5. Chapter Five

Chapter Five

T he golden sun peeked above the horizon, casting a warm glow on Clarissa's fair skin as she stood at the railing of the Santa Dorotéia, near-becalmed on the still Mediterranean Sea in the early morning. The gentle rocking motion of the ship lulled her into a contemplative state as she gazed out upon the shimmering sea. Her hair, bleached by the sun and tossed about by the salty breeze, framed her thoughtful expression.

"Captain de Silva," she called, turning to where Rafael stood nearby, his eyes fixed on the horizon. "May I ask you something rather personal?"

Rafael's sea-green eyes flickered with hesitation, but he nodded. "Of course, my lady."

"Tell me about your family." He interested her, this enigmatic Portuguese captain.

He hesitated, tugging at the cuff of his jacket before replying. "My father and older brothers were killed in the war. It fell upon me to become the head of the family and care for my mother and sister."

Clarissa's gaze softened with sympathy. "How terrible," she murmured. "How old were you?"

"Twelve," Rafael answered, his eyes growing distant as he spoke, his voice tinged with sorrow. "We had to abandon our home."

"Is that why you joined the English Navy?" Clarissa asked, her curiosity piqued.

"Indeed," he said, a small, sad smile playing at the corners of his mouth. "My mother found refuge in England, and I enlisted in their navy so that I might improve my prospects and provide for my family. That is also how I came to speak English so well."

"And now you have your own ship, sailing beneath the Portuguese flag?" she prompted, hoping to learn more about him.

"Once it was finally safe to return to Portugal," he replied, his voice heavy with emotion, "we found our estate in a state of near ruin. The war had taken its toll, and there was little left of the home I once knew. Plying my trade upon the sea was the only way I could raise the funds to even begin restoring our fortunes."

Clarissa's heart ached for him. "I can only imagine how difficult that must have been for you and your family," she murmured.

Rafael smiled faintly, though the sadness still lingered in his eyes. "It was a great challenge," he admitted, "but I knew it was my duty to restore our home and provide for my mother and sister. Their well-being has always been my top priority."

"Your dedication to your family is truly commendable, Captain," Clarissa remarked, her admiration evident. "Many would have buckled beneath such adversity, but you've faced it head-on and remained steadfast in your resolve."

"Thank you, Lady Clarissa," he replied, inclining his head humbly. "But I am merely doing what any honourable man would do in my place."

"Perhaps," she allowed, her eyes never leaving his face. "But I believe it takes a rare and exceptional individual to maintain such strength of character and conviction in the face of overwhelming hardship."

He smiled slightly and inclined his head, but said no more, looking away from her and up towards the sails, still hanging almost limp from the masts.

She was a curious creature, this daughter of an English earl. He had met plenty such during his years in England, but none were so outspoken as Lady Clarissa Creighton. Nor could he imagine any of them bearing up so well under the ordeal she had endured. She spoke of the hardships he had endured, but he had never been kidnapped by corsairs and threatened with being sold in a slave auction to a terrible fate!

"Captain, you have spoken of your family and the hardships they endured during the war," Clarissa began again, curiosity sparkling in her blue eyes. "But what of the lands that are now yours to protect? Can you describe to me the beauty of Portugal and your ancestral home?"

Rafael hesitated for a moment, his heart swelling with love and pride. He cast his gaze towards the west in the direction of his homeland, as if trying to will the image of his home into existence before him, and then began to speak.

"Portugal is a land of contrasts, Lady Clarissa," he said, his voice filled with warmth and affection. "From the lush, verdant hills of the north to the rugged, sun-baked cliffs of the south, there is a beauty that is both wild and untamed, yet also deeply serene."

He paused for a moment, recalling the rolling vineyards that surrounded his family's estate, the vibrant green leaves contrasting against the rich, dark soil beneath. "Our lands lie nestled in a valley, bathed in sunlight and blessed with fertile earth that yields an abundance of crops and fine grapes for our winemaking endeavours. A river runs through it, providing sustenance to the fields and a gentle song to accompany the whispering breeze that rustles through the trees."

As he spoke, a wistful smile played at the corners of his mouth, his sea-green eyes shining with the memories of a happier time. "Before the war, our estate was a place of laughter and joy, filled with the voices of family and friends as we gathered to celebrate life's many blessings. The air was rich with the scent of jasmine and orange blossoms, mingling with the earthy aroma of the vineyards, creating a perfume that was both intoxicating and invigorating."

