Chapter 6

CHAPTER6

Iwrapped the thick towel around my body and did my best to wring out my hair. My body was exhausted, my mind as well, and I wanted nothing more than to climb into my bed and sleep away the rest of the afternoon.

I wanted to sleep away the plague of thoughts about what I had just done.

I pulled the washroom door open, steam escaping with me, and I stopped short when Evren lifted his head to look at me.

He was sitting on my bed with his elbows resting on his knees and his head in his hands. He had dark circles under his eyes, his exhaustion making itself known, but I tried to not let my worry for him fester inside of me. I reminded myself of who he was, of what he was, and of the consequences his role had played in my life. It was the only way to protect myself, to protect my heart. I held on to my anger and fear as I imagined him sitting here in my room while I was on the other side of that door using my own fingers while thinking of him, of this man I should have feared above all else.

Oh gods. Had he heard me?

“What are you doing in here?” I looked back to the door, but it was fully shut, sealing the two of us off from everyone else.

“What would you have me do?” He ran his hands through his hair before letting them fall between his thighs.

“What?” I tightened my hold on my towel.

“You won’t leave this room. Mina says that you refuse to let anyone in. Gods know you don’t want me in here.” He glared up at me in frustration. “What. Would. You. Have. Me. Do?” Every word was a clear demand for answers.

“Let me go.”

“You are no prisoner here, princess, but I refuse to allow them to have you again. I cannot bear to watch my brother take from you against your will.”

“Like you?” I snapped.

“You begged me.”

“That was when I thought—”

“Thought what, princess?” he interrupted me before I could even form my thoughts. “That we were mates? You may hate me right now, but that doesn’t change the fact that you are my mate.”

“And Thalia?” My jealousy bled out even though I tried to force it down. “What about her?”

“What about Thalia?” He asked the question through clenched teeth.

“Is she simply your lover, or do you drink from her to take her power? You told me that you had never fed from another Starblessed before, but I guess everything between us was a lie.”

He was a prince split between two kingdoms. Of course, he lied.

A dark shadow passed over his face, and I could see the error of my words staring back at me. “Thalia has been with me since Gavril decided he was through with her. He took every bit of power he thought he could get from her, then he washed his hands. I brought her here without his knowledge.”

His words, that truth, it knocked the breath from my lungs. “She was his Starblessed?”

“She was his toy while he waited for you to come of age.”

Guilt slashed through me and ate at my gut. This woman, Thalia, she had been used in ways that I couldn’t even begin to imagine. Gavril had taken from me once, but the scars on Thalia’s arms…

“You saved her?”

“Thalia saved herself. She fought Gavril every step of the way, and I was just her way out.” He spoke in a low voice as his jaw clenched. “You could learn a lot from her. She has mastered the power that runs through her so she will never allow another to use her weakness against her again. I think Thalia could help you a lot while I’m away.”

I stared at him as I considered his words. Was that really what he wanted for me? For me to become unusable in a way that even he couldn’t force my hand? For me to become a weapon only I could wield?

“Thalia is one of my dearest friends. I would like for the two of you to become the same. Train with her.”

“No.” I shook my head. It didn’t matter what he said. It didn’t matter that he pointed out the similarities between us. She was a part of this court, and that meant I couldn’t trust her.

“Then marry me.”

I jolted back so harshly that I almost dropped my towel. Evren eyes tracked my movements with the precision of a hunter.

“What?” I shook my head as I tried to clear it. “I will never marry you, Evren.”

Thoughts of what might have been flooded me, but he wasn’t the man I once thought him to be. He was the blood prince, the sole heir to this kingdom that I still feared.

He grinned, but it didn’t meet his hollow eyes. “I’m not asking for you to love me, princess. I don’t even need you to accept that we are mates. But our marriage will protect our world.”

I didn’t believe a word that passed his lips. It was another manipulation, another play in his game.

“How? How is me marrying you anything more than your revenge?”

“A prince born of blood,” he began, and my gaze snapped to meet his.

“Another of power. One will defeat. One will cower. The rage of the stars burned in her skin. Without her fate his rule can’t begin.”

I stared at him wordlessly as I played those words echoed in my head. But I couldn’t make sense of them.

“That prophecy has been burned in my brain since I was a child. If Gavril is to marry you, the cruelty of my father’s rule will look like child’s play.”

Fear like I had never known before crept up my spine and took root. “And what if the prophecy is referring to you? What if you are the one I should be wary of?”

“We both know that it isn’t.”

“I don’t know anything.” I spat as I watched him carefully. “Other than the fact that I can’t trust either of you.”

