Chapter 38

CHAPTER38

The only way to control a pack of werewolves is to be the Alpha.

And the only way for an Alpha to become an Alpha is either to inherit the position or to kill for it. Until the Alpha’s dying breath leaves their body, their thoughts and their rules are obeyed. Only then does the power shift to the next in line.

But you have to be a werewolf first.

Or a hybrid.

I feel Semyon’s orders scuttle into my brain as my transformation spiders through my veins.

Take the vampires alive.

Kill the rest.

Only it’s too late for him. There’s no coming back from the damage I inflicted before I injected the serum into my neck. Semyon’s last breath shudders through his throat as I grip his flesh between my teeth.

But it’s just a fraction of time too long to stop the hybrid that clamps down on Ashen’s shoulder.

Semyon’s last, rattling breath is muted by my scream.

Everything around us stops.

The hybrid releases Ashen’s shoulder as though she’s just bitten hot iron.

The werewolves that are closing in around us go still, their glowing eyes blinking at us in the wind and snow. They watch us for a long moment before they point their muzzles to the sky and howl. The hybrids add their wraithish calls into the storm.

I feel all their thoughts at my command.

And it hurts. Like there’s not enough space for them in my head. Like all my blood is turning from liquid to solid. All my muscles are growing stiff. All my joints are made of points of glass sharp enough to cut the bone they bind together. I claw at consciousness as the battlefield spins around me. Every move I make to crawl toward Ashen is agony. But all I care about is getting to where he kneels with his hand over his torn shoulder, panting in the snow.

I raise my wrist to my lips, shuddering with a sudden feeling of ice beneath my skin. I bite down as I drag myself closer to Ashen. My teeth quiver within my flesh as I watch him fall to his back.

“All right, vampire?” he whispers through rapid, painful breaths. He reaches for me as I draw near. I know he can feel the panic that burns the mark on my chest, just like I can feel his sorrow and resignation. My shoulders quake but I refuse to answer when I pull my wrist away.

“Gasaan… tiildibba me… zi ab…” I say, shivering, so cold, freezing cold in every cell. I hold my arm above his wound as blood drips into the marred skin. “Tirrama salutti… sa kassapti sa… ruhi ipusu… supii arkis ups…”

Ashen’s color is draining away before my eyes. I hear his heart pounding the venom through his veins. He raises his hand to my cheek. It’s so much colder than it should be. “My Lu. I’m sorry, my vampire. I’m so sorry. You were so brave.”

I feel every tear that flows across my skin. This can’t be all we have. It can’t be all we get. After all we’ve suffered, apart and together. This can’t be it.

“No, Ashen. I… can do this… Itti memes sa zu… sa sumri… Ittis memes sa…”

“Lu,” he whispers as I falter on the spell. The fire in Ashen’s eyes is dimming. Bursting blood vessels color the whites red. A cough rattles in his chest and he pulls me down for a last embrace. “There is no great risk left to take. We have taken them all.”

I lay my ear to his chest and shudder within Ashen’s embrace. His heart sings its last desperate song to me in a broken, stuttering rhythm.

No great risk left to take.

I gasp for air. Ashen’s arms have no strength left to hold on as I push myself up from his chest. “I love you, Ashen,” I say. I look in his eyes as my tears drip down onto his shirt.

Timing is everything.

Before he can take another breath, I draw my kaiken from my thigh and slide it across his throat in the deepest cut I can manage with my waning strength.

Ashen’s eyes go wide, his expression desperate.

“I’m sorry,” I whisper. I drop my blade and lay one hand to his face, the other to his chest where his mark is losing heat beneath my palm. “I’m sorry. I’m right here, Ashen. Everything is okay.”

Ashen passes away with the sound of my voice in his ears, the feel of my hand on his skin. I send my love with him as I press my hand to his chest and watch his eyes dim.

His last breath flows across his lips as I send him to death with a kiss.

I don’t blink.

