Chapter 9

CHAPTER9

Icovered my head with my blanket as the loud banging continued. I wasn’t ready to wake up or face whoever was waiting for me on the other side of that door.

I groaned and pressed my pillow to my face as I tried to block them out. My pillow that smelled exactly like Evren.

Evren, whose room I was currently invading.

“Shit.” I threw the pillow to the end of the bed as I shot up and looked around me. The sun was shining in through the window, and it gave me no chance to pretend that I hadn’t spent the entire night in Evren’s bed.

“Wake up, Adara!” Thalia’s voice rang through the hall, and I cursed again as I jumped from the bed.

My muscles were still stiff and achy, but I didn’t have time to deal with that right now. Instead, I ran to the door and pulled it open before Thalia alerted the whole damn castle that I was missing.

“I’m up.”

Thalia swirled in my direction, a new set of clothing resting in her arms, and the annoyed look on her face fell as soon as she spotted me in Evren’s doorway.

“What are you doing?”

“Sleeping.” I crossed my arms and prayed that she didn’t make a big deal of this.

“Okay.” She nodded and moved across the hall to hand me the clothes. Her gaze danced with humor and a grin graced her lips. “Get dressed, then let’s get some breakfast. We have training to do.”

“Right.” I pulled the clothes to my chest as I shut the door and took a deep breath. I hurried to Evren’s bathroom and got myself ready for the day.

My hands trembled as I shoved my legs into the trousers. I was excited for our training today, excited to feel more in control of my power. But I was also flustered by the fact that she had just found me in Evren’s room, that I had felt the need to be here in the first place.

Thalia had brought an outfit that looked almost identical to the one from the day before. I looked at myself in his mirror as I tucked my shirt into my trousers, and I didn’t have a clue what I was doing.

I still smelled like him, my hair, my skin. The memory of him was floating along every inch of me, and I hated to admit how much comfort it brought me.

I had no plan for what I wanted, for what I would do, but it would be foolish of me to not soak in every bit of training Thalia was willing to give me. Her help was far too valuable. I pulled my hair back away from my face and tucked my dagger back into my boot.

I was just about to leave the room when I passed by his small desk and spotted something shining in the sunlight. I stopped, my hand aching to reach forward and find out what it was.

I pushed the few sheets of parchment to the side and stared down at the delicate gold chain. I lifted it in my fingers, careful not to harm it, and stared at the small crescent moon that dangled from the chain.

There was a small tag attached to it, and my name was written across it in crisp, masculine letters. There was nothing more. No indication of where it came from.

It could have been Evren’s or someone else’s, but I had never seen him wear it. But the metal had a familiarity to it I couldn’t explain. I could feel it as the gold pressed against my fingers.

The necklace called to me, and I gripped it in my fingers as I thought about putting it back where I found it. But that churning in my gut wouldn’t stop.

Before I could think better of it, I pulled off the tag and slipped the gold chain over my head and tucked the crescent moon between my breasts. The metal hummed against my skin, but I tried to ignore it as I made my way out of Evren’s room and closed the door behind me.

“Took you long enough.” Thalia pushed off the wall where she was leaning next to my door. “I thought I going to have to come in and rescue you, but I didn’t know exactly what was going on in there.” She grinned, and I let her quip roll off my back.

I started walking down the hallway toward the courtyard where we had trained the day before, and she jogged to catch up with me.

“What’d you think about the book?”

Shit.I completely forgot about the book. I was pretty sure it was still sitting somewhere in the mess of Evren’s bedding.

“I didn’t get to it.” I ran my hand down my face and over my neck. The gold still buzzed against my skin, and I let my fingers trail down the length of it. “I fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.”

“You must’ve been really comfortable.” Thalia bumped her shoulder against mine, and I could feel a blush of embarrassment creeping up my chest.

“Are you going to tell anybody about this?” I didn’t know why, but the thought of Sorin or anyone else finding out about the poor little Starblessed sneaking into their prince’s room in the middle of the night while he was gone didn’t sit well with me.

It made me feel weaker than I already was.

“Your secrets are yours and yours alone.” She looked at me sincerely, and I trusted her word. “But you might want to think about the staff. Mina was already in a tizzy over the fact that you didn’t open your door for dinner last night.”

“Shit. I didn’t think about that.”

“It’s not a big deal.” Thalia turned until she was facing me and walked backward toward the courtyard. “Mina’s nosy, but she won’t tell anyone. Just tell her you’ll be sleeping in Evren’s room if that’s what you want.”

My chest ached as I thought about what she just said, and I open my mouth to ask her a question before I could think better of it. “And what do you think about me sleeping in his room last night? That it was foolish of me?”

“I think that you’re confused.” She looked at me with sympathy, and I hated it. “And that your mate brought you here to a kingdom you don’t know and then put himself at risk once again. It’s okay for you to be angry with him, to hate him even if that’s what you feel, but it’s also okay for you to worry about him. To miss him. Crave him.”

