Chapter three

Carlos

Iwake up in the morning feeling bogged down by my own thoughts. My skin feels too tight, like I need to rip out of it and let myself run for the first time in years.

My fingers play with my medallion, a physical reminder of what I am and what I'm capable of. I have to hold myself back. Flashbacks of the last time I shifted come back to me without my permission, my stomach souring enough that the urge to shift drifts away. As much as I miss running on four legs and everything that comes with being in that form, the risks completely and utterly outweigh the rewards. Especially now that our little family is expanding to include mates and children. Nope, I refuse to make the same mistake again.

Once upon a time I was a cocky teenager who thought he could do no wrong. I thought my shifter skin was enough to keep me safe from anything and anyone. That proved wrong really fucking fast when a hunting group caught wind of the shenanigans I was getting myself into.

Nothing kills the mood faster than thinking about a hunter going after you or your family.

My chest clenches with longing as I think about my mom and dad. I miss them every single day, but this is for the best. They're somewhere safe and I'm making things right in the only way I know how to.

Once I'm outside, I take a deep breath, letting the cool air hit my lungs. It's a gorgeous morning and no one else is awake yet. I wonder if they're a little hung over from last night. The campground is quiet but for the sound of people's breathing and the chitter of random animals.

This uneasy feeling inside of me isn't going anywhere and I need a way to blow off some steam so after locking up my truck, I start to run.

I weave my way through the campground roads, passing campers and tents and bathrooms. When I get to the entrance and still feel like I want to scratch my skin raw, I don't turn around, instead I just continue to run. I run and run and run until my lungs burn and my thighs ache and my shirt is covered in sweat. I have no idea where I'm going only that I don't want to stop. I focus on my breathing, on the patter of my feet against the pavement. I try my best to keep my mind busy so I don't have to think about the way my true mate's face was alight with excitement not for me but for Cooper.

Gods, I hate feeling jealous.

I get it, Cooper is amazing. He's smart and handsome, but Jude is my true mate. I was expecting the meeting of my true mate to be filled with laughs and wonder and amazement, not to get burned right from the start. I figured that would come later when he realized what I was or what I've done.

Fuck, I need to stop thinking like this. I could have put off meeting Jude for a few more years so I had some more time to get my shit together but that's not how this happened. He's here and I have to deal with that.

Part of me continues to debate the merits of running away. It wouldn't be hard. I have my truck. I could easily slip away and find a new path for myself. Maybe even find a new crew to run with and continue my work as a hunter.

Even as the thoughts cross my mind I know I can't. My inner alpha would be desperate to come back and make sure Jude was alright. I couldn't do that to my crew, they're my family. I love them and would never be able to live with myself if I hurt my family like that for a second time.

Why the hell did Lady Fate think I could handle having a mate?

I'm so stuck in my head that I just barely stop myself from plowing someone over. They come out of a little coffee shop, their hands filled with drink carriers. I bump into them and the drinks start to fall from their hands but thanks to shifter reflexes I manage to grab them and keep them from hitting the ground.

"Shit. I am so sorry."

"No, no. It's okay."

I freeze, my eyes snapping up to meet Jude's. Are you fucking kidding me? Is Lady Fate so cruel? Am I really clearing my head of my true mate only to slam face first into him? Can I not catch a break?

"Jude?"

Jude reaches out, taking the coffees from my hands carefully, his eyes looking me up and down. I watch as his pretty brown eyes seem to darken. I look down at myself, realizing my shirt is plastered to my chest with sweat. Is this…. Am I turning my mate on?

As much as I hate being forced into this situation, the look in his eyes at least pulls a bit of that anxiety away from my belly, replacing it with excitement. This is how it should have been last night during our first meeting.

I clear my throat and Jude's eyes snap up to mine, his cheeks turning an adorable pink color at being caught checking me out. He has nothing to be embarrassed about though, it makes me feel just a tiny bit better, knowing my mate at least finds me attractive.

"What are you doing here, Carlos?"

