Chapter 10

Ten

After a disastrous morningof not being able to do a single thing with the miasma, and not singing well at all, Ara turned me loose. I went hunting for Theon, as I had business/financial questions to ask. How did loans work in this world? Banks? Could we even get a loan and what could I use for collateral? If I had to earn all the money I needed in order to launch a business, this would take much longer. I’d rather skip that step if I could.

Turned out Theon was in his office, apparently a regular occurrence at this time of day. When I strode in, he looked buried in paperwork. I usually saw him in a coat, vest, tie all neatly done, black hair in a ponytail over one shoulder. That was not today’s Theon. Today, he had lost the tie, the coat, and his hair tie was threatening to escape altogether. He looked stressed, to sum it up in a word. Also ready to set the paperwork on fire. Ah, one of those days, eh? I sympathized.

Still, while he looked like a mess, he was definitely a hot mess. I appreciated very much that my new world came with such excellent eye candy.

I came all the way to the desk before he realized I was there, which said something about his state of mind. I couldn’t sneak up on Ara if my life depended on it. Fae hearing was better than a dog’s.

“Rough day?” I asked him.

“Taxes are due this week,” he grunted back.

Oh, it was tax season. This poor man. “Taxes are the absolute worst.”

Something like interest kindled in his golden eyes as he looked up at me. “They are. Your world has taxes?”

“Oh, we have taxes. We also had wars over taxes. Boston Tea Party. It was a whole thing. Can I help?”

“Unfortunately, no. My accountant has all the numbers and reports in order for me, but I have to finish these forms and sign them myself.” He groaned and leaned back, working his neck from side to side. “I’m almost done, but…”

“Your brain’s trying to leak out of your ears?”

“That’s a very accurate summary. Did you need something, Jake?”

“Ah, well, I had a few questions about banks and loans and how they work?”

He regarded me steadily for a long moment, like he could see right through me. “I can explain that to you, sure, but I’d rather ask more questions about you.”

I shouldn’t have felt immediately flattered by that. It was really hard not to be because Theon was one of those people who genuinely talked to you. Man practically oozed sincerity, and coming from a life where everyone wore masks and fake smiles? Priceless.

“Can we walk and talk?” I asked because I felt he really needed a break from that desk. “I have yet to see the full castle.”

“Then I’ll give you a tour while we talk.” Theon escaped the chair with alacrity, coming around the desk with enough speed his hip almost clipped the edge.

See? He totally needed an escape. Walls might be closing in on him now. I was happy to provide him a break.

Since we were asking questions, I had one I’d been dying to ask him. “What did you think of me, when I first landed?”

Theon shot me a droll look as he opened the door, escorting me out. “Well, first impression was a very bold intruder had snuck into my bed for some nefarious purpose. Truth be told, I almost stabbed you before I realized you didn’t look quite right.”

“My clothes, you mean?”

“Well, that, and you had a scent clinging to you that made no sense to me. Something thick, hot smelling.”

“Could be gasoline? Asphalt? I was hit on a road right before coming here.”

“Maybe that was it. I’ve never smelled either of those things.”

“Well, far as I can tell, they don’t exist here, either.”

Theon paused in the doorway, looking about. “Where have you been?”

“Basically main areas. Dining room, kitchen, bedrooms.”

“Then training yard,” Theon said firmly. “I must introduce you to all the knights.”

As in, knight in shining armor? That kind of knight? Well, this should be fun. I’d always liked medieval knights. We escaped the study and evil taxes back into a hallway I was coming to know well. It was, in fact, the only hallway in this whole castle that had any kind of artwork or carpet. Then again, this was the area of the castle that the outside world normally saw, so it made sense it looked nicer. Or would have, if the carpets hadn’t been threadbare and faded from wear and time.

“What is your world like?” Theon asked.

I followed him down the main hallway and wondered how to answer in three hundred words or less. Felt like I was back in college doing one of those verbal essays. “Well, highly populated, for one. Earth doesn’t have magic, it has technology and science. So, for instance, those warming sigils you have to keep the snow off the roof? We don’t have those.”

Theon let out a soft huh. “That door is the shortcut for the main garden, by the way, but don’t use it in winter. It sticks awfully and requires brute force to try and wrestle it back. So how do you clear the snow off the roof?”

