Chapter 7

It was the day before the wedding, and Arabella was starting to get beyond annoyed. All morning, she and Sarah ran several errands around the estate, trying to get everything in order for the wedding tomorrow. At some point, Madeline had asked, "Why are you in a rush, Sister? Surely you would want more time to plan out every small detail?"

Arabella had a hard time wondering how to tell her sister that that wasn't possible, so instead, she answered, "We are just so in love and cannot wait."

Madeline had always been perceptive. Ever since she was a little girl, she had been able to notice things that others would not. Arabella usually admired that about her younger sister, but right now she just found it annoying. She needed every one in her life to believe this lie.

"How come he is not putting the slightest effort into the wedding preparations?" she had asked.

"Madeline, you are meddling in something that is not your business. When it's your turn to get married, you will understand that a woman's taste is what makes weddings so memorable," Sarah had cut in.

"Oh Lord, do not remind me of that," Madeline huffed, never one for looking forward to matrimony.

By noon, Arabella had started to get really annoyed. She understood that Edward may have been hesitant about preparing for a wedding that he did not want to partake in, but she felt the same. She was annoyed that all of this responsibility was thrust on her and her sister and that he wasn't helping in the slightest.

He is not making this easy for me.

She decided that after luncheon, she would talk to him about this. When lunch came and went, she was annoyed to find that Edward did not join them. She was to be wedded to him in less than twenty-four hours, and she had not seen him since last night, when they had that lovely conversation.

"Why are you ignoring me?" she mumbled to herself when she was taking her daily promenade in the hedge garden.

She appreciated Herbert at times like this because he kept his distance, but he was there to make sure she did not do anything rash. Not that she was one to do anything rash on a regular occurrence, but she never knew if today might be that day.

After her promenade, she felt somewhat better, but the looming stress of being tied to someone who did not love her and she did not love back for the rest of her life was impossible to let go.

When dinner time came, all of the wedding preparations had been hastily wrapped up. Not everything would be perfect, but it would be good enough.

The family was excited and talking about their expectations for the ceremony.

"Madeline," Leonard chastised, "you know very well it is not proper to speak with your mouth full."

Madeline just rolled her eyes and nudged her brother with her elbow.

Leonard sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Please do not behave like this tomorrow," he said. "Speaking of tomorrow, Your Grace. Have any of your family members responded to our invitation? Do you know if we will need to prepare additional rooms?"

Edward hung his head slightly. "Unfortunately, I do not believe any of them will be able to make it."

The air, again, was riddled with unease. Arabella had the sneaking suspicion that the invitations were never sent out. That would be something that she would ask him about the next time they were alone.

"That is a shame. No matter, I'm sure Arabella would love to introduce you to our family," Leonard said, with a soft smile directed at his sister.

"Everyone except Marley," Madeline piped up with a false sneer.

At the mention of Marley, Arabella and the rest of her siblings groaned.

Edward let out one of the most boisterous laughs she had ever heard from him and asked, "Who is this Marley, and what is wrong with them?"

"She is our dearest cousin. But like Madeline, she has a knack for getting into trouble," Arabella explained.

"Yes, but unlike me, she's not the best at getting away with it." Madeline giggled, before lifting another spoonful of pea soup to her mouth.

The air felt a lot lighter now, and when dinner was finally over, everybody felt satiated and ready for bed. The house servants cleaned the dinner table, and Leonard, Sarah, and Richard excused themselves to retire to their chambers for the evening.

"Your Grace, would you mind promenading with me in the hedge garden? I have some things I would like to discuss with you," Arabella asked.

Edward nodded. He wiped his mouth with his napkin one last time before throwing the cloth on his dirty plate.

The two walked in relative silence on the way out and at the entrance of the garden. Herbert was in his usual spot, about ten meters away from the two, and stayed quiet.

When they were partially hidden by one of the hedges, Edward turned to her.

"What did you want to discuss?" he asked, his gaze soft and his words even softer. It made what Arabella was about to confront him with even harder to be mad at.

"Why have you not helped with any of the wedding preparation?" she asked, averting her gaze. Her voice was even, but she could feel the unwavering anger quickly threatening to take over.

