Chapter Eight

“I f Tessa invited you to the lecture, why can you not go with her?” Seth asked as their carriage pulled up before the lecture hall. He hoped to escort Blythe inside, locate Tessa and hand his sister off and depart.

“I am afraid that I will want to leave, especially a lecture, and would not want to inconvenience our cousin, especially since her husband will be with her.”

Seth would rather spend the afternoon doing anything but attending a lecture on astronomy.

“Once I am more comfortable being out in Society again, I will no longer ask you to accompany me,” Blythe promised.

“I do not mind. I just wish we were doing something far more enjoyable.”

“You never know. You might just like the lecture.”

He snorted as he stepped from the carriage, but quickly amended his opinion when he saw Frances standing with his cousin, His Grace and Lady Bethany.

After assisting Blythe from the carriage, he offered his arm and led her to Tessa, though his eyes were on Frances.

“Since when did you develop an interest in astronomy?” he asked his cousin.

“My interest is in the audience.” She grinned then walked toward the entrance followed by Frances and Lady Bethany. He and Blythe followed.

“What did she mean by the audience?” he quietly asked Blythe.

She paused and looked up at him with a small smile. “I realize that you have only just rejoined Society, but certainly you know what our cousin has been up to.”

“I have no idea, other than she married the Duke of Ellings a few months back.”

Blythe laughed. “I will let her be the one to explain.” His sister then let go of his arm and quickly caught up with the others, leaving Seth to stroll behind and wonder what she had meant. By the time he joined them, they were already seated. Unlike yesterday, there was not an empty seat beside Frances as she was seated between Blythe and Lady Bethany.

He paused and was about to sit when Blythe stood. “Please change places. The man in front of me is quite tall and I cannot see over his head.” She then settled in a seat behind someone shorter, leaving the space beside Frances free, which he quickly claimed.

“It is a pleasure to see you again, Miss Hawthorn.”

“Lord Seth,” she nodded.

For the shortest time yesterday she had been friendlier, but quickly recovered. He could only hope that in time she’d be less cold to him.

“Is astronomy an interest of yours?”

“No,” she answered.

“Then why are you here?” Not that he minded.

“Likely the same reason as you. Lady Bethany asked me to join her and I am certain your sister begged you to bring her.”

He frowned. “Yes, she did.”

Frances huffed and crossed her arms over her chest.

“What is wrong?” he asked quietly.

She glanced in one direction and then the other before she stood and turned to Lady Bethany. “I find that I am developing a headache. Thank you for inviting me, but I am returning home.” Frances then marched away, leaving those who had come with her staring at her departure.

“I leave you in the care of Tessa,” Seth said to Blythe.

“Where are you off to?” Blythe asked.

“To look after Miss Hawthorn. She seemed rather upset, and if her health is failing, I would hate to see her come to further harm because she is unaccompanied.”

It was an acceptable excuse but he suspected they all knew that Frances did not have a headache, unless that is what she considered him to be. A wise man would let her leave and accept her rejection, but Seth already acknowledged that he was a fool and had been for far too long and he was also determined to have Franny back in his life.

“I will see you at home, then,” Blythe offered and appeared unconcerned when she had practically begged him to bring her here today in the event she was the one who needed to leave.

He dismissed the oddity and hurried from the building where he found Frances on the walk, nearly stomping away and he hurried to catch up to her.

“What is the matter?” he asked.

She whipped around and pinned him with a glare. “Do you not find it odd that after we met at the masquerade, we have found ourselves at the same functions two days in a row?”

“I assumed that it was a coincidence.”

“Is it a coincidence that they manage to seat us beside each other?”

What was Frances implying? Did Blythe have an ulterior motive for wanting to attend this lecture and Astley’s Amphitheatre yesterday?

“This is your fault, you know. If you would have danced with others at the masquerade then they likely would have not noted that we danced twice.”

“Why should it matter?”

“Because your sister, cousin and Lady Bethany have decided to become matchmakers. The very thing Her Grace and Lady Bethany would resent if it was done to them.”

He certainly had no argument with their efforts. “Are you certain?”

“Yes,” she nearly yelled. “I overheard Her Grace and Lady Bethany discussing how they, including Lady Blythe, would keep arranging these outings, forcing us together until you finally called on me.”

“I have asked to do so,” he reminded her.

“To what purpose?” she demanded. “They seem to think we would make an excellent match and apparently, your sister thinks it is time you wed.” She snorted. “They have decided on me when we both know they are wrong.”

“Are they?” he asked quietly.

