5. Aurelia

FIVE

Everyone was staring at me.Shit. My knuckles were white, the tray clutched in my hands.

Word couldn't have traveled that fast, right? I sucked in a breath, heading to an empty table in the middle of the mess hall. So much for a good first day on board. I could still turn this around, though, couldn't I? I'd get him to give me a chance. To realize I was more than just some kid who knew nothing.

Sighing, I took a bite of the pasta dish they'd prepared. At least the food was good, since it was all we'd be eating for the next few years. Compliments to the chef, because I'd definitely be going back for seconds. I'd never shied away from eating, even if it added a few extra pounds to my hips and thighs. The cheesy pasta was worth it.

Maybe I'd run a few extra laps around the track that I'd seen earlier, around the fifth level—it went in an entire loop, the recreation center in the middle of it. A good run would help me clear my head, and I'd rather that if people were going to stare at me all night.

"Hey, Aurelia." A soft voice brought me to attention, and I looked up to find Astrid—the Chief Medical Officer—standing in front of me, having changed out of her uniform and into a plain jumpsuit, only her badge showing her rank and the white stripes on her arm showing her position.

A familiar, friendly face. Maybe this wouldn't be the end of the world. "Astrid. Hi." I grinned at her.

She set her tray down, sliding in across from me. "Hey. You all alone?"

I looked around at the empty table and dropped my voice to a whisper. "Yup. Feels like I have a big scarlet letter painted on my back."

"Earlier was…" She made a face. "I'm sorry."

"Yeah." I winced. "I didn't know what to expect from my first day, but not that. God, day one and he already hates me."

Astrid gave me a small frown. "I'm sure he doesn't hate you. He just seemed… surprised, that's all."

"Oh, good," a third voice said, popping up next to our table. It was the girl with the dark hair in double buns, also an officer—Violet. "I was worrying I wouldn't find anyone I knew in here." She sat next to Astrid and then gave me a sympathetic smile.

I waved her off. "If you're going to tell me it wasn't that bad, don't bother."

She laughed, her brown eyes full of warmth. "No, but at least you have a sense of humor about it." Violet reached across the table, laying a hand on my arm. "My first day was rough, too. Don't worry—it'll get better."

Fixing a smile on my face, I stabbed another noodle onto my fork.

"There you three are," the ginger girl said as she sat down with us. Finley. She'd pulled her hair back out of her face with two green hair clips, which made her eyes stand out. "Weird vibes in here."

I sighed. "I think word got out about what happened on the bridge. Everyone's been staring at me since I came in." The crew members who had been in the bridge must have gossiped. God, this was mortifying. What were we, high schoolers? "Definitely don't feel like I'm getting started on the right foot on the ship."

"So let's start over." Astrid's face broke out into a smile as she twirled one strand of electric blue around her finger. Then she stuck her hand out to me. "Hi, I'm Astrid. I'm twenty-seven and I'm one of the youngest Chief Medical Officers in the federation." She shrugged her shoulders. "When I first got my position, everyone doubted me because I was young, and I look like this." Astrid gestured to her hair. "As if the color of my hair affects my work."

"Really?" I frowned. "What changed?"

"Me." She laughed. "But I guess… I proved them wrong. And I reminded myself why I was here. Not for them. For me."

Finley nodded in agreement. "I'm twenty-six now, but I'll never forget my first assignment when I was mistaken as an intern and asked to go fetch coffees for the researchers. I don't put up with that shit on my crew." She opened her mouth like she was going to say something else, but then closed it.

"Sometimes people still ask me to get coffee. As if I'm some sort of over-glorified secretary as the Comms officer," Violet chimed in, rolling her eyes. "I joined the federation directly out of college. With a communications degree and a computer science background, it just made sense. But there's a lot more to all our jobs."

"You're right. I didn't come here just to turn around with my tail tucked between my legs." Biting my lower lip and worrying it into my mouth, I tried to think about what advice my dad would have given me if he were here. "But what can I do?"

As I stared at Astrid, the answer was obvious. Start over. But would it work if I marched myself back to Captain Kellar, explained that I wasn't going anywhere, and that I had a right to be here? To tell him I'd earn my spot here, just like the rest of them.

I just needed time to prove myself.

The conversations in the cafeteria came to a halt, and a few seconds later, I realized why.

A tall, brooding presence stood in the entryway.

He was here.

I leaped to my feet, not fully thinking through what I was going to say. I'd figure that out once I got started. After people got to know me, they always liked me.

How different could it be with this man?