“How do we know the prophecy is about me? There are dozens of other Starblessed in this world. Thalia is in this palace right now.” I pointed toward the door. “Marry her.”

My chest tightened as I said the words. I didn’t want to be used as a pawn in their game. A game among kingdoms was dangerous, and I was simply being dangled between the two princes who were both as lethal as they were powerful.

“It’s you, princess.” He stared up at me, and the marks on my skin came to life with his conviction. “You are the reason my father and Queen Kaida have tried to keep the prophecy hidden. I knew it the moment I met you that it was you who the prophecy spoke of. It is you who will change our world.”

“I don’t want to change your world.” I shook my head and my wet hair slid over my shoulders. Evren tracked the movement before standing and running his hands along the front of his trousers. I didn’t know what I wanted, but it wasn’t this. Thoughts of Evren and I running away, of us being alone with no politics of this world to determine our future, flooded my mind. But that was a fool’s dream.

I was nothing more than a girl with marred skin, and he was born to rule.

“We don’t get to choose our destiny, Adara, but we do get to decide what role we’ll play in it. You are inevitably linked to my family, and you have the choice between him and me. You can take my hand willingly, or my brother will force yours.” His words were scathing, and his jaw clenched as he watched me.

“I don’t want to choose either.” Both choices invoked a fear I couldn’t ignore.

His dark gaze narrowed, and I looked away from him as I said the next words. “I just want to leave.”

“That’s impossible.” His voice lowered to a whisper as he stepped closer to me until he was standing but a breath away. He lifted his fingers, and I tensed as his skin pressed against my collarbone. He dipped his middle finger, tracing over a drop of water that had fallen from my hair, and he ran it along the length of my shoulder.

“You may hate being here with me, Adara, but letting you go would mean to allow you back into his arms. If you leave, Gavril will find you. If you choose him, I will have no choice but to respect that, but I will fight like hell to make sure you don’t.”

“The entire time.” I stared down at his finger as it slid down my arm. “You were planning this the entire time?”

“I had no choice, princess.” His hand stilled and gripped the back of my elbow. “I’ve seen what my brother is capable of.” His hand shuddered against my skin. “But if you think for one fucking second that I regret the choices I made that got you here, you’re wrong. I would do it all over again to have you standing in front of me.”

“You would betray me again so willingly?”

“I would tear apart the world, princess. Even if that meant hurting you to make sure you weren’t with him. I would make you hate me all over again just to make sure you were safe.”

“To make sure you were here with me.” His fingers trailed across my skin, tracing every inch of me with meticulous precision. “To make sure that I can touch you again.”

“That’s not what I want.” My voice shook because what I had just said was both the truth and a lie. I wanted him, but I feared him just the same.

“Isn’t it?” He leaned closer until his mouth rested against my ear. I trembled against him as I waited for him to speak again. “Your body is practically begging me for it. All I need is your words, princess.”

I shook my head as moisture pooled between my thighs. Gods, I needed what he was promising. I wanted it, but I knew that I shouldn’t.

A chill ran up my spine as I felt his power release from him, and before I could blink, his dark magic swirled around me.

“Just whisper it in the dark, Adara.” His words echoed against my skin and his lips followed them in a gentle graze. “You are my mate, but I can be your secret sin if that’s what you want. I will be whatever it takes to be able to touch you again.”

His magic danced along my neck before it skimmed over my lips and stole a rush of breath from my lungs.

“I…” I hesitated and my fingers dug into my towel, the only piece of fabric separating him and me. “Please.”

“You have to do better than that.” His teeth grazed against my neck with a bite of pain and a soft whimper fell from my lips. “Tell me you want me. Tell me you’ve been dying for my touch just as badly as I have been dying for yours.”

“I… want you.” My voice shook just as his darkness fell over my eyes. I could still see him standing in front of me, but it was as if his magic knew. The touch of his magic against my skin, the reminder of the darkness that lay inside both of us, it was exactly what I needed. Because as much as I was dying for him, I didn’t want to feel that way. I didn’t want to allow myself to crave someone who was so bad for me. “Please, Evren. I want you.”

The words had barely passed my lips when his hands wrapped around the backs of my thighs and lifted me against him. I didn’t hesitate to wrap my legs around him as he pushed forward, and our bodies hit the wall behind me.

My words had possessed him. My own want was driving his.

His mouth came down against mine, rough and claiming, and I didn’t stop him. I kissed him back just as harshly, and I hated how desperately I clung to him.

His hands were hard and frantic as they touched every part of my skin they could reach. He pressed his hips against mine, and I could feel the dagger at his side that dug into my flesh. It was a reminder that he was always ready for any threat that lay before us. It was a reminder that hit me in the chest that he was going to leave.

