’t believe I was serious when I quit yesterday. I sent my formal resignation letter to him this morning, copying HR on the email. I bet he’s calling to try to convince me to change my mind, but it’s too late for that.

The tight pain in my chest that’s become a consistent sensation in my post-college life isn’t gone, but it’s lessened significantly ever since I uttered the words, “I quit”. I’m anxious about what’s going to come next for me, but this anxiety isn’t the same as the feeling that used to leave me breathless right before I had to make a presentation for my superiors.

Is this how normal people feel?

I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t debilitatingly stressed about something.

I turn my phone on silent, tuck it in the purse hanging across my body, and step inside the building. I’m greeted by a friendly receptionist tucked behind a massive mahogany desk in the foyer. A security guard stands not too far away. I ignore his scrutiny and give my name to the young woman. Dad already gave security my name, so I’m handed a visitor’s badge and sent on my way to find his office within minutes.

The halls leading towards the coaches’ offices are empty, but loud music plays up ahead. I follow the sound to what turns out to be a state-of-the-art weight room. I only see a couple of men inside. I only spare them a glance, but it’s enough to notice that they’re each tall, buff, and broad.

I move away from the weight room, following the receptionist’s directions to find Dad’s office. I pass a locker room and am nearly knocked over by two children who come racing out of the room, bringing with them the musty aroma of sweat. I watch the young boy chasing after the girl, both of them giggling as they run down the hall. They turn left and disappear.

I have half a mind to follow to make sure they’re okay but think better of it. This is a secure training facility. Whoever their caretaker is clearly isn’t concerned with their safety if they’re letting them run around alone.

With a judgmental shake of my head, I continue on my way to my dad’s office. Most of the doors are closed in this hallway, but one is propped open. I approach and see my dad’s name on the placard on the wall. I knock on the door frame and step inside.

Dad looks up from his laptop screen, reading glasses perched on his nose. “Valerie!” He removes his glasses and stands, rounding the desk in two steps.

“Hey, Dad.” I walk into his open arms with a wide smile. Muscular arms wrap around me, and he lifts me off my feet. It’s the same way he’s hugged me ever since I was a preschooler, and I love it. Coach Nathan Palmer might look intimidating at six-five and over two hundred and fifty pounds, but he’s a giant teddy bear to his only child.

Dad holds me tight. “How are you? How was the drive?”

I wait until he puts me on my feet to answer. “The drive was good. Hardly any traffic. And I’m good.”

He keeps his hands on my shoulders but takes a step back to look me up and down. “You sure you’re okay? It isn’t like you to be so impulsive.” He sounds like Megan.

“Yes, I’m sure. I just needed a change. Working at the firm wasn’t good for me.” I shrug, hoping my nonchalance is convincing.

His frown tells me it isn’t. “Did something happen?”

Other than feeling like my soul was being sucked out of me and life was passing me by?

No.

Nothing happened.

“No, Dad.” I force my lips into a reassuring smile. The last thing I want to do is worry him. “Like I said on the phone, I just need a change. I plan to take some time to figure out what I want out of life.”

“I know. I just can’t remember the last time you didn’t have a plan or goal to accomplish. It’s not like you not to have direction.”

That’s the point.

My smile falters, but I will it to stay in place. “I’ll be fine. Trust me.”

“If you say so.” And just like that, the conversation drops. Unlike Mom, Dad doesn’t try to force his opinions on me. “Do you want a tour of the facility or do you just want to head back to the condo to rest?”

“I want a tour eventually, but I could use a nap.”

“No problem.” He digs in his pocket to retrieve his key ring. “I made a copy of the key this morning.” He detaches a silver key from the rest, along with a bronze one. “I haven’t tested it, so take both of these with you. I’ll be home by five if you can stick around until then to let me in.”

I take the keys. “Of course.” It’s not like I have anywhere to go or anyone to see. I hardly know anyone in Dallas.

Before Dad got the job on the Rough Riders, he was the head football coach at a small college outside of Houston. He worked there until I graduated high school even though I know a few NFL teams reached out to see if he was interested in joining their coaching staff.

I hadn’t realized it at the time, but Dad refused to consider those jobs until I graduated high school. And even then, he only took the job with the Rough Riders because it was in Texas. He’s always put me and my well-being before himself. I’m so incredibly lucky to have a dad like him.

I’ve lost touch with most of my friends from high school with a couple of exception, but they and my college accounting friends all live in Houston. I’m sure there is someone I know in Dallas, but I’m not interested in using this time to catch up with acquaintances. Especially when this city is just a pitstop on whatever path my life will take. I just need to figure out what that path is.

Take your time, Valerie. Don’t rush.

I listen to my inner voice and step forward to hug my dad goodbye when a screech fills the air.

