Chapter 37

The fire crackled cheerily in the fireplace, casting shadows on his grandmother's face and making her seem older and more worn out than she usually was. Colin could tell from the look in her eyes alone that this was going to be quite a hard story to tell. That it was going to dig up past hurts that had long been buried.

But he needed to hear it because, after all these years, there were so many things he had been wrong about.

"Eleanor was fifteen when your grandfather hired Jacob to work in the stables as a groom," Lady Wellington began. "He was young, intelligent, and his family had come down on hard times, but he was educated much more than the average servant, and he had experience dealing with horses."

His grandmother paused and continued, "His father possessed some wealth, but as is the case with some gentlemen, he became addicted to gambling and squandered what little fortune the family possessed until they lost everything. After that, he did not even have the courage to face them and the poverty he plunged his wife and young son into. He hung himself in his study before the creditors could come and seize everything they owned."

Colin had learned as much from Daniel. Jacob Grantham had lived a privileged life until he did not anymore, and he knew very well how Society could turn against its own so cruelly the moment one fell from grace. That Jacob had the stomach to continue working in London spoke of his determination and ambition.

"Your mother loved horses and riding," Lady Wellington said with a soft smile. "And your grandfather was only too happy to indulge her. She has always been his favorite, as you very well know."

Colin nodded. Fortunately, his grandfather had passed on a mere two years before the tragedy at Blackthorn Estate.

At least he never had to deal with the pain of losing his favorite daughter in such a manner.

"In addition to all those traits, young Jacob also possessed some good looks, and he was quite the charmer. Your mother…" his grandmother trailed off with a sigh. "Your mother sadly fell for his charms, and they embarked on a secret relationship, with your grandfather and I being none the wiser."

A relationship between a young lady and a stable boy. It was definitely as bad as it sounded.

"She made her bow shortly, and after that, she caught the eye of your father." Lady Wellington smiled wistfully. "He was instantly smitten with her and begged your grandfather to court her the very next day." She laughed and shook her head. "He was very much like you in that manner, running off to Lord Brandon to ask for his daughter's hand in marriage. You would not like the comparison, but it is there. You are more like him than you want to acknowledge."

He scoffed. "But if Mother was in love with someone else, how did she ever consider marrying Father?"

His grandmother shot him a look that told him she did not appreciate being interrupted. He had done so over the years, mostly when she tried to tell him more about his parents. Now that he was the one asking for the information, Colin knew that she would not countenance being cut off again, so he immediately shut his mouth and waited patiently.

"She might have been in love with the stable boy, but she knew well enough that it was forbidden. So, she continued to keep up appearances, and I suppose that gave your father some hope that he had a chance of winning her heart. It was what he truly wanted, you know. He never wanted to force her into marriage."

How, then, did they end up getting married?

"A few months into the Season, someone leaked to the scandal sheets that your mother was seen with a man outside the manor after dark." Lady Wellington shook her head sadly. "It was young Jacob, of course, and he was convincing your mother to elope with him to Scotland. But if she did, it would have left a stain on our family so great that Adeline, your aunt, would have never been able to hold up her head in Society when she made her bow."

"So, she chose family?" Colin muttered.

"Oh, I wish it was as easy as that, but the scandal had already made its rounds, and within a handful of days, the callers stopped coming. Every single one of them steered clear of your mother, except your father."

"How convenient for him to suddenly step in," he muttered snidely. "Did you not think that perhaps he had a hand in the rumors himself?"

He would not have put it past his father to do such a thing.

"Oh no, no, no. It is not as you are thinking. You simply have not been paying much attention, have you?" Lady Wellington chastised him gently. "By this time, your grandfather and I had already learned of your mother's relationship with Jacob. It was bad form for a young lady to marry a servant, but your grandfather offered that to your mother."

"And did she take it?"

His grandmother shook her head. "No, because it was Jacob who made the decision for the both of them."

Colin frowned. "How?"

"You see, your grandfather agreed to the marriage between Jacob and Eleanor but with the stipulation that she would lose her inheritance. Young Jacob did not want that. He thought that by marrying your mother, he would be able to rise as the son-in-law of an earl. He was sorely mistaken in that aspect."

