9. Chapter Nine

Chapter Nine

Confusion swirled around Theresa's mind as she gently pushed away from Richard, her eyes wide with surprise. "I... I need some time to think," she stammered, her cheeks flushing.

"Of course," Richard murmured. He watched as Theresa hastily retreated, her heart pounding in her chest.

She would have saddled Ballerina and ridden away, escaping as fast as she could from feelings she didn't know how to deal with, but with Richard in the stables, she was restricted to her own two feet, which was perhaps just as well. She might have kept on going and never come back.

Instead, she walked, her feet carrying her she knew not where.

Eventually, she reached a quiet stream nestled between two groves of willow trees, and sat down by the water's edge to think. She dipped her fingers into the cool, clear water, watching as it rippled away from her touch.

"Richard," she whispered, the name hanging heavy in the air. She couldn't deny the feelings that had been growing inside her ever since she arrived at Belle Haven, but now that he had kissed her, she felt more uncertain than ever. Did he truly have feelings for her, or was this all simply part of some elaborate scheme she didn't comprehend?

Theresa sighed, pulling her knees to her chest and resting her chin upon them. She loved the life she had found here, with Richard's daughters and amongst the horses and the beautiful countryside, but she couldn't bear the thought of marrying without love. To be with Richard, yet forever doubt his affections, would be more than her heart could bear.

As she sat there, lost in thought, the sun dipped below the horizon, leaving a breathtaking array of pinks and purples to paint the sky. The gentle lapping of the water against the bank seemed to soothe her frazzled nerves.

"Richard," she murmured again under her breath, testing the name as though speaking it aloud might bring some clarity to her muddled thoughts. She knew, deep down, that his proposal was more than she could have ever hoped for in her wildest dreams. A marriage to a kind and handsome man who shared her love for horses, who would make her mother to the three little girls she adored – it was a fairytale come true. And yet...

"Does he love me?" she wondered, absently plucking a dandelion and twirling it between her fingers. Her heart swelled with affection for him, but did he feel the same? Or was it merely a sense of duty and responsibility that drove him to offer her his hand in marriage?

"Theresa," she scolded herself gently, "you must be practical. Love or not, this is an opportunity you cannot afford to pass up." If she were to accept his proposal, she would gain not only a loving husband but also the security and warmth of a home she had never known before.

"Perhaps," she whispered to the breeze, "perhaps I can learn to live with it if he never loves me the way I hope..." But her heart ached at the thought, and she couldn't help but feel a cold shiver of loneliness, even as the warm colours of the sunset enveloped her.

"Miss Wilkes?" called a tentative voice from behind her. Theresa looked up to see one of Richard's stable hands approaching her, his cap held tightly in his hands. "Beggin' your pardon, miss, but Sir Richard asked me to check on you. It's gettin' late, and he's worried."

"Thank you, Thomas," she replied softly, managing a small smile for the young man. "I will return to the house shortly."

As the stable hand nodded and retreated, Theresa took one last lingering look at the fading sky, as if seeking some divine wisdom within its depths. Then, with a determined sigh, she stood and began the walk back towards Belle Haven, each step carrying her closer to a momentous decision that would change the course of her life forever.

"Oh, Miss Wilkes!" The housekeeper Mrs. Babcock hailed her as she entered the house, and Theresa squared her shoulders and forced a smile to her lips.

"Mrs. Babcock. I'm sorry I'm back so late. Did Molly get the girls to bed all right?"

"Quite fine, miss… you've a visitor. She's in the kitchen."

"A visitor?" Puzzled, Theresa frowned. She couldn't imagine who might have come to visit her, especially not so late in the evening.

"Theresa!" It was a familiar face that looked up at her from a seat at the kitchen table, a woman she hadn't seen in over a year, since she left the Duke Street orphanage. Helen Milnes, the girl who had almost had Theresa's job. Helen's golden curls framed her pretty face, and her blue eyes sparkled with relief as she caught sight of Theresa.

"Goodness, Helen! What brings you here?" Theresa asked, momentarily pushing aside the weight of Richard's proposal.

