56. Memories

Chapter fifty-six

Memories

*AURELIA*

T he weeks fly by, and Arden and I manage to sort through all of his and his family's possessions. He is still grieving, but after a talk with Eric he seems to be doing a bit better, or rather, he doesn't ignore his grief anymore and allows himself to mourn his brother.

I still feel like there is more I could say or do for him, but then I try to remember Mom's words and stick to her advice. Arden has never pushed me away, even in his darkest moments, so it seems I'm not doing it all wrong. I just hope I am the mate he needs and someone he knows he can rely on when things are tough.

When Arden returns from his latest meeting with Eric, Leila, and Emilien to wrap up the case surrounding Night, I'm already sitting on our bed, my legs crossed while I go through some documents.

"Hey, my angel." Arden climbs onto the bed and hugs me from behind. "Why are you naked? Not that I complain, I wish you were always naked."

I grin. "Always? Like when we go out or have a meeting?"

"Well, always when it's just the both of us."

"I took a shower," I explain. "Then I remembered I wanted to sort these documents and didn't bother to put on clothes."

"Hm," Arden hums and takes the documents out of my hands.

I turn around, opening my legs to wrap them around his middle.

"I can't believe how hot you are," he mutters, his eyes gazing at my body. "I can't believe I was blessed with you as my mate. With someone who is so brave and smart, and kind and beautiful."

"If your plan is to turn me on, it's working," I tease.

He shows me his cute, crooked smile before tugging off his shirt. I impatiently wait for him to undress. Once he is naked, I wrap my arms around him, turning us over so that he is on top of me. During the last weeks, we explored each other's bodies and started to get more and more accustomed to what the other likes. It's just amazing. I had sex before but was never in a relationship. To explore my sexuality like that, my own body, but also someone else's, is just magical and truly intimate.

I love it when Arden pays attention to my back and neck, and he enjoys it when I touch his chest and legs, and his ass. I make sure to grope it while he thrusts into me. I enjoy it so much to be with Arden like this. It's like I fit perfectly into his arms, and he in mine.

We cuddle for a long while after our lovemaking, just comfortable with each other. Arden kisses me softly. "I can't wait to see your home," he says.

I perk up at his words. It's the first time after Vander's passing that he has voiced he is looking forward to something. "It's a wonderful place," I say. "They will all love you."

"I honestly am curious to see for myself that pack life doesn't need to be bad," he admits. "Meg wrote me a message, you know?"

I smile. "She did?"

"Yes, she is fitting in well there. It got me curious," he admits. "Listen, Aurelia," he says after a while. "I know I haven't been easy to be around the last couple of weeks."

"Arden," I mutter before he can continue. "Don't do that."

"I want to," he says. "I… just wanted to tell you how happy I am that you were at my side throughout it all. You were so patient and understanding, and just there. It meant more to me than words can describe."

I let his words sink in before snuggling up against him. "I love you, Arden," I say. "You are my mate. I told you a while ago already, I am here to stay. It was completely out of the question not to stay at your side through these dark weeks."

"I hate to be a burden," he says quietly.

"You were not a burden," I assure him. "We will face many challenges throughout the rest of our lives, and I know we will always be able to rely on each other. I don't see it as a burden. If roles were reversed, would you?"

"No, I would never view helping you as a burden either," he admits. "I might need you to be patient with me for a while longer," he adds. "Vander's birthday is approaching, and I'm already terrified of the date."

"Why don't we celebrate his birthday?" I offer. "I don't mean with a party or anything. But why don't we do something in memory of him? Something he would enjoy? We could do that annually to keep his memory alive."

Arden stares at me, his eyes glistening, but he smiles. "That's a beautiful idea."

It's another couple of weeks later that we wrap up Arden's last belongings here. We have already sent a couple of boxes to Silverlake, but it's been far more than anticipated. Also, I wanted Arden to be able to say goodbye properly.

"Is this your mom?" I ask Arden while we go through one of the last pieces of his parents' belongings. For weeks, he hasn't been able to look at any photographs of his family, but he's slowly starting to face certain memorabilia again.

"Yes." He smiles as he scoots closer. "That's shortly after Vander was born."

"Then, you are the little boy next to her," I say. "Aw, such a cutie. Look at that little pout of yours."

Arden smiles. "I wasn't happy at first about having a little brother," he admits. "But, once Mom and Vander were back home, I fell head over heels for him." He shows me a photo of all four of them—his father included. "Happier times," he mutters while he looks at the picture thoughtfully. "Why did you have to ruin everything, Dad?"

"Have you heard anything about him?" I ask quietly.

Arden shrugs, pretending like he doesn't care. "Eric said his trial is up ahead. He fucked up big time, that's a fact. Eric told me Dad didn't want any of us to die and that he is devastated by having lost Vander. He just wanted to get back at the Council, which is why he started to help Night. But I still don't understand. Sometimes I want to go to his cell and ask him why he did what he did. Why he hated me so much, and why it was such a disgrace to him to have a child with a disability. I have so many questions."

"If you want to face him and ask him," I say, "you know that both Eric and I would stand one hundred percent behind your decision."

