Chapter 13

Josie took a deep breath before stepping through the doors of the Homestead Grill. Her heart was fluttering like a flock of birds, but she couldn't keep a smile off her face.

Wesley was waiting for her just inside the restaurant. His face lit up into a wide grin the moment he saw her.

"Hey, Josie!" His eyes were warm as she approached him. "How are you?"

"I'm good." Her voice sounded breathless. All of a sudden, she felt a little wobbly on her heels, something that hadn't happened to her—an experienced wearer of heels—in years. "How are you?"

"Great. I'm looking forward to eating with you."

If he's nervous, she thought, he doesn't show it. He seems totally calm. She offered him a smile and the two of them followed the teenage hostess to a table by a window.

Josie felt nervous. She took off her jacket, laying it over the back of her chair. Underneath it she was wearing an outfit that she and Alissa had carefully picked out together. Josie had called her earlier that day, feeling jittery and begging for advice on what she should wear. Together they had picked out the light blue blazer that they'd already talked about, a white cashmere sweater to go underneath it, black jeans, glossy black heels, and silver bangle bracelets. She felt beautiful and hoped that Wesley thought so as well. She caught him glancing at her admiringly a couple of times, which lifted her spirits.

"I've never eaten here," Josie confessed as she began to peruse the menu. "It looks delicious, though. Personal pizza—Swiss cheese and mushroom burger—chicken and avocado tacos…"

"The food here is amazing." Wesley smiled. "I'm going to order the grilled salmon with garlic and herbs myself. It's my favorite thing here."

In the end, Josie decided on the Swedish meatballs with a side of creamy mashed potatoes and carrots cooked in ginger and turmeric. She and Wesley chatted as they waited for the food, and once it arrived, it smelled glorious.

He watched her as she took her first bite, grinning expectantly.

"Well? Isn't it amazing?"

Josie pretended to swoon over the food. "This sauce," she gasped once she had swallowed. The sauce for the meatballs was rich and savory, and the meat seemed to melt in her mouth.

After they'd spent a few minutes eating quietly and enjoying their food—glancing up now and then to share a smile over it—Wesley leaned back, looking at her.

Oh, he's going to ask me a question, isn't he? she thought, feeling nervous. I guess I can't escape that. It is a date, after all. That's what people do on dates, right?

"So, tell me more about yourself," Wesley said with a friendly smile.

"Like what?" she asked, feeling awkward.

He chuckled. "Anything. I want to know more about you, so I'm interested in any little tidbits you'd care to share." He cocked his head to one side, as if he were thinking up a topic for them to discuss. "How about school? Where did you go to college? Did you like it? What did you study?"

She swallowed. She usually didn't like answering questions, and she felt a little on her guard.

"Uh, it was fine. I liked studying." I sound like Paige, she scolded herself. I'm being unnecessarily terse. "How about you?"

"Oh, I loved college." His grin was warm, and he stared into space for a moment, seeming to be lost in thought. "I also liked studying, and I met so many wonderful people there. I had a lot of professors that really mentored me. What about you? Did you have any mentors in college?"

"Not really." She felt defensive for a second, knowing that she had kept herself closed off from people too much during college as well. But Wesley was smiling at her with such a sweet expression that her defensiveness melted away in the next second. "Well, I guess there was a professor I really looked up to. She was so smart, and she really pushed us, but she was kind."

He nodded, looking enthusiastic. "Role models are so important. That's why I'm so glad Paige is here. Not only does she have you as a great role model, but there are so many other great people in Blueberry Bay for her to look up to."

Josie felt herself flushing under his praise. She didn't know what to say. He seemed to sense how tongue-tied she was feeling and asked the next question.

"What brought you to Blueberry Bay?"

She froze. The answer to that question was long, and very personal. Her first instinct was to say, "Oh, I just ended up here," and leave it at that. But she squashed that impulse, telling herself that she needed to be willing to share her personal life with people. Especially someone like Wesley, who genuinely wanted to get to know her, and who knew a great deal of her history already.

"Well, I think in order to answer that question," she said slowly, "I have to tell you about what my life was like growing up."

He nodded. "I would love to hear that, if you're willing to share it with me."

She smiled at him, appreciating how sweet he was being. She took a deep breath, looking down at the table as she mentally revisited her troubling past.