I whimpered against his lips, and he groaned before pushing off the wall and heading toward the doorway.

“What are you doing?” I panicked and tried to cling to the fabric of my towel to wrap it around me, but Evren’s arms had me completely caged in as he reached for the handle and stormed through the door.

“Not here.” He looked down at me before making his way across the hall. I didn’t see anyone, but that didn’t make me feel better. I was in the middle of the hall of the Sidra Palace, wrapped in nothing but a towel and their prince. “I want you in my bed.”

His power shot out of him, and his door opened before we made the final step in its direction. His dark, power-laced hand lifted, pressed against my jaw, and he turned my head until I had no choice but to look back at him.

His mouth met mine again, crushing, pleading, begging, and I wanted to give him everything he asked for. In that moment, I couldn’t remember why I wasn’t supposed to want this man. Why I didn’t want to accept his offer.

It was just me and him and my power coursing through my body and imploring me to ask him for more.

I couldn’t think of what was to come. These stolen moments were all we had, and my fingers dug into his skin as I held on to it with everything I had.

Evren kicked the door shut behind him, but he didn’t give me time to take in his room. He pushed across the space before he dropped me down against his bed, and I gripped his dark green bedding in my hands as I stared up at him.

My towel lay beneath me, leaving me completely exposed to him, and he rubbed his hand along his jaw as he stared. Lust and admiration. It was all I could see in his eyes, and it messed with my head.

“You are so fucking beautiful.” He pulled his shirt from his waistband before reaching behind his shoulders and pulling it over his head. “I am so undeserving.”

He tossed his shirt to the ground before he fell to his knees before me. I didn’t have time to question if that was what I wanted. Evren quickly wrapped his hands around my thighs and jerked me to the edge of the bed before spreading me open in front of him.

“Let me show you, princess.” He pressed a soft kiss on the inside of my right knee, and I jerked beneath his touch. I was wet, so wet, and I knew he could see how badly I wanted him. “Let me show you the depth of my need. How desperate I am to worship you and erase every trace of my betrayal.”

I slammed my eyes closed against his words. That was everything I wanted. I wanted him to take it away, to destroy this ache inside of me, but I also knew that I needed to cling to it. I needed to remember that this man who could bring me so much pleasure was also responsible for causing so much pain. And he was capable of causing far more.

If I allowed myself to forget, I feared I would lose myself completely. The future I wanted and the future destiny laid before us were vastly different. I couldn’t allow myself to get lost in the fantasy and forget the truth of my fate.

His mouth moved to the other knee, his lips barely a whisper against my skin, and I tried to close my thighs as a shock wave of lust coursed through my core.

“No, princess.” Evren shook his head against my thigh, and I opened my eyes to look at him. “There’s no fucking hiding here. In this room, there is no pretending to be who we aren’t. I am your mate, and I’m going to devour you. Now, spread your legs like a good girl and let me have what’s mine.”

I shouldn’t have been turned on by his words. I shouldn’t have loosened my muscles and allowed my outer thighs to press against the bed, but I did. I did both as I watched him lower his head and press a gentle kiss to the top of my sex.

“Eyes on me, Adara. I want to watch you as you come against my mouth.”

It was impossible not to obey him, not as he breathed me in deeply, or as he licked his lips as he ran a dark, magic-stained finger down the slit of me. It was torturous watching him, and I had to bite down on my tongue to keep myself from begging.

This man was equal parts fae and vampyre, equal parts of both kingdoms I hated, and still I was willing to beg.

Evren pulled away and lifted my right thigh in his hand, kissing the inside of it before he placed it over his shoulder. “I could do this all day.” His fingers dug into my flesh as he nuzzled against my leg and his breath rushed out against my sex.

“Torturing me?” I asked with a rushed and desperate voice.

“Devoting myself to your pleasure.” He leaned forward and rolled his tongue through my sex before he sucked my nub into his wicked mouth.

I cried out as my back bowed off the bed. This man had barely touched me, and already, I felt like I was falling apart.

He devoured me then, no longer giving me teasing touches or whispers of promises. He was a man starved, and he took every bit of his hunger out on my flesh.

“Evren,” I cried out his name. “Oh gods, please.”

His arms slid beneath me, lifting my hips off the bed, and I didn’t have time to realize what was happening until he flipped us over and I was sitting on his chest. I pressed my hands into his shoulders, still desperate with want and off-kilter from the change.

“Sit on my face, princess. I want to watch you fuck your pleasure from my mouth.”