Helen hesitated, looking down at her clasped hands. "I've left my position in London," she admitted quietly, her voice betraying a hint of shame. "Things did not go as I had hoped."

"Use my sitting room," Mrs. Babcock said kindly, glancing round at the kitchen staff, who peered with interest at the newcomer. "You can talk privately there."

"Come on," Theresa said gently, already reaching for Helen's arm. "We'll talk about it over a cup of tea." Theresa couldn't help but feel grateful for this unexpected distraction. For a brief moment, her own troubles seemed to fade into the background, replaced by concern for her friend.

Once settled in the housekeeper's cosy sitting room, steaming cups of tea and a plate of biscuits on the little table between them, Helen hesitated, wringing her hands nervously in her lap. Her voice trembled as she spoke. "I didn't know where else to turn, Theresa. I've made a terrible mistake."

"Whatever it is," Theresa reassured her, "we'll find a way to make it right. You can trust me, Helen."

Taking a deep breath, Helen looked into Theresa's eyes. "I'm with child, Theresa. My employer... he took advantage of me and then dismissed me when he found out about my condition. I have nowhere else to go."

The whispered confession hung in the air between them, heavy with the weight of heartache and betrayal. Theresa felt a surge of anger on Helen's behalf, but she pushed it aside, focusing on her friend's well-being.

"Surely, your employer cannot just cast you aside like that," Theresa said, her voice firm. "He should take responsibility for his actions."

"He won't," Helen replied bitterly, tears streaming down her cheeks. "And I don't want my child to grow up in the Duke Street orphanage. You and I lived that. I don't want it for a child of mine."

Theresa reached out and clasped Helen's trembling hands, offering what comfort she could. In that moment, she knew she would do everything in her power to help her friend, even if it meant making difficult decisions of her own.

Theresa's heart swelled with the fierce desire to protect Helen and her unborn child. If she were to marry Richard, she realised in a moment of clarity, she would have the power to make decisions that could change lives for the better.

"Wait here," Theresa said, her eyes bright with determination. "I need to speak with Sir Richard."

"Theresa, what are you going to do?" Helen asked, looking up at her friend with a mixture of hope and apprehension.

"Trust me," Theresa replied, giving Helen's hand one more reassuring squeeze before she left the room.

As she climbed the staircase to Richard's study, Theresa's thoughts churned with both excitement and trepidation. Her love for Richard had grown steadily since their first meeting, but she knew he did not feel the same. And yet, she couldn't deny the pragmatism of their potential union. It would provide stability and security not only for herself but also for those she cared about.

"Sir Richard?" Theresa rapped gently on the door of his study.

"Come in," came his deep voice from within, warm and welcoming as always.

She found Richard seated behind his heavy oak desk, blue eyes filled with concern as he studied her face. "Theresa, is everything all right?"

"Sir, I've made a decision." She took a deep breath, steadying herself. "If it pleases you, I accept your proposal of marriage."

"Truly?" Richard's surprise was evident, but a hint of relief flickered in his eyes. "I am honoured, Theresa. May I ask what has brought you to the decision?"

"Of course," she said, clasping her hands in front of her. "It is because of my dear friend, Helen. She is in dire need of assistance, and I believe that as your wife, I will be able to provide her with the help she requires."

"Theresa," he said softly, rising from his seat and walking around the desk to stand before her. "You needn't marry me solely for the sake of someone else. If there is anything I can do to assist your friend, I would be more than willing to help."

"Sir Richard, I understand. But to be completely honest, there are many reasons why I wish to marry you. Your kindness, generosity, and understanding have touched my heart, and to be mother to your daughters is a dream I never thought possible." Her voice trembled with emotion. "However, it is the thought of being able to make a difference in someone's life that has given me the courage to accept your proposal at this time."

"Then, by all means," Richard replied, "let us make a difference together."

"Thank you," Theresa whispered, her heart swelling with gratitude.

"Now tell me. What sort of trouble is Helen in, and how can we help her?" He took her hand in his and squeezed it gently.

"Helen is pregnant, taken advantage of by her employer in London and then dismissed without a reference. She didn't know where else to turn." Theresa gazed at him imploringly, begging him to understand and not to judge.