I don’t move as Ediye crashes down next to my side and grips my shoulders, calling my name.

I only wait.

And then the first gray flake lifts from Ashen’s skin.

I let out an anguished cry of relief. Sparks and ash swirl with the snow and drift toward the sky. I cradle my face in my hands as Ediye wraps her arms around me.

“You did it, Lu. He’s going back. You did it,” she whispers in my ear as she squeezes me tight. “He’s all right, Lu… Lu?.. Lu!”

Ediye’s voice grows faint as though she’s drifting away down a tunnel. I close my eyes as she lays me on my back in the snow. I find the minds of the hybrids and wolves and whisper my wishes to them. Akaassi kunusi, akammi kunusi anna naga. I whisper it as many times as I can before I can’t keep hold of the words anymore.

“No, Lu… You’re my best friend. You’re my soulmate. Please, please stay,” Ediye begs. I feel her hand on my face and open my eyes. Tears slide down her skin, but she tries to stay strong, even though she knows I see every tremble in her lip.

“Thought… it would… work…” My brief smile is swept clean by a wave of pain. My body shudders. “Love you…”

Hard to breathe. I’m scared. So scared.

A sob breaks through as Ediye’s armor crumbles. “I love you, Lu. I love you. Do you hear me, Lu? Lu-”

I do. My name. A scream.

The last thing I hear.

Tick, tick, tick.

I open my eyes, blinking into the dim light. I press my hands onto the stone by my sides and rise from the floor. There’s a black wall in front of me of polished obsidian. Rings within rings click in opposite directions. In the center is a gleaming sphere of black tourmaline.

Just like when I was in Leander’s mind, I take a step closer. Silver glyphs flare to life along the rings. It’s the same language as before, but different words.

The ticking grows louder in my head as I take another step closer to the wall. A ribbon of whispering voices twists around me in an invisible knot. I reach for the orb at the center of the rings and touch my fingertip to its cool, slick surface.

I’m hit with a wall of sound, a final tick that’s like a crash through my skull.

My lungs suck in a breath that fills every spongy crevice of their chambers. It feels like I’ve never breathed before.

I twist and writhe but there’s pressure on my shoulders that keeps me down. I thrash my legs and open my eyes.

“Just breathe, Lu. Go slow. You’re safe,” Ashen says. His hands are warm on my skin.

“Ash…en?..”

A smile blooms across his face as he watches my confused expression and the way I gulp in air like I’m drowning. His eyes look glassy as he nods. My gaze darts to the room around us but keeps coming back to him. I’m afraid he’ll disappear.

“R-re…al... Real?”

He lets out a breath of a laugh. “Yes,” he says, touching the mark on my chest. It tingles and warms. It’s an anchor, the only thing still tethering my battered soul to my bones. “This is real, my vampire. My reckless, brave, brilliant vampire. You are in the Resurrection Chamber in the Shadow Realm.”

A whole new wave of panic hits me like a gale. I try to scramble to my feet but Ashen holds me in place.

“Slowly, Lu. You are safe. I promise you.”

I’m shaking violently when Ashen pulls me to his chest. He wraps his arms around me and folds the edges of his black robe across my back, trying to cover every inch of exposed skin that he can.

“I-I was w-wrong,” I whisper into his shoulder through chattering teeth.

“About what?”

“K-killing you. It g-got old.”

Ashen laughs and grips me tighter. “Finally,” he says, and I fall to pieces that he tries to keep together in his embrace.

I let it all go. The fear and adrenaline of battle. The triumph and sorrow of winning and losing everything in a single moment. The panic and despair and shock. Ediye’s heart-splitting scream that still rings in my ears.

I feel like I’m being carried away in a strong current and I grasp onto whatever I can that will get me through this place. Love. Hope. Relief and possibility. The same things that Ashen feels, their essence rippling beneath my skin. He pulls away, holding my face in his hands.