"I have thought about it," he admits. "But I don't think I will do it. I don't think there is anything he will tell me, or at least nothing of value. What kept him going until Mom died was the mate bond, but once that was severed, he just saw us as a burden from his former life. I tried to excuse and explain his behavior, but the fact is he was already a narcissist when Mom was still around. He would constantly berate her for smaller things, pretend any argument was her fault, made promises he didn't keep, and always saw himself and his own feelings first. He hated it when Mom, Vander, or I cried because he thought we were manipulating him with our tears." He shakes his head. "The funny thing is how shocked he was when Vander died. He never thought that his action would have such severe consequences." He takes my hand. "I think I'm better off not visiting him."

I lean my forehead against his. "I understand where you are coming from," I say. "Promise me you will do what feels best for you."

He nods. "I think living the best life possible will piss him off the most."

"Then let's make sure we piss him off as much as we can," I say.

Before we can continue our talk, Beta Jules knocks at the door. He has a difficult standing in the pack at the moment, but I have to give him credit for working his ass off to lead them until a new alpha takes over.

Eric is already looking at several options. Many alphas have more than one child, and with only one of them being able to inherit their own pack, there is a lot of potential in the younger siblings.

"Do you have a moment, Arden?" Beta Jules asks.

"Yes, of course." He turns to me. "Excuse me for a moment."

"Sure, I wanted to give my parents a call anyway," I say. I want to set a date for Arden's and my return to the pack with them and see if I missed anything on my checklist for Arden's move.

To my surprise Dad doesn't pick up, which is unusual because it's his working hours. I try Mom next, but she doesn't answer either. My last resort is Beta Vincent, who finally picks up.

"Aurelia," he says, sounding breathless.

Maxima's senses are on alert instantly. "What happened!?" I ask.

"Listen…" Beta Vincent blurts out. "I… okay, it's just recent news. I don't want to unsettle you."

"Goddess, Vincent," I groan. "Unsettle me now and tell me! If it's so urgent, I can't believe Nox didn't tell me yet."

"It's all still a secret," Vincent admits. "Only the Luna and Alpha, and I know." He pauses. "Okay, I will tell you, but if your dad gets mad at me for telling you and worrying you, you are going to protect him from kicking my ass."

"Vince!"

"The twins are missing," he blurts out. "Fuck, Aurelia. They were visiting Liam's pack, and it seems like Beta Dante's niece… she was being followed. From what we know Felix and Dario tried to escape with her. We are still looking for them."

I don't know what to say. Cold dread is filling me, and I'm unable to do or say anything. My two little brothers! Potentially hurt with their whereabouts unknown. They don't have their lycans yet. Like Vander didn't have his, which is the reason he didn't survive being shot.

Oh fuck!

"Aurelia," Vincent begs. "Talk to me." There is rustling on the other side, and I can hear Vincent talking to someone.

"Aurelia?" Mom's voice suddenly reaches me, waking me up from my spiraling thoughts successfully.

"Mom!" I blurt out. "What… Felix and Dario! Goddess, I need to come home immediately. I need to help. Tell me what I can do?"

"Sweetheart, they are alive. I know it. I can feel it. Your father, Liam, and I are doing everything to find them." She pauses. "In no way will I let anyone take one of my children from me," she says, and for a split second her voice sounds dark and angry before softening again. "Believe me. We are doing everything." There are more voices in the background. "I have to hang up now, Aurelia. There is a new lead."

"Mom," I beg. "Keep me updated."

"Of course. I will tell you immediately once I have news," she reassures me before hanging up.

I am not reassured at all, though. It's like my heart just froze in ice-cold fear.

Arden returns right at that moment, eyeing me in worry. "Aurelia, did something happen? I could feel it through our bond."

"No," I mutter. He didn't need my worries now. He has enough of his own. I try to keep my emotions in check. "It's just…"

"Don't do that," he begs. "I can feel something is wrong.

"I don't want to burden you with my worries when you have so many of your own," I admit.

"You said it yourself. We are a package deal," Arden says. "Tell me, please. It's not a competition, and your pain matters, too."

"My twin brothers got attacked and are missing," I mutter, recoiling at my own words. Saying them aloud just made it so much more real.

"What?" Arden gasps. "Goddess, Aurelia, that's horrible!" He hurries to me and pulls me into his arms. "Can we do anything? Do you have any details? If there is a way for me to help, then I will do anything I can."

"Mom said they have a new lead," I say, trying to convince myself. "Seems like I can only trust them for now."

Arden seems to look right through my fake confidence because he just hugs me tighter. "I refuse to believe that the Goddess would take another brother from us," he says quietly.

"How is that logical?" I dare him.

"I know I'm not being rational right now," he says. "But I've learned over the last couple of weeks that not everything can be rationalized. And I want to have hope that your brothers are safe and have faith in your mother's words."

His words are weirdly soothing to me. They don't chase my worries away completely, but they lessen my panic. Dario and Felix are my little brothers, and they have always been particularly close to me because they are closer in age to me than I am to our three older brothers. In a household full of alpha pups, it was always refreshing to have these two around. They tend to see things lighter and aren't that serious.

Dario is very smart. He is probably our very own little prodigy, while Felix is very athletic and can adapt to new situations fast. "I want to have faith too," I tell Arden. "Not just in my parents, but also in my brothers."