Chapter 3

CHAPTER 3

Impeccable spatial awarenessand common sense leads me to the west wing of Queen Ulla’s palace without any assistance. I passed the dining hall on my way here. Based on the boisterous conversation and clanking of dishes, the meal was still underwear. With any luck, Thalore will be there, and I’ll be able to take in my new living accommodations without him hovering nearby.

Now that I’m in the west wing, however, I have no way of identifying which room is Thalore’s. There aren’t exactly name plates on the doors, indicating which noble family lives behind their heavy wood structures.

I am contemplating the merits of wandering the halls on the first floor until I run into a palace maid or royal guard when I hear a familiar, musical voice call, “Guardian Loftin?”

I follow the sound of Julley’s formal address and smile at her friendly face as she descends the wide staircase. “May I lead you to your rooms?”

I nod and meet her halfway up the stairs. She leads me to the third floor—the highest level in the palace. My old rooms were also on this level, but they were in the royal wing to account for my need to be close to Princess Alora.

I wonder if I will be prohibited from acting as her body decoy now that I am no longer allowed to work with the royal guard. If so, it would be an incredible waste. Though the majority of my time in Avedon was spent dealing with the betrothal contest, I did not forget there’s an unknown danger hovering over the fae royals’ heads. Elini, the youngest princess, was kidnapped from her bed. I found her in a blood laboratory in my realm. It’s what kicked off my involvement with the fae in the first place.

Just because I focused on surviving the betrothal contest doesn’t mean protecting the princesses shouldn’t be a priority. Maybe Queen Ulla will make an exception for me working as Alora’s decoy.

“Here we are.” Julley stops in front of the widest double set door on the third floor. In fact, I realize it is one of only three doors in the hall. The other two are smaller and subtle. They look like linen closets.

Julley confirms my suspicions when she says, “The Evergreen family is the only family that lives on this level of the west wing.”

The noble family must be very valuable to the queen to warrant such exclusive accommodations.

I lock that information away for later. Maybe I’ll be able to convince the illustrious family to dissolve the mating between me and Thalore. They can’t want him to be with a human. Or half-fae, if they subscribe to that narrative about my family.

Julley withdraws a bronze key and unlocks the door. She hands it to me. “Lord Thalore instructed I give this to you.”

I pocket the key and follow her inside.

My first impression of Thalore’s rooms is they have a distinctively masculine touch. Dark furniture with green, blue, and gold cushions, carpet, and drapes. I stand in the middle of a sitting room. High-backed chairs are positioned around a heavy-looking coffee table. A beverage cart covered with crystal decanters filled with amber liquid and matching glasses cover the surface. The wall to my left is covered by one massive painting, depicting a dark gray castle. A lush meadow covered in flowers stretches out from it until the grass collides with a sparkling blue body of water.

“That is Gathlas,” Julley says, noticing my preoccupation.

“Gathlas?”

“Lord Thalore’s home region. His family’s seat.”

Ah. That’s right.

I remember his lengthy title: Thalore Neris Evergreen, Lord of Gathlas of Saphrai. I never connected the title to the fact Gathlas was a region of the queen’s country.

“It’s pretty,” I mutter, admiring the painting. Aside from the castle, everything in the painting is vibrant and lovely. If it didn’t mean subjecting myself to living in the fae realm even longer, I imagine I’d like to go see it.

“It’s one of the loveliest areas in our country,” Julley agrees. Then, she’s back to business. “I moved all of your clothes and belongings to the secondary bed chamber down the hall to the right.”

“Secondary bedchamber?”

Julley gives me a knowing smile. “It was against Lord Thalore’s instructions, but I trust he will not reprimand me for it. I’m sure he wants you to be comfortable, and I know you would not be if you were forced to share a bed chamber on your first night here.”

Her thoughtfulness is touching. “I don’t deserve you, Julley.”

Her smile brightens. “Of course you do, Andie. You’ve been the kindest lady I’ve ever served. I am honored to continue working for you.”

I wish she and I could just be friends, and we are. But I know Julley takes her role as a lady’s maid very seriously. Apparently, it is an honor. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to having someone offer to wait on me hand and foot, but Julley’s gentility and genuine companionship have made it much more enjoyable than I could have ever imagined.

Honestly, I’m not sure how I would have handled the last three days without her calm, reassuring presence. And her help keeping Thalore at bay.

But now that I’m living in his family’s rooms, those days have come to an end.

Seeing the stress on my face, Julley suggests, “How about you take a relaxing bath? I brought aromatic bathing salts that should help you relax.”

“Sure.” It’s not like I have anything else to do. I follow Julley down the hall on our right. Two more landscape pictures decorate the walls. Other than that, the space is bare. We enter a bedroom. This one is decorated differently than the main space. I wouldn’t say it’s feminine, but the lighter color scheme is certainly more delicate. I’d guess a female family member decorated this room.

Julley walks into the attached bathing chamber and runs the water in the massive claw-foot tub located on the edge of the space. She pours a bowl full of lilac bathing salts into the water. “There. Soak for no less than half an hour. I’m sure it will dull some of your aches.”

I don’t know if she means my physical or mental aches. Either way, I’m not sure a bath will work. Still, I say, “Thank you, Julley. For everything.”

“Of course, Andie.” Her eyes soften. “If you need me for anything, pull the bell cord located next to your bed. It will alert the on-duty servants that you have a need and they will fetch me.”

