Chapter 15

A Very Heathen Bishop

S igurd had spent the rest of the morning in varying states of undress lying on top of a mound of blankets and furs. I spent the same time frustrated and angry at the sight of his nakedness. I wanted him by that fire, but he insisted on talking about nothing but rules and laws. His head seemed to be healing well, although it was now peppered with bruising. I wanted to knock more sense into him. Though he was not drunk, he vomited more times than I care to remember. After he spewed, he would bark commands at me, propped on his good arm.

‘You will tell Thorkell?’

I sighed. ‘Yes, my lord.’

‘Tell him that it is you who speaks for me.’

‘But Sigurd,’ I pleaded. ‘I have not been your wife more than a few days, surely they can be trusted not to burn your kingdom to the ground in your absence?’

‘It is you who should have the final say, and this is just for a few days.’ He tried to sit up again but his colour paled beneath his beard. ‘They cannot see their Jarl a pathetic weakling. I would not trust them to lay claim to my Jarldom before the sun sets.’

‘I know nothing of your laws.’

‘You do not need to. I will tell you everything you need to say. I just need to stay hidden for a few days.’

‘I do not think -’

The knock saved me from repeating myself again. Behind the door, Halldora waited patiently, holding Ligach.

‘Lady Olith,’ she said, breathlessly, basket on her hip. ‘We are going fishing. Would you like to join us?’

‘I am sorry I…’ I looked back at my husband. Pale and exhausted. Knowing that once I left the room he would have to stay and there would be nothing he could do about it. ‘No, I would very much like to join you,’ I said as I closed the door on Sigurd who looked as though he were just about to protest. ‘It is Sunday, I need to attend church.’

‘The women are fishing and most of the men and the shield maidens will be training.’ He nodded towards the mead hall. ‘They will not trouble you. Go through the gap that runs along the home of the seeress, through the gate and that will lead you to the clearing. There are a few trees, but Bishop Fintan can be found giving his lengthy sermons there. I will be down on the shore waiting for your return.’

I looked at the girl Sigurd had given me, with her pale hair and moon face. Ligach could always pass for a Dane, she was as defiant as she was strong, and she came to think of herself as a Dane. Not a Pict. She was always wild and free, as angry as an adder and as spirited as a wild horse. Right then, I thought if I could just find somewhere that we might be alone, that we might talk, we might find some common ground. That was if she could be trusted. Back then she hated me as much as she hated the Danes. Maybe more.

It truly felt like a gift to be allowed to explore the lands alone, at least the most alone I had been since I had arrived on the isle. I held tightly onto Ligach’s bindings making my way in the direction of the clearing. I could not let the Danes see that I was weak and that I would allow her to roam free, that would never do. The cacophony of noise from the shore fell away the further we moved into the sparse tree line.

‘You’ll be takin’ me to sacrifice me, no doubt.’ She spat. ‘To yer new heathen gods. All you savages know to do is to steal lands built by better men.’

I tried to ignore her and pushed on. The ground was soddened with peat and heather, becoming slippery underfoot the higher we climbed.

‘Will you be quiet? Someone will hear you.’

‘Marrying a monster like that,’ she hissed at me. ‘Your offspring will be an abomination. Soul’s as black as the Danes. Children twisted and–’

Monster. By that time, I had met many monsters. Each of them with a different face. Some were in the guise of priests who wanted me to undress for them. Some in the guise of my father’s kinsmen who came calling for a pretty face to bed. Some took the shape and form of beatings from my mother when I did not please them the way I should. My husband as far as I could see was no monster.

I turned on her. ‘Would you listen?’ I said through gritted teeth. ‘You will not say another word about my husband. I am trying to help you, but by God, you are making it difficult.’

Her mouth slammed shut.

‘Finally, you listen.’ I breathed. ‘It looks like we are here.’

The clearing was a simple modest affair, not like our churches. It was covered in a carpet of purple heather and wrappings of twisted honeysuckle.

