Chapter Two

Caspian

"What are we going to do about Rissa," Jude asked, using the nickname we gave her a long time ago. "Do you think she knows how we feel about her?"

I scrubbed a hand down my face, then sighed. "I don't know. We have to give her the space she needs." I came to my feet and walked over to the refrigerator. Our father had built the clubhouse years ago as a place for us to hang out. I think he just wanted to get us out of the way when he was doing business.

The big house was close, but we rarely went there, preferring the clubhouse. Not that I blamed our father for wanting to conduct his business in peace. We were pretty wild as kids, and weren't much better now.

Then we met Larissa. Larissa with the golden blonde hair that reached to her waist, her innocent violet eyes, and pouty lips I longed to kiss—our Rissa. I don't remember which of us gave her the nickname, but it stuck.

She became a part of our ragtag group, worming her way into our hearts. I couldn't imagine a world without her in it. She was the calm in our stormy lives. She brought peace and a world of sunshine to chase away the shadows.

Then something started to change. We began to care more and more about her, and it wasn't just as a friend. I'm not sure when we started thinking about her differently. But what girl in her right mind would want to be with three men at the same time? That was ridiculous. I wondered if my brothers were as worried as I was about who she might choose. Could we accept her falling for the other brother?

Jude made her laugh. Ezra gave her excitement. What did I have to offer? Only my love and protection. That might not be enough.

I had to take things more seriously, though—pull my head out of the fucking clouds—or my head out of my ass, whichever was the case. You couldn't be the head of my family and still be soft. My father had been grooming me for the position a long time.

I'm the one who didn't let Ezra take Rissa paragliding. Good Lord, just the thought of her jumping off a cliff scared the fuck out of me. I was the one who didn't let Jude pull her into his next prank, which would more than likely get them both into trouble. I was the stable one, which equated to boring in my book.

A siren echoed from far away as I pulled a beer out of the refrigerator and then closed the door. I twisted the cap off and tossed it toward the trashcan. It missed and went rolling across the floor. I picked it up, then put it in the trash. That was why I never played basketball.

I looked at Jude. "You want to know if she's guessed how we feel about her, and I don't know. Sometimes I think she does, but she's so damned innocent that I can't be sure. She's going to have urges just like any normal girl." I took a long drink of my beer, enjoying the cold rush of liquid hitting my throat. "So yes, she might suspect something," I continued. "But she's still so young that I doubt she realizes exactly what it is, and she might be confused by what she's feeling. As far as I know, she hasn't ever been with a man."

"If she only chooses one, we have to respect her wishes," Ezra said. "I think she wants me, in case you're wondering who she'll choose."

Jude frowned. "You're full of shit. Rissa and I think just alike. We're always finishing the other's sentences. Nope, it's me she'll pick."

"Or maybe she wants stability," I suggested.

They turned to glare at me and I laughed. I wasn't sure what we would do if something didn't change soon. We were all dying a slow death. We didn't just want to just fuck her. It went deeper than that. We wanted to be with her. It was a crazy-assed situation.

When my phone rang, I pulled it out of my pocket, glancing at the number. Why would Rissa's father be calling? A chill worked its way down my spine as I answered.

"Yes, sir?"

"Has my daughter forgotten the time? I know she's excited about being out of high school, and I probably shouldn't be checking up on her, but she did promise to be home at a certain time. I was getting a little worried, and she's not answering her phone."

I set my drink down and looked at my watch. She'd been gone almost an hour. It was less than half an hour to her home from the clubhouse. "She should've already been there. Would she have stopped somewhere along the way?" But I already knew the answer. She would've gone straight home. Before he could say anything, I continued. "We'll start your way. Maybe she had a flat or something. But you did you try calling her, right?" I was already walking toward the door.

"Yes, but she's not answering her phone. Sometimes the ringer is muted. Let me know what's going on when you find her. I'll stay at the house and call you if she shows up."

"If we find out anything, I'll call you immediately." I ended the call and looked at my brothers.

They were already coming to their feet. "What's up?" Ezra asked.

"Rissa hasn't made it home yet." I opened the door and headed out to my car. Ezra and Jude were right behind me. Jude climbed in the backseat, Ezra on the passenger side. No one was talking now as I started the car and backed out. We were all lost in our own thoughts. What the hell could've happened between the clubhouse and Rissa's home? It was only a twenty-five-minute drive.

"I just tried calling her. No answer," Jude said.

I grasped the steering wheel a little tighter. No, she was probably just fine. There was a convenience store at the turn-off. She might've stopped to get a soda or something.

We had plenty of sodas and every imaginable snack at the clubhouse. Still, I refused to overthink the situation and kept my thoughts away from ominous possibilities, like ones where Rissa might be hurt and need help.

She could've picked up a nail and had a flat. I remembered the sirens I'd heard earlier. It wasn't unusual to hear sirens in our area, I told myself. We had a few elderly neighbors. Anything could've happened to send an ambulance or firetruck to assist.

But why wouldn't she answer her phone?

"Something's on fire up ahead," Ezra said, pointing.

Flames created a hazy, gloomy light that danced over the slight rise up ahead. I could smell smoke that only grew stronger the closer we got.

"It's nothing to do with Rissa," Jude said with certainty, but his voice broke just a little.

As we topped the hill, lights flashed on the other side, bouncing off the trees. I quickly took in the scene: one firetruck, a rescue truck, and an ambulance.

I pressed my lips together as we got closer and saw a light-colored car on fire with the BMW emblem. I pushed a little harder on the accelerator, then came to a sliding stop, spewing gravel behind us as I pulled up beside the ambulance.

I quickly shifted into park and jumped out of the car, my brothers right behind me. Two patrol cars were just coming over the hill, their lights flashing and sirens blaring. The rescue crew already on the scene was busy pulling out the thick hoses from the firetruck, so no one stopped us. I wasn't even sure they noticed us.

I didn't hesitate as I ran toward the car, past the water that began spraying from the firehose. All I could think about was getting Rissa out. One of the firemen yelled at me to stop, but there was no way I wouldn't try to save her.

Leaning away from the flames pouring toward me from the busted window, I reached for the door handle. The blistering heat was unbearable, but I ignored the pain and clenched my teeth as my fingers wrapped around the scalding hot handle. I pulled on the door.

The body tumbled out, what was left of it. It was burned beyond recognition. Except for the little heart necklace around her neck. The one we had given her. I stumbled back, dropping to my knees, as I stared at what was left of Rissa—ashes and bone.

Without thinking, I reached down. She crumbled away when I picked up the necklace, gripping it tight. I barely felt the hearts branding the palm of my hand as I cried out my anguish.

"Noooo! God, noooo!"

I vaguely heard Ezra cursing and Jude wailing. Someone helped me to my feet, pulling me away from the fire. In a daze, I let the fireman lead me away. A paramedic bandaged my hands and applied a cooling salve to my face. I didn't even realize how badly I was burned. Nothing hurt more than my heart right now.

She couldn't be gone. Not our Rissa.

How would we live without her?

I closed my eyes against the pain swirling around me, engulfing me like the fire that had taken Rissa from us, my heart cracking into tiny little pieces.