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Chapter 31

CHAPTER 31

We move together as though our bodies were built for this singular act. I know his movements, his points of passion, as well as my own. We tumble—him on top, me on top, on our sides, him behind me—until I am dizzy and breathless. His hips slap against mine with such force that it's almost as if he's trying to compete with my cries of passion. Evander grabs for me as if I am his only lifeline—the tether to his entire existence.

We are shameless and needy. He takes me like I am the last woman on earth and he is the last man. Like his one goal is to consume me.

Evander bites my neck where it meets my shoulder, growling, pinning me down by my wrists as he furiously pounds into me. I allow each thrust of his hips to push a thought out of my mind. There is nothing left but blurred visions, his low moans and rasping breath.

Never have I been with someone like I am with him now. I have never felt so…animalistic. Every shred of decency is gone and I do not feel the least bit ashamed. I feel free. This passion fills me, lifts me. It allows me to let go of everything else and savor this one moment. To be a primal and sensual being.

The climax comes swift and fast, rolling over me as I shudder with a cry. Evander slows, kissing me through it, before he finds his pace again. And again…and again.

Finally, when we are sweaty, breathless, and spent, he collapses next to me. Neither of us says anything. But when he stretches out an arm, I know just what to do. I shift closer to him, using his bicep like a pillow, leaning slightly and continuing to look up at the sky above.

"Thank you," I whisper.

"I should be thanking you." He twists to plant a kiss on my forehead. It is so tender compared to the beast that just ravaged my body. Two sides of this man—gentle and ferocious. I love both. "That was…the best I've ever had."

I sit and slap his shoulder playfully. "Oh stop, now you're just trying to butter me up to get me to go again."

He smirks. "Is it working?"

Laughing, I stand, and my legs wobble, which only causes me to laugh more. Evander sits quickly and I wave him away with a grin. "I'm fine. But that thing you did with your tongue…it has my knees a bit weak, still."

"So do that first, that way you have the most time on your back to recover. Noted."

I laugh harder. "You are insatiable."

"Only for you." There's a faint dusting of heat still on his cheeks, accented by an easy, satisfied smile. I pause, taking a moment to admire him in the moonlight.

"Contentment suits you, Evander," I say softly.

"Glad you think so, for I so often find myself content when you are near." He stretches. The sentiment fills me with a gentle warmth. "But is everything well?"

"More than well. I have a strong desire to rinse off after that and saw a stream not too far away earlier."

"Are you saying I'm dirty?" Evander arches a brow.

"I'm saying the things you did to me were." I grin to convey I am not upset by it in the slightest.

"I can't argue with that. Hurry back." He yawns and lies back down onto the blanket we've stretched out. A blanket that I think we'll have to leave behind instead of bringing to Den. It smells too much of our sex. "I sleep better when you're here."

"Then I'll be sure not to delay."

My feet are light, even if my knees are a bit wobbly. That was what I had needed. A satisfying culmination of our trip away and a reaffirmation of everything I've been suspecting. Speaking with bodies, rather than words, to convey the depth of our feelings for each other.

The stream is only a few minutes' walk. I hesitate for a second before stepping in, thinking of Volst, overcome by the uncomfortable sensation of washing myself in the home of a spirit. But then I think of all the people and animals who do that, and much worse, in the rivers, lakes, and streams he presides over, and…

I cringe and stop worrying.

The water is icy and clears my head. It quenches the fires of desire and allows me to focus with a level mind, replaying everything to see if it truly was how I remember…or if I'm imprinting meaning that isn't there from the heat of the moment. Every motion, every time his hand was behind my head to ease it down to the ground. The moments he hesitated out of worry he'd been too rough, pausing to check on me.

"He loves me." The thought is as clear as the moonlit water. A surge of elation nearly has me soaring to the heavens.

Only to bring me crashing down when a rough voice says, "Yes, you certainly seemed to enjoy yourselves."

Winter itself sweeps through me, coating my bones in frost. The urge to drop into the water and curl up into a ball of horror and shame is nearly overwhelming. I am naked and alone and the man's voice is that of a predator.