“Manual labor. Someone gets up there with a shovel.” I shrugged, as it was the truth. “From what I can tell, Earth’s machines and the magic here on this world are about the same in terms of accessibility. The more wealthy and educated you are, the more access you have to it.”

“You’re not wrong.” Theon’s mouth went flat, his expression something like a mix of anger and resignation. “I wish I could say otherwise. Few humans are born with any magic; it seems to be reserved mostly for the Fae and the Dwarves. The humans who do have magic tend to have divine power, like yourself.”

“Interesting. I wonder why?”

“No one knows. There doesn’t seem to be any rhyme or reason to it, either.” He looked wistful for a moment. “If I’d had more than myself and my cousin here to use magic, we might have been able to fix more problems. Alas, Ara was the only one crazy enough to come live in Rehobath. I’ve been able to do some good in the duchy, but not as much as I’d hoped. I felt like I was losing a battle of attrition. At least until you came.”

I batted my eyes up at him playfully. “Wish granted.”

His golden eyes turned warm. “Yes, so you are.”

Okay, I’d been joking, but when he responded like that? It made me blush and feel all gooey on the inside. Theon, don’t do this. I’m a very weak man. I will absolutely try to seduce you if you don’t tone it down.

Change of subject, change of subject—ah! “When you’re not working, what do you do?”

“Different work.” Theon pulled a face, still talking easily as he opened the door to the outside training yard. “I used to paint, but I simply don’t have the energy or time anymore.”

Now that was sad. He was totally in survival mode right now, wasn’t he? “What kind of painting? Oils, acrylics, watercolors?”

You’d think I’d asked him the golden question from the way he lit up. “Acrylics and watercolors are my favorites. You paint?”

“I mean, I’m not an expert, but I dabble sometimes. Usually watercolors. I’m one of those artists who has to sit and do the painting all in one shot, otherwise I get distracted by a shiny, and I never come back to finish it.”

“I do know what you mean. Oils take too long for me. They don’t dry as fast as I want them to.”

“Exactly.” Okay, me, new goal. Get this place to the point Theon no longer lived in survival mode. Because living without art, that was just sad.

The training yard was not quiet, to say the least, with people going at each other with weapons. The sparring was intense. I once again saw a diverse group of people of all different sizes, races, and skin tones.

“Reyes,” Theon greeted.

A slender, petite woman turned, and since she was half Theon’s height, had to crane her neck back. She was in full leather armor and chain mail, with a wicked hooked nose and golden eyes that dominated her face. At a guess, I would say Goblin? The green skin tone and bright white hair really said Goblin to me.

“Your Grace,” she greeted with a polite bow. “Get the taxes done yet?”

“Working on it.” He sighed. “I took a break to show Jake around. Jake, this is Reyes, vice-captain of the squad.”

I clasped arms with her. “Hello, Vice-Captain.”

“Hello,” she said, regarding me curiously. “I’ve heard of our esteemed guest. It’s nice to meet you.”

“And you.” I looked around in admiration at the people banging away at each other. “They’re working really hard.”

“We take security very seriously up here.” Reyes canted her head. “Speaking of, you got any experience with fighting, Master Jake?”

“Uh.” I doubted fighting with my siblings counted. “I have a little experience with archery and hand-to-hand combat.”

“Well, that’s better than nothing.” Reyes hastened to reassure me, “Whenever you go out, of course we’ll come with you, but I think we’d all rest better if you could defend yourself, too.”

I now lived in a world where safety wasn’t taken for granted. I’d best remember that. “I’m all for it.”

Coin piped up from my pocket. “Ooh, ooh! I have an idea?—”

“No one cares.” I smacked it.

“Ouch!”

“Oh, stop whining, it’s not like you have nerves to feel anything with.”

“I have feelings, don’t I?” Coin audibly pouted.

I stoutly ignored it. There was no sympathy to be found for the likes of Coin. “Sorry about that, Vice-Captain. Coin’s a talkative bitch despite not having a mouth.”

“I can hear you, y’know.”

I ignored that too. “Uh, I have no idea what the bows on this world look like? I’m used to a compound bow.”

I got two blank stares.