"Your words paint a vivid picture, Captain," Clarissa murmured, her eyes softening with empathy. "It must have been truly heartbreaking to see such a beautiful place ravaged by the horrors of war."

"Indeed it was," Rafael admitted quietly, his features shadowed by sorrow as he remembered that first sight of his home, the vineyards burned, the few people remaining shattered and terrorised. "But I believe that with time, love, and perseverance, we can restore our home to its former glory. For it is not merely the land itself that holds the key to my heart, but the spirit of the people who dwell within it – my family, my friends, and all those who have stood by us through even the darkest times. My mother runs our estate more than capably in my absence, as we are yet in needs of the funds I earn captaining my ship."

"Your family sounds truly remarkable," she said, admiration shining in her eyes. "And if I may say so, Captain de Silva, you have shown great humility in spite of your noble lineage."

"Ah, but Lady Clarissa," Rafael replied with a wry smile, "it is adversity that often teaches us the most valuable lessons in life. I had no choice but to learn from the challenges that fate has thrown my way."

"Indeed," she mused, reflecting on the countless arrogant nobles she had encountered back in England. "And yet, so many people of noble birth seem unable to grasp that simple truth."

"Perhaps they have not yet faced the trials that force them to confront their own humanity," he suggested, his voice tinged with sadness.

"Tell me about your sister, Isabella," Clarissa ventured, her voice gentle and inviting. "You mentioned her earlier, and I cannot help but wonder what kind of person she is."

Rafael's face softened as he thought of his mischievous younger sibling. "Ah, minha irm?," he began, his tone equal parts affection and exasperation. "Isabella is a force to be reckoned with. She has always been full of life and energy, even when our circumstances were at their most dire."

"Indeed?" Clarissa leaned forward, her eyes sparkling with curiosity. "Do tell."

"Isabella once convinced one of our neighbours that she had discovered a magical spring in the woods near our estate," he recounted, a mischievous twinkle lighting up his sea-green eyes. "She swore it could turn back time and restore youth to all who drank from its waters."

"Goodness!" Clarissa gasped, her hand flying to her mouth to stifle a giggle. "And did anyone actually believe her?"

"Alas, yes," Rafael admitted with a wry smile. "Several of our more gullible neighbors eagerly set off in search of this fabled fountain, only to return empty-handed and thoroughly drenched after Isabella led them straight into a rather deep pond."

Clarissa shook her head, her laughter now unrestrained. "How wonderful it must be to have such a spirited and imaginative sibling."

"Indeed, she is a constant source of amusement and delight," Rafael agreed, his own laughter subsiding as he gazed out at the glittering expanse of water before him. The playful memories of his past momentarily gave way to a more sombre reflection, and his brow furrowed with the weight of his responsibilities.

As captain of the Santa Dorotéia, Rafael bore the lives of his crew and the safety of those they protected upon his shoulders. Yet even as he navigated the treacherous waters of the Mediterranean, his thoughts were never far from his family in Portugal and the duty he owed to them.

"Captain?" Clarissa asked softly, concern lacing her voice as she noticed the shift in his demeanour. "Is everything all right?"

"Forgive me," he murmured, offering her a small, reassuring smile. "I was simply thinking of my duties – as a captain, and as a brother."

"Ah," she nodded, understanding dawning in her eyes. "It must be difficult to balance the responsibilities of both roles, especially when they often seem at odds with one another."

"Indeed," he admitted, his gaze turning introspective. "There are times when I question whether I am truly doing what is best for my family by being so far from them, but then I remember that it is also my duty to protect others from the dangers that lurk upon these seas."

"Sometimes, the most difficult choices we make are the ones that truly define us," Clarissa said softly.

"You are astute, for one so young," Rafael said thoughtfully, his gaze dwelling on her. "And if I might say so… quite different from other gently-born English ladies I have met." A gentle breeze tugged at Clarissa's sun-bleached hair, her refusal to wear a bonnet granting her a rebellious allure that captivated Rafael's attention.

She smirked a little and looked away, but he had not asked a question, and she did not volunteer any explanations. They stood together, watching the quiet sea.

"Family is important too," Clarissa said suddenly, breaking the comfortable silence that had fallen between them. "In fact, my sister Diana is the only reason I would ever want to go back to England."

Startled, he looked at her. "Not your parents, or your home?"

"No." Her face was still and calm as she spoke. "They love me, and I love them, but their expectations of me are not ones I can fulfil. Diana, unlike them, accepts me for exactly who I am."