"When I was growing up, my father was absent, and my mother had problems with drinking. She still does—you know that. As soon as I was old enough to move out, I did. Going to college out of state was like my ticket to freedom. And then I ended up at law school in California."

"Law school?" He sounded both impressed and surprised. "Why didn't you continue?"

She sighed, again feeling the sadness that had overwhelmed her then. "It was… there was so much injustice. It was hard for me to deal with. I wanted to stand up for people, which is why I wanted to become a lawyer in the first place, but dwelling on so many tough situations was hurting my mental health. I had too much empathy, I guess. Seeing other people's hardships impacted my own emotions too much. And… well, I think it made me feel too guilty about the fact that my own sister was still living in a kind of hardship. I felt like I'd abandoned Paige."

Wesley was gazing at her with a sympathetic look. "Don't carry that burden." He offered her a gentle, reassuring smile. "I understand how you felt. That would be hard on someone who came from your circumstances. And you didn't abandon Paige. You were a young woman who was dealing with her own pain. Your father was absent, and your mother was unstable. You were doing the best you could."

She pressed her lips together, moved by his kindness. She nodded, blinking back some tears. His words had really comforted her. "I wanted to break out of that dysfunctional cycle and make my own way."

"And then you found Blueberry Bay." He smiled.

She laughed. "Yes! When I'd realized that I didn't want to be a lawyer anymore, I looked for somewhere to move and I decided on Blueberry Bay. No one knew me here, and I wanted to create a quiet, peaceful life for myself." She stared into space, remembering when she had first moved there. It had been a wonderful time, but in some ways it had been hard. "I'd tried to reach out to Paige, but my calls kept getting ignored. I'd wanted to support her from a distance, but then I'd given up. And I feel now like I didn't do enough. I wish I'd gotten her out sooner—but I knew she didn't want that, and I was trying to respect her wishes while also making sure she was safe." Josie took a deep breath, feeling her chest constrict with the memory.

"That sounds very hard," Wesley said sympathetically.

She nodded and mustered a smile. "It was. I hated feeling both guilty and uncertain like that. But now Paige is here, and at least I know that she's being well-cared for."

"She's lucky to have a sister like you."

"Thank you." She took in the way he was gazing at her with such a kind expression. It made her heart beat faster. She felt like she could tell him anything, "But now I feel like we may never have the relationship that we could have. When she got here, it felt almost like we were strangers."

He nodded and reached across the table to pat her hand for a moment. "You still have a chance at that relationship. Just take things slowly and see this opportunity for the second chance that it is. You and Paige can start a new relationship right now."

She smiled, feeling warmed by his words. "I hope so. But things aren't going how I'd hoped they would. She still seems to be keeping me at a distance."

"Well, you could try opening up to her more, just like you're opening up to me right now. If you take the lead on that, she may follow suit. I mean, sharing personal things with people has been hard for you, and it's probably even harder for Paige."

She nodded. "You're probably right. That makes a lot of sense." She smiled warmly at him, feeling grateful. "Thank you, Wesley. For listening and for giving me good advice."

He returned her smile. "Of course. I'm happy to."

"I have to admit, I was a little worried my history would scare you off." She laughed breathlessly, but he must've sensed the truth in her words because he shook his head emphatically.

"Not at all." He gazed at her with something soft in his eyes, and she felt as though he was really seeing her. Her heart lifted and a glowing kind of feeling filled her chest.

"We should get back to this food." She grinned. She'd almost forgotten about the delicious meal in front of her. She tasted a spoonful of the creamy mashed potatoes and closed her eyes for a moment, savoring the rich taste.

"You're right!" He lifted some seasoned asparagus to his mouth, grinning at her.

They dug back into the food, talking less and eating more for a while. Their conversation turned toward lighter things, and Josie found herself laughing often.

I'm getting more relaxed around him,she realized happily.

They shared bites of each other's food, and she felt a pleasant sense of camaraderie with him. She was aware of just how very attracted to him she was, and the feeling was both incredible and terrifying.

It's like flying, she thought, or skydiving off a cliff. She was giggling, pressing her hand to her mouth over something silly that Wesley had said. I just need to take this feeling one day at a time and enjoy the ride.