But I don't cower. I'm not going to give Bardulf, of all people, the satisfaction of my fear or the power that comes from my shame. My danger doesn't truly lessen if I bend before him.

I slowly turn to face the source of the voice, confirming what I already knew from the sound alone. Bardulf stands off the side of the creek, leaning against a tree like Evander had when I communed with Volst. But unlike Evander, who radiated warmth and approval, Bardulf is danger. Disgust competes with hatred as it fills me.

This man will hurt me. He has already so casually violated my privacy. Even if the lykin have different notions of modesty…there's something in his aura that feels as if he wants me to be uncomfortable. It is a gut instinct of danger that I would be a fool not to listen to.

Even though my muscles are trembling with every step, I work to keep myself calm and composed as I emerge from the stream. I must play nicely to get back to Evander.

"There is nothing quite like a dip in a cool creek." Why didn't I bring my clothes? I groan internally. Oh, because I didn't think I was going to run into one of my least favorite people in the entire world as naked as the day I was born.

"You enjoyed a lot more than that." He pushes off the tree, walking quickly. I try to pick up my pace as well. He steps in front of my path. I halt to avoid walking into him. The only thing I want less than Bardulf seeing me naked is my bare skin touching his. "What do you think Conri will say when I tell him that his prized bitch is rutting with his knight and looking like she's enjoying it a whole lot? The same bitch that has refused to lie with him. Even better, that she thinks that cur knight loves her. Is that true? Does that bastard love you?" Bardulf leans forward, looming over me.

"Let me pass." I bite out the words.

"You think you can order me? No, no, you are mine now. If you don't want Conri to find out what you've done then you'll do exactly as I say." A thin, sinister smirk slithers across his lips, arcing with the sharpness of a sickle.

"Go ahead and tell him." I use Bardulf's moment of surprise to step around him, trying to exude more confidence and nonchalance than I feel. I know how bad this is. But I can't tackle it alone. I must get back to Evander. "Tell Conri whatever pleases you to say. We'll see if he's inclined to believe you when I'm the one that shares his bed and has his ear in a way you never could."

Bardulf lets out a growl. A fist closes around the back of my neck. I gasp, cut short by the press of his too-large fingers, which wrap around the front of my throat with a crushing grip. He pulls me back and draws near. I stumble but keep my feet, hands going to my throat, trying to dig underneath his grip.

"You will spend every day of the rest of your short life regretting challenging me," he snarls. "I'll give you one more chance. Tell me you'll be my good girl and maybe I can overlook this."

"Let me go." I can't tell if the words are soft and raspy from the grip he has on me, or the rage I feel.

"Or what?"

"You saw what I can do in the last encampment. I'll have the earth open and swallow you whole."

It's an empty threat—Brundil's magic is still too weak for me to ask anything more of her. But Bardulf clearly doesn't understand that component of spirit magic, because his grip slackens some. That's right , I want to say, you lykin aren't the only ones with teeth. Then, his hand tenses again, firmer than before. I can feel my heart throbbing against the pads of his fingers. Pain blossoms behind my eyes.

"You wouldn't dare hurt one of Conri's knights."

"Try me."

He doesn't move and neither do I. We both take two breaths, seeing who will snap first. He has me by the throat, literally and metaphorically. But he thinks I have powers he can only dream of. Though, if he changes into his wolf shape, he's faster and stronger than any spirit I could think to summon. Do I keep trying to talk down the situation or do I try and make the first strike?

Bardulf grunts, frustrations boiling over. I open my mouth to speak. But neither of us gets to make whatever move we've been planning.

Out of nowhere, a blur of shadow crashes into Bardulf. I am pulled down with the tumble of muscle and fur, at least until Bardulf releases me as shock slackens his hand. I tumble over leaves and roots. They dig into my flesh, scratching but not causing major damage.

I collect myself to the sounds of snapping maws and growling. There isn't one wolf on the ground now, but two. They tumble and roll. Claws and jaws and blood.

