Chapter 9

CHAPTER 9

***SIMON***

S imon hadn't thought about Emma in years and was a bit surprised to find that the wound from losing her was still a little raw. "She taught me the real meaning of love," he said, then sighed. "We were only seventeen, both seniors in high school. I don't think either of us expected it to last, because we were headed in different directions once we graduated. I was off to Harvard, she was going to Cal-Tech, but who knows, things might have turned out differently if my parents hadn't interceded and put an end to the romance."

"Oh, Simon, that's terrible," Kira said, her eyes full of compassion. "You must have been devastated."

He was silent for a second, the memory of the night his parents stormed into his dorm room suddenly fresh in his mind. "They showed up one night in the middle of the week, I'll never forget it. The conversation only lasted a few minutes," he said. "They threatened to cut me off when I turned eighteen if I didn't stop seeing her, promised to get Emma fired and her scholarship revoked if they heard that we were still seeing each other, then walked back out of the room without even giving me a chance to say a word. I did what they wanted; I didn't have any choice. They would have followed through with their threats; nothing is more important to them than appearances, and their son couldn't be seen dating someone so common."

"They sound like horrible people," she said, reaching out and covering his hand with hers, sending a wave of electricity shooting through him. "Did you tell Emma about their threats?"

He nodded, that memory especially painful, "She understood, but I think it broke her heart. It definitely broke mine," he said. "I decided after that that I'd never fall in love again, that I'd just use women for my pleasure and skip the emotional entanglement. After all what was the point, I'd just be forced to marry someone I didn't love eventually. At the time, I didn't realize that my reckless behavior would give me such a bad reputation that none of the elite families in our circle would even consider letting their daughters near me. Now I'm the black sheep of the family, the one who will never make a good marriage, the one who fritters away his life chasing women and spending his parent's money. I didn't really set out to become this way, I guess it sort of just happened over the years. At some point, it stopped being an act, and I became that horrible person who almost killed you on the boat yesterday."

Kira studied him for a second, "I'm sure glad that you didn't," she said, smiling at him. "I would have missed this wonderful dinner."

"Does that mean that you forgive me?" he asked, his mood lifting instantly. "It was a selfish and dangerous stunt, and I'm never going to do anything like that again."

"I forgive you, Simon," she said. "And I'm sorry you went through all that with your parents. I've gotten a little glimpse of the man under all the hurt and anger, and maybe you should try to find a way to let him out more often."

"You really think so?" he asked. "To be honest, I'm not entirely sure who I am if you strip all the money and good looks away. I've been relying on them for so long, I'm not sure who is inside me."

"It sounds to me like you have a lot to figure out," she said. "It won't be easy, but I think you can do it. Tonight, has been so nice, Simon. It shows that you can think about someone besides yourself, so don't give up."

He studied her for a second, "You know that you're the first woman who hasn't fallen for me, you're the first one to see through me," he said. "I'd really like to find out why that is. Maybe we could have dinner together again or something."

Kira didn't say anything at first, and his heart fell, "Simon, as nice as this has been, I don't want to give you the wrong idea," she finally said. "I said we were friends because I don't know what else to call this, but I'm not interested in anything more, I'm not a vacation romance kind of person, and something more long term between us would be impossible. Dinner was wonderful, but I think I should get going. It's getting late, and I have another sailing lesson in the morning."

"So that's it?" he asked, watching her get to her feet. "We just say goodbye and never see each other again? I opened up to you, Kira, I thought that meant something."

"It meant a lot, Simon. You're learning to be vulnerable," she said, then leaned down and gave him a quick kiss on the lips. "Your secrets are safe with me, I promise. Maybe we'll run into each other around the island. I hope you find a way to become the man that you're supposed to be."

He watched her walk away, disappointment making a cold spot form in his stomach, then got to his feet and went inside, leaving the table just the way it was. Flopping down on Max's couch, he closed his eyes. All the work and effort had been a waste of time, Kira still didn't want anything to do with him, even if she had forgiven him. The one woman he wanted for more than just her body didn't want him, and there was nothing he could do about it.

Just then the front door opened and Max came in. He took one look at Simon on the couch and groaned. "What did you do?" he asked. "How did you screw up this time?"

"That's just it, I didn't screw up, and she still left," he said. "I even told her about Emma, and it didn't make any difference. She said we're too different and that too much separates us. For the first time in my life, my money and social status are a bad thing. She's not impressed by either, and that just leaves me, and we both know I'm not much of a man."

Max sat down next to him, "I'm sorry, buddy," he said. "But what did you expect to happen? Did you think she'd sleep with you? What was your end game making dinner for her?"

"I wanted to apologize, that's all," he said, then paused, the truth slowly settling over him, and he let out a long sigh. "I guess that wasn't all, deep down I was thinking about getting her into bed. I've been thinking that was everything for so long I can't help myself. I really am a creep, and I don't know if I'll ever be able to change."

