Chapter 31

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

HARPER

T he boys have gone out to get supplies for tomorrow, leaving Brooke and me alone after much arguing that nothing was gonna happen to us. It was me telling Ash I needed time with Brooke alone that sealed the deal.

So here we are in her house, in a gated community, surrounded by over one hundred cameras with guns on the table in front of us should we need them. It’s actually kinda funny when you think about it.

“How are you really, Harper?”

I smile at her. “There’s a million ways for me to answer that question.” I lean back against the couch. “I’m okay. I’m dealing and when I’m with Asher, it doesn’t hurt as much.”

“You two finally seem in a good place.”

“I think finally being honest helped. I got to see him be vulnerable with me, and even though I don’t agree with his methods, I understand why he acted that way.”

“I wanted to tell you everything—Asher, what really happened with Nate, everything. It just wasn’t my secret to tell.”

“I get it. I do have a question, though. When did you become so comfy with the psycho?”

“Levi?” She laughs. “I wouldn’t say comfy is the word, especially after that call.”

“Okay, familiar then.”

“He’s been training me, but it’s more than that. He helped me accept this new part of me. The part that will do anything to keep her friends safe. I guess after I thought I had lost Nate, I went a little dark. I took Jax’s phone and found a few of them, killed them. Then, coming back to you and the guys, I just struggled figuring how to mesh those two pieces of me together. The brothers have been helping me through it. I’m guessing you’re going through the same thing.”

I shake my head.

“I know who I am, Brooke, my problem was I couldn’t make others see it. I’ve changed—become tougher because I need to be, but there is still me inside. I’m just…more somehow.”

“That’s how I feel now. I’m glad you got there.”

“Me too.”

“Harper, I am sorry.”

“You all keep saying sorry to me.”

“That’s because we are.”

“I know, and I’ve forgiven you. It took me a while to get there, but I need you, Brooke. I need all of you.”

She throws her arms around me, squeezing me tight.

“Well, good because I’m not going anywhere.”

I laugh into her shoulder. A couple of tears fall from my eyes, but they’re not the same as before. They’re happy tears. Happy because I have my family back.

“Let’s make a promise now. We don’t hide anything anymore from each other.”

She pulls back, looking at me. “Deal…and since we’re being all honest with each other…” She smirks, “It’s time for payback, dish up…you and Asher…”

I grin. “About time, huh?”

“Have you guys… I mean…”

“Yeah, we have. The first time was?—”

“First!”

“Yeah,” I say, laughing. “It’s not just been once. Have you seen him? The boy is fine.”

“So…details!” she shrieks, crossing her legs on the couch waiting to hear.

“Well, he started slow with me, like he checked in a lot, making sure I was okay the whole time.”

Her eyes go wide, “Damn, the boy did good.”

I laugh, nodding. “Yeah, he did good. Does good. The guy knows how to, well…”

“What?”

“He goes down on me,” I say, blushing. “And uh, every time I, well, you know.”

“Have an orgasm?” Brooke laughs, “You can say it, you know.”

“He told me earlier I was driving him crazy, and he was trying not to get rough with me because of what happened.”

“Do you want that?”

I nod, “I do… I don’t know if I’m ready yet, and he’s okay with that, but it’s something to look forward to, right?”

Brooke takes my hand, nodding, “Yeah, it is. You have to at your own pace.”

“Yeah, and he’s really good at that. Part of me wants him to lose control, though.”

“Oh, Harper, it’s not about losing control. It’s about him taking control. When Chase gets in that mood, he gets all dominating and assertive. I swear it makes me weak for him.”

“So, the brat name.”

“Oh my god, you know about that?”

“Asher kinda hinted.”

She blushes, “Sometimes I call him sir when he gets like that. It’s pretty hot.” She laughs.

“Is it like BDSM stuff?”

“Maybe sometimes. It’s not like he puts me in leather, but then I don’t really know about that stuff, but he’s definitely more of a dominant guy.”

“Has he…erm, well, Asher made a comment about how he was trying not to fuck my throat.”

“Fuck, he’s like that too?”

“Seems like it.” I can’t stop the smile on my face.

“Well, yeah, Chase has done it before—taken that control from me. I dunno, it makes me feel sexy somehow, more powerful. Just submitting to him like that.” She shrugs. “It’s hard to describe.”

“Does it hurt?”

“No, not at all. It can take a while to adjust but it’s more passionate, I guess. And he’s still all about my pleasure too and then after, he takes really good care of me. He just gets, I dunno, vulnerable with me. Does things like put me in a bath or just spend hours holding me.”

“That’s really sweet.”

“It’s needed, honestly. Sometimes, our sexual activities,” she laughs, “can get very intense. But they’re also incredible.”

“How were you a virgin a few months ago and now you’re educating me on all this shit.”

She shrugs, “Hey, blame Chase, the guy is kinky.”

I groan. “Is it bad I wanna try that stuff with Asher? I dunno. I feel like after what happened to me, I shouldn’t. Those guys weren’t gentle like Asher, and it makes me feel ashamed of wanting him like that.”

“There’s nothing, and I mean nothing, to be ashamed of Harper. It’s not at all the same things. You should talk to him about it.”

“Maybe I will.”

At that point, the door opens. Brooke immediately launches forward, grabbing both guns from the table and pointing them toward the door. The way her reflexes kick in makes me realize how much she’s really gone through.

“Whoa, what the fuck B? It’s just us.” She lowers the guns as Jax starts laughing.

Chase walks over to her in just a couple of strides. “That’s my girl,” he whispers, clearly proud of her, kissing her and not caring at all that we’re here.

I look at Asher and he’s looking right at me, not them, a smirk playing on his lips.

He drops the duffel bag he has in his hands on the floor, walking over to me.

“We got everything we need. Tomorrow will go according to plan.”

“I know.” I nod, “Thank you.”

Brooke smiles at me, happy for me that I’m finally finding peace.

“So, I was thinking, Saturday night…maybe we could go out? All of us? Blow off some steam,” Jax says and as I glance at him, he offers me a smile and nods just slightly. He’s spoken to Nate and clearly has my back.

“Well, I think that’s a great idea,” I say.

“Me three!” Brooke cheers.

“I see how this is, all conspirators, the lot of you!”

We all laugh, and for the first time, it just feels at ease with all of us. Like we don’t have the weight of the world on our shoulders.