44. I’ll Be Home

forty-four

I’ll Be Home

Alessia

I screech to a stop at the bottom of the stairs, my breath catching in my throat. The floor beneath my feet feels unsteady, and I reach for the railing. Rainer is at my side instantly, gripping me so I don’t topple over.

“Is that…” His name sticks in my throat. I glance at Rainer, gauging how he’s feeling, because the body in Ken’s arms is his brother, clad in only his underwear. “Rainer?”

Pain flickers across his face before he goes blank. “Where was he?”

Ken jerks his head up. Blood streaks his face, and his hair is in messy waves around his shoulders. “From what I gathered, he was engaging in… adult activities with a human.” He sighs. “A guard—dead now—walked in on him biting the woman and stabbed him in the back. I found him like this.” His voice cracks. "Ty won't wake up."

Ty . It’s the first time I’ve heard Ken use the nickname, and it’s done almost reverently. A show of respect from the bear shifter.

My eyes flit to Tynan’s face. He’s unnaturally still, paler than usual. Despite the scars marking his face, he seems at peace. It’s the softest I’ve ever seen his features. I round the shifter, and my eyes search Tynan's back. Ken shifts him so I can see better. An ugly, gaping wound stretches. A new cut that will never have the chance to join the others as scars.

It’s stained with the color I am downright sick of seeing.

My stomach pitches, and I turn away, heaving. A violent anger courses through me, causing my shadow-self to buzz like bees beneath my skin.

“Gods dammit , Tynan!” Rainer slams his hand down on the banister, causing it to quake under the force.

“The salve,” I croak, taking deep breaths to keep my shadow down. “Get the salve.”

“Little demon,” Ken says softly. “It’s too late for that.”

“But… but this one is different. Trust me!”

He makes a soft sound in his throat. “No salve or magic will bring him back.”

"Yes it will!" I yell, balling my hand into a fist and slamming it down on my thigh. "It worked for Rainer!" Focusing inward, I direct my plea toward my shadow-self. "Get the feckin salve."

The males stay silent as a coil of smoky darkness heeds my command, evaporating from my skin and shooting down the hallway. Every second that drags by is a second too long, until finally, the tendril returns and drops the container of salve in my hand.

I open it, and step toward Ken. His face is grim as he adjusts Tynan, lifting him up so I can see the wound.

"You shouldn't have removed the blade," I say hoarsely, even though I know it's unfair. I smear the remaining bit of salve on his wound, forcing myself not to recoil at the cold feel of his flesh beneath my fingers. His skin knits together before our eyes. "He needs to feed. "

Before Rainer has a chance to respond—or stop me—I hold my fresh wrist wounds to Tynan's lips in offering, trying to lure him from his slumber. The blood no longer freely flows, but I just fed Rainer from the same spot.

It should work.

But Tynan remains lifeless. Ken shakes him, trying to help, while Rainer paces beside me.

"He's gone," Rainer mutters.

"If he was dead, he wouldn't have healed!" I say, my voice cracking. Rainer has lost too much—he can't lose his brother, too. I refuse to let him shoulder this guilt.

Closing my eyes, I hover my hand over Tynan's body. I think of what Enid said about us being spiritcallers. We can feel the spirit—the soul—right?

Perhaps not now , but Enid was a soulmancer. Could she have brought him back? If only the humans hadn’t stolen her power. If only they hadn’t slit Tynan’s throat. All of the ifs weigh heavily on me.

Quelling my mind, I focus on the energy emanating around me. When I block out the typical five senses, I'm left with a pulsating feeling. It's similar to the sensation of my shadow-self, except it wavers around me instead of within.

I can sense the various energy threads. Rainer's is apparent—because it's tangled with my own. It's powerful and impossible to ignore. Then, there's another sturdy pulse of energy. Ken's. I recognize it instantly.

Beneath them, if I focus very carefully, I sense another faint vibration. It's barely there, but it is there.

"He's alive," I whisper, my eyes whipping open.

"Little demon," Ken says sadly. "I'd hear his heartbeat if he was."

“I knew he was going to feck this up.” Rainer begins to pace, gripping his hair angrily. “I warned him about this shite!”

My chest hurts so bad I can barely breathe. It takes me a moment to realize my visceral response to Tynan’s death isn’t all mine—it’s Rainer’s . This is why it’s so intense.

I try to summon my love and gratitude for all the good, sending them down the bond to Rainer—anything to ease his pains.

I grip Rainer's arm, giving him a pleading look. "Trust me, Rainer. He's not gone yet. I can't explain it, but I can feel his spirit."

