Chapter 16

16

M eg supposed she should feel at least a twinge of satisfaction.

For the first time since she'd made her debut, she'd danced at a ball. And she hadn't utterly humiliated herself.

They hadn't been the epitome of grace, to be sure, but no one had landed face first on the ground.

Surely this was a cause for celebration. But as she followed Carver out onto the veranda, her chest was too tight with nerves. There was no room for celebration.

This was the time.

Her friends were right. There was no avoiding this marriage, but they might as well go into it with a clear understanding. So before he could say a word, she said, "I wish to apologize."

It might have been a good start to the speech she'd memorized, if he hadn't spoken at the same exact time. "I must confess."

For a long moment they stood there staring at one another, registering one other's words. And then, in a moment of absolute absurdity, they did it again.

"You wish to confess?"

"Why would you need to apologize?"

They shared another long stare, but this one was filled with two nervous laughs.

She gestured to him, even as he said, "Please, if I may…"

She nodded, and he cleared his throat. That sound made the nerves within her scream in warning.

He was going to back out. He was going to tell her he realized his mistake and wished to cry off. He was going to say?—

"I'm in love with you."

She blinked. Her lips worked but no sound came out.

"I…you…." Surely, she was hearing things. "What?"

His throat worked as he swallowed. "I'm in love with you. And I have been for…I don't know how long. Since that first night when I asked you to dance, perhaps. I didn't think you'd say yes, but it was the way you handled it all. Your bravery. Your pride. The fact that you looked straight into my eyes like I was your fellow man, and not…not a title."

Her eyes were beginning to sting with unshed tears, and for the life of her she couldn't say why. But her throat was tight when she finally said, "Are you being sincere?"

His brows arched, and she hurried on. "It's just…you're so kind. I realize that now. I think I knew that from the start. Before all the misunderstandings, I mean." She wet her lips, and her gaze darted about the crowded veranda until he reached for her hands.

Then her heart stopped. The whole world seemed to stop as her gaze collided with his.

"You think I'm saying those words just to be kind," he said.

The air of disbelief that surrounded his words was more heartening than anything else he might have said.

She pressed her lips together as she nodded. Then, when she saw hurt creep into his eyes, she added quickly, "We are to be married. I thought perhaps…perhaps you wished to make me feel better about the fact that you're being forced into this and?—"

"But that's just it." He squeezed her hands and tugged her closer, and then shifted them both so they were out of view from prying eyes. "That's what I wished to confess. I wanted to court you in earnest from the start. This was what I wanted. But I meant it when I'd said I wanted you to have a choice, and?—"

He stopped at the awkward sound that escaped her. It wasn't quite a laugh, but it wasn't a sob either. He winced. "I understand if you cannot forgive me?—"

"No. No, no, that's not it." She shook her head, tightening her grip as well so they were clinging to each other as if they were in danger of being lost at sea. "It's just…I was going to apologize as well. For not putting a stop to our ruse."

His brows furrowed as his gaze searched hers.

"I knew the danger. I know my parents well, and it shouldn't have come as a shock—" She swallowed hard. "Indeed, it didn't come as a shock. And I was so worried you'd resent me forever for not putting a stop to it in time."

There was an eagerness in his gaze now…a hope that she understood all too well.

It was a hope she was still afraid to feel even now after he'd said the words she'd never imagined she'd hear.

"But I didn't stop it…I couldn't stop it because…because I was enjoying myself far too much," she said. "And I'd let myself hope that you were too."

"I was! I am," he amended. He pulled her into his arms, seemingly heedless of who might see or what they might say. "I want this, Meg. I want you. As my wife."

That hope she'd been holding back burst forth with a joy so overwhelming, it stole her voice? "Truly?" she whispered.

But she could see the truth of it right there in his eyes. They gleamed with an affection that went so much deeper than she'd dared to hope.

"And you truly don't resent me for leaving you no other option?" he asked.

She pressed her hands into his chest, and hoped he saw the same earnest urgency in her gaze. "There is no other option," she said simply. "There is only you."

His eyes glimmered with emotion as he leaned down. "And for me, there is only you."

Her smile felt tremulous. "I'm almost afraid to believe this is really happening."

His laugh was choked, but his smile warmed her all the way through. "I feel the same. But fortunately we'll have the rest of our lives to become accustomed to it."

Her own laughter was cut short when lips met hers in a kiss so sweet, so sincere all she could do was cling to his jacket as his mouth branded hers. The heat of his lips, his masculine scent, the strength of his arms wrapped around her waist—it made her mind go so blank, she forgot where they were.

And who was surrounding them.

"Ahem!"

They sprang apart. And Meg's cheeks burned as she met Carver's cousin's amused gaze.

"Kal, what are you—" Carver started. He stopped when he too seemed to realize that they were the center of attention.

Meg was suddenly and acutely aware of the whispers going on around them.

"It seems you two are determined to cause a scandal wherever you go," Kal said mildly. There was no accusation in his tone, only wry amusement.

"I thought perhaps I'd better intervene before her father came out here demanding you wed right here on the spot," the marquess added.

Carver's smile was unapologetic, and Meg decided right then and there that she rather adored that rakish grin when he turned his gaze back to her.

"Perhaps we should scandalize them some more with my horrid dancing," he teased.

He held out a hand to her, his gaze searching.

She slid her gloved hand into his as a laugh bubbled up inside her. "I suppose we ought to resume your lessons. Why not here?"

His grin broadened as he tugged her close. "Excellent. I want everyone to see just how much I relish dancing with my bride-to-be."

Her heart melted in her chest. "You have nothing to prove, you know. Not to me."

"Oh, I know." He tucked her hand into the crook of his arm as he nodded to his cousin. When they were further away, nearly to the veranda doors, he leaned down close. "Showing this crowd how much I adore you…That's all for me. I want the world to know how lucky I am."

Her laugh was whipped away by a strong breeze as he opened the door for her. "In that case…lead the way, my charming Duke."