My steps faltered as I looked up at her. “I don’t crave him.”

“Like I said, your secrets are yours alone.” She winked at me, and I knew that she could most definitely see my blush now.

We pushed outside into the courtyard, and before she could ask, I set my dagger down along the edge. “What are we working on today?”

“More of the same.” She bounced on her toes. “We need to focus on building your balance and your strength if you’re to get anywhere else, then we’ll work on your magic.”

I was caught off guard by her words. I hadn’t thought we would get to it so quickly. “My magic?”

“Yeah.” She motioned toward my hands that were still stained black from where I had used my magic before. They resembled Evren’s hands after he used his power, but I had seen no one else with the same markings, not in this kingdom or beyond it. It was only him and I. “Your magic is different than mine. I’m not quite sure how different, but it appears to resemble Evren’s much closer than it does my own.”

“Do all Starblessed have magic?”

“No.” She shook her head. “And most don’t realize the magic that’s inside them until they are fed from. I didn’t have a clue until Gavril took and took and took from me.” Her gaze darkened as she spoke. “I could feel it stirring inside me then, but I didn’t know how to control it. It wasn’t until I came here, until Evren helped me train, that I realized just how much power I held.”

My chest ached for this woman in front of me. For everything that she had endured and survived. When I first laid eyes on her, I had hated her, envied her for the things I thought she had done, but every bit of that had dissolved and had been replaced with something new.

“Okay.” I nodded and widened my stance just like she had shown me the day before. “Tell me what you want me to do.”

By the time we got through the first portion of the training, I was sweating, out of breath, and certain I would wake up with several bruises in the morning. Thalia had taken it easy on me the day before, and even that had been hard. But today? Today she showed me what she was capable of.

I lay against the ground and shielded the sun from my eyes.

“Take some deep breaths and get a drink of your water.” She was barely breathing hard. “This is going to seem like nothing once we begin training with your magic.”

“What?” I looked over at her and groaned as she smirked. She had her elbows resting on her knees and a cup of cold water in her hand, thanks to Mina. Mina who had said nothing to me about the night before, thankfully.

“What we just did is physically taxing.” She motioned to the small ring we had created. “But magic drains you from within. It takes so much concentration and skill, and it will drain you in a way you have never experienced before.”

“Way to sell it, Thalia.” Both of our heads jerked up at the sound of Sorin’s voice. He was sitting on a low stone ledge that wrapped around the courtyard, and neither of us had noticed his presence. “I bet the girl can’t wait to get started now.”

“Don’t you have somewhere better to be, Sorin?” Thalia rolled her eyes at him. “Bashing someone’s head or something?”

I looked back and forth between them, and I was so confused. They both claimed to be Evren’s close friend, yet they looked at one another as if they were more than willing to kill the other.

“And miss this?” Sorin leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. His hair was pulled back at the nape of his neck, and he somehow looked more handsome than the night I met him. “I wouldn’t dare.”

Thalia growled low and only loud enough for me to hear, but Sorin’s handsome face lit up in a smirk that told me he knew exactly what he was doing.

“Are you two friends?” I motion back and forth between them, and Sorin laughed.

“The best of friends.” He grinned “Thalia just doesn’t like to admit it.”

“I never denied we were friends.” Thalia pushed up off the ground and stood. “You can be my friend while I still think you’re nothing but a brute.”

Sorin assessed her, his gaze roaming over every inch of her body before he stood with a large grin on his face. He dusted off his trousers nonchalantly, but I noted the dagger that was strapped to his thigh and two larger ones that were crossed along his back. “I could show you exactly what kind of brute I could be if only you given a chance.”

I blushed and quickly rolled over onto my stomach as I pushed up on trembling, tired arms.

“Be careful of this one, Adara. He’ll try to get in your pants any chance you let him.”

Sorin cocked his head to the side and studied her, but his grin never slipped from his face. “You do realize that’s a you and me thing, right?” He moved his hand back and forth between them. “You’re the only one I’ve been pining after for all these years.”

I stood next to Thalia, and she tried to look so stubborn, but she couldn’t hide the way her lips twitched at the side or how her shoulders relaxed. She may have been annoyed by Sorin, but she was comfortable with him. I wondered if the two of them had done far more than either were willing to admit.

“Do you mind, Sorin? We have training to get back to.”

“Of course.” Sorin bowed playfully with his hand resting over his heart. “I just came to relay some news about our prince.”

Everything stopped in that moment. I could feel my heart hammering away in my chest. He had news of Evren. News that he was waiting until now to deliver?

“What of Evren?” I clenched my hands into fists and tried to stop myself from fidgeting.

Sorin’s gaze swung to meet my own before he answered. “He’s made it back to the fae kingdom. From what Jorah has reported, things are tense, but the queen believes they were attacked near the border.” I heard his words, but they didn’t calm me. The queen was no fool. She had to know the truth.