"Captain—" I started, but he brushed past me like I had said nothing, taking his food to the other end of the room. God, this guy really was an infuriating grump, wasn't he?

I sat back down, feeling defeated.

"What…" I frowned at the other girls as he took his own seat, as far away from us as possible. "Did he just ignore me?"

"I'm sure he didn't mean…" Violet frowned, looking between his table, now surrounded by men—and his sister, Kayle.

"Guess the rumors were true." I sighed, stabbing at my food with my fork before muttering under my breath. "Gorgeous and an asshole." What a combination.

Finley snickered under her breath.

Astrid grimaced, giving me an apologetic look. "That was cold. Even for him."

"Have you worked with him before?"

She shook her head. "Not directly. But I'd met him before, and I never got warm fuzzy vibes. He respects hard work, though. Once you prove yourself, I know he'll come around."

If I got the chance.

That was the only thing I could think of through the rest of dinner, even as the conversation around the table lapsed, everyone eating their food. After we'd all finished eating, everyone shared stories of back home, of their childhoods and what it was like when they'd first joined the UGSF.

Maybe no one had as rough of a first day as mine, but I enjoyed hearing some misfortunes they'd gotten into over the years.

Finally, with a yawn, it was time to head to bed, since we would all be up and ready in the early morning. I said goodnight to the rest of the girls and retreated to my quarters.

Though my sleephad been lacking, I was ready, dressed in my flight suit and ready to go before 0800 the next morning. I'd pulled my hair back in two tight braids, and my shiny new badge rested over my heart. Ready.

I placed my ID card on the sensor to open the door to the bridge and waited.

Beep. A red light flashed.

Frowning, I removed my card and tried again.

Beep. Another red light. I blinked.

Did I… not have access? I tried a third time before confirming my hunch.

I didn't have access to the bridge. Was it an error, or had that asshole really locked me out? How was I supposed to do my job, the whole reason I was on this ship, if I couldn't even access the bridge?

Biting back my frustration, I hit the button on the intercom and waited.

Violet's voice came through on the other side. "Lieutenant Callisto, how can I help you?"

I cleared my throat. "My access has been removed from the bridge."

There was a pause, and then she came back. "That is correct."

"Why?" A sinking feeling settled in my gut. "I can't do my job if I can't access the bridge."

"You've been, um… dismissed." There was a wince in her voice.

"What?"

His words from yesterday came back to haunt me. You're dismissed. Shit, apparently he really meant them.

"Then who is going to be piloting the ship?"

It wasn't Violet who responded this time. "Assistant Pilot Holmes has taken over your responsibilities." That statement, spoken in his deep timbre, would haunt me until the end of days. He wasn't even going to give me a chance.

"But—"

"You're excused, Miss Callisto."

No way. This wasn't happening. My cheeks heated, embarrassment flaring through me.

What was I supposed to do? Get off the ship before it departed? It was already too late for that. Hope that the UGSF would understand and give me a new command? Because they wouldn't.

I'd be the laughingstock of my entire graduating class.

I'd never be able to show my face in the federation again after getting dismissed from my first job. No way.

At least I hadn't cried. That was the only thing that kept my head held high as I walked away. No tears, Aurelia. Not today.

After runningoff my excess anger on the treadmill in the gym, I'd only reached a simmer instead of a scalding boil. Still, this would not work for me. There was no way I could sit here and let someone else do my job while I sat around.

Showering, I let that rage fill my body, not bothering to pull my hair back as I dressed in my jumpsuit and affixed my officer's pin to it. After deciding I looked the part, I headed towards his office.

I could only hope to find him in there instead of the bridge, since I'd been hastily locked out of there.

Smashing my hand against the sensor to open the door, I marched inside the room, and the captain's head shot up from where he sat behind the desk.

"Sir." I didn't give him a chance to tell me to leave.

"What are you doing here?" He grunted. Actually grunted.

"Why won't you let me do my job?" I asked, instead of answering his question.

Captain Kellar looked relaxed, like the picture of carefree arrogance as he leaned back in his chair. "You're not qualified to do it."

"I'm not?" I repeated, though it wasn't a question. Because I knew I was. There wasn't a doubt in my mind about that. "My degree from the Flight Academy says otherwise. That I was number one in my class and logged more hours of simulator time than anyone else does, too. Sure, I didn't get any actual time in space, but newsflash, asshole—no one does. Not until they get their first position."

His brows furrowed.

Shit, had I just called him an asshole? This so wasn't going well.

"You can't fire me. Not until you give me a chance."