He sucks in a sharp breath and goes still, but he doesn’t face me. His face is scrunched in turmoil, the muscle in his cheek popping.

“At least he didn’t betray us,” I whisper. If he was knocked out, that explains why the glamour dropped. “He was loyal to you, Rainer. To us.”

Slowly, he turns to me. His eyes glisten, and wrinkles line his forehead. “Yet somehow, that’s worse.” His voice cracks.

A puff of air whooshes past us, and I turn. Ezamae drops into the space wearing a thick, fluffy, blue and silver robe with bare feet. His pale hair is a mess, and there’s a flush on his cheeks.

“Hello, friends,” he says, smiling. He glances at Rainer, and his smile drops. “What in the clouds happened to you?” He looks past us to where Ken stands on the stairs, holding Tynan’s limp frame. “Oh, no .”

“I am not in the mood,” Rainer mutters, putting his back to the Aer Prince.

“What happened?” he asks carefully.

“What didn’t happen?” I give a sarcastic laugh. “Rainer almost died—we finally bonded like you wanted—but now Tynan isn't waking up. I murdered an entire ballroom of humans.” An awkward silence stretches out. “Wait, I almost forgot. An ancestor of mine from centuries ago was kept prisoner by the human queen, whose own ancestors stole the throne from my ancestor, but it was really because she was kicked out of—”

“Alessia.” Rainer clears his throat. He holds out a hand for me, his rings glinting in the chandelier’s light.

My cheeks burn as I clamp my mouth shut to keep from stress-rambling. I place my hand in his, and he squeezes it. Just as I have his back, he has mine.

Ez studies us. Instead of celebrating like I expect him to at the mention of the consummation, he gives us a somber look. He places a hand on his chest and bows his head.

“Your brother was… not awful,” he says. “May he rest in solace.”

"He's not dead," I murmur. "We need Sera."

"Why her?" Rainer asks, heaving a sigh. "She can read auras. She'll tell you I'm right—he's not dead."

“You have the energy to take any of us back?” Ken says, hoisting Tynan over his shoulder. With the adjustment, Tynan’s limbs flop, his body still loose and limber.

I wince, glancing away in discomfort.

“I can take you all back,” Ez says.

“Her first.” Rainer jerks his chin toward me.

“I can take you all back,” he repeats, clarifying. “Together.”

“Wait… at once?” My brows shoot to my hairline. “To Avylon ?”

A small smile touches Ez’s lips. “I do recall telling you my power is much stronger than it had been. Now that I can come again, I—”

“Do not talk about your orgasms with my bonded,” Rainer snarls, lunging toward Ez .

I jump in front of Rainer, planting my hands on his chest. “Hey,” I say softly.

Ez sighs, adjusting the sleeves of his robe. “One might think he’d be a little nicer after draining his testicles.”

“His brother just died ,” Ken says exasperatedly.

"He's not dead," I whisper, but no one acknowledges me.

“He was not even fond of said brother," Ez says.

Rainer growls, stepping around me. “Shall I disembowel you and send you back to your brother, air-twat?”

“Whoa,” I quickly side-step to block Rainer again. “What has gotten into you? Ez is here to help.” I rub my forehead, as if I can rub away my exhaustion.

His gaze latches onto mine, and an apology crosses his face. He shakes his head, backing up.

“It’s the bond,” Ez says heavily. “I can personally attest to how it provokes strong emotions in the first few days.”

“Gods save us all,” Ken says. “It’s a damn good thing two fae can’t have the same bonded. Could you imagine what a bloodbath that’d be?” He chortles. “Laisren would love that shite.”

His laughter is cut short as he descends the rest of the stairs, shifting Tynan over to his other shoulder. A heavy silence fills the space again.

“Let’s just go,” Rainer mutters.

“What about the iron?” Ken’s confusion reminds me that he has no idea what transpired with Enid. “We’re not going to the mines? Our whole purpose—”

“I’ll fill you in back home,” Rainer says, setting his jaw. “I need to deal with my brother first.”

Ken nods as he steps up to our side .

“Grasp hands,” Ez says, gesturing toward us.

Since one of my hands is already in Rainer’s, I reach for Ez with my open one. Rainer huffs in annoyance, and I raise a brow at him. He shrugs, grabbing onto Ken’s hand. Since Ken has one arm around Tynan, Ez grasps his elbow instead.

“Hold on to your tallywackers,” Ken mutters, squeezing his eyes shut.

I do the same, readying myself for the jarring shift as gravity disappears and we soar through the ether impossibly fast. The next time I open my eyes, I’ll be home.