"Your sister must be someone truly special," Rafael replied.

"Indeed, she is," Clarissa agreed, her voice laced with affection. "Diana is the one person I love unconditionally. She has always been a source of kindness and support, and it was no surprise to me that a duke saw her worth and snatched her up for his bride." Clarissa smiled, a dazzling display that set Rafael's heart racing.

"The breeze is coming up," he noted, seeing her curls beginning to blow about. "I had best escort you below and be about my duties."

"Thank you for spending the time with me, Captain." She made him an elegant little curtsy. "I have enjoyed our conversation."

"So have I," he said, surprised to find that he meant it. Conversing with gently bred young ladies was normally a complicated matter, full of pitfalls and hidden codes Rafael had neither the patience nor the inclination to decipher. Talking with Clarissa felt refreshingly straightforward; she said what she thought without cloaking it in pretty language or riddles.

"We should make Livorno by morning," Rafael noted as he escorted Clarissa back to his cabin. "The lull has delayed us somewhat, but hopefully we will now make good headway."

"Thank you once again, for escorting me." She glanced over her shoulder at him as she made her way along the narrow passageway. "I do not know what I should have done without your aid."

"I will try to escort you up on deck again later," he said a little awkwardly, and she flashed him that dazzling smile once again.

"I will be grateful for it, but do not feel obliged. This has been more than enough."

For a smile like that, a man could be persuaded to do a great many things, Rafael reflected as he made his way back up on deck and over to where his first mate had the wheel.

The sun's last rays cast a golden glow on the rippling waves, painting the horizon in shades of pink and orange. A gentle breeze stirred the sails of the Santa Dorotéia, as Rafael and Clarissa again stood side by side at the railing, their eyes drawn to the breathtaking panorama before them.

"Such beauty," Clarissa murmured, her voice soft and reverent. "It reminds me of a line from one of my favorite poets, Lord Byron: ‘She walks in beauty, like the night / Of cloudless climes and starry skies.'"

"Ah, you have a taste for poetry, Lady Clarissa?" Rafael asked, looking at her with newfound appreciation.

"Indeed, Captain," she replied, a playful smile gracing her lips. "I find that words have a power all their own, able to capture the essence of a moment or a feeling."

"Then perhaps I can share a verse from one of my own favourite poets, Luís de Cam?es," Rafael offered, his gaze returning to the sea. "‘All hushed the heaven and earth, and wind the same /The waves all spreading o'er the sandy plain / While sleep doth in the sea the fish enchain / Nocturnal silence brooding as a dream.'"

"Beautiful," Clarissa breathed, clearly moved by his recitation. "There is a depth of longing in those words that resonates within my soul."

"Poetry has a way of revealing our deepest desires, even when we are not aware of them ourselves," Rafael mused.

"True," Clarissa agreed, lost in thought. "Sometimes, it takes the right combination of words to help us understand what lies hidden in our hearts."

As the sky darkened, stars began to dot the vast expanse above them, adding to the enchantment of the scene. Rafael could not help but notice how the silvery moonlight danced on Clarissa's hair, and he felt an unfamiliar longing stirring within him.

"Captain," Clarissa ventured hesitantly, her voice barely a whisper. "Have you ever considered that perhaps our lives, like the verses of a poem, are meant to follow a certain rhythm or structure?"

"An intriguing thought, Lady Clarissa," Rafael replied, turning to face her. "But I believe there is always room for unexpected twists and turns, much like the unpredictable currents of the sea."

"Perhaps," she conceded. "And yet, it is in those unforeseen moments that we often find the most meaning and beauty."

"Indeed," he agreed softly, his heart pounding as the space between them seemed to shrink, drawn together by an irresistible force neither could fully comprehend.

A shout from one of his sailors recalled Rafael to where he was, and he stepped back, silently cursing himself for a fool. This - whatever this was - was madness, insanity brought on by moonlight and the close proximity of a beautiful woman. Lady Clarissa Creighton, daughter of an English earl, was not for the likes of him, and the sooner he convinced himself of that, the better.

"I had best escort you below," he said, his tone clipped. "We will be in Livorno by morning, and I will hire a carriage to escort you to Florence."

Clarissa inclined her head slightly. "Thank you," was all she said, but he felt her eyes on him, the puzzlement on her face at his sudden stiff withdrawal evident.

Not for you , Rafael reminded himself silently as he escorted her back to his cabin and left her in Ana's care. She's not for you.