Frances gaped at him. “Yes! If you recall, that was a decision you made five years ago.” By the time she was finished, Frances was yelling at him, something she had never done in the ten years that they were friends. Franny then marched away to hail a hackney.

Seth wanted to accompany her, but also knew that he was not wanted. But, as he watched the conveyance pull back into the traffic, he knew that was not the last conversation they would have on the matter.

As soon as Frances returned home, she went directly to her set of rooms and did not leave again until the following morning. She was still beyond irritated by the manipulations of not only Bethany, but Tessa as well.

Bethany had knocked on her door several times after she returned, but Frances claimed a headache, which they both knew was a lie, but she simply wanted to be left in peace.

Today, she intended to do nothing more strenuous than read a book. She was not leaving the house no matter how much Bethany may insist, and she had no plans for entertainment, especially since the salon would have guests tomorrow.

“Frances, you have a caller,” Bethany announced brightly as she entered the parlor.

She blew out a sigh.

“It is Lord Seth Claxton.” She grinned to which Frances returned a glare.

“Please have the butler tell him that I am not at home.”

Bethany’s smile fell. “I am afraid it may be too late for that.” Her friend then stepped aside so that Seth could enter the parlor.

When Frances had overheard Bethany and Tessa making plans before the lecture yesterday, she had stormed in and ordered them to cease interfering in her life. Just because they now employed her, and they were friends, did not give them leave to manipulate her life. They promised not to interfere again. Apparently, Bethany didn’t think a call from Seth mattered.

“Lord Seth,” Frances greeted coolly.

Why must he persist in wanting to see her?

“I shall ask Cook to prepare tea,” Bethany offered before she left them quite alone.

It was probably best that whatever discussion needed to be had was done in private.

“Why are you here?” Frances demanded.

Frances wasn’t certain where all her anger was coming from. It could simply be because she had not gotten nearly enough sleep these last few nights, or her friends thought they knew better for her, which was the reason she wanted to be away from her aunt, or because Seth was here and making her experience so many emotions that she had thought were long buried.

Without being asked, Seth crossed the room and settled on the settee across from her.

“Our discussion ended prematurely,” he said.

“There should have been no conversation to begin with. After all, that is what you had wanted if you ever saw me in London. You are the one who has broken your dictate.”

Frances inwardly smiled when he winced.

“I do not believe my cousin, sister, nor Lady Bethany are going to cease in their matchmaking given they were rather disappointed when I returned to the lecture without you.”

“Perhaps you should explain to them why there can be no match between us and then they can concentrate on another couple.”

“I do not think you want me to tell them of the ten years at the cottage,” Seth offered.

“Of course, you would not want anyone to know as it would save you embarrassment,” she bit out.

“I was thinking about your reputation.”

“Oh.” She had not expected that response.

“I am not embarrassed about what we shared.”

“So long as it remained in Laswell and was not revisited in London,” she accused.

“I was wrong. So very wrong.”

How dare he now decide that his rejection of her had been a mistake! Seth was sadly mistaken if he thought she could so easily forgive and forget. “It is a shame that it took you five years to realize your mistake,” she said right before a footman entered with a tea tray.

Frances reached forward and poured him a cup assuming that the way he took his tea had not changed.

“I have missed you and so many times I wished I could have taken back what I said,” Seth insisted after they’d once again been left alone.

“If that was true, you would have called on me when I arrived in London, but you did not.”

“I assumed you would want nothing to do with me.”

“Because you are a rake, rogue, breaker of hearts and scoundrel? If so, then you are correct.”

“But I am not,” he argued.

Frances arched a brow.

“Not any longer. That was the reputation of a much younger man.”

She couldn’t help but snort.

“I swear, I did not pursue any miss or lady. I did not even court them, but after a few dances or turns about the room, they assumed they were in love, or they believed I was, when I never even courted them.”

Tessa and Bethany had claimed the same after she had confronted them on their matchmaking. Frances had insisted that she wanted nothing to do with a gentleman of his reputation. They had claimed it was a result of nothing more than silly chits assuming they’d fallen in love with just the smallest encouragement. He had made no promises nor had he courted anyone. According to them, Seth had never asked permission to call on any woman.

They didn’t know that he had asked her and Frances was not going to tell them.

“That is not all,” she stated. “While I was living a naive existence in Laswell, still in love with you, and anxiously waiting for your return to be in your arms, and enjoy your kisses, you were gambling and visiting brothels.”

He glanced down and said nothing.

