Chapter 12

CHAPTER12

The light is low when I wake. I’m facing the open window, the sounds of evening within the Khan el-Khalili market vibrant from the street below. A single oil lamp burns on a desk, the gentle flame casting a warm glow through the ornate green chimney. I can see the bubbles and imperfections in the glass as clearly as if it were right next to my face. My vision is back to normal. Maybe better than before.

My veins buzz like they’re filled with a thunderstorm. I feel like I’m powering up with every breath. Energy surges in each beat of my heart.

This is new. I feel new.

And… weird.

Kinda… wild. Feline. Animalistic. Like I could either tear something apart or fuck it into oblivion.

I tamp down that strange sensation and touch my hand to my neck. The tracheostomy is gone. The skin is smooth and unblemished beneath my fingertips. I draw my hand away and turn it over to find my nails regrown, their tips smoothed into perfect, gentle curves. I breathe in the faint smell of silver and steel, and my pulse starts to climb until I detect the scent of Ediye and slip my hand beneath my pillow, grazing the handle of my kaiken. I know she must have put it there as a comfort I’d want to keep close.

My hand pulls away from the blade and I feel my forehead. It’s cool and dry to the touch. There’s no more film of sweat. No more fever. No hum of pain in my head or needles scraping at my eyes. The burn in my throat is little more than a dull ache. Raw, but so much better than before. It’s a candle where there was once an inferno. I swallow, unsure that this could be real.

The steady drum of another heart pulls my attention away from my own body. I look down to my side . Ashen sits next to my bed in the chair he dragged next to me during the procedure. He rests his head on his folded arms and part of one of mine. His face is turned toward me, his steady breath spilling warmth over my uncovered shoulder. He’s beautiful even in sleep. His dark hair falls across his forehead and skims his brows. Thick lashes fan beneath his closed eyes. His full lips are squished by his arm, making an adorable, tiny ‘O’. Half of me has an urge to smack it. The other half wants that mouth to do other very reckless, ill-advised things, and the mere thought sends a rush of feral heat to my core.

I trap a sudden swell of need and contain it in my chest. I just watch for a while. I’ve never seen the demon sleep, he always woke before me in the short time we were together. And now, in this moment of solitude, I think it’s maybe the most angelic thing I’ve ever seen. I reach out a tentative hand and move the strands of hair that obscure his skin in a touch so gentle that he doesn’t even stir.

I smell lilacs before I notice the faint beat of another heart in the hall. I look to the door and find Davina standing in the shadows of the corridor, watching. I think I should say something but I don’t know what, or if I even can. I’m not sure if my voice is really back or not. And this might sound selfish, but I don’t want to spend my first words on her, even if I know deep down it’s not her fault. She looks at me for a long, silent moment, then gives a twitch of a fleeting and sorrowful smile before she gently closes the door and pads away down the hall.

I have an urge to thank her. But, for some reason, also a much, much greater urge to kill her. Viciously. Like, a bathe-in-her-blood, cast-spells-from-her-bones kind of killing. I’m not sure why.

No, scratch that. I am sure why.

For re-existing. For taking what was mine.

I shudder as a murderous urge slithers down my spine. More murderous than usual. By a lot. And that’s saying something, because, hello… vampire.

Fuck, I’m feeling really weird. Not bad weird, more like maniacal weird. I’ve determined that my emotional state has distilled into two primal emotions:

A desire to fuck people up,

Or,

A desire to just… fuck… people.

Specifically one person.

One person whose cognac eyes are now fused to mine with a legit note of suspicion and alarm. Which is probably wise, because right now my desires are balanced on the sharpened edge of a knife.

Fuck it,

Or,

Fuck it up.

Ashen sits up a little with his arm still resting against my side. He moves slowly, as though cornered by a wild beast. His eyes dart across my face. He’s assessing the threat. Now that he’s awake, the crackle in my veins is ten times stronger. My need ignites like a fuse. To do what, I’m not sure. And I don’t think I’m fully in control of the decision.

“Lu-”

I hiss. Oh fuck yeah, that felt good.