I sat Ligach down on a nearby boulder.

‘We are going to have to trust each other if you ever want to survive this.’ I held tightly to the bindings to keep her still.

She stared at me blankly, jutting out her chin and pulling her weight at the bindings. ‘Why would I want to talk to a sour-faced heathen bitch like you?’

‘I was forced into this marriage by the Laird King Malcolm, I know you’ll ken his name very well.’ I tried to stop my voice from raising. ‘I intend to return to Atholl and retrieve my sister. If you can behave yourself for more than a moment, I’ll be taking you with me.’

I finally took a breath.

She was silent for what felt like a long while.

‘Why should I believe you?’

‘What would I gain from lying? You are already injured, and you are already one of my husband’s thralls. I do not need to lie to you.’ I stared at her, hands on my hips. ‘Would it help if I removed your binds? Mebbe I could look at that injured hand?’

I would never be able to thank Ligach for the friendship she showed me. For her good counsel. We were rarely apart after that. I think it was that which kept both of us alive.

‘Now, if I take these off will you behave yourself?’

‘Aye.’

I started to unravel the bindings which were leaving red welts. ‘You mustn’t stray far. We’ll be safer together. How were you injured?’ I said, gingerly untying the bloodied, filthy piece of fabric that bound it to her chest. Where her hand should have been there was a bloodied stump. Whoever had done it had cleaned the injury and bandaged it.

‘As they docked their ship, I managed to escape. I took off running along the beach. I whipped up the shale like arrows, but I was too exhausted. They soon caught up with me.’ She held up the missing hand. ‘This was my punishment. I would have been better dead.’

?

We sat a while with only the birdsong between us. Ligach rubbed at the redness of her wrists and I was lost in my thoughts of what my husband would do when I finally returned. I still hoped that he loved me for my wild spirit.

It was a rare day when it did not rain. Wisps of clouds danced shadows across the carpet of purple heather. From where we sat, we could see back through the circle of houses to the flock of women busying themselves catching fish.

‘You are lucky that they had only taken your hand.’

‘What do you know?’ she said bitterly.

‘I know what it is to lose your freedom,’ I said, finally, not looking in Ligach’s direction.

‘It is not the same.’

‘No, perhaps not.’ I smiled to myself. ‘But I do know that you can still live a fulfilled life. A life with purpose.’

She snorted. ‘Aye, it is a difficult thing to have a fulfilled life when you have food and ale at your table and a roof over your head. When you are not fighting some Laird who is on his quest for more land.’

‘You think I do not know? Why do you think my father sent me here? To look pretty on the Jarl’s arm? To play the lute and give him children? I may not be fighting with a sword and a garron, but I am fighting to keep peace at our borders.’ I sat next to her. ‘So I may well have food on my table but do not presume to tell me that I do not know what it is like to fight. What it is like to not be in control of your own life. What it is to be an outcast.’

‘Poor wee princess Olith.’ Ligach laughed scornfully. ‘Am I supposed to feel sorry for ye?’

‘No. But as far as I can see we are the only two Picts here and if nothing else, we need to trust each other. I promise I will get you back to Atholl and I can set you free, but you will have to give me time.’

She nodded. She was bad-tempered and sullen, but it felt good to no longer be alone. Ligach craned her neck and peered towards the shore.

‘You’d better get on wi’ it, they’ll be looking for us soon enough. Do you ken the sermons? You speak Latin, aye?’

If my father’s priest had heard my poor Latin, he would have prayed for my forgiveness all over again, but Ligach would never suspect, and I knew enough to make it sound believable.

‘Well enough that I might be able to help us observe our Sundays, there seems to be no sign of this priest.’

Ligach bowed her head. I crossed myself.

‘This dai haveth ure drihten maked to gladien and to blissen us,’ I began.