When I hesitated, he took the indecision from me. His hands tugged my thighs forward, and he didn’t stop until he groaned with his mouth pressed against my sex.

I ran my trembling fingers through his dark hair as I stared down at him. How could this man make me feel so wrecked with equal parts of pleasure and pain. He was everything I wanted and everything I knew I should run from simultaneously.

“Gods, you taste so fucking sweet.” He sucked my nub into his mouth, and I slammed my hand against his headboard to keep myself from falling.

Everything about this was too much, yet I was desperate for more.

He was staring up at me, and I couldn’t look away even though I would save myself so much heartbreak if I did. My magic was raging inside of me, begging me for release, and I wasn’t sure how much more I could handle.

“Ride me, princess.” Evren gripped my bottom in his hands and started moving my hips until I was grinding against his mouth. Insecurity and wavering thoughts shot through my mind before he destroyed them. “Just like that. Show me how bad you want me.”

His hands stopped their movement but dug into my flesh, and I rode him just like he had instructed me to. One hand still gripping his hair, the other using the headboard as leverage, I ground down against his mouth as he sucked, licked, and nipped at my flesh.

“Oh gods.” I closed my eyes as I moved harder against him. I was close. So damn close. I could feel my release rising inside me like a tsunami desperate to crash. I just needed a little more.

“Say you’re my mate, Adara.” My eyes flew open and slammed back into his. “Just whisper those fucking words, and I’ll give you anything you want.”

I shook my head as my hand tightened into his hair. It didn’t matter that I knew the truth of them inside myself. Saying them out loud to him was something different entirely. I would be giving him a power I didn’t want him to have.

A power I feared he would use against me. I couldn’t allow him to become my weakness when my future would be determined by my strength.

A river was rushing through me, pulling me with the current, but I only wanted to stay here with him. I clung to him in desperation, because I knew the moment I opened my mouth, I would drown.

He would fill my lungs, suffocate me, and I would have no control.

I could either drown in him or get lost as I drifted endlessly.

But even that fear couldn’t stop me from giving him what he wanted, from giving him the truth.

“You’re my mate.” The words fell from my lips, and Evren growled against me before he sucked my nub into his mouth again. His hands gripped harshly against my bottom, not allowing an inch of space between me and his mouth, and he didn’t let up until my body shook against him and my screams of pleasure echoed through the room.

Pleasure was still racking through my body as I watched my magic swirling around my fingertips. Uncontrollable. That was exactly how I felt as Evren slid from beneath me and cursed as he settled behind me and ran his fingers down my spine.

I was utterly out of control.

A shock wave of want soared through me, and I gripped both hands on the headboard as I tried to put even an inch of space between us.

I could hear him working his trousers behind me, and I jerked forward again when his rough fingers pressed against my sex. He gathered the moisture there, rubbing it back and forth until I was coated from my nub all the way to my bottom.

“This is for me, mate.” He growled and his voice was almost unrecognizable. I looked back at him over my shoulder as I watched him take me in. “You are fucking dripping for me.” He lifted his hand and brought his dark fingers to his mouth. He looked me directly in the eyes as he slowly slid them between his lips and devoured my want from his skin as if he had never wanted to taste anything more.

His other hand was gripping his cock, rubbing back and forth as he stared at me. “Hold on to that headboard tightly.” He moved closer to me and ran his length through my sex. “I have no control when it comes to you.”

My fingers dug into the dark wood just as he lined himself up and pushed inside of me. My breath rushed out of me and my magic surged.

“Gods, I love seeing you like this.” He pulled out of me slowly and then pushed back in, over and over, as he groaned. “That’s it. You’re taking me so well.”

My sex clamped down around him as wave after wave of want and pleasure shot through me.

He slowly ran his hand up my spine as he thrust into me, and I could feel my magic wrapping around his hand and arm without me doing a thing. It was as desperate for him as I was.

His hand didn’t stop until he pressed it against the front of my throat, and he squeezed until I was forced to pull my hands away from the headboard and press my back against his chest.

I felt so much fuller like this, to the point I wasn’t sure I couldn’t handle much more.

His thumb lifted and pressed against my jaw, and he turned my head until his mouth could meet mine. He nipped at my lips before kissing me slowly and desperately while he continued to thrust into me.

His other hand slid across my breast, rolling my nipple between his fingers, and I cried into his mouth as I pushed my chest harder into his hand.

“So perfect,” he murmured against my lips before dragging his hand slowly down my stomach until it met the spot where we were connected. He slid his fingers through me, but he never stopped thrusting. I didn’t know what to concentrate on. I couldn’t decipher which feeling was the one I was desperate to chase.