“Leucosia-”

I hiss again.

“...vampire?”

I narrow my eyes in a fierce glare. Ashen sits a bit straighter and glances over his shoulder toward the door. He must have heard it click closed when Davina left. Maybe he even knew she was here. Or worse, expected her. My mind spirals into a jealous rage and I hiss again, a deep, enraged, vicious hiss. Ashen’s eyes snap back to mine and his spine fuses as straight as a sword, his palms facing me in a placating gesture.

“Okaaay vampire…”

I sit up, moving with careful precision. My muscles feel taut with the power I once had. But there’s more. There’s a spark in my flesh. I sit straight and pay only passing attention to the blanket that falls away from my torso. I hold my arms out, expecting to see the light that I feel beneath my skin. Nothing looks different. It’s definitely there, though. And zipping through it is the charge of Ashen’s blood. It’s like I swallowed an electric current and captured the power in my veins.

I look down at my body and run my hand over the spot where the feeding tube had been. There’s no pain. Not even a mark. I wonder how long I’ve been out, but I don’t want to ask. Those will not be my first spoken words. I’m saving those for something special.

I’m still running my fingers across my cool, clean skin when I hear Ashen’s chair creak as though he’s trying to edge away. My head whips in his direction and I pin him with a fierce glare. He leans back a fraction, his hands raised toward me in a bid to invoke calm. I see him swallow and it finally registers in my head that I’m topless. His eyes haven’t left mine and that enrages me even more. He was supposed to like boobs. I even have a note about it. Why isn’t he fucking looking at my boobs? Though if he does, I might slap him. I haven’t decided. But either way, he’s a fucking asshole.

I turn my torso fully toward him like a dare. I can see in his eyes that he has no idea what to make of me. Hell, I have no idea what to make of me. I tilt my head and my glare constricts into thin slits of brightening red light. There’s a cacophonous argument in my head of why-aren’t-you-looking, look-down-you-motherfucker, if-you-look-I-will-murder-you, and I’m not sure which voice is going to win.

“All right, vampire?” Ashen asks with a note so thick with wariness that it hangs like a bright star in his voice.

My head dips low like a tiger homing in on its prey. My fangs descend and venom floods my mouth. And then I see it, the quick flash of his eyes to my boobs.

I launch off the bed and knock into him with every ounce of strength I’ve got. It’s like hitting a brick wall, but I’ve still got enough power to topple us both to the floor. Ashen falls on his back and I land with reclaimed vampiric grace to straddle him. His hands are still up in that dumbass, placating gesture. It makes me want to cut them off and chuck them across the room. He’s a Reaper, for fucksakes. He could kill me faster than I could blink. Well, almost. Maybe not today. But trying to mollify me is just pissing me off even more.

Ashen’s eyes dart down to my body again and I look down at myself, realizing that I’m fully naked. It’s either really convenient, or grounds for murder.

I sit back on Ashen, glaring down at the Reaper who looks like a man standing at a crossroads without a map. He swallows again. The movement is delicious and I’m feeling ravenous for anything carnal.

My eyes follow the pattern of the tattoos on his neck that dive beneath his collar. They make a slow procession down the buttons of his perfectly pressed black shirt, then back up the markings on one of his arms. I follow the lines of muscle beneath his sleeve. My gaze stalks across his shoulder, up his throat, along the angle of his jaw and cheekbone. When I meet his eyes again, the dim spark of a flame grows brighter within his pupils.

His arousal stiffens beneath me. He knows I feel it. I can see it in his eyes, that look of desire so overwhelming that it hurts, burning you from within. Our gazes fuse together, connected by an unbreakable chain. My heart rams into its bone cage.

We move in the same instant. One second I’m glaring down at Ashen, the next I’m wrapped in his arms, consumed by his kiss. I grip his hair with one hand and his shoulder with the other and draw him into me. His hands press into my flesh as they flow across my back.

The kiss is feral. Bruising. Vicious with need. We devour one another. I tear his shirt open and the buttons ping and scatter across the floor. He sheds it like snake scales. I suck his bottom lip between my teeth and scrape my fangs across the delicate skin, drawing a thin thread of blood into my mouth. It’s a match that lights a fuse.