“Okay.” I already know I will do no such thing. Julley deserves to have her nights to herself. Especially since she’s been so diligent in keeping me company these past few nights.

Julley leaves after placing a fluffy blue towel on the countertop between the double sinks. I quickly undress and twist my hair into a high bun before I slide into the warm, sweet-smelling water.

I lean my back against the edge of the tub and run my fingers over the faint scar on my thigh. A fae sea creature called a Mikira ran me through with one of its spikes. Fae healers saved me from its poison, and Shadowguard sigils healed most of the damage, but nothing could erase all evidence of the wound.

The same cannot be said for my wound on the Murky Mountain.

Death’s Kiss bit into my calf, but after exchanging life’s blood with Thalore, there is not even a mark to confirm it ever happened.

Only the repercussions of the event—our supposed mating—lingers. That, and the fact all Court watched it happen.

I linger in the water, my thoughts all over the place. I decide to get out when the water’s chill gives me goosebumps. Careful not to slip, I cross the smooth floor and grab the blue towel. I wrap it around my body.

A voice clears.

I gasp and whirl around. Thalore stands in the doorway. His hands are clenched into fists at his side, but lust covers his expression as his eyes trail over me. How long has he been standing there?

I clutch the towel to my chest. “Are you serious? Have you not heard of knocking?”

“I did. You didn’t answer.”

Did he?

“So you took that as an invitation to barge in here?”

He ignores my question. “Why are you in here?”

“I was taking a bath.”

“I can see that. What I meant was, why are you not in our room’s bathing chamber?”

“Because I told Julley I wanted my own room,” I say, covering for my friend.

“Why?”

“You know why.”

He sighs. “Andie... we should talk about this. We should talk about us.”

“We’ve talked about us enough. You know where I stand.”

He takes a step into the bathroom. “Andie, please. I know this isn’t what you wanted, but it’s what happened.”

“So I should just accept it?” My eyes narrow. “No, thank you.”

“We don’t need to be at odds, Andie. We’re mates, but I’d settle for being your friend again.”

“We are not mates. And friends don’t keep secrets and lie.”

He looks at the ceiling. “I made mistakes, Andie.” Emotion-filled green eyes lower and focus on me. “I regret many things, but not saving your life. Even if you viewed my actions as selfish and deceitful, I would do it again. I would never have let you die on that mountain. And I’m not sorry about it.”

A lump lodges in my throat. I badly want to argue. To demand he admit there was another way to save my life. To insist he didn’t have to link our lives to one another to do it. But the sincerity in his expression and the desperation in his words stops me.

I nearly let his sadness dull my anger. But I remember another reason I have to be angry with him.

“When were you going to tell me I was fired from the royal guard?”

If Thalore is surprised by the change in conversation, he doesn’t show it. “You’ve been dealing with a lot of change. There was never a good time.”

“Convenient for you.”

He takes another step. “What do you want from me, Andie? To grovel? To beg for your forgiveness? Say the word, and I will do it. I will do whatever you want to fix the problems between us. Just tell me.”

My heart races. I stare at my toes. I’m overwhelmed by his sincerity, and I hate to admit the emotion in his voice tugs on my heartstrings. “There’s nothing. You can’t go back in the past.”

“I refuse to believe that.” Thalore closes the rest of the distance between us. I don’t step back when his fingers lift my chin, bringing my eyes up to his. “I have apologized for deceiving you. I will continue to apologize every day until you forgive me. In the meantime, tell me what I can do to mend the divide between us. Tell me how we can go back to being friends.” He says friends, but the way he stares at my lips—the heated desire in his gaze—tells me that is not all he wants.

“Let me work with the guard. Give me a purpose here.” Help me pass time while I try to think of a way out of this mess.

Genuine remorse covers his expression. “I wish I could, Andie. But the queen won’t hear of it. You are Lady Gathlas now. You cannot be a guard.”

I shake my head at the title, but I don’t pick that fight. I focus on one at a time. “What about Elini?”

He stiffens. His fingers release my chin. “What about her?”

“Isn’t she still in danger? And Alora? Does the queen not care about their safety anymore?”

“Of course she does. But with Alora’s engagement, Ulla believes the threat to her daughters is over. Whoever arranged for my half-sister’s abduction did so because they disapproved of the queen’s claim to the throne.”

“And Alora’s engagement to Clifton changes that? You think they still won’t try to overthrow the queen?”

He frowns. “I do not know.”

“All the more reason for me to remain acting as Alora’s decoy. I can continue the investigation and⁠—”

“Absolutely not.” Thalore grabs my arms. His grip doesn’t hurt, but it’s firm. I could dislodge it easily, but I’m distracted by the warmth only ever caused by his touch. “If a threat continues to hang over the princesses, you must keep your distance and be safe.”

“I’m a Guardian, Thalore. I can handle myself.”

“But I cannot lose you.”

My mouth falls open, and my heart pounds in my chest.

Thalore releases my arms and spins away, stomping out of the bathroom. He’s back one second later. “You will not act as Alora’s decoy, Andie. Not anymore. You may stay in these rooms for the time being, but do not think for one second I will not fight to prove to you our connection is real. You are my mate. I belong to you, and you belong to me. Forever.”

He turns back around and leaves. This time, he does not return.