Chapter 31

CHASE

She stands beside the car with Levi and Devin for a few seconds talking because they walked us out. Devin opens the car door as she slides in.

"You all right, bro?" Dev asks.

"Yeah, I'm good. Thanks for letting me know about her."

He nods. "Anytime."

"Brooke, remember what I said, okay?"

"I will," she says quietly.

The car door slams shut before they begin to walk away.

"You okay?" I ask.

"Yeah, I just needed to work things out."

"And you've done that? Here, with them?" I can't help but sound like a jealous fucker. She used to come to me when she was upset, but now…

She sighs before turning to me. "I was angry with you."

"Are you still angry with me?"

She shakes her head, "No."

"You can't keep running away, Brooke." I reach out, caressing the side of her face. "This is meant to be me and you in this together, but you're distant when I upset you. You need to learn to talk to me when you're upset or when I hurt you because if you don't, then this isn't a relationship. It's friends who fuck. It's that simple, and I don't want that for us."

"I know, me either. But you don't talk to me either. You're hiding stuff from me, and you talk about distance, but you're the one that's keeping it there too."

That storm is coming—it's on the horizon.

"You know I'm trying to keep someone safe."

"That's always your excuse, Chase, keeping people safe but it doesn't work, does it? Nate, Harper…they're caught in the crossfires. They're the ones that suffer, and me…"

"What about you?"

"I…I lost Nate. I lost my best friend, the guy who was always there for me. He's dead, Chase, and you don't talk about him. It's like you're trying to forget all about him. I say his name, and you flinch."

"I can't, Brooke…you think I don't know it's my fault he got shot?"

"He's dead. He's not just hurt or away…he's dead, Chase, and you act like he's not. You're so focused on everything else you can't see the people hurting because of it."

"You think I can't see it, Brooke? That I didn't hear my mom cry herself to sleep every night for two weeks before she couldn't take it anymore? That instead, she's decided to numb her pain with prescription drugs? You think I don't see the disappointment in my father's eyes that Nate is gone because of me? Or how about you? How you left because you couldn't bear to be around me? You think I don't remember you telling me you hated me for Nate and that you blamed me?"

The last line falls from me, and I stop, seeing her recoil. I didn't mean to say all of that, let alone that last bit, but she has a way of pushing me in a way I snap.

"Okay…that's good…you're talking," she says.

"I don't want to talk, Brooke. I don't want to sit here and cry about my feelings because my brother is gone, and I treated him like shit for years."

"So, what do you want, Chase?"

How do I even begin to answer that? I run my hand over my jaw.

"I just want to get you home."

"Okay, then let's go."

She buckles in her seat belt, and I start the car in silence. The engine roars to life, and I drive, occasionally flicking my eyes to hers. She's annoyed, I can tell. It's not hard to figure out with her scrunched-up nose and her arms crossed. I have to keep this secret just a little longer, and then when she has all the information, well then, we can talk and figure all of this out.

I pull up at her house, and she looks over to me. "I thought you said we were going home?"

"Yeah, this is your house, isn't it."

"My house isn't my home, Chase, not anymore. Your place is my home."

My heart pounds hearing her say that even when things are tense with us.

"You mean that?" I ask, still in shock.

"Chase, you're my home—you're my heart. No matter what's going on between us, that will never change. And let's be honest, I spend more time at your place than mine anyway."

"Move in with me? Fully, I mean. Let's go pack your stuff up and make it official. You don't need to go back to the dorms in September. I'm only half an hour from campus and…"

She cuts me off, pulling my face to hers and kissing me. I don't feel anger in this kiss; I love her, and she loves me.

"Of course, I will," she says as she pulls back, smiling. "But I don't think storming into the house right now and declaring I'm moving in with you when my parents don't even know we're dating is the best idea." She giggles, and god, have I missed that laugh.

"Fair enough. But you'll do it? Move in full time?"

She nods, grinning. "Absolutely. I just need to talk to my parents first in the right way. I should probably tell them we're together first."

"You think they'll be okay? I am a lot older than you…"

She laughs. "You're making it sound like you're an old pervert or something."

"Maybe I am, Princess…"

She laughs again, and its music to my ears.

"You know you have to stop making these big grand gestures whenever I'm upset." She grins.

"Well, I'm impulsive—what can I say!"

She rolls her eyes. "Just drive. Your girl is hungry."

"Well, actually…" I know I look sheepish. "I'm actually meant to be having dinner with the guys tonight, but you can come if you want?"

"If you need guy time, it's fine. I can just hang out and watch TV or something."

"Why don't you invite Harper around for a few."

She sighs, going quiet.

"What happened? She's angry at me, I guess…"

"Well, you did beat the shit out of her new boyfriend."

"He hit you."

"Accidentally! And you went all caveman on him before that."

"I don't trust him."

"I'm not sure I do either, but it doesn't matter anymore."

"They break up?" I ask, starting the car up.

"No, she ended our friendship today. She knows I'm hiding something from her, and she doesn't want me in her life anymore."

"Oh baby, I'm sorry, but I'm sure it was just a fight, and you girls will be back getting up to mischief in no time."

"I hope so."

I start driving us, upset that we've driven a wedge between her and Harper. This shit affects everyone, and god knows I know that better than anyone. Asher is broken, Jax did a stint in juvie for a few months, and Nate…well. My girl has now lost both her best friends. We need to find this Deacon and soon. We cut the head of the snake and the body flounders. I'm done messing around now. No one else gets hurt.