Chapter eleven

Jeff

Axel's been off the last week.

Yes, I realize I've only known him a few weeks but during that time I truly do feel like I've gotten to know him. Well enough that I can notice when he's not exactly being himself. Call it hunter intuition, call it instincts, all I know is that something is different.

And that's without thinking about his scent. The smell of fresh rain is heightened with new notes to it. Something like lilacs or honey are mixed in there. It's delicious and new and making my brain absolutely melt with emotions that I don't quite understand.

At this point, I've started to get used to my instincts. They pop up at random times. Instincts to protect Axel, or to call Carlos and check in on him, or needing to wear Axel's clothes so his scent is close to me.

Once everyone has been ushered out of our home, I tug Axel close. I ignore the way I've started calling this place my home. It's not necessarily this apartment, I realize, but the place I share with Axel. He's my home now. Wherever he is that is where I'll be.

I run my thumb over his cheek softly, my stomach swooping when he smiles up at me. Gods, I can't even begin to describe the feelings welling up inside of me. They're all consuming until I'm completely caught ablaze, burning away the selfish parts of myself and focusing on Axel and being the best partner I can be for him.

The vampire in front of me is kind, and funny, and beautiful. It truly must have been an act of Lady Fate to orchestrate this meeting because there's no way it happened by chance.

I lean down and kiss Axel's lips. His hands go around my middle, holding me tight. My stomach swoops with affection. I didn't even know it was possible to fall for someone this quickly. Maybe it's because we're true mates, maybe it's because I'm a vampire, or maybe it's just Axel. I don't care what it is, I just care about Axel. And I care about him knowing how I feel.

Maybe if he knows I'm in this with both feet, it'll help whatever's going on inside his head this last week.

"I have plans for you," I murmur against Axel's lips, feeling the way they split into a smile.

"Oh yeah?"

"Mhmm. Very good plans. The best really. Would you like to hear about them?"

There's a moment of hesitation. "I should really talk to you about something first."

I pull back, running my nose gently over his before nodding slowly. "Okay, baby. You can talk to me about anything, okay?" I take his hand, leading him over to the couch and sitting down. My thumb runs over his knuckles, wanting him to know I'm here, that we're connected. My eyes glance up at the mating bite on his throat, a flutter of possession going through me at the sight.

"This is going to be a bit of a shock," Axel murmurs, looking self-conscious and worried.

"More shocking than waking up a vampire?"

Axel finally cracks the smallest smile, his eyes meeting mine. "It's gonna be about the same level I think," he says carefully. "I'm not sure if I've explicitly said this but I'm a born vampire."

"Okay," I say slowly, "I already knew that."

"Great. One less thing to explain. Umm, so there are some things born vampires can do that bitten ones cannot."

"I read about this," I tell him, proud of myself for the research I've done. "They don't have the same ties that turned vampires have which is kinda nice. And they're able to have babies with their mates. I read about all of this in the books that Cooper let me borrow. It's kinda fascinating."

"Right," Axel says and when our eyes meet, my stomach clenches. He's staring at me, willing me to understand something that's apparently flying over my head. I think back to this conversation, to what I've said.

"I'm sorry, baby, but I'm still not getting it. You're gonna have to spell it out for me."

Axel lets out a long breath, shaking his head at me. But it's a playful look, not one of real frustration. "I'm surprised you haven't picked up on the signs yet," he says, taking my hand and bringing it to his stomach. "Listen, Jeff."

I close my eyes and focus on listening. There's someone walking outside, their boots clicking against the sidewalk. There are birds chirping on a nearby branch. A twig snaps. I focus closer. There. I tilt my head, really listening. What is that?

I open my eyes and look at Axel. "There's like a weird whumping sound? What is that?"

Axel full on rolls his eyes at me. "Oh my gods," he murmurs before squeezing my wrist. "The sound is coming from in there."

I stare at him a long moment before it hits me. Oh. Oh wow. Holy shit. Okay.

"You're pregnant?"

Axel nods his head slowly, gauging my reaction. He looks nervous and that's the last feeling he should be happening. I smile so wide my cheeks hurt before pulling him into my lap, wrapping my arms around him tight and burying my face against his throat. I hold him for a long time.

Holy shit. I'm going to be a dad. That wasn't something I'd let myself think about. Children aren't really something I let myself hope for because I'm a hunter. My job is dangerous and scary and one wrong turn I would leave that kid without a dad.

Can I even keep hunting? Should I give up this life?

Holy shit.

"Are you upset?"

