Chapter 3

THREE

Dust rose up from his truck tires as Falcon pulled up in front of Brody Hart’s house. Brody was the oldest Hart, the one who had taken care of all the Hart homeless truants when they were little, the reason they had all survived their teenage years.

Brody was also the one Falcon felt closest to, because it was Brody who reiterated the invite to move to the ranch every single week.

It would be Brody he would tell first.

Plus…he felt like he owed him the truth.

The front door opened as Falcon got out of his pickup.

Brody walked out, wearing jeans, cowboy boots, a Tatum Crosby concert tee shirt, and a dark brown cowboy hat. He looked every bit a cowboy, nothing like a billionaire tech genius who had once lived under a bridge.

“Falcon,” Brody said, jogging down the stairs to greet him. “You look like you’ve been in hell for the last month. You okay?”

Falcon nodded. He was tired. He was hungry. He was dirty. He’d come straight here from the mountain, which meant it had been almost forty-eight hours since he’d slept. “He’s dead.”

Brody stopped. “Did you kill him?”

“No. He was dead when I got there. New dead. Didn’t see who did it, but yeah, dead. There were pictures of the family there. Ranch, too. He knew about all of you. I burned all the shit. But maybe the guy who killed him knows about you guys. Maybe?—”

“Shut up.” Brody walked up to him and threw his arms around him. “Shut the fuck up, Falcon. Breathe.”

Falcon closed his eyes as the man he considered his brother hugged him. He hadn’t stopped in so long. Hadn’t stood still in so long. Hadn’t felt his soul rest in so long. But standing there in that driveway, he felt something inside him shift. Not rest. But shift.

He didn’t hug Brody back, because he didn’t know how, but he stood there, and didn’t step away.

Brody eventually stepped back. “We will absolutely take precautions in case anyone decides to show up, but I doubt they will. It was between you and him, and whoever killed him probably had their own beef.”

Falcon nodded again. Emotions coagulated around him again, and suddenly, he didn’t want to talk about it.

He didn’t want to tell Brody he was moving to the ranch.

Right now, he just wanted to see Bella. She was the only one who ever made him feel like there wasn’t a coating of dirt on his soul. “Bella over at the restaurant? Thought I’d go see if she needs help.”

Brody’s brows went up, and he gave Falcon a look. “She’s in Boston.”

“Boston?” Falcon was suddenly tired. So fucking tired. “When’s she coming back?”

Brody shrugged. “I don’t know. She went there to help out with Maddie and Kitty’s business. I think she’s planning to stay a while.” He sighed. “She’s been restless out here, Falcon. I’ve been watching it, and I know she’s gotta go. But I don’t like it.”

Falcon took a step back. “She’s staying in Boston?”

“Again, I don’t know.” Brody frowned. “You all right?”

Bella. In Boston.

All Falcon wanted was to stop running and park his ass on this ranch. Be with the horses. With the people who let him be. With the woman he’d loved for a million fucking years. “She’s staying in Boston?” he asked again.

Brody narrowed his eyes. “What’s going on with you? When was the last time you slept?”

“A couple days.” Falcon strode away, clasping his hands on his head as he stared across the vast lands of the Hart enclave. There were horses grazing. A state-of-the-art barn. And land that stretched into the horizon, a place where there was silence and peace, where noise didn’t ever enter, unless a man asked for it.

The place where Bella had made her home.

It had never occurred to Falcon that he wouldn’t be able to come back here, settle in, and find Bella. It had just never crossed his mind. This oasis had always been the humanity that had kept him from losing himself to the darkness all this time.

And she was gone?

“Falcon.” Brody’s voice was low. “You know the rules.”

Falcon knew the rule Brody was talking about. When they were homeless teenagers living under the bridge, Brody had instituted a rule that they never hid secrets from each other. They never suffered alone. They always shared their truth, no matter what. It had been that rule that had created the bond that had held them all together, because it made each of them realize they weren’t alone, they weren’t going to be judged, and there might not be an answer, but there was comfort.

Falcon had never taken the last name of Hart like the other nine, and he’d kept his distance on some levels, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t part of their inner circle. It also didn’t mean the rules didn’t apply, at least when it came to Brody.

So he answered the question. “I love Bella.”

There was silence for a long moment, and Falcon hardened himself. He knew what a fuck-up he was. Did Bella deserve more than him? Yeah. And Brody would tell him that.

“What else?”

Falcon turned to look at Brody, who was still staring across the horizon. “I said I love Bella. Not as a sister.”