Then, the crack of a branch. The rustle of foliage underfoot. Heavy and slow as if something ancient had been awakened from its slumber. I froze. All I could think of was that my husband had come to find me. Furious that I’d disobeyed him. I felt Ligach’s hand reaching out for comfort. The clearing seemed to hold its breath.

We listened.

I pressed my hand firmly to hers to quell its shaking.

A shaven-headed, fleshy man appeared at the edge of the clearing, wearing the furs and finery of the other Danes but it was a face I had not seen in the Mead Hall.

‘Lady Olith.’ He bowed his head. ‘I did not believe some of the rumours of your arrival.’

Ligach squeezed my hand tighter.

‘You do not have to be afraid.’ He smiled, revealing a tiny cross hanging from a leather cuff on his wrist. ‘We share the same God. I am Father Fintan.’

‘Were you taken from the mainland?’ I asked, as though the Danes had been casting nets and sweeping up Picts.

He laughed. ‘Do you believe the islands were uninhabited before the Danes? We were here long before the Danes were.’

My childhood had been my mother’s fireside stories, talking of Picts that had been grasped and absorbed by the Danes. I had just assumed that the northern isles were no different and that they held them for themselves.

‘The Danes have been here a long time. Sigurd’s father ruled before him. A good Christian man, but Sigurd prefers the old ways and the old gods. They rule here now.’

‘Do you have to stay hidden?’ I whispered. ‘Does Jarl Sigurd know?’

‘So many questions.’ He gave a deep hearty sigh. ‘Jarl Sigurd spared us. I was the bishop of Orkney. The Jarls of Norway are eager to convert Sigurd’s Jarldom to Christianity. They want Odin and the Aesir back beneath the mounds, but Sigurd will not allow it.’

‘My apologies, Bishop Fintan.’ I did not know what else to say.

‘We are permitted to practice our faith, but not in the open. Jarl Sigurd will not risk the wrath of the old gods with failed crops and storms.’

‘Father, how have people survived without their faith to guide them?’

I was pious then. At least I thought I was. I had tried to live a good life. I tried to let God see my strength. I prayed that he would reward me. He never did.

‘We do what little we can.’

‘But surely that cannot be enough?’

‘It is all we have.’

‘Father, Ligach and I.’ I beckoned her. ‘We were about to observe the Lord’s Day service, from the little knowledge I have. Would you please say a few words, allow us a confession?’

He shook his head. ‘Jarl Sigurd has been good to us. I do not want to anger him. I do not believe he would be happy about it.’

‘Father, do this for us. Allow us to observe the Lord’s Day and I will make sure that my husband is more lenient when it comes to our faith. Surely, he cannot expect his Christian wife to denounce her religion.’

I felt the urgent tug of Ligach at my elbow. I did not know how I would make Sigurd agree, but I had no choice. We had to be allowed to observe our faith. In my young head, I could not live in a place where I was not free to follow the light of Christ.

‘To try would be madness. I would simply be punished.’

It was then that my husband’s words came back to me. I stood a little straighter and spoke with as much conviction as I could muster. ‘Jarl Sigurd is currently ailing and has agreed that I am to rule in his absence. I will decide whether I can or cannot observe my faith. Pray for us father.’

He sagged. ‘I will give you Benediction.’

We all bowed our heads.

‘May our Lord Jesus Christ be near us to defend us, within us to refresh us, around us to preserve us, before us to guide us, behind us to justify us, above us to bless us, who liveth and reigneth with the Father and the Holy Ghost, God forevermore. Amen.’

We all made the sign of the cross.

‘I am grateful for your great courage, Father.’

‘Now I must leave. I look forward to speaking with you again, Lady Olith and you too, Ligach.’

‘And I you, Father.’

We watched him disappear back the way he’d come. I could feel Ligach at my side. The silence uncomfortable between us.

‘Is that true?’ she spat on the floor. ‘It’s you who rules?’

‘Aye. It is.’