Chapter ten

Zander

It's been a few days since my heat has faded for good. Ronny helped me through each wave of my heat, holding me tight, whispering soft things in my ear while I was overwhelmed with pleasure. It was amazing and I've found myself dreaming about the experience at night.

JJ has taken all of these changes in stride. He sleeps beside me every night, tucked against my chest while Ronny lays against my back. I'm sandwiched between the two most important men in my life.

I feel lucky.

Once upon a time, I wouldn't have dreamed of running. I would have been terrified of rocking the boat. I wouldn't raise my voice, I wouldn't stir the pot, I would be seen but not heard. Now I feel safe enough to speak up.

I keep saying it was all for JJ. I wanted a good life for him. And that's the truth, but I would be lying if I said I didn't dream of finding a shred of happiness for myself as well. I dreamed of my own personal prince charming that would save me. He would whisk me away from John and take me somewhere safe where I could be happy. Instead, I saved myself.

Any time now, Cooper and Martin will be back to camp to report if they've found anything from the wishing well. But right this second, I stand in front of the bathroom mirror, staring at myself.

I turn to the side, staring down at my stomach.

"There's no way," I whisper to myself, my hand going to the tiny swell I see there. There's no way, right?

The gestation period of a cat shifter is around two months, so when we find ourselves pregnant, everything goes fast. Including when we first begin to show.

I swallow thickly as I stare at myself. I already know the truth. I can smell it on myself. But knowing it and acknowledging it are two very different things. This changes everything. Even though everything was already changing. Oh gods, can I handle this after everything else?

I lean against the sink, getting closer to my reflection. I look into my green eyes, hoping my reflection will tell me what I need to hear. And maybe it does because instead of a deep frown and eyes laced with fear, I notice I have the tiniest smile. No longer am I stuck with a litter that worships a man that treated me like shit. Now I have a family, one who already cares for me, willing to do what it takes to protect me and my child.

"I can do this," I tell myself in the mirror and my eyes silently tell me that I believe the words to be true. I don't want to count this as a win yet, not when there's still so many things that are not certain. But I can't help but let hope bloom within my chest at the idea of being with these people, of being with Ronny.

I take my time heading back to camp, smiling when I overhear Martin and Carlos' voices. I find everyone sitting around the fire, the afternoon warm but not too hot that we can't enjoy a lit fire in between us.

"Papa! Come sit by us," JJ calls out, beckoning me over to where he's sitting on Ronny's lap. Ronny gives me a gentle smile, holding out his hand for me. I take it and he pulls me in, kissing me on the cheek. "Eww," JJ murmurs, wrinkling his nose at us and I can't help but snort.

"Oh," Ronny murmurs, "maybe I shouldn't do that. I'm sorry."

JJ looks at Ronny with a serious face. "Ronny, you can kiss my Papa as much as you want. But not when I'm sitting on your lap. Deal?"

Ronny looks shocked, his eyes going down to JJ's little outstretched hand, waiting for Ronny to make this a true deal. Martin chuckles and I look over at Jeff and Axel, finding them smiling over at our little unit with soft smiles. These hunters are so goddamn soft. I adore it. The atmosphere here is so different than my old litter, further cementing the hope inside me that this will work for the long run.

"I'll take that deal," Ronny finally says, shaking JJ's hand.

"So anyway," I say loudly, changing the subject. Carlos gives me a knowing look that I absolutely ignore. "Did you already tell everyone what you found? Did I miss it?"

Martin shakes his head. "Nah, we were waiting for you. I thought you'd like to hear how this all went down."

"Very much so," I say, waving him to go on.

Cooper leans forward with an amused look on his face. "Well, as you know, last night Ronny hacked into the cameras so we could check it out after everything shut down for the night."

"Right," I say, nodding along, remembering Ronny being up late on his computer. "So what did you find?"

"We decided it would be best to just jump down into the wishing well," Martin explains, "there was a trap door hidden on the side that we could crawl through. We followed the ladder down and found someone's home."

"You're kidding," I blurt out, completely enraptured in this story. "Someone's living in the well?"

"Yep," Cooper says, popping his P. "Long story short, there's a gnome living down there. He's old as fuck but harmless. We told him he had to stop twisting people's wishes or we'd kick him out of his house. He said he was too old to find a place that provided entertainment, free food, and unlimited coins." Cooper shrugs. "Fair enough if you ask me."

I sit back in my seat, letting out an amused chuckle. "So it really was some weirdo in the well."

Jeff laughs. "Not every hunt is something extravagant, thankfully. Sometimes we fight evil. But on good days, we just have to harass an old man into not using his magic for his own entertainment."

"Papa? Can I harass old men?"

I look over at my son, doing my best not to immediately burst into laughter. My eyes meet Ronny's and we share an amused look. I take a deep breath. "Umm? Maybe it's best to leave that to the professionals for now, okay? Maybe when you're older."

"Old people get to have all the fun," JJ murmurs, pouting in my direction.

"Maybe when you're older you'll want to be a hunter," Ronny says carefully, rubbing JJ's back. "But maybe you'll realize you want to choose another path. Maybe you'll wanna be a firefighter. Or something stable, like an accountant."

"That sounds boring," JJ says with a wrinkle of his nose.

"The important part is that you can be whatever you want and this group will all do their best to make that happen, okay?"

JJ looks at Ronny for a long moment before giving him a big hug. "I love you, Ronny. I'm gonna be an astronaut so that I can go to the moon and look back at you being tiny as an ant. Okay?"

Ronny's face is overcome with emotion. He kisses the top of JJ's head before murmuring. "I love you too, buddy. And that sounds like a good plan to me."

Seeing them together like this threatens to bring tears to my eyes. They fit together better than I could ever dream. Maybe this shift won't be as hard for JJ as I feared. Apparently it's me holding everything up with my doubts and insecurities. Thankfully, these people don't seem to be going anywhere and don't mind me taking as much time as I need.

Jeff clears his throat and Ronny looks over. "So, have you found us something new?"

"I have actually," Ronny says, readjusting JJ on his lap. "I think we're heading to the coast."

"What's caught your attention?"

"There's cases of people going missing near the coast. But it's strange. They go missing for a weekend before seemingly being deposited back at the same bar they were last seen at with no memory of what happened."

"What are you thinking?" Cooper asks, looking intrigued. I can't say I blame him. I'm interested in knowing more too.

"My gut says a succubus. They could be seducing people, taking them for a weekend of feeding, before depositing their victims back at the bar. Possibly a mage who's capable of clearing memories. Maybe even some vampires, though there hasn't been any signs of bites so it's probably not that."

"Well check it out," Jeff says with a nod. He reaches over, lacing his fingers with Axel's.

"I've never been to the coast," Axel says with a smile. "It might be cool to have my toes in the sand for a little while."

"After we've finished the case," Jeff says, kissing the back of Axel's hand.

"Don't worry, I have no plans of getting myself into trouble again. But once everything is said and done, I'm sure JJ wouldn't mind swimming in the ocean for the first time either."

My stomach flutters with warmth, thinking about everyone thinking about JJ as part of the team. They think of me as part of the team. I reach over, taking Ronny's hand in my own, lacing our fingers together. He squeezes my hand, his silent way of saying he's here and that he cares for me.

I want to keep walls up high. I want to protect myself from being hurt. But the longer I'm here and the more I get to know these people, the safer it feels to let those walls down.