I pull back, looking up into Axel's eyes. "Far from it," I tell him seriously. I touch his cheek gently and he leans into my touch. "I'm overwhelmed but not in a bad way." I tug Axel down, kissing his lips softly. "I'm happy, baby."

"You are?"

"Yes. We're gonna have a baby. We're gonna have a child together. A family. It's so much, but I'm also so, so happy, Axel."

Axel's fingers run through my hair. "I'm happy too. I never dreamed of meeting my true mate but now you're here. You're so good, Jeff. A hunter who takes care of those weaker than you. I admire you so much and I couldn't be more proud that our baby will have a father like you."

I feel my throat tighten at Axel's words. "How can I be a hunter and a dad?" I ask the questions rattling inside of me.

Axel gives a small shrug. "I have no idea but I know we'll figure it out. I can live in the RV. Or we can buy some different places around the country as home bases."

"With what money? Hunting doesn't really pay the bills, baby," I say with a self-depreciating huff.

"Oh, umm, I can take care of that," Axel says. "My fathers made sure I would want for nothing. They've been alive a long time and invested. I'm what the kids would call a trust fund baby."

"Wait. Hold on," I say, a grin spreading across my lips. "You're my sugar daddy?"

Axel slaps my shoulder, letting out a giggle. "Shut it, Jeff. I'm just saying we can make this work. As long as you want to make it work?"

"Very much so," I say without even needing to think about it. "I can't imagine you raising this baby without me by your side. It won't be a conventional family or home, but it'll be ours." Already, I can see it. Home bases all over the country and taking jobs close by, moving from house to house, having a place for the crew to park their RVs at. The plan is already forming in my brain and I love it.

I love him.

Which is why he deserves to know the whole truth. "I've never told you about my family," I say slowly, holding onto Axel's hand and leaning on his strength."

"You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to, Jeff."

"I want to tell you," I say right away, taking a steadying breath. "I come from a hunting family. My mom and dad taught me and my sister everything there was to know about the lifestyle."

Axel tugs my hand up and kisses my knuckles. "That must have been a really hard childhood," he whispers.

"You'd think, but we were still allowed to be kids. We played and traveled and would often stay with random relatives while our parents worked. We didn't even realize the truth of what was happening until we were older to understand. My sister and I started training as a team. We were inseparable." A pang of longing hits me straight in the chest. I missed that. Missed having her in my pocket, anticipating my moves before I even did them. I miss my sister.

"But something changed when we became adults," I continue on, wishing this wasn't so hard. I thought with time I would be easier but it hasn't. "She started dating this guy. He was really nice to her and had a twin brother. I thought things were going well."

When I pause, Axel whispers, "what happened?"

I clear my throat, looking away. "My sister went rogue. She killed the guy's parents. And then she tried to kill him and his brother."

"Oh gods," Axel murmurs, covering his mouth with his hand.

"Yeah," I say humorlessly. "It was awful. She died that night. The guy was a dragon shifter and she thankfully wasn't prepared. When I found her, my parents took her side instead of seeing how fucking wrong it was for her to hunt anyone that wasn't human."

Axel carefully crawls into my lap, holding my face between his hands. "You do not have to pay for the sins of your sister," he says and all the air leaves my lungs in one deep sigh. Emotions well up inside of me. I want to fight him so badly because I deserve to hurt for her sins. I should have seen the signs. I should have stopped her.

But I hold onto his words with everything I have inside of me. I hold onto them and fucking pray that someday I'll believe them.

"That's why my team lives by a code," I whisper, my voice much softer now that Axel is in my lap. I meet his pretty brown eyes, willing him to understand.

"You're a good man, Jeff. You are good. Redemption isn't a thing you need to earn because you haven't done the wrong. But it's admirable that you live by a code and shield humans from danger."

I rest my forehead against the center of his chest, letting him run his fingers through my hair. I am so in love with this man.

These few weeks have been so fucking hard, learning self-control, learning to drink blood without letting the hunger consume me, learning about my instincts and feelings. But being with Axel has been so easy. Being with him is like breathing. We belong together.

It might have been a short time but already I know I can't go back to what it was like not having him in my life. I can't go back to not having him near.

I love him.

I take Axel's hand, bringing it to my mouth and kissing each of his fingers. My fangs slide down and Axel sucks in a sharp breath that makes me smile.

I don't say the words. Not yet. But I do take Axel to our bedroom and show him my feelings with gentle kisses, soothing touches, and soft, murmured words. My wonderful mate. My soul mate. My baby's father.

I love him and I promise to protect him, to love him, and to make sure he never questions my feelings for him.