Chapter 24

Chapter 24

Being short meant that Eleanor usually found herself in situations better suited for taller people. For example, tables and chairs were always a little higher than was suitable, and she could never look over anyone's shoulder. Despite this, she enjoyed her height. Unfortunately, developing a rather large bust and hips had minimized the number of small spaces she could fit into, but she still enjoyed her height for the most part.

"Having fun?" Julia asked with amusement. "You've been happily kicking your feet back and forth on that chair for a while now."

"It's the little joys that make life worth living," said Eleanor. "Especially when my aunt is doing everything possible to make me miserable."

Julia sighed. "How terrible it must be for you," she said. "I didn't know your aunt could become this overbearing and terrible person. She is usually quite jolly."

"I suppose something snapped within her," Eleanor replied. "Or she was hiding her true self all along. I cannot tell. All I know is that I am unhappy and need to escape this hell."

Aunt Helen had taken to controlling every aspect of Eleanor's life, from what she did during the day to what she wore. Eleanor couldn't do anything without her aunt's approval. It was constricting.

"I wish I could do something to help you," she said. "I could speak to my parents and have them speak to your aunt. Perhaps they will help her see reason."

"I doubt it," said Eleanor. "The Aunt Helen I knew has disappeared. She is the stepmother you read about in faerie tales. Only, she is my aunt, and we're related by blood. That somehow makes the situation worse."

"I'm so sorry, Elli," said Julia, briefly resting her head on Eleanor's shoulder.

Eleanor smiled. "You haven't used that nickname in some time. You must truly feel bad for me."

"I just wish we could return to our childhood when everything was easier," her friend told her. "I feel terrible knowing you're suffering like this. You cannot even choose your own clothing anymore. That is just too much."

That bit had surprised Eleanor. The very next day, after their argument became the first of many changes to come, her aunt sent a maid to her room to inform her that her attire needed to be approved by her aunt. She could no longer dress as she wished. Aunt Helen never had a problem with Eleanor's style before, so she could only imagine that her aunt wanted to be petty. At least she had allowed Julia to accompany Eleanor to the modiste, but that privilege was slightly eclipsed by the list she had to give the seamstress. Eleanor could no longer decide on her dresses' color, style, fit, and accessories. Everything was controlled by her aunt.

"Will this color do?" the seamstress asked, bringing a fabric swatch. "Your aunt asked for palest blue, but I seem short of that hue. I have this grayish blue instead."

"It's pale and blue—it should be fine," said Eleanor. "What about the other colors?"

Her aunt didn't want Eleanor to wear bright colors anymore because it made her stand out too much. It was odd because she didn't wear bright colors all that much. Most bright-colored clothing was Aunt Helen's decision, not Eleanor's.

"I have the other colors, but the lilac in the silk will only come later this week," the seamstress revealed. "In the meantime, I will begin the others. Are you happy with your choices, Miss Huxley?" she asked, turning to Julia.

"Yes, I am," Julia replied. "I love the patterns I selected for my day dresses, but as for accessories for the gowns, I'll leave that to you. I trust your judgment."

The seamstress smiled. "I am glad to hear that. Please return for your first dress fittings in two weeks."

"Thank you," Eleanor said, sliding off the chair to her feet. "We will return then."

She linked arms with Julia and left the shop. Her aunt wanted her to return home immediately after going to the modiste, but she didn't want to return home yet. It no longer felt like home, anyway.

"I heard there is a hidden but well-known tea place somewhere here," said Eleanor. "I think it's above the bakery. Shall we ask about it?"

"Are you certain you will not cause unnecessary problems with your aunt?" Julia asked. "She already has you on a tight leash. You wouldn't want it to grow tighter."

"I'll just tell her a few gentlemen stopped us," said Eleanor. "That should make her happy. She wants me to throw myself at young gentlemen."

It was one gentleman in particular, but Eleanor wouldn't get into specifics. She would just tell her aunt what she wanted to hear. Eleanor didn't like lying, but she was cornered and could barely breathe.

"As long as you do not get into trouble," said Julia. "We can ask the bakery if they have a room for refreshments. I think they have an upstairs section, so it's probably there."

"I think so, too," Eleanor agreed.

They waited for a carriage to pass, nodding at the driver, who lifted his hat in greeting before they crossed the road. The bakery was just a few feet away, so they didn't have to walk far. After briefly speaking with the bakery owner, they were led into an upstairs room where several other people were enjoying tea and various baked goods.