“Are you okay?” Ashen asks, surveying my face and looking for anything different.

“Still cold,” I say. “But better. Like… balance. I feel like… more. I just don’t know how.”

It’s the truth, I do feel better. There’s no lingering whisper of a headache or residual burn in my throat or strange surge of power that feels like light is ready to consume me whenever it sees fit. Everything feels under my control, it’s just I’m not yet sure what that everything is.

But in this moment, I don’t even care. All that matters right now is that I’m here, and Ashen is here, and Ediye and the others will know by now that we at least made it this far. So we just spend a moment looking at each other. Ashen’s warm hand sweeps hair away from my face like I know he likes to do, and he follows the motion of his hand, lost in thought.

“I tried to tell myself how grateful I was that we had the days we had. I didn’t want you to feel afraid,” he whispers, still watching the progress of his hand through my strands of hair. “But in my heart it was not enough. I wanted more time. To be chosen the way you chose me, even if I’m not worthy of it, I wanted to keep it. After so many centuries feeling the presence of darkness in every step, the moments of light with you left me desperate for more. To watch you resurrecting next to me, to know I would have more time, even if measured only in moments… It is a happiness I have never known.”

My heart melts right through my chest, as hot and bright as liquid gold. I run my fingers across Ashen’s mark. It hums with life beneath my skin. “I want to kiss you.”

“Then kiss me.”

“But I’m some kind of hybrid now. What if I got it wrong? Maybe I’ve got Angelwing in my venom now. What if I kill you?”

Ashen’s eyes dance in the torchlight. Sparks ignite in his pupils. “Then our time truly will be measured in only moments, because I will give my life for that kiss.”

Before I can second guess it, Ashen’s lips press to mine and his tongue slips into my mouth. My heart pounds its way up my throat. He caresses the sharp edges of my teeth with his tongue and it draws a drop of venom into our kiss. I taste the sweet, honeyed nectar, the way my venom always tastes. I smell nothing different. No Angelwing. No scent of werewolf. Just me.

I break our kiss and look into Ashen’s eyes and I know he can feel my relief when I smile. Just like I can feel his desire for more, an overwhelming, insatiable need to take whatever he can claim.

I wrap my arms around his neck and we dive back into a kiss that has no more tentative softness. This is a bruising, desperate crash of a kiss. I taste a drop of blood when my teeth catch my lip. Venom coats my tongue when it slides over Ashen’s. I clasp fistfuls of his black silk robe and pull him down with me onto the stone altar.

“Have you ever fucked in the Resurrection Chamber before?” I ask with breathless need as his hands flow over my breasts and down my sides to grip my hips.

“No,” he says, nipping at my shoulder. “And someone could be down here any moment.”

I grasp the back of Ashen’s neck and catch his eyes, not letting go as I grip his hard length and center it between my legs. I give him a dark and sinful smile. “Then you’d better make it quick, Reaper.”

He flashes a wicked grin before he thrusts into me. I grit my teeth and stifle a gasp. Every stroke hits harder, deeper. My center grips his thickness like I’m pulling him in. He slides from the crown to the hilt of his cock with every thrust, devouring me with the kiss of a starving man, like he’s consuming my very soul.

My hands slip beneath Ashen’s robe and fan across his chest, pressing into the tense muscle of his shoulders. I trace the mist of sweat down his spine and grip his ass. He moans onto my tongue as he lifts my hips and cants them to drive against me in a way that has me breaking away to cry out with pleasure.

“Shhh, vampire,” Ashen whispers as his hand folds over my mouth. He keeps it there as a dark smile claims one corner of his lips. His eyes never leave mine as his free hand flows down my thigh, pressing heat into my flesh before lifting my leg and folding it behind his back. He continues to hit the same spot, again and again, every stroke pushing me closer to a blinding orgasm. I cry out, the sound muffled by his palm. “If only we had more time, I would drink from you in every way I could. But you’re going to need to come for me.”