"I was out for a run," I tell him, nodding down to the pile of coffees in his hands. "Where are you off to with all of that?"

"My cousins are waiting for me at my house and since I was up before them all, I figured it would be nice if I brought coffee."

"You live around here?"

Jude nods, starting to walk down the sidewalk. I fall in step with him. I hold out my hands and he reluctantly hands the coffees over, taking one out of the carrier for himself. I smile to myself.

I was so fucking sure I didn't want this just a few moments ago but now that I'm in Jude's presence, now that I'm smelling his scent again, I know I would never be able to run from this. Being around him is like the moon orbiting the Earth, unable to pull away even if it wanted to.

"I've lived in this little town my whole life."

"Do you like it?"

Jude looks up at me before giving me a shrug. "That's all I know. It's safe in that way, but I've always dreamed of leaving. Not for the sake of getting out but because I knew there were things I wanted to see and explore and find."

I hum as I listen, taking his words in. "So you've always thought about leaving someday?"

"Yes," he tells me seriously. "From a teenager, I dreamed about leaving so I could find my spark."

Ah. Yes. His spark. Who's so much more important than me. Got it. I put on my best smile even though I know it falls flat.

"My cousins and I all devised this plan to go on a cross country road trip. We're all familiars and we could go off on our own and find our sparks together." There's a hint of longing in his voice that makes me pause.

"Are you disappointed that you found Cooper so easily?"

"No," he says right away, shaking his head. "Meeting Cooper has been everything I hoped it would be and more. I can feel him right here," Jude explains, touching the center of his chest. "It feels surreal, like a part of me was missing without me even realizing it. But my cousins are planning on leaving tomorrow and I won't be going with them."

We continue walking and I take a chance, moving the coffees to one hand and putting the other on Jude's back. I'm worried he might flinch away, but instead he looks up at me with soft eyes. "You're going to miss them."

"They're like my brothers," he says softly, leaning against my side for a moment before straightening. I don't understand my mate. I don't understand how he can instantly love Cooper but not crave that same connection with me. I just don't get him. But that's okay because I have time to learn.

I'm not running.

"I'm sorry you can't go with them."

Jude shakes his head. "I'm not." Instead of just leaning against my side, Jude wraps his arm around my waist and my chest warms. He's shorter than me and I just barely keep myself from leaning down and burying my nose in his blond hair so I can breathe him in. "I'm really happy that I got to meet you and Cooper and everyone else. I know my focus is very front and center on Cooper right now but that's because our bond is freshly made. That doesn't take away the joy I feel knowing I've met you as well."

I swallow around the lump in my throat. I really needed to hear that. I needed confirmation that my true mate wants me, that he craves this connection the same way I do. "Thank you," I say softly, wrapping my arm around his shoulders and squeezing for a moment before letting go.

"You don't have to thank me," Jude says with a warm laugh that brings a smile to my own lips. "I'm just telling you the truth."

"But still," I say with a shrug. "I kinda needed to hear that."

Jude's brows dip down. "I'm sorry if I didn't seem excited to meet you. Willow had a few words to say to me last night about how I should have greeted you first and then Cooper. But what's done is done and all we can do is move forward."

"I think I like this Willow person."

"Oh my gods," Jude says with a hint of a whine. "Do not tell him that or he'll never let me hear the end of it."

We're in a little neighborhood where all the houses look similar with matching fences. It's the type of place where everyone knows each other and has barbecues together on Sundays. It's homey in a way that sends a tiny pang of longing through my chest, mixing with sadness and tiny bit of nostalgia.

"This one is mine," Jude says, pointing up towards a lavender house with a white door. He bites his lips for a moment. I'm expecting him to take the coffees from me and walk into the house but instead he touches my shoulder. "Would you like to come inside and meet everyone?"

My stomach flutters with nerves. Before I can second guess myself I nod. "I'd love to."

Jude leads me up the steps to the front door and I only have a moment of panic, wondering what the fuck I've just gotten myself into before we're walking inside.