"Mmm, I see currant buns," said Julia. "I hope they serve them with butter and jam."

They sat near the window overlooking the garden behind the bakery. Judging by the front of the shop, one wouldn't think that such a pretty area existed.

"I see why this little tea shop is popular," said Eleanor. "It's not a common thing, and it's a lovely setting. I wonder if what they offer is just as good. It should be since there's a bakery downstairs."

They were given a list of available cakes and teas, including some unfamiliar ones.

"My goodness," Julia exclaimed. "A cheesecake in a pound cake? It sounds odd but delicious. Shall we try it together?"

Eleanor nodded. "I'm willing if you are. Fortunately, Aunt Helen isn't aware that I have saved much of my pin money and have hidden it away, so I can afford to do things like this. She's trying to steal all the pleasure out of my life, but I won't let her. I think we should just splurge today as a show of defiance. Get anything you want. In fact, let's try everything we've never had before."

"That's not necessary, Eli," said Julia. "We shouldn't waste your money."

"It's just money," Eleanor countered.

"Money that you need," said Julia. "You're no longer getting pin money, and they've withheld your inheritance. They may not be able to force you to get married because you're of age, but they might corner you until you have no choice."

Eleanor knew all this—Aunt Helen had not hidden her intentions. The way she saw it, she had four options: run away and throw herself on her relatives' mercy and hope they take her in, marry Lord Langston and live miserably, marry the duke and be ostracized from her brother and aunt, or become an impoverished spinster. The last option seemed best because Eleanor was intelligent and could use her knowledge to make money. She could become a governess, use her writing skills and write under a gentleman's name, or help women choose the right colors and styles to complement their appearance. She heard somewhere that more women were seeking expert advice to look better.

"They can try their best to force me, but I will not capitulate," Eleanor replied firmly. "I cannot believe they want me to marry someone like Lord Langston. You know how terrible he is. I cannot understand why he has latched onto me. He has many other women who want to marry him. Why me? Why now? What changed?"

"I do not know," said Julia. "I wish I did, but I do not. I haven't heard anything about his intentions. But what about the duke? Why not marry him?"

Eleanor's belly fluttered slightly. "I have thought about it, but I do not know his true feelings yet. How can I expect marriage?"

Julia's lips pursed. "You are not blind," she said. "You know he is sincerely interested in you. Everyone can see it."

"But he hasn't confessed his feelings, has he?" Eleanor pointed out. "What if he still cannot move ahead because of his late wife? He loved her and some men simply cannot let go of the past. I will be second to no one."

She may like the duke and couldn't deny their undeniable spark, but she had to look after her heart. When Eleanor was with him, she felt she could defy everyone to be with him. However, once they parted ways, all her doubts crept back in, making her question if she truly had a future with him. It was maddening going back and forth like that, but this was her future. She couldn't take it lightly.

"I didn't get that feeling from him," said Julia.

"What feeling?"

"Being stuck in the past."

Eleanor sighed. "You didn't speak with him," she said. "I do not expect him to forget about his wife, but I sense he has difficulty thinking about marrying another. He may like me, but is he willing to come against my family to marry me? I just do not know."

Julia also sighed. "Oh, what a bother," she complained. "The one thing I am certain of is that Lord Langston isn't good for you. The duke seems the better choice, but your family disapproves. Are they not at all moved by the fact that you'll be the Duchess of Devonshire?"

"The duchess?" Eleanor asked. She paled slightly. "I forgot about that."

In all her thoughts about the duke, she hadn't connected the two facts that he was a duke, and if she married him, she would become a duchess. It was so easy to focus on Nathaniel as just a man and not the title he carried. It was quite a weighty thing to marry a duke.

Julia laughed. "Only you would forget such a thing," she said. "It's all that other women can think about. This is the very reason you are better suited for the position. You will not allow it to go to your head."

"Perhaps," said Eleanor.

"Just imagine the position you would hold in society," Julia pointed out excitedly. "There is nothing higher than a duchess outside of the royal family. People may have spoken badly of you in the past, but they'll seek your approval once you're a duchess. Those who thought nothing of ridiculing you would be too afraid of upsetting you. The duke is also extremely wealthy, which would also make you wealthy. If you ask me, there are more reasons to marry the duke than not."