"So, he left Mother?" Colin was aghast.

The man was more horrible than he had initially thought.

"Not only that." Lady Wellington grimaced. "He managed to extract a sizable sum from your grandfather in exchange for staying away and keeping his silence on the matter."

Bastard, he swore under his breath. There was very little that could be worse than what this Jacob Grantham did to his mother.

"Jacob certainly had ulterior motives in courting Eleanor, but she would not listen to us. She was convinced that we had paid him off and never spoke to your grandfather again."

"Bloody damn," he swore softly.

Lady Wellington's eyes flashed fiercely at that utterance. "I will have you keep a civil tongue in my presence, young man."

"I am sorry, Grandmother. Do carry on."

He wanted to know just how his parents managed to marry each other with his mother still pining after the man who deliberately used her and broke her heart.

"Eleanor had become somewhat of a pariah by that time, but that did not stop your father. He was madly in love with your mother and was determined to save her as long as she agreed to it."

Colin was surprised. "She did?"

Lady Wellington nodded. "She did, and your father claimed responsibility for everything that had happened to her. Shortly after the wedding, it was leaked that the man who had been with Eleanor was the Duke of Blackthorn all along. Overnight, your mother was reinstated to her former glory—even more so now that she had become a duchess."

"But she never forgot this Jacob Grantham, did she?"

"Sadly, no." His grandmother shook her head. "And to make matters worse, he contacted her just shortly after Evelyn was born."

"Why would he do that?"

"Because he had all but squandered the money your grandfather had given him, even though it was enough for him to live on for at least two decades," she told him simply.

"The sheer audacity!"

"Absolutely!" Lady Wellington agreed. "This intermittent correspondence of theirs caused your father endless worrying. It became the cause of a great rift between them until… well, you already know what happened."

He sucked in a harsh breath. From his conversation with Daniel, he had a vague idea of the problem that came between his parents. He had not known it was this bad.

Or that he would actually feel some sympathy for the father he once hated.

Still, there was one question he had been meaning to ask his grandmother ever since he found out the truth.

"Was this the reason they fought the day of the fire?" Colin inquired softly.

Lady Wellington sighed. "You have to know that a fight between your parents was not the cause of the fire, Colin. Your mother had been driven mad with grief when she learned of Jacob Grantham's demise. She set her rooms on fire herself."

* * *

It had been hours since his grandmother had left him to ruminate on the truth about the past, and Colin still could not sleep. He remained seated before his desk, the letters from Jacob Grantham stacked neatly before him.

His father had not killed his mother after all—he had gone in to die with her.

It was her heartbreak from losing the man she had loved with all her heart that had driven her insane with grief. The same man who knowingly used her for his own selfish means.

His father's angry outbursts had not been born out of rage and jealousy but the frustration he was forced to endure as the woman he loved more than anything else in the world sacrificed bits and pieces for a man who was too selfish to ever love her back.

Colin did not know if he would have the same patience and compassion his father had displayed throughout the years if he had been in his place.

In the end, he had misunderstood the man who had been the Duke of Blackthorn. If he was ever so fortunate, he would grow to be half the man that his father had been.

Instead, he had spurned the one woman who selflessly gave all of herself to him. If Richard Fitzroy could see him now, he would probably be so disappointed in his choices.

Unlike his father, though, Colin still had the chance to change everything. He could still beg for Alice's forgiveness and spend the rest of his life making it up to her. If she wanted him on his knees, groveling from this moment until the end of time, he would do it.

But how was he going to start? How was he going to make up for all the heartache he had caused her?

If she turned him away without even seeing him, she would be well within her rights to do so.

And then, he remembered something.

He stood up and strode over to a bookshelf behind his desk. His hands gently caressed the spines of several rare books, the cheapest of which would fetch a price that could feed a small family for a year or two. He stopped at a particular book, bound in dark leather.

He smiled. It was a private translation—one that he actually had a hand in crafting.

It was a paltry gift, yes, but it would do for a start.

In the middle of the night, just a few hours before daybreak, Colin lovingly wrapped up that particularly rare edition.

It would be a miracle, though, if Alice did not fling it right back at his face.