Richard frowned, obviously angry at the injustice of Helen's situation. "That poor girl," he murmured.

"I thought… Mrs. Babcock is slowing down, but has been reluctant to retire, even with the cosy cottage you have ready for her to live in. I thought perhaps Helen could join the household as her assistant, and gradually take over her duties as housekeeper. Ease her into a gentle retirement." Theresa bit her lip, hoping Richard wouldn't think she had overstepped.

"That sounds like a marvellous solution to several different problems," Richard said encouragingly. "I have no doubt Mrs. Babcock will be glad to have someone young and energetic to take on some of her tasks. And Helen can take some time off when her baby is born, and they will never have to be separated."

"I knew you'd understand," Theresa whispered, almost overwhelmed with gratitude.

"Come. Let's go together and you can talk to Helen about her new role, and I will assure her that both she and her child are safe here at Belle Haven as long as they wish to be." He squeezed her hand, and then his smile broadened. "And then we'll have to think about how we are going to tell the girls you are to be their mother now. I confess I cannot wait to see their joy at the thought!"

Theresa's smile in return was a genuine one. Becoming mother to Clara, Anna and Eliza was a gift for which she would never be able to be adequately grateful.

The following afternoon, the sun cast a golden hue over the gardens of Belle Haven as Helen stood at the window, watching Theresa and Richard stroll along the gravel path together. Gratitude filled her heart as she contemplated the new life that had been so generously offered to her.

"Miss Milnes," came the gentle voice of Mrs. Babcock behind her. "Might I have a word?"

"Of course, Mrs. Babcock," Helen replied, turning to face the older woman with a respectful smile.

"Firstly," Mrs. Babcock began, her lined face softening into a warm smile, "I must thank you for your willingness to support me in my role here. It is no small task to maintain a household such as this, and your assistance will be greatly appreciated."

"Thank you, Mrs. Babcock," Helen said earnestly, touched by the older woman's graciousness. "It is an honour to work alongside you."

"Secondly," the housekeeper continued, her expression turning serious, "I feel it necessary to discuss your... situation."

Helen's cheeks flushed, embarrassment and anxiety churning within her. She knew what Mrs. Babcock was alluding to – her shameful pregnancy. The knowledge that her fellow staff members would soon discover her secret, when it was no longer possible to hide her swelling belly, only served to heighten her distress.

"Please," Mrs. Babcock said gently, placing a comforting hand on Helen's arm, "do not fret. I understand the circumstances you find yourself in, and I do not hold you responsible for what a man with no morals has done to you."

"Thank you," Helen whispered, her voice thick with emotion. "You cannot imagine what a relief it is to hear those words."

"However," the older woman continued, her tone firm but compassionate, "it is important that we protect not only your reputation but that of Belle Haven as well. Therefore, I suggest that you take on the persona of a respectable widow, ensuring that any gossip or speculation is kept to a minimum. You are Mrs . Milnes from this moment onwards, do you understand me? Your husband was a sailor, perhaps, lost at sea. Miss Wilkes heard of your sad loss and wrote to offer you the position here as my assistant."

"Of course," Helen agreed, nodding solemnly. "I will do whatever it takes to preserve my place here and repay the kindness that has been shown to me." It was a small lie to tell, to protect her child.

"Very good," Mrs. Babcock said with a smile, patting her hand reassuringly. "Now, let us discuss your duties as housekeeper-in-training. There is much for you to learn if you are to succeed in your role."

As Helen listened intently to Mrs. Babcock's instructions, she felt a renewed sense of purpose coursing through her veins. Though her future would be filled with challenges, she was determined to make the most of this opportunity and build a better life for herself and her unborn child.

"A month?" Theresa questioned. She sat on the elegant chaise in Richard's study, staring at him. He had asked her to come in after their walk in the garden, to discuss the details of their wedding. They had told the girls together first thing that morning, of course, and almost the first question from Clara's lips had been;

"When will the wedding be?"

"Three weeks to call the banns," Richard noted. "We could of course marry earlier with a licence, but I don't think it is necessary, do you? It would only cause gossip. And indeed, to avoid scandal, I think it best if I remove myself from residence here until the wedding."

