CHAPTER 34

I drag him out of the room because . . . this is Nicholas's gallery, and I can't—

Levi comes around me, kissing me while we walk. I kiss him back, walking him backward while he fights with the buttons of my shirt.

It's choppy, our movements. Awkward and amateur, like a pair of teenagers who haven't yet learned the art of finesse.

But once inside my bedroom, it's fucking fire all over again.

I haul him over to the bed, forcing him onto his stomach when he fights to face me. I cover his body with mine, spiking my fingers into his hair, holding him down. He turns his head to the side, angling to beg for a kiss. I kiss him, pulling his lower lip between my teeth. He moans, opening his mouth wide for my tongue.

Exhilaration courses through my body, and from deep within this hurricane between us, I tell myself that it doesn't have to be the way it was with Nicholas. Levi is a different person. Maybe Levi won't hate himself later. Maybe he won't blame me for taking advantage of him.

I suck into the shell of Levi's ear, trapping his wrists behind his back with my knee. He groans, loud and lustful.

Why shoudn't I fuck him like this? He's different. I know he is. He's. Not. Fucking. Nicholas.

Levi crooks his left knee and arches his hips, giving me his ass. I bite down on his ear, his shoulder, the back of his neck. He digs his forehead into the pillow, arching his back for more. I leave trails of purple marks from the flesh below his ear to the small of his back, letting his wrists go so I can palm his ass. My heart rattles inside my chest. What a sweet, beautiful ass.

He lets out a string of vulgar commands and begging pleas:

"Fuck me, Hayden. Yesss, just the way I want it. Just the fucking way I want it."

Grabbing his hips, I pull his ass further up, biting my way down and across his ass cheeks, enjoying the way his skin blooms with color once I've let the flesh go. Then, I bury my face right into his ass. My tongue teases his asshole but not enough to give him the satisfaction he craves, dragging a long fuuuckk out of him.

When my tongue swipes across his hole again, he whimpers. Still vulgar but begging now. "P-p-please Hayden, g-give me your fucking mouth. Let me feel that fucking t-tongue."

I do, and he pushes back, flexing his asshole, trying to get my tongue deeper into him. So receptive. So out of control. Saliva gathers at the back of my mouth, anticipating how well he'll take me when we fuck. How many times he'll force us to fuck before he's too exhausted to move, and yet, still, he'll beg for more sex.

"Don't stop, Hayden. Please. I'm begging you. Please don't stop. Please. Please. Please. Please."

I don't stop. I can't. Because I want this too, even if he might accuse me of using him later.

I'm now an active participant in Levi's mania. Fully self-aware and choosing destruction anyway.

I leave the evidence of our lost control – dark marks – all over his ass, down the back of his thighs, and even his calves.

Flipping him over, I yank his legs apart, baring his body to my ravenous eyes and hands. Levi's cock slaps against his stomach. I drop my head and swallow him, my patience in tatters somewhere in a place not found. I can't get enough of him into my mouth. I need to absorb him into me.

Like him when he's manic, I truly believe I'm God right now with the ability to taste various parts of him all at once. With his cock inside my throat, my tongue reaches for his balls. When I can't reach his balls while his cock is stuffed into my mouth, I growl with fury to have to leave his dick and bend my head to swallow his balls. All the while he writhes beneath me, moaning and chanting my name, rubbing his body against the sheets. When I look up from between his legs, his eyes are closed, one hand clutching the pillows above him and the other pulling at my hair.

I bite across his inner thighs, and he begs me to mark him more. "Everywhere, Hayden. Everywhere. Please."

He reaches for me, but I shove his hands away. I can't give him any control. Levi, if in control while manic, would annihilate us both, I'm sure of it.

Climbing up his body, I straddle his chest. Then, with my hands curled tightly around his throat, I shove my cock into his mouth. He chokes immediately.

Oh, but Levi isn't a fucking quitter. He opens his mouth wider and takes me all the way in. I withdraw, loving his protests, then I slam back into his mouth. He chokes again, and I don't care. I fuck his mouth, brutalizing his throat, and he digs his fingers into my thighs, trying to pull me even closer.

Levi's face is buried inside my groin, and his muffled moans are sounds of art itself.

Yanking my cock away from his mouth, I reach for the lube and condoms from the nightstand. Then, bending him in half, I drape his thighs over my shoulder.

"Hayden," Levi moans. His voice is soft. Like he's finally found me after a long search. Again, "Hayden."

A sigh escapes my lips, finding its way through the lust-filled fog currently serving as a drug around us. Even now, the softness between us is inescapable. I press a chaste kiss to his ankle. Then, bringing his foot to my mouth, I drag my tongue over his instep, sucking the soft flesh there.

Leaving his legs hanging over my shoulder for a moment, I roll on a condom and ease into him. He stares up at me. Excitement burns in those soft browns but also the other things skating the edge: his exhaustion. His depression, temporarily covered by his euphoria. Maybe his soon-to-arrive shame for the way he begged for sex.

Even with Nicholas, my need to cover that shame and make it disappear was not as overwhelming as it is now with Levi. So, what other choice do I have but to lower my face to his, while I press further and further into him, and kiss him tenderly?

Moving gently, I renounce my need to fuck him hard for just a moment, and I move in and out of him gently. Above all else, I wish rest for you, Levi. I wish for you a mind that lets you fucking rest. Please don't hate us after this.

He claws at my back, so I set aside all gentleness. Pushing out every shred of logic from my mind, I withdraw from Levi's body. Then, I surge forward. He screams with the impact. My fingers reach for his throat, and I choke him while I fuck him. I fuck him like he's a fucking ragdoll.

"Is this what you wanted?" I demand, my voice a ragged gasp. "You want me to tear you open, Levi? You need me to loosen this hole?"

"Yes. Fuck, yes. Harder, Hayden. Fucking split me open."

I lower my face to his. His bottom lip is split and bleeding. I swipe my tongue across his mouth, licking blood into my mouth, and then, I latch onto that lip and suck. Levi moans loudly around our kiss, rocking his ass against my groin, and, with his hands buried into the back of my hair, he pulls me deeper into our kiss.

When I pull back his lip is red and swollen. I give his abused mouth a break, and then, while my cock wrecks his ass, I sink my teeth into his cheek, biting. Exhilaration tears through my body. I love him like this. God, help me, I love him like this.

"Fuck." Levi's voice is strained near my ear. "Again, Hayden. Fucking eat me, Hayden."

I bite down along his jawline, sucking his skin into my mouth, and dying for the feel of his light scruff against my tongue.

"Fucking more, Hayden," he begs.

I give him more. Biting and sucking every part of his body I can reach. "I want to watch you blow, sweetheart," I whisper into his ear. Easing back, my fingers circle his ankles, keeping his legs up while I fuck him relentlessly. Almost every inch of his body is bruised, deep purples and reds mixing with his tattoos. He's beautiful.

Levi pumps his cock, and then, with a roar, he comes.

I follow, thrusting into him, my hips moving at a brutal pace knowing he'll hurt tomorrow. I want him to have that reminder, even if his mind doesn't remember. If he wakes up with gaps in his memory, at least his body will remember, and he'll know that we were like this.

He'll know that I took from him as much as he took from me. And he might hate me.

But this is Levi.

And maybe he won't.