"You're expecting too much too soon," Max said. "You didn't get this way overnight, so you can't expect to become a different person instantly. I'm sorry to tell you this, but it's going to take time."

Feeling completely deflated, he looked over at Max, "You know what? I'd give it all up, the money, the social standing, even my good looks, if it meant that Kira would give me a chance," he said. "I've never met a woman like her before. She's sexy and smart, and I could tell that she was really listening to me tonight. No one has ever taken the time to do that."

"Wow, you've really got it bad," Max said, shaking his head. "I think I'm going to call it a night. Feel free to crash on the couch if you don't want to go back to your cabin."

"Thanks, I might just do that," he said. "It's been a long day, and it didn't quite turn out the way I planned."

***Kira***

When Kira woke the next morning, the weather matched her mood, grey and rainy, and it was clear that she'd be spending the day inside. After tossing and turning most of the night, her dreams filled with images of Simon, the thought of being left alone with her own thoughts was less than appealing. She felt guilty for turning him down this time; he'd opened up to her, and she'd rewarded him by turning her back on him, something she never would have done under different circumstances.

It was her attraction to him that was standing in the way, the one thing holding her back from spending any more time with him, but she'd discovered the night before just how hard it was to control. She'd been so sure that she'd learned her lesson, but when she was around him, even when she wanted to slap him, the desire was there, throbbing away, making her feel slightly crazy. It had been easy to ignore those feelings when he was being a jerk, but now that she'd gotten a glimpse of the real man, there was no ignoring them, and that meant she had to stay as far away from him as she could.

Hating the wave of disappointment that washed over her, she got out of bed, angry and frustrated with herself for letting a man ruin her perfect vacation, especially since she wasn't even sleeping with him. It was time to stop thinking about Simon. She was here to rest and relax, to get ready for all the changes coming in her life, not to obsess about a man she'd never see again after she left the island.

Mary Beth was in the kitchen, her laptop open in front of her when she walked in, "Hey, I thought we were supposed to be on vacation," she said, pouring herself a cup of coffee. "What are you doing working?"

Mary Beth shrugged, "We're not going outside today, so I thought I'd just check in," she said. "Max got me an hour of internet this morning, and I didn't want it to go to waste. Besides, today is the day the insurance company is supposed to wire the money from the settlement into your bank account. I just wanted to make sure it's there."

"Oh, I forgot," she said, plopping down at the table. "I can't believe it slipped my mind, I really have to get myself together and stop thinking about Simon. This is ridiculous."

"Last night must have gone well," Mary Beth said, grinning at her. "Did he kiss you?"

"Did he kiss me? Mary Beth we're barely friends. Of course he didn't kiss me, that would have been easy to handle," she said, then sighed. "He was a perfect gentleman, he even opened up to me about his first love, and well……some other stuff. He was way too human last night, he didn't make one rude remark the whole time, and he can cook, Mary Beth. I never should have gone over there last night; it was a big mistake. Now I think I like him even more."

"So, what's wrong with that?" Mary Beth asked. "There are worse things than liking a man, and if you like him that means you can sleep with him now."

"Is everything about sex with you?" she asked with an exasperated sigh. "Let's just change the subject, okay."

"Fine, I won't say another word about it, but you're missing out," she said, shaking her head. "I got an email from my secretary, the paperwork from the court is ready. She's going to run down to the courthouse and pick it up this afternoon. The judge signed off on everything you wanted, sole custody of Kiley, a generous amount of child support, and the restraining order against Virginia. He did give Edward one supervised visit a month, but he has to come to you, and he has to come alone unless you approve it ahead of time."

"So, it's really over?" she asked. "That's the end of it."

"Yep, you won, Kira," Mary Beth said, smiling at her. "You showed that bastard he messed with the wrong woman."

"We won, Mary Beth. I couldn't have done it without you," she said, a huge weight lifting off her shoulders. "A year ago, I thought I was going to lose my baby. Instead, she's all mine, and I have everything I need to give her the best life possible."

"Seeing Edward pay for what he did to you was the most fun I've had in a long time. He was a real piece of trash; I still can't believe he served you with custody papers the day you gave birth," she said, shaking her head. "I'm just glad I was in that room with you. The jerk might have gotten away with it, and I can't even bear to think of you and Kiley being separated."

"Well, thanks to you, that will never happen," she said, then sat up. "We should celebrate, do something fun, or eat something really bad for us."

Mary Beth looked out the window, "As long as we can do it inside, I'm in," she said. "What did you have in mind?"

"I don't know, but we won't figure it out hanging around here," she said, getting to her feet. "I'm going to go get dressed. Let's make a run for the village, maybe that will spark our imagination."