“You’ve loved her since the first moment you met her,” Brody said, turning to look at him. “I wondered how long it would take for you to admit it to yourself.”

Falcon was stunned by Brody’s answer. “You knew?”

“Yeah.”

“Does she?”

“Not that I know of.” Brody paused. “She doesn’t want any man to fall in love with her, you know. She doesn’t trust love. Romance. Relationships.”

Falcon nodded. “I know.” He hadn’t worried that Bella would be taken, because he knew how completely she shut out love. But he hadn’t expected her to move away.

“So, what else is going on?”

Falcon smiled then, relief easing the ache in his gut. “I had this plan to move back here, build a house, see if I could win Bella’s heart, and then never leave the ranch again.”

Brody laughed softly. “Spoken like a man who has been outside the edges of functioning society for a very long time.”

Falcon rubbed the back of his neck, exhaustion beginning to weigh him down. “Yeah, well…yeah.”

They were both quiet for a moment, then Falcon grinned. “You’re not going to tell me to stay away from her, are you?”

“Nope.” Brody raised his brows. “She’s perfectly capable of kicking your ass to the curb if she feels like it. Bella doesn’t need my protection anymore. I’m not going to interfere in her life.”

Energy surged through Falcon, a new fresh energy he hadn’t felt in ages. Maybe ever. Was it hope? Acceptance of who he was? “I’m going to go to Boston, then.”

Brody smiled and nodded. “I figured as much. I’m not sure she’s going to move back here, though. Your dream of a life with Bella on the ranch might not be a possibility. You might have to choose.”

Falcon glanced at the horizon again, at the horses, at the land where the only family he had lived.

“Plus, she’s not the same person you’ve been dreaming of for ten years, the sixteen-year-old with a crush on you.”

Falcon nodded. “Yeah, I know. I’m not the same either.”

“No, you’re not.” Brody regarded him. “I love you, Falcon, and I love my sister. I want both of you to find happiness, but I’ll be honest, I don’t know that the two of you fit each other. You’ve lived in a world of darkness, revenge, and isolation for a long time. Bella isn’t in that place. She’s not that person. You can’t drag her into your darkness. You have to rise up out of it to meet her.”

Falcon ground his jaw. “I know who she is.”

“She’s more than what you’ve let yourself see. She’s light, love, and laughter.”

Light. Love. Laughter. God, that sounded good to Falcon. “I have an app on my phone that will fake a laugh for me, so I don’t have to.”

Brody raised his brows, and then grinned. “Shit. You had me for a second. I actually believed you.”

Falcon laughed then, a real laugh that felt good. “I’m ready for all that lightness, Brody. I need it.”

Brody inclined his head. “Don’t expect Bella to save you. It’s not fair to her. Save yourself and then meet her on equal footing.”

Falcon nodded. “Yeah, I know.” He hadn’t thought about it before Brody had brought it up, but he knew Brody was right. He couldn’t ask Bella to save him. She deserved more than that.

“Don’t settle for less than what Tatum and I have,” Brody said. “You’ll have to put the fantasy out of your head and see Bella and yourself for who you are today. And admit it if it’s not right.”

Falcon laughed softly. “Twenty years later, and you’re still preaching.”

“Of course I am. I’m a happily married man deliriously in love with his wife. It gives me street cred.” But Brody was grinning. “One more word of advice?”

“Sure.”

“Take a couple days here before you rush after Bella. Get some food. Get some sleep. Wash your clothes. Take a shower. Ground yourself. You smell like a sewer and look even worse. She’ll probably shoot you before she has a chance to recognize you.”

Falcon looked down at himself. “I think it shows true love to go like this.”

Brody raised his brows. “Bella doesn’t want love, remember? The last thing that’ll work for you is to show up there desperate, hungry, and dirty with a dozen roses.” He put his hand on Falcon’s shoulder. “Take a breath, bro. Just take a breath.”

Falcon inhaled deeply, but it didn’t calm his restlessness. “I need to go. Can I take one of the jets?”

Brody sighed. “You’re going to fuck it up before you even get a chance.”

Dammit. He’d waited so long. He didn’t want to blow it.

“At least take an hour for food, a shower, and some clean clothes. You can’t get on my plane smelling like that.”

“An hour?”

“Yeah.”

An hour. He could wait an hour. He’d waited ten years for Bella. What was one more hour?

An eternity, but also, nothing. Not to him. Not anymore. “All right. Feed me, bro. I’m starving.”