Theresa smiled, and he knew what she was thinking. Many people considered everything about his household scandalous already, but Richard knew the truth. He also knew that he would not for anything expose Theresa to any unnecessary gossip, and so he would remove himself in order to safeguard her reputation.

"I will instruct the vicar regarding the banns tomorrow, and then I must go to Sandhurst with a delivery of horses anyway." Picking up her hand, he kissed it gently, rather enjoying the light blush that rose up her cheeks at his gallant attentions. "As always, you have my implicit trust to manage things here at Belle Haven, including any arrangements you wish for the wedding. Order some new gowns for yourself, and for the girls, whatever you wish. We do not have time to order you wedding clothes from London, but perhaps we will take a trip after the wedding and you may order anything you please."

"You are too generous," Theresa murmured, looking anywhere but at him. "If you will excuse me? I'm sure the girls will be running Molly ragged by now."

"Of course." He sighed, standing politely as she rose. She made to curtsy, and he put out a hand to stop her, shaking his head. "Theresa – you don't need to do that any more. You'll be my wife soon. Lady Bell."

Her eyes flew to his at that, shock parting her lips, and he grinned. "Does it sound strange? Get used to it."

"Lady Bell," she whispered it, almost under her breath, shaking her head slowly, before she let out a small laugh. "Of all the wildest daydreams I allowed myself in the orphanage, none of them came close to this!" Her smile was like the sunshine as she looked at him. "You have made every wistful dream I ever had come true, and more. Thank you, Richard. Thank you!"

She was gone before he had the chance to tell her that no thanks were necessary, that she was deserving of everything he could give her, and more besides.

In the quiet solitude of the study, Richard allowed himself to contemplate the undeniable truth: he could no longer imagine his life without Theresa in it. She had become an integral part of his world – a guiding star in the constellation of his heart.

"Father always said a man should marry for practical reasons," he mused, the memory of their long-ago conversation echoing in his mind. "Yet, I cannot help but wonder if there is more."

"Sir?" A hesitant voice interrupted his reverie, and Richard turned to find the elderly Mrs. Babcock standing in the doorway.

"Ah, Mrs. Babcock," he said, forcing a smile. "What can I do for you?"

"Forgive me, Sir Richard, but Anna has been asking after you. She wanted to show you a drawing she made today." The housekeeper's eyes crinkled at the corners as she spoke, a testament to her fondness for the young girl.

"Of course," Richard replied, always glad to spend time with his daughters. As he followed Mrs. Babcock out of the study, he couldn't help but think of the family he was creating – not just for himself, but for Theresa as well.

"Anna, look who I've brought!" Mrs. Babcock announced as they entered the cosy parlour where the girls were gathered.

"Father!" Anna exclaimed, rushing towards Richard with her drawing clutched in her tiny hands. "Look what I made for you!"

Richard knelt down, taking the paper and admiring the simple, yet heartfelt depiction of their family. A soft smile graced his lips as he looked at each face – Clara, Anna, Eliza, and, of course, Theresa.

"Thank you, my dear," he said gently, pulling Anna into a hug. "I shall treasure this always." He would frame it and hang it in his study. He smiled as a thought popped into his head, of the magnificent art and tapestries on the walls of the Prince Regent's palace. The contrast could not be greater, but Richard knew that looking at this simple drawing, done with love, would bring him far more happiness than any expensive artwork ever could.

As the evening unfolded, Richard found himself stealing glances at Theresa, who sat by the fire, her attention focused on the book in her lap as she read aloud to his daughters. Her presence filled the room, warming him like the flickering flames that danced in the hearth.

"Theresa," he thought, letting her name wrap around his heart once more. "My love, my life."

In that moment, Richard vowed to himself that he would cherish and protect Theresa, not merely out of duty, but because she had become a part of him, woven into the very fabric of his being.

Tomorrow, he would leave Belle Haven to protect her reputation, not returning until a few days before the wedding, but he promised himself to give Theresa all the time she needed to fall in love with him – just as he already loved her.