Evren had told me she would stop at nothing until she got me back, and I feared what that nothing would entail. What would she do to Evren if she found out? If she suspected? Would she kill the son of her husband, of her king, if she believed him a traitor?

I knew the answer deep in my gut, and my magic swirled and writhed inside of me, begging for me to let it out, to go after him, to save my mate. But I pushed it down inch by inch as I tried to control my breathing.

“When is he to return?”

“I don’t know.” Sorin shook his head, and I noted the dark circles under his eyes.

“Any word for us?” Thalia crossed her arms as she studied the captain in front of her.

“Stay down. Stay quiet.” Sorin shrugged his shoulders as if that didn’t drive him mad, but he rubbed his hand over his eyebrows as he delivered Evren’s order. “Evren wants no movement that can tip the queen off on what is happening.”

“What is happening?” I looked back and forth between the two of them. I felt so lost, so far on the outside looking in.

“If the queen finds out, if she knows that Evren not only has you but knows of the prophecy, she shall kill us all.”

“The queen doesn’t know that Evren knows of the prophecy?” As soon as they heard my question, they looked to one another and Thalia wrinkled her brow.

“No.” Sorin shook his head, and I watched as his hand tapped against his dagger mindlessly. “The queen thinks it’s her best-kept secret. If she had any idea that Evren knew, she would destroy him before he was even able to open his mouth to defend himself. The son of her king be damned. The two of you are the key to the prophecy. The queen needs your hand or Evren’s head.”

Terror like I never felt before coursed through me, and my magic raged, begging for me to let it out. Uncontrollable, angry, scared. “Then why would he go back there? Why would he do this?”

“Because he’s trying to save his people. To save you.” Sorin watched me carefully, and I wondered if he could see the magic writhing inside me. “You have no idea what it used to be like. The king may sit on the biggest throne, but it is Queen Kaida who rules. The queen and that fucking son of hers will ruin the whole damn world if we allow them.”

“Can you feel your magic now?”

I turned to face Thalia, and she was staring down at my hands. I followed her gaze and watched as trickles of black smoke left my fingers.

“I can’t control it.” I could hear the irritation, the fear in my own voice.

“It’s harder to control when your emotions are high.” She moved in front of me and laid her hands against mine. “When you’re angry, fearful, or even aroused, your magic will flare inside of you. It is up to you whether you use it or not.”

Sorin moved closer to us, but I didn’t pull my hands away from Thalia.

“I’m going to leave you two to it.” The cockiness was gone from his voice, and my anger only spurred my magic on. If this captain of Evren’s guard was so fearful for his prince, his friend, then why didn’t he stop him? Why didn’t he tell his friend that this was the wrong thing to do?

But I didn’t say any of those questions aloud. I held them in and let them twist inside of me with my magic.

Sorin leaned forward, pressing a gentle kiss to Thalia’s forehead, and her eyes fluttered shut before opening again to stare straight ahead at me. Neither one of us watched as he left the courtyard. He simply disappeared, but I was too busy fighting the swarm happening inside of me to care.

Questioning his loyalty, of what they were allowing their prince to do, wouldn’t help me calm the magic inside me or the fear.

“The first thing you should learn is how to use your emotions to control your power.” Thalia lifted her hand and pressed her palm against mine. I jolted back when I felt her power mix with my own. I looked between us, and the most beautiful shade of blue wrapped around my black magic in a caress.

“Why is your… why is your magic blue?”

Thalia cocked her head as she stared down at her magic, and I knew she was thinking about her words carefully. “Everyone’s magic has an aura, but most people’s magic those stay inside of them. It is rare for someone’s magic to escape them like yours or Evren’s or even mine.” She lifted her fingers and ran them through the smoke between us. “It takes an effort for me to push my magic out of me like this. It’s a strain. But it appears to come from you so naturally.”

“I’ve only used my magic a few times.” I clenched my hands into fists and tried to pull my smoke back into myself, but it didn’t listen. “Each time was when I was fearful or angry. I have no idea what my magic is like otherwise.”

“Evren’s magic is similar.” Thalia took a step back and pulled the blue smoke back into herself before lifting her hand in a gentle motion and knocking me on my ass.

My breath was knocked from my lungs as I hit the ground, and I looked up at her like she had lost her mind. “What was that for?”

“My magic is controlled from here.” She pressed her hand against her stomach. “I reach deep inside myself, and I can pull the magic I want. I control it, master it, but Evren’s is different.”

“What do you mean?”

I dusted off my hands as I sat up and stared at her.

“Evren’s magic is more volatile. It’s strong, stronger than I’ve ever seen before, and sometimes hard to control. He is wary of the magic that lies inside of him, and rightfully so. Your magic feels the same to me. The best thing you can do is learn to control it.”

My magic stopped inside of me as if watching her, assessing the words she was saying, and I hated how right she was. I had never experienced this kind of magic before, but everything about my magic felt uncontrollable.

It was as angry as I was.

“Show me how.”