My lips vibrate against his palm in a needy whimper and I tilt my head back, drawing his hand away from my mouth. I drag it down and fold his fingers across my throat. He grips it gently.

“Harder,” I whisper as my nails drag down his back.

Ashen’s eyes are bright with crimson flame as he thrusts in punishing strokes and increases the pressure around my neck. His voice comes out as little more than a hiss between his clenched teeth. “God save my soul. I wish you understood the power you have over me.”

I smile and it must look so sinful on my lips, because his eyes flare with sparks and I feel their heat as though they’re raining down on my skin. “No one is listening but me, Reaper. Now squeeze like a proper demon and give me every last drop you’ve got.”

He pauses just long enough for me to wonder if I’ve broken him. I cackle a wicked laugh and dig my fingernails deeper into his skin, getting ready to hold on for the ride.

“Oh, vampire. You are in imminent danger.”

“Of being fucked blind, I hope.”

“You have no idea.”

There are no more words after that.

Ashen slams into me. I’m surrounded by the sound of our skin slapping, of desperate grunts, of my back sliding up and down against the stone. I smell the paraffin on the torches and Ashen’s scent, ink and tobacco dried in the sun. I smell my arousal and our sweat and the damp rock walls of the humid subterranean room. But all I see is him. I don’t take my eyes from his, not even as he squeezes tighter and tighter and the edges of my vision blackens.

My back arches off the stone as a shattering orgasm tears through me, burning every nerve, twisting every muscle into knots. My pussy throbs around his length as my body grips onto his. A growl slips between Ashen’s teeth and his hand tightens around my throat. I feel his cock thicken and pulse as he spills into me, his body shuddering. It feels as though it’ll never end, and I don’t want it to. These waves of pleasure that we ride together, the feeling of him sliding within me as we come apart together, the feeling of being filled with him. If only I could trap time, I would live right here forever.

After longer than seems possible, Ashen’s strokes begin to slow and he gradually lifts the pressure from around my neck until he takes his hand away to kiss the bruises left behind. My vision clears with every restorative breath I take.

“You said killing me got old, but you are very clearly still trying,” Ashen says, his voice as rich as honey as he kisses the shell of my ear. I giggle as he nips at my ear lobe and I wrap my arms across his back, drawing him down to me. We lie for that for a moment as we recover our breath, but when he lifts his lips away from my ear to lay a kiss on my mouth I hear it.

A noise. Footsteps, growing closer to the room.

“Company,” I whisper, and Ashen meets my eyes for only an instant before he’s sliding out of me to grab a robe from a hook on the wall.

“You will be safe,” Ashen says as he holds it open for me to slide my arms in. There’s too much urgency in his voice for me to be overwhelmed with reassurance. “Just take my lead. Do everything I say.”

Nerves suddenly wipe out the pleasure I took just moments ago, even though I feel his cum and my arousal drip down my inner thighs as a slick reminder of what we just shared. Ashen ties the belt of the robe and catches my hand as the footsteps draw closer to the door.

“Trust me,” he begs as he squeezes my hand between both of his. “It’s going to be hard. It’s going to be really hard. But I have faith in you. I love you, my Lu. Do not forget it.”

The latch of the door clicks.

Ashen drops my hand. The flame in his eyes snuffs out as he stands straighter and looks down at me with cold indifference.

That switch is flipped. The one where the man I know becomes the one I don’t. And I’m suddenly unsure which one is real.

A sluice of dread drips down my spine.

I can’t feel him. I can’t feel him beneath my skin.

Two Reapers enter the room, dressed in black uniforms that seem more formal than the guards I’ve seen before.

“Bring my armor,” Ashen says to them over his shoulder, his hard stare not leaving mine. “Summon the Council. Tell Eshkar and Imogen to meet us in the Kur.”

“Sir?”

“Tell them the Master of War has returned with their prize. The finished weapon that will win our war against the Realm of Light.”