"Oh," he grumbled, his hand reaching up and scratching at the back of his neck. "Yes, about that?—"

"Because I understand that this is not a predicament either one of us wanted to be in, but I don't think I should be the one to oversee all of the preparations," she interrupted, her anger starting to fizzle out. "Because if this is a sneak peek into what our married life will be like, I think I would rather risk the ton's judgment than go through with this."

She looked up at him when she said that and was met with his hardened gaze and brooding stature. His eyebrows knitted in what looked like anger, and his lips were pressed into a fine line.

He licked his lips. "I did not expect you to be the only one who oversaw the preparations."

"Well, you may not have expected it, but that is what happened," she said, standing her ground. "Just because you say that does not erase the fact that that is how it played out."

"I figured my efforts would be best put into how our home and our estate would be ran once we are married, but I am sorry I did not help pick out which desserts would be served at our wedding breakfast," he snarled.

Ara felt her cheeks burning up at this point. She was livid. They weren't even married yet, and they were already having their first fight.

"If that is what you reduce my input to, then do not ever ask for my help," she replied through gritted teeth.

"That is not what I was saying, Ara." He sighed, putting his hand on his hip.

"That is what it sounded like," she huffed, not even noticing that he used her nickname. "Can I ask, though. Are you mad at me?"

This question seemed to surprise Edward. He gave her an incredulous look and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Why do you think I'm mad at you?"

"Well, it is partially because you did not help with the preparations," she started, squinting up at him. "But it is also because you have appeared to have been ignoring me these last couple of days. I can understand why you may be upset, but I would have loved more than just a fleeting conversation with you."

Edward bit his bottom lip fiercely and nearly belted out, "I am not mad at you, Arabella."

"Then why have you been ignoring me?"

"Because I am trapping you in something you will never be able to leave. You will never fall in love with me, and you will never have the love marriage you deserve."

"Who said I could never fall in love with you?!" she fired back, her voice rising nearly an entire octave.

She was stepping closer to him with every question she asked, and now she was only a few inches away, staring up into his dark eyes.

"Because I am unlovable, Ara," he croaked, his eyes flicking to the ground. "I always have been. I cut myself off. I do not allow myself to develop feelings for anybody, and in return I hope that they do not either."

"Is that why you're mad at me? Because I'm trapping you in the same thing?" she asked, her eyes glossy.

Little do you know I cannot stop thinking about you!

"I am not mad at you!"

"And you are not unlovable!"

Their faces were now dangerously close. Arabella could feel every quick breath he took and the heat emanating from his strong body. She almost could not stand being this close to him and not being able to do anything with her raging emotions.

She wanted to put her hands on him—not in a violent way, but in a way that showed him the fire he had stoked inside her. She just didn't know how to even go about showing him, or if it was proper for the woman to make the first move.

"You make me feel the most annoying emotions that it drives me insane whenever I see you," he admitted.

"How do I make you feel, Edward?"

He looked her in the eye, his pupils dilated. "Like I am on fire. Overwhelming in the best way possible."

Even in the darkness, she knew that he could see her pinkening face. She felt the courage to stand on her tiptoes.

"Show me," she whispered.

Arabella could hear her heart pounding in her ears. This was it. She was about to kiss the man that she would lie with for the rest of her life. She had no idea what to do, but at the same time she did. When Edward's hands gently cupped her face and tilted her chin up, she wrapped her fingers around the crooks of his elbows.

His breath was hot on her face, and she was sure that her breath was just as warm on his face. The seconds before they touched felt like hours, and when their lips finally met, it took everything in her not to freak out.

Kissing was a new sensation for her because she had never felt lips on her own before. His lips felt warm and soft. And they moved against her own at an agonizingly slow pace. She did not quite know what to do with her lips, so she let him lead.

He managed to part her lips a bit wider, and when his tongue met hers, she felt a fierce shiver run up her spine.

She let all her inhibitions go when he started kissing her harder. She felt a near uncomfortable ball of warmth sizzle in the pit of her stomach. Was this what Sarah had referred to?

The burning sensation traveled lower and surprised Arabella when she could feel it deep within her core.

This feels beyond incredible.

When they finally broke the kiss, they stared at each other while Edward rubbed small circles with his thumb right under her eye.

"Now you know."

When Arabella returned to her chambers that night, her mind could not stop replaying their kiss. It was almost impossible for her to fall asleep.

I cannot wait to do that again.