Eleanor mulled over her friend's words while their tea and cakes were arranged on the table. Everything Julia said was true, but none of it mattered if Nathaniel did not love her or at least have strong affection for her. It was torturous not knowing where she stood with him. Perhaps she should speak to him and reveal her feelings. She had nothing to lose. If indeed he wished to marry her, it would take time for her brother and aunt to grow accustomed to the union. Eleanor didn't deny that holding such a high social status would have people trying to please her, which would solve the very thing her aunt had a problem with—getting invited by women her age. Everyone would want a duchess as a friend. She would hold the power over them.

"Oh goodness!" Julia cried. "This is delicious. Why did no one think of putting cheesecake and pound cake together before? It's a perfect match. Try it, Eli."

Eleanor smiled. "You keep using that name," she pointed out. She took a bite of the cake and widened her eyes. "Yes, this is divine. I must tell the kitchen at home."

She took another bite, closing her eyes in ecstasy. Her shoulders started moving, and her toes wiggled in her shoes. Food always made her happy and more optimistic.

"I know something is good when you dance with your shoulders," said Julia, laughing. "It's rather adorable."

Eleanor chuckled. "Good food makes me feel like I can take over the world and spread peace," she said. "I also feel a little daring."

"Daring?" Julia repeated. "Is coming here against your aunt's wishes not daring enough?"

"She didn't say I couldn't come here," said Eleanor. "She merely said I was to go home after seeing the seamstress."

"It's the same thing," Julia insisted.

Eleanor shrugged. "Perhaps. However, this isn't daring enough. I think I should speak to Nathaniel. He might be too shy to say anything, so I should help him along."

"Nathaniel?" asked Julia.

"The duke."

Julia's eyes widened. "You call him Nathaniel?"

Eleanor nodded. "And he calls me Eleanor, but only when we're somewhat alone. I initiated it, so perhaps I need to initiate revealing our true feelings."

"My, you certainly move quickly," her friend remarked. "But I support you. Frankly, I'm proud of you. You're not allowing this injustice to drag you down."

Eleanor smiled. "I hope the resolve lasts. Perhaps I should commemorate this moment by returning to the modiste and changing one of the dresses to suit my tastes."

Julia gasped slightly. "You would do that?"

"I certainly would," said Eleanor. "My aunt can do nothing about it once it's made. So, eat up—we have changes to make."

They fell silent and finished their cheesecake slices around the same time. The steamed blueberry pudding was just as delicious, especially with the whipped cream. Another cake had a cream and jelly layer, but the jelly wasn't one Eleanor was accustomed to. It was creamier but still wobbled like jelly.

"Whoever made this is creative," she said. "Oh, I nearly forgot to ask you about something."

Julia raised her eyebrows slightly. "Yes?"

"What is the story concerning you, my brother, and Lord Richard?" Eleanor asked. "You haven't said anything about either of them since we returned to London."

Julia's cheeks turned pink almost instantly. "Oh, that," she said. "I have not said anything because I didn't want to add to your troubles."

"Your situation is troublesome?"

"Two men and one woman is troublesome," said Julia. "However, I did make my decision a while ago. I informed Lord Richard that while I found him a delightful man, my heart belonged elsewhere."

"Goodness!" Eleanor exclaimed. "Do you mean to tell me you've chosen my brother? But he hasn't said a word about it."

"I asked him not to trouble you," Julia explained. "You already have so much on your shoulders."

"I can never be too busy or troubled for you," said Eleanor. "Tell me, what did Grant say? Did you speak to him?"

"He spoke to me and revealed his feelings," Julia revealed shyly. "I accepted them. I think he'll propose soon."

Eleanor was saddened that her brother hadn't bothered to reveal any of this to her. They used to be close, but now all he was worried about was forcing her into an unwanted marriage.

"I'm happy for you," she said. "I hope his proposal will be a grand gesture. You deserve only the best."

Julia smiled. "Thank you. Perhaps I can speak to him on your behalf. He might listen to me regarding Lord Langston. Your brother is a romantic at heart—I can attest to this. I cannot understand why he would force a marriage when he believes in true love."

"That is because love only seems to apply to him," Eleanor said bitterly. "He cannot see past his nose. I am glad that he is so good to you. Never allow him to take advantage of your love. You heard what your mother said—he is to love you, and you are to respect him. If he cannot fulfill his duties, he is not worthy to be called a husband."

"I'm sure he will be a good husband," Julia told her. "I also believe he is a good brother. He simply needs to step out of his beliefs and look at the situation objectively. I'll do my best to help him."

Eleanor nodded, but she wasn't confident her brother would change. Grant and Aunt Helen wanted to take away her freedom, which was the worst thing one could do to her. Eleanor couldn't let them succeed.