Ferocious desire detonates in my veins and I dig my fingernails into his back. I smirk when I feel him tense and lean into the pain. The tone of my breathy laugh is husky and dark. It’s like smoke in a room filled with shadows and dim light. It doesn’t sound like me at all. But I like it. I dig my nails in deeper and Ashen growls, lifting us from the floor, kissing me harder, his need matching mine one heartbeat to the next.

Ashen throws me down onto the bed and I give him a sinister smile as I run the tip of my tongue across the blood gathered beneath the nail of my index finger. Sparks ignite in his eyes as he climbs on top of me. He’s all predator, stalking up my body, his gaze soldered to mine and his expression ravenous. He hovers over me and my smile grows wider, darker. I lay my finger on my tongue and wrap my lips around it, sucking the last of his blood from my skin. He watches for a moment, transfixed.

And then he descends.

Ashen bites my neck where it connects with my shoulder, clamping down hard. I let out a squeak but I want more, I want it harder. I clutch his hair and keep his mouth on my skin as his bruising grip covers my thighs in fingerprints that will heal far too quickly.

The Reaper releases my neck to press a line of searing kisses down the center of my chest and onto the soft skin of one breast as he palms the other. He draws my nipple into his mouth, swirling his tongue around the hardened peak as he pinches the other between his fingers. I writhe and he pins me with his free hand, pressing down hard on my stomach. His leg traps one of my thighs. My other curls across his back like a vice. I keep squirming until he bites down and pulls, scraping my skin when he lets go.

I hiss and release my leg from across Ashen’s body and aim to knee him in the head. He catches my thigh. I glare at him and a wicked grin flashes across his face. I want to eat him alive for it.

“Now, now, vampire,” he purrs, pushing my leg down so it exposes the seam of my body. “Play nice.”

Fuck nice. I want to play dirty.

I grab Ashen’s nape and pull his lips to mine. I rake my nails down his spine to feel him shiver beneath my touch. I break our kiss to suck on the skin of his throat, teasing him with the threat of my fangs. I drag them across his neck until they slice his skin and blood drips into my mouth.

Ashen pulls away and gives me a dark, dangerous laugh as he pushes my shoulders into the mattress. He sits back on his heels and burns me with a sinful smile.

“I said,” he growls, hooking a hand behind one of my knees and then the other, “play nice.”

In a swift and seamless motion, Ashen spreads my thighs apart in his grasp and lifts me to his mouth. He feasts on my flesh. He sucks and licks and kisses and devours. He growls and sends vibrations into my core. He pushes my legs open further and bruises my skin with his grip.

“You have the sweetest taste,” he says when he breaks away to press kisses across the inside of my thigh. He lays one of my legs over his shoulder and pushes a finger between my folds, then another, working them in a slow but powerful motion, hooking them with every stroke like he’s beckoning me to come closer. I moan as my nerves catch fire with his touch. He kisses his way back to my center. “I love to hear the sounds you make, vampire. Almost as much love your delicious, perfect little pussy,” he says before his mouth descends to feast on my flesh.

He continues his ministrations, slowing whenever he feels me tighten around his fingers, sucking and biting to hear me moan. I make nearly every sound except a word. Ashen takes me right to the edge and then denies me, time after time until I smash my fist against the bed and growl with frustration. He has the audacity to laugh right into my pussy and it drives me nearly mad with desire. But he does what I want, what I need. He pumps his fingers and rolls his tongue over my clit until I come in a blinding, star-filled orgasm, grinding against his face.

My breath is still coursing past the residual burn of my throat in rapid inhalations when Ashen climbs my body with kisses and bites. He presses his lips to mine and I taste my arousal on his tongue. As the kiss deepens, I feel the silken tip of his erection press to my folds. But he waits. He waits for my invitation. And for a long moment, I deny him. He doesn’t grow impatient. He takes the time to explore my body. My mouth with his tongue. My flesh with his hands. He maps every muscle and ridge of bone that he can until I’m ready to let him in.

