Chapter 53

She's here. Daisy is right in front of me. I want to reach out and touch her. I want to pull her into my arms and tell her that everything is going to be okay. But I'm frozen to the spot, my eyes glued to the bundle she's clutching to her chest like a lifeline.

A baby. Daisy is here with a baby in her arms.

"Let's go to your room and talk," she says and walks towards the stairs. I look at Vin. He knew about this.

"Just hear her out, bro," he says in a hushed but pleading tone.

I follow Daisy. Up the stairs and to the bedroom. The door closes softly behind me. I don't know what to say to her. I've had all these ideas of how seeing her again for the first time was going to go. Her showing up with a baby was not in any of the scenarios I made up in my head.

"He's yours. In case you were wondering," she says. "Luciano De Bellis. I wanted to give him a name that meant something." She looks down at the baby before peeking up at me again.

"What does it mean?" I ask her.

"Light. Because he was the only light I had in a very dark time," she explains.

"Why didn't you tell me?" It's hitting me. Hard. She went through nine months of pregnancy, childbirth, and everything else alone. Without me. I should have been there.

"You wouldn't see me, Gabe. How was I supposed to tell you? Pass a note to one of your brothers and hope like hell you'd actually read it? Never know if your silence meant you didn't want us? Or if you were just too stubborn to read it in the first place?" She sits down on the end of my bed.

I walk over and kneel in front of her. "I'm so fucking sorry, Daisy. I did this to us, and you will never know how sorry I am…" My hands land on her thighs. "I… How old is he?"

"Five months," she says. "I'm sorry. I know this is a bombshell."

"It is, but that's not your fault." I shake my head and swallow back a myriad of emotions. "We have a son." I reach up to brush a fingertip across his cheek.

"You want to hold him?" she asks.

"I don't know how…"

"Here. It's not hard." Daisy shifts to move the baby into my arms, and he starts crying and squirming.

"What's happening? What's wrong with him?" I ask, panicked.

Did I do something wrong?Did I hurt him?

"He's okay. He just doesn't know you yet," Daisy says. "Shh, it's okay, Luciano. This is your daddy." The baby soothes a little at Daisy's words. She places her hand on his back.

Holding him in one arm, I wrap my other around her shoulders and pull her against me. "I have a son."

"You do."

"I love you," I whisper. "I just… I need you to know that."

"I love you too," she says. "But I get it if this is too much, Gabe. You're just getting your life back, and you didn't sign up for a kid."

"I don't know how to be a father, but I'll read whatever I can, and I'll learn. I promise I will get this right. For you and him," I tell her.

"You're home now, right? They can't take you back?" she asks, and I can hear the hesitancy—the fear—in her voice.

"I'm not ever going back." I kiss her lips. Lightly. Still unsure if it's something I can do. "I promise I won't do anything that could have me back there, Daisy. I'm going straight."

"Where do we go from here?"

"Home. Well, we might need to stay at my brother's place for a few more days. Ours doesn't have any furniture," I tell her.

"I didn't want to live there without you," she says. "And I didn't want you finding out about Luciano from someone else. I also didn't want you to find out when you couldn't be here."

"I'm so fucking sorry you did this all by yourself."

"Vin helped, a lot."

"I wish I could have been there. I would have given anything to be there. You should never have had to do it alone."

"It's done. Can we start our forever now?" Daisy asks with a fresh hope sparkling in her eyes.

"We sure can." I lean down and kiss her again. "I fucking missed you so damn much."

"You're going to have to work on the cussing." She laughs.

"Sorry. Shit, fuck, don't listen to that," I tell my son. My son… I have a fucking son. "What do we need?" My eyes bounce around my bedroom, which is not the least bit kid-friendly. "He's going to need stuff, right? A crib, other baby… stuff?" I don't even know what the shit's called.

"We'll be fine for a couple of days. He's usually next to me for most of the night anyway," she says. "He's fussy. He doesn't sleep through the night yet, and he soothes easier if he's close to me."

"Yeah, I know the feeling."

"I'm really happy you're home, Gabe, but if you ever cut me off from seeing you again, I'm going to… I don't know. But it won't be pretty," Daisy threatens.

"It was wrong. I just hated seeing you in that place surrounded by filth," I tell her. "I thought it would be easier for both of us if you didn't visit."

"It wasn't easier."

"I know." I hold her closer to me. "You are the reason I finally get to live my own truth, Daisy. I don't have to lie anymore. I don't have to pretend to be someone I'm not."

"What do you mean?"

"I've never wanted to be part of this life. I did it because I didn't think I had a choice. But I'm making a choice anyway. I refuse to be that person anymore. I promise you I'm out."

"I would support you no matter what you did, but I'm not going to lie and say I'm not relieved to hear that. Being away from you, it's not something I want to experience ever again." She sighs.

"Me either." I look down at my son. "I don't want to miss another day with the two of you."

"Then let's go shopping tomorrow and furnish our home so we can finally start our lives together."

"Let's do that." I lean down and press my lips to hers again.

This woman is my whole fucking world, and now she's given me the best thing anyone could give another person. A child. A piece of her and me, combined to make one tiny human.

The future is looking up for the first time in a very long time. And it's better than I ever dreamed it could be.