“You wished to have your bachelor freedom in London, one which I would remain ignorant of, while I waited for you in Laswell. Had my uncle not sold the estate, which forced me to move, it’s likely I could still be there. How long would you have continued with your deception, I wonder. Would you have eventually told me or would you have simply stopped visiting with no explanation?”

“I would have never stopped traveling to Laswell so long as you were there,” he insisted.

And she would have grown old waiting for his visits. “It matters not as when the time came for me to depart, you were very clear that you no longer wanted me as a friend or anything else.”

“I was mistaken,” he said again. “Not just mistaken, but so wrong about what I truly needed or wanted.”

Her heart skipped, or at least it felt as if it did before her pulse sped.

“There has been an emptiness inside me for five years.”

As it had been in her until she used anger and coldness to fill it.

“I am sorry, Frances. So very sorry.”

“Yes, so you have said, but you were my dearest friend and that rejection hurt far more than your breaking my heart. It cannot be forgotten.”

He reached out for her hand but she pulled back. “At least let me call on you. Let me prove that I have changed. I promise that I have.”

“We both have,” she said. “Who is to say we would even get along now?”

“Do we not owe it to ourselves to find out?”

Frances was torn, not certain how to respond.

Her heart ached to be what they were, but she was too afraid to trust Seth because that was not a pain she could live through again.

But, if he had changed and there could be a future, was she denying herself something wonderful? On the other hand, would she always be afraid that it would end and be unable to embrace the friendship as she had before?

“Please, Franny. Give yourself a chance to come to know me again, and me you. I do miss my friend.”

She missed hers. “I am not the same miss you left behind in Laswell. I am not certain she exists any longer.”

“Then allow me to get to know the person you have become.”

“What if I do not like who you have become?” she countered.

“I can only hope that you do,” he answered with sincerity.

“I need time, Seth.”

He stared at her for a moment and then nodded, placing his cup and saucer on the table. “I will give you that.” He stood. “I hope that you give us the opportunity to be friends again.”

Is that all he wanted? If so, could she simply be his friend when she had been so deeply in love with him? No doubt he likely had dozens of friends, whereas she had few. Except, the ones that she did have she fully trusted…or had until they decided to play matchmaker.

“Not just friends,” he offered quietly. “As I said, Franny, I was mistaken and I hope that I can earn your forgiveness.”

“To what purpose?”

“Why does any gentleman wish to call on a beautiful woman?” he asked with a smile.

“I would already know the answer if it was anyone other than you.”

He winced again, but one of the lessons learned with Seth was not to assume anything.

“I have changed, Franny,” he said again. “I have missed you and need you by my side. I hadn’t realized that you were the very thing missing from my life until I saw you sitting across the theatre.”

“You wish to court me?” she asked because Frances needed that clarification.

“Yes.”

Courtship usually led to marriage, the very thing she had hoped for five years ago. Did she dare risk her heart again?

“I will give it consideration,” she finally said.

He nodded one last time and then finally left.

With a sigh, Frances leaned back.

What to do about Seth?

Before that horrible day, he had been the most important person in her life.

Which was the truth? The ten years they were friends or the words he said the day he left her alone in the cottage to return to London.

Both, she answered herself.

Frances wanted to hate and resent Seth, which had been easy until she saw him again. Then they had danced and she looked into his eyes and all those former emotions came rushing forward.

What if after he had courted her, Seth decided that they wouldn’t suit after all, would she be heartbroken all over again?

Could she survive it a second time?

Maybe she should not even risk it.

Frances already knew what was important to Seth. He had wanted to earn his fortune, his own gaming establishment. Those had been the two things more important than her.

He had also vowed never to wed, so why would he want to court her now?

What did he really want from her? How did he see them in the future?

How much could she really trust him?

She couldn’t.

Frances would never be able to trust him again, which meant that there was no future, therefore, she needed to discourage him.

Oh, she also wanted him to court her but was afraid of what would happen.

She set her cup and saucer on the table before she stood. Sitting there while she weighed the options was getting her nowhere!

Except, Frances knew one thing—she did want to spend time with Seth no matter how ill-advised.

She wandered to the window to look down at the square where people were going about their day while emotions warred within her.

What was she to do?

When she’d first learned the truth about Seth, she had wanted revenge on him and thought it was impossible. But perhaps it was…

Despite how much her heart screamed to give him another chance, her mind remembered the thirst for revenge.

A heart could not be trusted. Not hers and certainly not his, which left her only one choice.

Frances would allow Seth to court her. They would become friends again and she would let him believe there was a future. And then, she would do to him what he had done to her. This would guarantee that Seth would never want to speak to her again, her heart would be safe from making foolish decisions, and Frances would have her revenge.