“A what?” Reyes pointed to bows hanging on the wall nearby. “Like those?”

“Uh, those look like short bows to me. Something you’d use while mounted, right?”

Theon nodded in approval. “That’s exactly what those are for. You do know something of archery.”

I threw up both hands to stave off this impression. “No, no. Do not give me skills I don’t have. I haven’t picked up a bow in over six years. I’m not just rusty, I’ve likely forgotten everything except the essential of don’t aim at your foot.”

Reyes busted up laughing, for some reason. “That’s a good first rule!”

At least I amused someone.

“Bodyguard first,” Theon told Reyes. “Then I think some archery lessons to start with.”

“For sure. I was thinking Luk.”

“Just Luk?”

“Thigad too for different shifts.”

Theon seemed pleased by her selection. “Size alone scares most people off with those two. Good choices, Reyes.”

“Those two practically fell over themselves volunteering, so thank them, not me.”

I had no idea what they were talking about. Bodyguard? Theon had mentioned this yesterday, but did I really need one if I was just bumming around the castle and town?

“I’ll fetch ’em.” Reyes took off at a trot.

“Will I really need a bodyguard around the clock?”

“They won’t be with you all the time,” Theon said. “But if you’re not with me or Ara, I’d prefer you keep them nearby. There’s many dangers here, and with you coming in from another world, you won’t know what they even are.”

Man made a fair point there.

“Also, this way you have someone to vouch for you if your identity comes into question. I don’t envision that problem while you’re on my lands, but just in case.”

Also a good point. It wasn’t like I had a driver’s license or something to prove who I was. “I’m telling you right now, I’m not arguing about the bodyguards. Okay? I’m just not used to the idea of having one.”

“I’d like to say they’ll be discreet, but—” Theon inclined his head to indicate something over my shoulder.

I turned around and holy bejeezus what did their mothers feed these two? Whole ostrich eggs? It was like two walking boulders came bounding up to me with all the energy of overgrown puppies. I had this sudden, powerful wish for treats in my pockets to prove to these two I was a friend.

Both stopped, grinning, which revealed some rather interesting fangs and wow, drinking with a mouth like that must be interesting. I wasn’t sure if they were really tan after being outdoors all day or what, but their skin was an interesting shade of brown. Like polished walnut.

“Jake”—Theon’s hand was on my shoulder, a reassuring touch—“this is Thigad and his brother, Luk.”

Brothers made sense to me, as they were both massive and had a similar look. They had to be Orcs or something.

I mustered up manners from somewhere and gave them a greeting. “Hello. I understand you two will be my bodyguards?”

“Yes, sir, Master Jake,” Thigad rumbled, and despite the serious look on his face, I got the impression he was bouncing around on the inside. “We volunteered. Heard you were willing to go into the miasma itself to clear it, if you had to. We want to go in with you when you do.”

Well, that was forthright enough. “Understood. I’ll make sure that happens. Uh. Say something does attack, what do you want me to do?”

All three men looked at each other, then looked at me, like they’d not expected the question but really should have.

“I think a little training is in order,” Theon announced. “Jake doesn’t have any idea of how to behave if a threat approaches. It cancels out the benefits of having a bodyguard to begin with.”

Glad he saw my point. “I’m all for it. Oh, and can one of you teach me how to use a bow? Yours are different than the ones I’m used to.”

Theon waved this away. “I’ll teach you archery.”

Could this be a hands-on lesson? I really preferred hands-on lessons when my instructor was this handsome.

“Archery a different day.” Theon put hands on both my shoulders—yippee!—and turned me toward the back of the training yard. “We’re going to work on how to duck first.”

Thigad eyed me up and down, measuring with his eyes. “I think you’re light enough to throw.”

Uh. Say what now?

“We should try that,” Luk said. Then he cupped a hand around his mouth to bellow, “MINA!”

A female knight from the other side of the training yard bellowed back, “WHAT?”

“COME HERE! WE GOT TO TRAIN MASTER JAKE!”

I got the feeling this was going to be a very long, dusty, and possibly painful afternoon. Hopefully they didn’t break fragile ol’ me. I hadn’t yet tested if I could heal myself with divine powers.

Theon would stop them if they got too rambunctious. Hopefully.