"Evander!" I shout as Bardulf pounces on him. Crimson explodes across the ground.

Evander bares his teeth with a sound that resembles more a roar than a snarl. He snaps at Bardulf's throat. Bardulf narrowly dodges but Evander still rips off a chunk of meat from Bardulf.

I have to help him. The creek babbles behind them. I can't push Brundil again so soon. But Volost…

Scrambling up, I dash past the wolves. Bardulf takes note and snarls but Evander pounces upon him, taking him down before he can charge after me. Splashing into the water, I kneel, folding my hands and closing my eyes.

"Volst, I call upon you. Please, I beseech you, help me." At first, nothing. Just the sounds of the fighting wolves and the running water. My hands tremble as I clutch them tighter, reaching out with my magic. Feeling the strand of thread Evander tied around my finger. I can't let something happen to him—not before I tell him what he means to me. "Please, Volst, Gruvun, anyone. Please ."

The current stops completely. I peel one lid open and then the other. The water looks the same as normal. Except, it is unnaturally still.

"Volst?" I whisper.

A ripple thrums against me, its source unseen.

"Help him. Please, save Evander."

The stream diverts, flowing through the air as a geyser. A fist of water plows straight into Bardulf, knocking him against a tree and pinning him there with one mighty wave. Then the water seeps back into the stream, flowing like nothing happened.

Bardulf doesn't move.

"Is he…" I stand to try and spot the rise and fall of his chest. Did I just kill a man? The thought shakes me to my core and I begin to tremble all over.

Evander rushes over, changing into his human form on the way. My cloak is on his shoulders and he quickly unties it, placing it upon me. Fastening the clasp into place.

"Are you all right?" he asks hastily.

"You…" I look Evander up and down: he's covered in bruises and cuts. Deep gashes line his shoulders where Bardulf pounced into him. "You're hurt."

"Oh, this?" Evander smiles. It's forced and doesn't reach his eyes. I can see him hiding winces with every movement. "It's nothing. I've had much worse."

"We need to tend to those wounds. And Bardulf?—"

The man in question jolts back to life. In the process of rolling onto his side, he changes from his wolf form back to his human one, coughing up water. Sputtering.

"It'll take more than that to kill the bastard, unfortunately," Evander says darkly, his words ripe with anger.

"Evander," I whisper quickly as Bardulf is still composing himself. "He saw us."

"What?" Evander fixates solely on me.

"He saw us," I repeat, making sure to emphasize every word. "Together. He knows."

"She's right." Bardulf heard anyway, despite my efforts to be quiet and speak while he was distracted. "I saw everything." He twists onto his other side to face us, slowly sitting. "I give you credit, Evander, I didn't think you had it in you. Going against Conri like that when you've always been such a loyal cur on the outside. You think just because you are graced with some of the king's charm as his knight, you can steal his bitch?"

"Call her that one more time," Evander threatens, hands balled into fists so tight the massive muscles in his arms bulge.

"King's charm…" I repeat softly, my brows knitting. It's been so many days since I last felt myself slipping under Conri's aura that I had almost forgotten about it.

"Oh, you don't know?" Bardulf's attention lands solely on me. A smirk slides across his lips. "He didn't tell you, did he? Of course he didn't."

"Enough," Evander snaps.

"We knights make our oath to the wolf king and, sure, he takes our ability to have children. But for our loyalty, we don't come up empty-handed. No…we might not be able to have children, but we're not denied the pleasures of partners. In fact, it's made easier. Our oaths make us an extension of the wolf king and so we gain part of his powers."

"I said enough!" Evander roars, charging toward Bardulf.

"Let him speak!" I snap. Evander stops in his tracks. My heart is hammering, but no longer out of fear that I killed a man or of what Bardulf is going to do. I'm drawing my cloak around me as if I can defend myself from this truth.

Bardulf howls with laughter. "You dog, she didn't know. Yes, Faelyn. Your protector, darling knight has been using powers he's kept hidden from you to lure you into his bed."

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