“I’m filling you up so perfectly, princess.” His fingers skated over my nub, and I bit down on his bottom lip as my body shook. “You need me? You need me to fuck you until you’re unable to move without remembering me inside of you?”

“Yes,” I cried out and wrapped my arm around the back of his neck. He was surrounding me, filling me so fully, yet I still needed more.

I wanted to feel him like fire in my bones, burning me alive with everything that he was.

“Good girl,” he whispered against my mouth just as his hand pulled away from my sex and came back down hard. The slap against my sex ricocheted through my body, and I couldn’t hold it back any longer.

I cried out his name like a prayer of desperation, and he held me to him as he slammed into me over and over again. My pleasure coursed through me on the edge of pain, but it was the kind of pain I would chase for the rest of my life. He plunged inside me one final time with his hands gripping into my flesh and his low growl echoed through the room.

We sat like that for a long time. Our thighs pressed together, his arms still holding me, and our breathing ragged and reckless.

As my pleasure settled, my heart rate skyrocketed. Everything about him scared me, and I had been willing to give him too much. I gave him more than I ever should have ever allowed.

In that moment, I felt like I would follow him to the end of our world, and I would willingly destroy it to stay at his side.

And nothing frightened me more. That truth coursed through me, my magic feeling its truth with every spark of its power, and my chest ached. I had been prepared to do anything for him, all while he was lying to me.

“I need to go back to my room.” I tried to pull away from him, but his arms tightened against me and his forehead pressed against the back of my neck.

“Please don’t do this.”

Panic clawed at my chest, a caged animal looking to rage, and I knew I needed to leave.

“Let me go, Evren. I want to go back to my room.”

His hands shook against my skin, but he finally let out a harsh breath against me before letting them fall to my sides. I scrambled away from him, and I could feel the proof of what we had just done dripping down the inside of my thighs.

I quickly grabbed his shirt from where it lay discarded on the floor, and I pulled it over my head. I needed the protection, anything to put space between us.

Evren was still kneeling on the bed before me, and I could hardly look at him without feeling regret. It wasn’t what we had just did that filled me with anguish. It was regrets over why we were here. Regrets over what fate had forced us into. I regretted forcing myself to take another heavy step away when every part of me was begging me to return to him.

“Stay.” He reached out for me, but I took another hurried step back.

“No.” I shook my head and wrapped my arms around myself as doubt and fear ate at me. “I shouldn’t have let you bring me in here in the first place.”

He swallowed hard as he flinched back from my words. “Don’t fool yourself into thinking you didn’t want this.” He ran his hands through his hair, but I couldn’t stop myself from looking down his body. Every part of him was chiseled from years of work and dedication. He was a warrior in every sense of the word, and it was masterful to see.

And it was just the reminder I needed to remember who he was. He was a prince first and a warrior second, and he wasn’t mine at all.

“I need to leave.” I looked back up at his face, and he looked so dark and beautiful still kneeling before me. “This can’t happen again.”

“We both know that’s a lie.” He climbed from the bed, and I stepped back to put more space between us. “We both know neither one of us is capable of staying away from the other.”

“I don’t know that.” I tried to convince him along with myself.

“You are so fucking good at so many things, princess, but lying isn’t one of them.” He ran his thumb over his bottom lip, and I felt desperate to go to him and pull that lip into my mouth. “Your body was craving me just as badly as I was craving you.”

“I’ll find someone else to crave.”

He stopped on his path toward me, and I could see his magic swirling in his eyes. Dirty, dark, beautiful magic.

“Don’t say things like that to me, Adara.” His hands fisted at his sides. “I will destroy anyone who even thinks about touching what’s mine.”

“I’m not yours.”

“The fuck you aren’t,” he growled. “I’ll let you keep telling yourself that if that’s what you need, but just remember what you cried out to me just moments ago. Remember that I am your fucking mate, and there is no one else who can give you the things that I can.”

I watched him without saying a word. My chest rose and fell harshly, and the warring feelings inside me felt like they were soon to crash.

“I hate you.”

“Yet the way you fuck me says otherwise.” He lifted his hand and ran the tip of his finger along his tongue. “There’s a fine line between hate and love, princess, and the taste of your pleasure on my fingers tells me you loved every fucking second of what just happened.”

My stomach clenched, and I reached for the door handle at my back. If I didn’t leave this room, he would have me on my knees begging him for more.

It opened with a loud groan, and Evren’s gaze shot to my hand. “Run back to your room.” He ran his hand down his cock, and I couldn’t stop myself from watching him. “I know where to find you.”