And when I do, it doesn’t slake the need I have for him. He fills me with his length and I only want more. My flesh stretches around his girth with each stroke and I can’t get enough. Every thrust brings a starburst explosion of pleasure but there’s still a galaxy to explore. Ashen breaks our kiss and frames my face with his hands as he pushes deeper into me. “Ni mina titaan ina zae darisam,” he whispers, a quiet and gentle confession. I want to live in this heaven within you forever.

But I don’t want confessions that pull taut the wire wrapped around my heart. I don’t want words that sound like love. I want truth. And the only true thing right now is what I feel in my flesh and breath and bones.

I hook my leg across Ashen’s back and flip us over in a swift motion without ever breaking our connection. I push his chest down with my palms and dig my nails into his skin, watching with predatory interest as he closes his eyes and absorbs both pleasure and pain.

I spread my legs wider and roll my hips, taking him as deep as he’ll go, working his erection as he palms my breasts. My arousal colors the air with its scent. Sweat slicks the muscles beneath my hands. I chase my orgasm to a cliff edge and dive into the abyss, every muscle tightening and my back arching as I dig my nails deeper into Ashen’s skin. My core compresses around his erection and my pleasure detonates like a bomb.

When the waves of the orgasm subside, I pause to open my eyes and look down at Ashen, my chest heaving with deep breaths as he sweeps locks of hair back from my shoulder. I feel him pulse within me but he still hasn’t come. He’s watching me not with fire, but with longing. Something dark and distant that I’ve pulled from his depths.

I close my eyes, shutting him away. I roll my hips slowly and lean over him, bracing my hands above his shoulders by the pillow. The smell of blood drifts from the marks of my fingernails and I lean down to kiss one of the crimson crescent moons.

I open my eyes and look down at my hands, my fingers as tense as tiger claws. I may be still changing, becoming something new. I may yet need to evolve.

But one thing I will always be is a vampire. The original vampire.

And there is one thing about a vampire that you should never forget.

We adapt to what you need us to be in that moment, so that we can get exactly what we want from you.

I halt my motion. My breath slows. I quiet everything, even my heart.

I lean closer, blowing a thin stream of breath across Ashen’s skin. My lips graze his ear and I rake my fangs across the lobe. He shivers, his hands pressing into my back and flowing down the ridges of my ribs. He twitches within me, growing ever closer to an orgasm.

I roll my hips once in a teasing motion and stop again. He growls with both pleasure and frustration.

“Tell me, Reaper,” I say in his ear, my voice low and husky. It doesn’t sound like mine. It brings me both delight and rage. “How does it feel to be denied that which you thought you had earned?”

Ashen gives a dark huff of a laugh at my goading words and grasps my hips. I roll them once more and he moans.

It happens so fast that his hands never even leave my sides.

Hot blood cascades from his neck, spraying across my chest. I lean back to stare down at his face with a faint, menacing smile. I hold my faithful kaiken in my palm and smell the silver-infused steel, the leather of the handle warming beneath my touch.

Ashen’s erection is still hard within me as I slip away. He gurgles a shuddering breath and his lips move. He tries to say something. I think it’s my name, but no sound comes out.

I lean down and run my tongue along the slice in his throat, coating it in his effervescent taste. And then I press my lips to his, swirling his blood into his mouth before sitting back to survey my work.

“I always thought betrayal tasted like copper. Tell me if I’m right when you get back from the other side.”

His eyes flash with a mix of hurt and rage, and everything else he feels that I don’t want to know. With another quick slash across his throat, I end his life with my blade.

I climb off the bed and wipe my kaiken clean on his leg before it dissolves into cinders and ash. I watch until the last gray flake drifts into the still air, until all that’s left is the bloodstain on the sheets.

When he’s gone, I turn a circle in the silent room, looking for towels or robes or clothes. I see my bag on a chair along the opposite wall.

I take three steps into the room.

I stop.

Something’s not right.

As quick as a snap of fingers, I fall into shadow, losing my mind to a vision of the night.