I whirl around in time to see two small figures run past the open door. They’re the same children from earlier. This time, though, their giggles are replaced with angry shouts.

“Give it back to me, Andy!”

“Make me!”

“I’m going to tell Dad!”

“I don’t care!”

The shouting continues but fades as they move farther away.

“Geeze.” I face my dad. “Who are they?”

“One of our player’s kids.”

“I figured.” I resist the urge to roll my eyes. “But which player?”

“Jones.”

I purse my lips. The name sounds familiar. “Jones, as in your star defensive lineman?” I don’t keep up with the team’s roster, or football in general, but I’ve listened to Dad talk about the Rough Riders enough over the years to know the names of his long-term players, especially ones he is particularly fond of.

He nods. “Yes. That’s his little boy and girl. They’re good kids, just a little rambunctious.”

“Most kids are rambunctious.” I remember my high school days when I would babysit for people in my neighborhood. I even spent the summer between my senior year of high school and freshman year of college as a nanny for the young couple who’d moved in down the street. While kids have different personalities and energy levels, I’ve never encountered one who wasn’t a little rambunctious from time to time.

“Not you,” Dad chuckles. “What I would’ve given for you to let loose now and then. I worried you’d have a panic attack before the age of thirteen.”

I offer a half-hearted laugh. He doesn’t know how close to the mark he is.

“Well, I’m letting loose now.” That’s a nice way to put quitting your job and moving cities at the drop of the hat.

“I suppose that’s true.” He tilts his head to the side. “You really don’t have a plan for a job lined up?”

“Nope.” My lips pop at the end of the word, and I try to ignore the flicker of anxiety the admission sparks in my chest.

“Hm.” He rubs his chin and stares at the open doorway. “Are you opposed to working right now? Are you trying to take time off to reset?”

I ponder the questions. “No, I guess not. I just don’t want to work as an accountant.” Work wasn’t the problem. It was the lack of a work-life balance that wasn’t sustainable. And the firm that hired me out of college wasn’t interested in remedying that for its employees.

A sparkle flickers in his eye. “Well, then, I think I might have the perfect job for you in the interim.”

My brows lift. “Really?”

“Really.” He nods and walks to the door. “Do you have a few minutes before you leave? There’s someone I want to introduce you to.”

I feel exhausted, but I’m too intrigued to leave now. “Sure, I have a few minutes.”

“Great.” Dad is out the door and walking towards the weight room.

I follow, picking up my pace to keep up with his long strides. “Is this person in the building?”

“Yes. He’s a player on the team.”

“A player?” What job could a football player have for me?

“Yeah. It’s Jones, actually. He needs a nanny for his kids, and I think you could be a good fit.”

A nanny?

It’s a job I’ve done before, and before accounting, it was the best-paid job I’ve ever had. But it’s time-consuming. Or, at least it can be depending on the schedule the parents need.

“Why does he need a nanny? What does his wife do?”

“He’s not married, and the kids’ mom isn’t in the picture at the moment. Something about traveling with her new boyfriend. I don’t know the details, but I know Carter is struggling to find a suitable nanny to care for his kids while he works. Which is why they’re here. And why my star linebacker is struggling to focus on training for next season.”

I hear what Dad isn’t saying. Players need to be all-in during preseason training. If Jones is distracted, it doesn’t just affect him, but the entire team.

It’s not like I have anything else going on at the moment. It might be nice to have something to do while I figure out what my next career move will be. It will help prevent me from making a rushed decision out of boredom or fear. Idle hands and all that…

As I continue to work to keep up with Dad’s quick pace, I decide I’m open to helping out Carter Jones. Provided the hours are agreeable, that is.

Dad finally stops outside the weight room. The noise trailing out of the room tells me there are more people inside than before. Voices are shouting to be heard over the booming music.

Dad walks inside. I hesitate before moving to stand in the door frame and take in the sight before me. Over two dozen large, muscular men are spread throughout the room, working out as they talk and laugh amongst themselves.

Dad weaves through the crowded space with ease, slapping the backs and arms of different players he passes. Different men call out to him as he walks by, and all parties involved smile and laugh. My heart swells at seeing him look so happy. He worked hard to reach this level in his career, and I’m so proud of everything he’s accomplished.

Dad keeps moving until he reaches a man standing in front of the free weights, and my eyes land on the stranger. A hint of recognition flickers as I take in his broad shoulders and firm backside. My eyes shift to the mirror in front of him to see his face, and the air rushes into my lungs with my sharp gasp.

I know that guy.

Those strong, handsome features are forever imprinted in my mind.

CJ, the man who gave me the best sex of my life, is a player on my father’s football team. And I’m pretty sure my dad wants me to be his nanny…